Marie Forleo introduction

Hi!

I'm Marie

You have gifts to share with the world and my job is to help you get them out there.

read more

Have you ever not asked for a raise or opportunity because you didn’t want to seem ungrateful? Do you sometimes bite your tongue because you don’t want to come across as bossy, demanding, or aggressive?

My hand is raised. Looking back, I can see how much I devalued myself and was unaware of my personal power.

Today I’m talking with my dear friend and soccer legend Abby Wambach about her new book, Wolfpack. Not only does Abby argue that we all have what it takes to be a leader, but that we each have the power and opportunity to step up and collectively end gender inequality.

What is Personal Power and Why Do You Need it?

Personal power is your ability to direct or influence a course of events, which includes your behavior. I also love Dr. Martin Luther King Jr.’s perspective. Power, he said, is the ability to achieve purpose. “It is the strength required to bring about social, political, and economic change.”

Even if it’s a muscle you’ve never exercised before, you have tremendous personal power. As Abby Wambach says, “Leadership is not the privilege of a few, but the right and responsibility of all.”

It’s no secret that modern culture encourages us to follow the rules. If you’re a member of any traditionally marginalized group, you’ve likely be conditioned to be grateful for what you have, while downplaying your strengths and appetite to do and be more.

Leader is not a title that the world gives to you. It's an offering that you give to the world. @AbbyWambach Click To Tweet

But as you’ll hear from Abby, you have the power to forge your own path, demand what you deserve, and lead others to do the same. Embracing your inner “Wolf” along with supporting and advocating for others can transform our cultural and institutional systems in a way that is healthy, expansive, and beneficial for all.

Join this empowering conversation and learn how to:

    • Stop believing the myth of Little Red Riding Hood — and be the Wolf instead.

View Transcript

Check out this episode on The Marie Forleo Podcast

Listen Now

Now, Abby and I would love to hear from you.

Which part of our conversation resonated most with you and why? What can you do to reclaim your personal power right now?

Leave a comment below and let us know. Remember, share as much detail as possible in your reply. Hundreds of thousands of incredible souls come here for insight and motivation, and your story may help someone else have a meaningful breakthrough.

Important: share your thoughts and ideas directly in the comments. Links to other posts, videos, etc. will be removed.

You can help make the world a kinder, more equitable place. Let’s support one another with compassion — yes, when we succeed, but especially when we fall.

Take it from Abby – A woman who doesn’t give up can never lose.

With enormous love,

XO

You may also like...
Add a Comment

252 comments

  1. DNN

    When I asked for a raise in the past after earning the company over $170k+ in sales, I was snubbed by the general store manager b/c they had something personal against me for claiming religion on the job. Then, this same person gave me a .25 cent raise and told my personal business out in the open so customers and fellow employees could listen. Then continued humiliating me until I was setup for wrongful termination. Now, the “side hustle millionaire” mind has been unearthed and I’m so glad it happened because success is the sweetest revenge. 🙂

    • kay

      DNN! What a jerk that guy was…. I hope you sued them for wrongful termination and violation of your rights. Good for you for proudly rising strong, standing tall and growing!! You rock!

      • DNN

        Thank you Kay. The employer is already making me a “side hustle millionaire” without their knowledge! 🙂

    • connie camorlinga

      Man, I feel you! I earned over 200k for the company I was with. No recognition. It’s just expected, and I was looked at with suspicion for taking a course to improve my skills. Some of these companies just want to keep you small and believing that you’re small so that you won’t create your own success elsewhere. Kudos to you! I’ve recently realized that being terminated is a 🎁 gift. I’m being reminded that I am meant for greater things, and so are you!

      • Claire

        So reassuring to hear other women talk about experiencing wrongful termination as a gift that should motivate you to use your time for more useful and fulfilling things.
        I’m presently in this situation – and I’m having to speak up, not take blame and not be made small. It’s a real test in resiliency. Thanks for the reminder that I’m not alone!

  2. Jenna

    I’m gearing up for “the talk” with my boss tomorrow. This is just what I needed to get in the right mindset for my conversation. I’m trying to push ahead in a male dominated industry and this interview has me feeling empowered and confident to do so! I will ask for what I want because I have the talent to back it up. Thanks for reminding me of this, and thank you for your leadership and inspiration… it came at the perfect time! xxx

    • Yes woman, you got this!

    • Heather- Team Forleo

      Sending you all the wolf vibes, Jenna! Ask for your worth and keep us posted on how it goes.

    • DNN

      Take heed to what Marie emphasizes, and “get that side hustle going.”

      The sooner you start, the sooner you get closer to “side hustle millionaire” $ gUaP $ status! 🙂

  3. So much of this resonated but instead of writing an essay, I want to pull out 2 pieces that struck me.

    I love how labels give us some power over ourselves and the reminder of this hidden power is very welcome today! Especially the link with identity, which is something I began to really learn as a soul-searching teenager.

    When you began speaking about “stepping off the path to find the good opportunities” I grinned because my entire business is about mapping out paths, looking at the crossroads and seeing more options than just the 4 stone paths, but all the grass in between so that discussion was a definite “YES!” moment for me.

    Everything I do, is my attempt to leave the seeking, soul-searching, understanding of identity, wellbeing and our inner fire clearer and more accessible than I found it. <3

    • Heather- Team Forleo

      Sounds like you heard some confirmation within that you’re on the exact right path, Katy-Rose. Here’s to all of us uncovering that inner fire that we all have within.

  4. I heard this while doing my morning walk today. Inspiring as hell!!
    Especially the part where Abby & Marie discuss women and their relation to gratitude vs worth. About feeling grateful but also knowing our worth in our careers, lives etc. Very empowering. Made me wonder why do I forever feel “grateful” for things as if I was lucky to be receiving it (yes, we’re lucky, but we ALSO work hard to achieve things) and how seldom do I feel like I need to step up and demand what’s mine? This whole conditioned behaviour of not speaking up, always saying “sorry” even when you’re not wrong, or “thanks” just to get the job done — is (puke).

    Question: The book is not available on Kindle yet? Tried to search for it in the morning. Link would be helpful if there is one. Thanks Marie & Team Forleo!

    Love,
    Anusha

  5. SO inspiring. Knowing my worth and the value of the work I create is why I keep knocking on doors to find funding to make my films and pay my team a living wage for their skills in our collaborations. I KNOW the big-hearted, socially conscious investors I’m looking for are out there somewhere – now I just need to find them.

  6. This really reached me. When I was a child, I was a natural ‘leader’. I’d always be organising and managing the other kids in my class, and I was GOOD at it. Over a few years of being singled out – and not in a good way, being called “bossy” and “difficult”, it was a talent that I hid away. By the time I got to college and the world of work, when they asked for people to organise groups I had trained myself to actively step back.
    The part where Abby was saying you are born a leader literally made me tear up because it reminded me I still have that in me, I just need to reconnect with it, and nuture it again. Thank you for sharing that message!

    • Heather- Team Forleo

      You DO still have that in you, Louise. How can you start stepping forward more and more? How can you raise your hand and say ‘I’ll do it’ more in all aspects of life?

      You are born a leader and we hope that you’ll raise your beautiful voice for everyone that needs to hear it.

  7. Hi Marie,

    I love this episode. I literally take it from Abby – “A woman who doesn’t give up can never lose”. My personal stand is “everyone is equal’, we excel depends on how we live our lives, people treat us differently but we can always control how we react. We have to set a standard on how we deal with other people especially strangers. Thanks for having this kind of episode. This is so valuable and inspiring my friend.

  8. So incredibly well said, inspiring and powerful. My favorite part was regarding failure and how important it is and how we, as women, need to see other women fail because it does not define us.
    I forwarded this email to my sister, my niece and my daughter and shared it with my Facebook friends because it is so relevant and so important.
    I can’t wait to read Abby’s book and send it as gifts to the women that I value.

    • Heather- Team Forleo

      Thank you for sharing this important and beautiful message with the women in your life, Elizabeth. The more we value the women in our life and practice these messages, the higher we all rise. xo

  9. Kristine

    The timing of this talk couldn’t be better for me! I resigned from my job yesterday and am walking away from a stable yet stagnant career that I have spent over 25 years doing in order to grow my own business. I am truly “stepping off the path to find the good opportunities.”

    Thank you for reminding me that when I ask for the ball, I can back it up. This is a fantastic talk and message.

    • Heather- Team Forleo

      Holy magical timing, Kristine! Good luck with this new and exciting path that you’re on. We’re clearly cheering you on 😉

  10. Hasmukh S Modi

    Privileged to listen to these 2 enthusiastic characters with so profound content and fresh value. Buying the book, today.

  11. Brilliant! Thank you very much! Really inspirational. This is like a cure I needed these days. I will get the book today.

  12. Martina

    Very inspiring interview! Thank you Marie and Abby for this!
    I am just going through a process of selling my company and its a stressfull period. I lost a bit of money trying to develop the company but I didnt succedd, so I have to sell it. So I am questioning myself what have I done wrong, what could I have done better to make it a successfull business, and its killing me.
    Watching this episode I wrote and underlined the sentence: Failures are opportunity to reflect, to reassess, and to begin again and again and again!
    Thats something that I have to embrace and learn. My business failure is not a failure, its something I have to learn from .

    Thank you,
    Martina

    • Heather- Team Forleo

      Martina, think about all of the lessons that you’ve learned and are taking forward into whatever comes next on your path.

      Failure truly isn’t a failure when we use the experience and knowledge for good- for ourselves and the people we interact with.

  13. Wendy Robinson

    The last time I asked for a raise (about a year ago), I was told that I was being “ungrateful”. Not the hiring manager’s words but thats what SHE meant. (Yep! Another woman.) It empowered me and I’ve since found another way to get the raise I deserve but 10 years ago, I would have “grabbed my ball” and sulked home. Action, owner, follow-thru is SO important. I can’t wait to read the book, Abby! Thanks for having her on the show, Marie! Ya’ll ROCK!

    • Melanie

      hey Wendy, what other ways are there to get a raise?

  14. Gosh, I wish I’ve read this and watched the interview before I had my annual meeting with my client. She refused to give me a raise because “I’m paid more than the others in my field” she said. 🙁

    • Heather- Team Forleo

      Lux, now you can learn from that experience and this interview and bring that to the next interaction that you have in your life that involves money.

  15. Bill McCleave

    I am a 82 year old gentleman so you know the time area I am coming from and guilty. Not that did not change over the years but not near enough. Your guests outlook is very inspiring and all my children and older grandchildren will be receiving a copy of the book. I thank you both for the presentation

    Bill McCleave

    • Heather- Team Forleo

      What a beautiful gift and message to share with all of them, Bill. Thank you for watching and for sharing your words with us. We’re so glad that you’re here.

    • Christine

      Thank you for your perspective . As a women I encourage you to let go of the guilt and embrace the fact that you changed your story and those around them. You can give the view of both sides empowering those around you today.
      Thank you.

  16. Just ordered the book from Amazon! Yeehhaaahhh! Finally, someone speaking my language – and giving me strength, hope and confidence that I can do this too!

    • Heather- Team Forleo

      We LOVE hearing that, Jennifer. Yay!

  17. This is one of my favorites talks! I’ve gotten so many things from it. Really brought clarity to many things I’ve always believed and lived.
    I’ve sent this to both my girls. Thank you!!

  18. Monaco Frankfurt

    Going to the Marie TV episodes is for me similar to going to church. Each time there is a particular Bishop or Cardinal making a sermon. Some Masses leave me to be thoughtful and reflective. Some Masses leave me with a sense of balance. Then there are those particular Masses that do not have me slouching in my seat. That have me sitting bolt upright. That have my 100% attention and then some. That have me visualising and making mental notes and actual notes in my bible. That have me wanting to continue the conversation further with other parishioners over a cup of tea and slice of cake.

    This episode was so incredibly timely. Yesterday there was an arsehole male troll taking offense to a new female consultancy partnership that I am with. This buffoon had a few of his followers ‘liking’ his comment. Someone read the comment and instantly counteracted it and that response gained a ‘like’. It is crap like that that can weigh in on our thoughts as we are building our life purpose. Watching this episode with Abby Wambach was the impetus that I needed to keep moving forward in whatever I do. Loving her energy.

    I found this episode (as the previous one with Dr Trent) simply ABSOLUTELY FABULOUS! HUGE GOLD STAR for this one MarieTV. Loving it to the power of 10.
    Loving it so much that I am going back to watch it again. And then again.
    Definite thumbs up from me.
    Big hug (from British expat in Germany) Monaco

    • Heather- Team Forleo

      May this message add fuel to your internal drive, Monaco. Whenever we put ourselves out into the world with authenticity we will get trolls and haters. It’s part of the process.

      You may find this episode helpful as Marie takes that exact topic on with one of our callers on the latest live show—> https://www.marieforleo.com/2019/04/outside-comfort-zone/

      Unless they’re in the arena doing the work, they don’t get a say. Keep showing up, doing the work that will change lives, and know that you have a wolfpack cheering you on.

  19. Thank you very much to both of you for this episode, it was very good for me for many reasons. I fully agree with the idea of ​​not transforming patriarchy into a matriarchy, but of finding bridges so that we all can live in a better world. I live in South America and the societies here have a lot to learn about it. I come from a fairly matriarchal home so I suffered twice the social impact of raising my voice, more from other women than from men.
    Sorry for my english but I wrote with the google translator.
    thank you so much again!!!!

  20. Sara

    Awesome and inspirational. No more apologies. It’s time to step up and not be afraid to request what we want and deserve. And how’s this… maybe it’s time all men start recognizing and acknowledging gratitude for their accomplishments, as well, not just women. We are all responsible equals and we are all part of ONE greater picture.

    • Heather- Team Forleo

      We are all part of one greater picture, Sara. That’s for sure. xo

  21. I watched this last night and posted it in the Women’s Leadership yammer page of my company (I’m an environmental scientist). We’re in the midst of our self-performance/performance evaluations and I encouraged us to watch this for inspiration on how we see ourselves and the opportunities we demand for ourselves. Already getting ‘Huzzah’s’ this morning – people are calling out ‘be grateful and also demand what you deserve’ and the toxic myth of scarcity – we need to champion each other. Getting the book today – woo hoo!

    • Heather- Team Forleo

      Thanks for sharing this episode with the people around you, Julie. When we all think a bit bigger, our circle and the people in it get smarter and more engaged in this work. Bravo!

  22. So many great insights! “Leader is an offering you gave to the world” got a praise hands Amen! from me! It’s such a great service based reframe of leadership. And best of all, it’s true! I loved how it tied into being a leader from the bench also. Loved this episode. Can’t wait to read the book!

  23. Abby, you are awesome. I can feel the force of change you have unleashed upon the world. I am inspired and energised. Love the message of being grateful AND demanding more. I am ready now to call myself the leader that I know I truly am.

    • Heather- Team Forleo

      YES Clare! We’re here for it and are cheering you on. You’ve got this!

  24. Hannah

    When someone says something offensive, what should my response be? Abby’s is, “We don’t have to be that way.” Thank you, Abby!

  25. Robert Lettau

    I live in the Rochester, NY area, so Abby is been a person that we are proud of. The book, Wolfpack, sounds inspiring and practical. Identity can be restricting. Even though I a man, I am not looked at as a person of power and influence. The quote that Marie asked Abby to read was insightful, “Leadership is not a position to earn. It’s an inherent power to claim. Leadership is the blood that runs through your veins. It’s born in you. It’s not the privilege of a few. It is the right and responsibility of all. Leader is not a title that the world gives to you. It’s an offering that you give to the world.” Women do need to exercise greater leadership. But we all need to take more risk and claim a greater leadership role for our lives, which will help to elevate others to reach their greater potential. Thank you.

  26. Sarah

    I’ve replaced most of my screen time viewing to Marie TV (in between my B-School lessons) and it has made a positive impact on my mindset. THIS episode was fantastic and you are both so articulate and engaging that I was literally leaning forward in my seat to absorb everything. I’m going to buy a few copies of the book and use everything I learn to continue to foster confidence and courage in my teenage daughter and teach my teenage son how to work with girls/women to solve problems and move forward out of the dark ages. My daughter just joined her high schools lacrosse team, starting from the bottom and wanting to work up. There are so many fantastic lessons in Abby’s story about not just sports and sportsmanship but leadership and understanding of self and, oh my gosh, the lessons gained from failure. Thank you both for bringing this interview to the world.

    • Natasha

      I’m with you on the screen time viewing Sarah. I’ve cut my TV viewing by 90% because I get so much more from watching Marie TV 🙂

      • Sarah

        Learn more and FEEL better. Priceless!

    • Natasha

      I’m with you on the screen time viewing Sarah. I’ve cut my TV viewing by 90% because I get so much more from watching Marie TV 🙂

    • Heather- Team Forleo

      Thank YOU for being here and in B-School, Sarah. You’re setting a beautiful example for your daughter and we hope this simply adds more tools to your Mom toolbox. Sending you, and your daughter, all the best as you build confidence in yourselves and each other.

  27. Natasha

    I loved this episode – thank you Abby and Marie!
    ‘Let your leadership flourish through other people’ was a big aha moment for me 🙂
    Natasha x

  28. I appreciate Abby’s viewpoint on building bridges. I have worked in male dominated fields for most of my life and have experienced some discrimination. However, I have never dwelled on it and have to say that I would have never been able to learn what I have learned in those fields without the help of my male counterparts. Women approach things differently than men but the approach can be equally as effective. When you combine the strengths of both women and men, you come up with better products, services and solutions. A wide perspective can be a beautiful thing since I have seen it in action. So my takeaway from Abby is that it is not “us against them” but learning how to co-exist while cultivating each others strengths in a fair environment. Great interview, thank you.

    • Heather- Team Forleo

      Thanks for being here and sharing your perspective and experiences, Laurie. We appreciate it so much.

  29. Monica

    LOVE, LOVE, LOVE!!!! I can tell this hour has set the rest of my day & week. I have a workshop on Sunday and what I was going to teach has gone out the window. This is it. I’ll be listening a few more times before I go on.

  30. Tracy

    WOW! Just WOW!! Trust the Universe to bring us exactly what we need and I needed this!! The part about “dimming our light” was a direct hit home for me. I realized that I have let past “failures”, relationships and events to demand that I shine less and devalue myself in order to make others feel better and make them think they are right in the situations. Thank you both, Marie and Abby. This was a powerhouse of an interview. It is high time I turn on my light and shine with the power within. Give me the f-ing ball!! – It is my turn!!

    • Heather- Team Forleo

      TRACY! The ball is yours and is in your hands. Run with it and do your thing. We’re your fans cheering you on. xo

  31. Stela

    Oh my god I loved so MUCH! Thank you my very dear ones, I am filled with balanced power in my most female id.

    Thank you, thank you, thank you <3

  32. Jodi L Schiller

    I love you both. Thank you for standing up and supporting me with all your love, intelligence, wisdom and courage. I can’t wait to read the book.

    • Heather- Team Forleo

      We see you, Jodi. Sending you lots of love.

  33. Wow, this interview and the book are jam-packed with so many great nuggets! I will be sharing! I felt that burn inside me to walk off the path and I am now navigating through uncharted territory of creating my business. At the same time, my oldest son is starting the public education system, in kindergarten, and I find myself questioning whether what’s in place is good enough for him. Are we just teaching him how to play the game? Will he strive to go out and make his own game?

    • Fiona Brookes Butlin

      Pulling my kids discreetly out of the school system to pursue their own interests (mainstream education is compulsory where I live). We prize education, self-awareness & improvement; however, we feel we steer that car better than an education authority.

    • Heather- Team Forleo

      Sonia, as we send kids off into the land of school it does shift how they see the world so as parents our jobs are to infuse as much about the world and how we see it into their lives when they are home and staying alert to how the school is teaching them as well.

      Kids are pretty amazing and the more we guide and lead them, they guide and lead us right back. You’ve got this. xo

  34. Interesting, inspiring, affirming. Thank you, looking forward to reading the book. Recently, as a retired doctor was writing a fairly large check for my services, he said, “This is a lot of money…” to which I replied, “And you received great service for that money.” A younger version of me would’ve been apologetic. With age comes wisdom.

    • Heather- Team Forleo

      YES Jamie! That’s owning your worth and experience. Thank you for sharing that here as an example of knowing your worth and getting it. Brava!

    • Jodie Lea Cleave

      Hell Yeah!

  35. Fiona Brookes Butlin

    Loved this but I can’t remember all the reasons why, mainly cos my kids just got home from school and shifted my train of thought. Will rewatch. I do however remember the excellent TED talk & was really blown away by what resulted from the realignment of the ecosystem by all the parts being there.
    Thanks Marie & Abby

  36. Thank you for introducing Abby to us, Marie!
    I got a new perspective on leadership, one I didn’t expect.
    Thank you!
    xo

  37. Marcela

    “to compete with, not to compete against”… This is my favorite part of the conversation 🙂

    • Heather- Team Forleo

      Such a powerful sentence, Marcela. We agree!

  38. Holy Shit!
    By far the best MF I’ve seen!
    Thank you a million times over, both of you, for your bravery, encouragement and testimony.
    I feel a breath of freshness and permission in this episode.
    My blog is just starting and this is exactly the message I needed to hear.
    You ladies are simply magnificent!
    Every Day Girl ~Kel

    • Heather- Team Forleo

      Keep writing, keep showing up, and be YOU, Kellie. Permission granted. xo

  39. Hi guys,
    Mary from Greece here!
    So honoured to be able to reach out to you, all you fabulous viewers and listeners and team Forleo and, and … I honestly feel blessed to be here.
    What really impressed in today’s episode was the fast pace with which this particular woman actually GREW from the moment she became a parent and she decided to pass on all this knowledge to her daughters as well as to ALL the daughters and sons in the world.
    I am watching this episode again as I want to keep some notes, too.
    Greetings from Greece,
    Mary Proia

    • Heather- Team Forleo

      It’s pretty amazing and special, Mary. We’re so honored to have you here with us, sharing in this episode, and celebrating Abby and her message. Sending you loads of love in Greece.

  40. Nancy

    So much good stuff in this interview, but almost right off the bat the story told about the man who asked if Abby’s talk would resonate with the men who’d be attending and Abby’s response to him certainly resonated with me. As someone who always does my best to be diplomatic, especially, since the nature my professional work in public relations essentially requires it, I immediately realized my response would have been something along the lines of, “Yes it will, I’ll be sure of it.” Or something along those lines. Only later would I have realized the question was one that wouldn’t be asked of a man. I’m going to go out and get Abby’s book.

  41. Wow, I really like this! I think this going to be the book I give to people for their birthday this year!

  42. As a leader who has struggled “not to have a big head” I was deeply touched to think that my leadership is a gift I share with the world.
    Thank you!

    • Heather- Team Forleo

      It most certainly is, Georgie. BE it and share it. The world needs it.

  43. Hello Marie and Team Forleo,
    Tardy to B school, because I found this in my inbox. I know, that you don’t believe in accidents, and neither do I. I have been feeling deflated, insecure, and fearful even though B school has been a shining beacon of light. Then this interview came into my mailbox. I agree of course, with everything that she is about, but what is very hard, is that no matter how much I lift other women up, when I’m successful, it’s crickets. It’s a very lonely world out there for these types of women. How can I say this without being misconstrued…I’m 5’10 and very skinny, Chinese, and a former runway model. (See the immediate psychological reaction I have writing that, feeling that I will be judged?) If I claim myself, there are negative consequences and sure I do not have to care, but it’s very isolating. Even when I feel I have found “safe” women, there are circumstances I find that not to be the case. There was an old Oprah called “The ugly side of being beautiful” and there were models on her program who discuss how they try to be overly nice so that they will be liked and not ostracized by other women. I feel we have a long way to go in this department. Abby Wambach is so elegant and wise. It’s exactly what I needed to hear. Bought her book already lol. AND one of my favorite parts was how you came out and said “I love money, and we don’t want it to roll in it, but we want it so that we can be free.” HUGE. Money and playing small, have been my biggest obstacles. And discussing labels, and how to think about responses before the inappropriate comments happen. Thank you Marie, and Abby, for building a kick ass table with endless seats.

    • Heather- Team Forleo

      Thank you for being here with us and sharing your beautiful and honest words, Linda.

      Lean on the community within B-School as they know what building a business feels and looks like and can be that support group that you’re seeking. We see you and are so honored to have your generous heart in our community. Here’s to less labels and more compassion in the world.

  44. Marcy

    Wow, I’m so inspired by this conversation. There was so much insight and inspiration. I used to consider myself a leader, but then I always felt that being outspoken and confident was not attractive to people so I dimmed my light a bit so as not to be too noticeable, too strong, too whatever, and behaved like the sweet, compliant person others wanted me to be. In college I stepped out of my shell and became the head of a search and rescue team and I worked my butt off trying to organize and create a team that the State rangers could call on in an emergency. In so doing I was called a ball buster, pushy, a bitch. My right hand person was another women who I overheard telling people “who does she think she?” and sadly the message I got again was that being strong, being in charge, expecting equal hard work from my piers made me a bitch, which coming from another women was twice as painful. Repeatedly in my life when I have stood up for something I strongly believed in, spoke out against unfairness etc I have gotten the message from both men and women that this is an undesirable trait, that I shouldn’t be so outspoken, rock the boat, that it’s not very feminine. Ugh! It’s taken a long time to realize that it’s their own feelings of self-doubt or being threatened that makes them lash out at women who are confident. The messages from this episode today just fills my heart to overflowing with reassurance that we should never dim our light to please others. That we should always stand up and be brave, step off the comfortable path, delight in other people’s success, be a champion for what we believe in and help our fellow humans reach their goals because then we ALL win!!
    I can’t wait to read the book and buy it for all my friends. Marie, Abby you are amazing! Thank you for this conversation and for being you!

    • Heather- Team Forleo

      Marcy, raise and use your voice. The world needs it and your perspective.
      Here’s to stepping on our path and shining our light as brightly as possible. We see you and we’re cheering you on. xo

  45. Amazing! There was so much great with this interview with Abby and what she shared. As an actress, in improv, we learn to use “yes, and” in order to help keep a story going forward with a team. Abby references saying, “and” to move forward. Instead of just winning in life, it’s more like, win – and… When I listen to politicians or activists or leaders, I listen more to the solvers who try to work together rather than the finger pointers and screamers. Abby demonstrates how to be broader thinkers in working together in these areas and relationships. And there is so much more. So great. Here’s to everyone being more inclusive, taking risks, learning from them and then, “yes, and … ”
    Mary

  46. LaTonya L Crawford

    OHHHHH my Gosh,
    I am a new fan. I cried like a baby because I have been, and I knew that I have been dimming my light and playing it safe and I know that I can’t do it any more. I am powerful, strong, passionate and courageous and super talented.

    My light is dimmed no more. I will not hide my awesome. I could always see the awesome in others, always could show love, to and for others but baby now………… I am going to be giving me the love and the permission to truly be stunning. Thank You Abby and Marie for being the bad asses that you are and letting us know that it is well within our right to shine.

  47. RR

    During most of my younger career I excelled in sales. I remember specifically having both male and female supervisors tell me to pull back because I was seen/would be seen as “pushy” or “aggressive” while male counterparts were being told they were “assertive,” “persistent” and their behaviors encouraged. I agree with Abby – it’s time we give women permission to demand the ball, but it’s also time for us to know ourselves well enough to make that demand and follow through; to own the confidence when it’s ours, and pass the ball to a sister when it’s not ours to own. Thank you! Today I’m stepping back into owning who I am, in all my power, roles and space.

  48. I don’t know what else to say other than this episode brought the waterworks for me. And they’re still flowing! Abby, thank you 🙏🏼

    • Heather- Team Forleo

      Sending you love and tissues, Korynn.

  49. Jodie Lea Cleave

    I was born in the 60’s, and while rose coloured glasses were way, way cool, over the years I’ve been called a “Rose coloured glass wearing Pollyanna” as a put down whenever I spoke of Human Liberation. I knew without a shadow of a doubt the human race needed freedom from the oppression of inequality. I also knew you got a lot more flies with sugar than with vinegar, and olive branches can lead to enlightenment for all. Fuck! for so long I’ve been terrified to have the ball thrown at me because I didn’t trust I could catch it, let alone back it up. I’ve lived a frustratingly small life, being grateful for the crumbs thrown, yet embarrassed by my meagre existence…until today! I felt a weight lift from my soul and a zing return to my body when hearing Abby articulate what I’ve always known to be true, this has somehow cracked open the suffocating cocoon I’ve been willing to hide in…well ladies, I guess all that’s about to change (even though I’m shitting myself to even write this!!!) as I don’t have any more time to waste. As you constantly say Marie (on tough days I keep you on repeat) “Do first, Think later” My first Do…answer your call to action and comment here, my next Do, celebrate that I’m a survivor and I never give up! and one way or another I will…
    Productively address sexist, racist, and homophobic comments.
    Stop believing the myth of Little Red Riding Hood — and be the Wolf instead.
    Demand the salary I deserve while being grateful for what I have.
    Use failure as fuel to build wisdom, resilience, and bravery.
    Stop being “likable” and play to your strengths.
    Be an encourager who helps others flourish, even after a crushing disappointment.
    THANK YOU!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

    • Mandy - Team Forleo

      This is amazing, Jodie! We believe in you and know you can catch any balls thrown at you and throw them back. We’re so glad Abby’s words inspired you to embrace your inner truth. We can’t wait to see where life takes you!

  50. Sarah Sudhā

    Wonderful! I will seek out the book and spread the news~ it is so important for us to hear again & again that being part of the Movement for equality we are not trying to create the opposite of Patriarchy but that the time now is for solutions based collaborative problem solving through mutual respect and celebration and creative use of individuals’ unique strengths. We do not have any more time for the strong woman with leadership skills to be labelled bitch, witch and all the rest… If women are aloud to be and become their full human Selves, it ultimately helps and supports men to actually access their more full Selves as well. It is a win win experiment of humanity, horizontal & connective that we can create together if we are willing to let go of the over played vertical model of power over others. Earth is leading Humanity in this shift and as we listen and gather courage to forge new pathways, I believe we will surely discover solutions, unbridled creativity and deep levels of joy unknown to us ever before.

  51. Kimberly

    Very inspiring. I love the message that as women, we need to celebrate each other, help each other, and believe down to our core that women’s success is not a zero-sum game. Too many women even at my age (40s) still allow envy, jealousy, and pettiness to poison their relationships with other women, perhaps stemming from childhood beliefs that there is not enough to go around for all girls and women. Once we realize that a woman’s success should be celebrated and magnified, and that if we are successful we can empower other women by helping them, and we lose this “every girl for herself” mentality, we can begin to have the critical mass that is essential to being fully treated as equals.

  52. I love this. I love the two of you.

    I am a wolf but for a little while, I was a little red riding hood. I am a rebel but for a little while, I conformed. I am a lion but for a little while, I was a lamb.

    I’ve changed and these metaphors help me change.

    I have shared this multiple times before 9 a.m. I’ll buy the book this week.

  53. Celeste Pennington

    AMAZING!! Leadership is within all of us!! chills. Loved, yes be grateful and we still need to ask for more in every thing. Also the issue about money. I used to run from the subject and then heard something similar. If the money gets into more of the right hands, can you even imagine what we could do with it all! We have to get comfortable asking and talking about money.

    • Mandy - Team Forleo

      So true, Celeste. Money is just a tool and in the right hands it can be used to create incredible positive change. 🙂

  54. Pauline Salois Gillespie

    Loved this so much! I’m buying the book for me and my son right now. Thank you Abby and Marie.

    • Mandy - Team Forleo

      Wonderful, Pauline! We hope you both enjoy it. 🙂

  55. Heather

    This is just what I needed to hear this morning as I woke to another day where I am fighting for myself and my daughters as I go through an unbelievable divorce. I love the image of being the wolf, not little red riding hood ( the role I’ve played for so long), as well as the notion of being present to face the difficult moments as they come. Thank you Marie and Abby!

  56. Veronica Lebednik

    I found this interview with Abby deeply inspiring as a woman, a professional, an entrepreneur, a mother and a community leader who is looking to pave my own way toward my dreams while fostering the growth of other women in my community. I’m headed out to get her book the first minute I have a chance! It’s motivating to hear the tale of what I’m going through from someone who’s been through it. Thank you again, Marie for finding another clincher!

  57. In one of my last jobs, I was a receptionist and I worked for over a year without a pay increase. But my job responsibilities had tripled since I started. I asked our manager to consider me for a raise. He came to me a week later and said that when he discussed a raise with the business owner, the owner’s reply was “Why does she need a raise? She is just a receptionist.” Those last 5 words shook me to the core. I decided to write a letter to the owner, essentially informing him of my worth and why I deserved that raise. Thankfully, the owner appreciated my letter and apologized for his earlier thinking. He gave me that raise. And I continued to be an amazing and the best damn hard working receptionist I could be. That was one of my most proud wolf moments. (Give me the effing ball!) Thank you Abby for your empowering words. Reminding me to find my power and know my worth. Can’t wait to read your book!

    • Celeste Pennington

      Love this story. Way to ask for what you deserved!

    • Mandy - Team Forleo

      Good job, Karri-Ann!!! 😀

  58. A BIG HELL YESSSSSS!
    If we keep playing by the old rules, we will never change the game.”

    As I’ve said my children always: you don’t ask you don’t get it. And is a very wise friend of mine said to me, closed mouths don’t get fed.

  59. Dr. Elane O'Rourke

    I know why I listened to this today. I teach gratitude, humility, worth. And, my trouble with acknowledging my worth and demanding recognition for that isn’t about gratitude and humility: it’s about fear.

    Thanks. Seriously.

  60. Marie – this is one of the best interviews I have ever seen on Marie TV. Thank you…

    xx

  61. Madina

    The part about being a leader on the bench – is the one I always did, but had no idea that means to be a real leader. Thank you for the inspiration! I really enjoyed this episode and proud to be a part of womenhood!)

  62. Ginny Birskovich

    I LOVE this woman!! The thought of speaking easily and softly in response to a personal challenge is really difficult for me. Emotion always rears its ugly head and I feel worse than the person I’m talking to when I finish. I would love to develop that skill – the skill to speak easily and eloquently like Abby. I would love to just sit in the room with her and absorb her confidence and eloquence. Thanks for sharing your time with us!!!

    • Mandy - Team Forleo

      It’s definitely easier said than done. Abby’s tip about practicing responses before they happen can help, though. We’re so glad her wisdom resonated with you.

  63. Kathy

    Excellent. Every woman should listen to this. Great for teenage girls to hear also.

  64. Grace Yang

    I so LOVE this episode. So much golden nuggets inside.
    I particularly love “the only label I use now is HUMAN”. This is so true. We are so living in the labels we use for ourselves and how others see us. That’s how we limit our potentials.
    Another fav. one of this episode is that “Be grateful and claim what we deserve”. This is the amazing balanced energy of feminine and masculine in my eyes.
    Awesome interview. I am sure i will revisit this episode soon. It fuels up my soul today! Love love love!!!

  65. Abby Wambach is a total bad ass in every sense of the word! Love me some Wambach!!! Loved the book “Forward” was riveted…didn’t put it down start to finish….on my way out to get “WolfPack”!

    • Mandy - Team Forleo

      Yay, Catherine! We hope you enjoy it as well. 🙂

  66. This was an amazing episode in which I felt empowered as a woman! I really loved how Abby highlighted on the importance of getting rid of fear, putting yourself out there and taking ownership. Also, I she emphasized on the fact that failure is an important step of success and that we should embrace it in a positive way for growth. I liked how she encouraged us to keep pushing despite it all in order to achieve success. These are powerful messages I will embrace as part of my entrepreneur career.

  67. Powerful! The story about Abby asking the man what does a male speaker have to offer women really was impactful and important to share.

    Owning who we are as a person and knowing that our contribution is important in the world is incredibly important right now. Plus asking for the ball and then running with it is soooo good to.

    thank you for this episode; going to go get some Wolfpack!

    Xo
    Radell

  68. Megan Nashville

    I’m going to run off to some Etsy shop and order a WWAD bracelet! Wow, was this so impactful. I’m currently pushing myself and unearthing my own inner leadership brand that suits my soul and this was EXACTLY the episode I needed to have for my personal rally sessions. I also walked away with two new Post-Its on my wall:
    1) “Be grateful. And, also, demand what you deserve.”
    2) “If you’re not a leader on the bench then don’t call yourself a leader on the field.”

    Yaaaaassssssssss, ladies!

    • Mandy - Team Forleo

      Such a great idea to have a Post-it wall of inspiration! 🙂

  69. This was great! I could listen to her all day long. So inspiring! Thank you!

  70. Keri

    YES!!! What an awesome interview! So inspirational and empowering.
    I listened to my gut 3 years ago and quit my successful corporate job without anything else lined up. I was terrified and had a lot of tearful moments but I knew I had to take a risk. I ended up starting my own freelance business and now the company I used to work for is my client, I get to work on more interesting projects without politics, office gossip or red tape, get to work part time so I can spend time with my daughter, and earn far more per hour.
    I love and am so grateful for every penny I earn and am so happy I took the leap.
    I will carry many of the teaching from this interview into my daily work.
    Thank you!

  71. The “leading from the bench” conversation REALLY hit me. I am definitely in my “benched” season. After being divorced, hospitalized, laid off, and working a job at half the pay I previously made and hating it, I realized that I have not been leading myself or others at all! I try to just keep my mouth shut around others, but inside I have been miserable! Complaining, feeling less than/insecure, and ungrateful. I realized that these setbacks have been really rough, but I want to lead myself well through this “benching”. My game is not over, I need to be more positive and grateful for the things I do have. I also can still lead from where I am at.

    • Mandy - Team Forleo

      Beautifully said, Ariel! We love your shift in perspective and have our fingers crossed things will be better soon.

  72. Nicole Ardiel

    This was such an inspiration on so many levels. I’ve been running my own business (a very small, but respected, employee benefits firm) for 17 years. Recently, I’ve been asked to speak to other women in our industry about “being a woman” in the very male-dominated patriarchy that is the insurance industry. Something Abby said about being a HUMAN was so powerful – how about we focus on that, instead of continuing to put ourselves in boxes? Plus, I LOVED the line about if there aren’t enough chairs at the table, bring fold-out ones. SO GOOD! Finally, so much of what Abby spoke about resonated with me because I played very high-level regional soccer (as a goalie, no less) for 30+ years. I have learned so many of my leadership values and had so many life lessons from playing on a solid and competitive team. When I think about it now, we carried our fold-out chairs on our backs for so many years — we just didn’t realize we were doing it. The “beautiful game” still inspires me and my team is still a constant source of pride. And my passion for my business and my leadership within my career stems from so many of those on-field moments. Thank you, Marie, for giving us the opportunity to learn from such a remarkable guest; and thank you, Abby, for your incredible courage and your stunning gifts that you so generously shared with all of us. xoxo

  73. I’m paraphrasing but the point that Abby made around women making a bigger stand for one another – specifically that when a woman is down, other women say it’s okay, now you rise…

    Also on a personal level, the last part of the interview where Abby speaks about flipping the perspective of what women experience has also given me a greater confidence with an issue I am currently facing in my personal life, where I feel intimidated and unheard by the men who are involved. I think its true, we can either buy into the script they’re writing for us, or go, forgive me gentlemen but there’s another way to view whats going on and it goes like this… and then, like Abby says to be prepared to make a stand for that view again and again…

    Also Marie – because of the way my life has been I haven’t been able to watch some Marie TV for a while – its a joy to reconnect to your show and I love the way you give your interviewees so much space to reveal whatever it is that is important to them.

    a great big howl of appreciation to you both, x

    • Mandy - Team Forleo

      We’re so glad you’re watching the show again, Laura, and that this episode has some timely nuggets of wisdom for you! We’re proud of you for committing to speak up more and we can’t wait to share more with you soon.

  74. Thank You Marie, Thank You Abby. It’s not about Male vs Female. Yes, all women have suffered thru time. So have all men. It’s about Women and Men being the same species.
    We are both the human species. We feel the same rights and wrongs. We must learn the same lessons to stand up and offer what we have, regardless of our mutual suffering, or joy. So, its great that Abby had the realization that her book is for Humanity, NOT gender bias, but for all of us in the Human Race. To stand up for ourselves, empower others too, share what we’ve learned and offer it to all those who may need it. Great Show !

  75. Amazing. I love – “if you’re not a leader on the bench, you can’t be a leader on the field”. I got it and I’m running with that today.

  76. LVanderlinde

    All. The. Feels. I love and appreciate this perspective. It’s fresh! It’s not all about conflict but incorporates respect and cooperation while still being feisty AF. ‘The opposite of Patriarchy is not Matriarchy’ is such an important concept for getting to equality. Thank you!!! 🙏🏼

    • Mandy - Team Forleo

      Exactly! There are ways to navigate the existing world we live in while still asking that world to change for the better. 🙂

  77. That was powerful. Abby’s last statement on the episode or her first statement in the book was WOW!! YES.

  78. Anita Patel

    I was highly inspired by this talk with Abbey and Marie. I admit I was not familiar with who Abbey was but she sounded like a fantastic person. Hat’s off to Abbey for writing this book and for telling her story. It is true we have to feel more positive about failure because those are the best ways we learn life’s lessons. I will definitely try to catch that book, right now I have so many books and so little time to read them! lol

  79. Tina

    This is the first full episode I have had the opportunity to listen to – beginning to end. This was so powerful.
    Thank you.

  80. Thank you sooooo much for this episode.
    Everything was inspiring, but probably what will stick with me over is:
    – demand what you want and then follow through
    – leading is doing what’s best for the team, do what you’re best at.

  81. Powerful conversation!! So many take aways. I really loved the stop labeling yourself concept and stop believing the labels, that are conditioned in us by society. There are just facets of control and oppression. Love the metaphor of becoming part of the Wolf Pack and love (know) the story about the wolves healing Yellowstone. I walked away from the conversation feeling in my power. For me there is an Artemis rising moment to it. She is the Goddess of our Wild (Non-domesticated Self) and She is an archetype for our deep connection to our instincts, intuition, personal sovereignty, benevolence, reverence, and healing. Which are the Divine Feminine super powers!! And our latent in all of us Humans. Yes, the time is now to create ~ new leadership and to create a better story of alignment with our Divine strength and grace for our future generations and our animal kingdoms, through our truest of Selves. She is rising! Balance and Harmony! Thank you! I must buy the book!!

    • Mandy - Team Forleo

      Yay, Lisa! Embrace your power! 🙂

  82. This episode is on constant repeat. So many nuggets. I am implementing many of the nuggets shared here. Content + inspiration for other women will be increased like never before on all of my platforms. #wolfpack

  83. Yes, Yes and Yes!!! Thank you for this Marie and Abby! I can’t wait to read this book!

  84. Lisa

    I truly loved this. I am co-chair if Pride at a. Bank in Australia and have just shared it with my whole crew.

    What I loved most was the talk of path. Last week I was told by a colleague (from a place of love) that to be promoted I’d need to basically completely transform my whole image and no longer show up as me.

    I had been struggling with whether or not I should change ……. I truly believe the Joseph Campbell quote around if you can see the path it isn’t yours…. and was still waivering. You have given me the resolve to say fuck that, I will show up as me AND stay the course as I consciously created coming to work as myself, 100% and live from the inside out so that’s YOU.

    Oh and begin again is my favourite mantra, love it.

    Small cheeky invite that we are doing a Pride podcast series that I fought for budget if you’d care to create something similar to this interview in Australia?

    • Mandy - Team Forleo

      Love this, Lisa! And we’re proud of you for your commitment to being yourself.

      If you’d like to invite Abby on your podcast, there’s a contact form at the bottom of her website where you can reach out: http://abbywambach.com/

  85. Kathy

    I so wish I had messages like this when I was a young adult! I am now rebuilding my life after illness and divorce. The part that resonated with me is the bench leader! I may have had struggles of my own but I was and are a damn good mother who has encouraged my daughters to pursue their dreams. I may not have been there physically but mentally and emotionally I’ve been more than available. The blessings in the struggle! One of my daughters has taken your course Marie and she’s the reason I follow you. Thank you for being unapologetically you! Close to 60 years old I’m finally getting it! Will be buying this book for all my family!

    • Mandy - Team Forleo

      Doing your best is always good enough. 🙂 We’re thrilled you and your daughter are both MarieTV watchers and we hope you all enjoy Abby’s book.

  86. What spoke to me most intensely was the idea that leadership is not the label that world gives you but an offering that you give to the world …thank you ladies for the amazing work…this gives me motivation to show up fully in the world because the people around me can see that and be inspired ❤️

  87. Michelle

    I loved this talk! The message is very powerful and useful for all of us.
    I have to say when I looked at Abby I was like, she is confident, she is solid, and I want that! It is not an easy road but I can see so worth it. The two of you are so strong and inspiring!
    Thank you for sharing!

  88. Diane

    Thank you Marie! I enjoy your channel always. I hope you don’t mind me asking, but I would love to know where you purchased the cool chair Marie sits in and those wooden artisan looking coffee tables? I really like your taste. Thanks!!

    • Mandy - Team Forleo

      That’s a really good question, though I’m not sure of the answer! We hired an interior decorator to make the most of the tiny studio space and he picked out furniture from a couple of different places in NYC.

  89. Rebecca

    Abby, I agree: I can be grateful for the recognition of my accomplishment(s) and also know that I’m deserving. I worked damn hard to get myself here! Btw, after listening to your interview with Marie, I purchased Wolfpack (at an actual bookstore no less!). A store employee told me it was the forth copy she’d sold today!

    • Mandy - Team Forleo

      So cool! We hope you love the book as much as we did. 🙂

  90. Oh my goodness, this interview speaks to me! I’m currently on this path, speaking out against the chauvinistic attitude in the dog industry! And this interview has told me that I’m on the right path! Thank you so much Marie + Abby!!!

  91. This was such a great episode. I was feeling like shit today, regretting quitting my job, getting down about how to make ends meet and feeling really scared. I feel like i’m on the bench today. Listening to Abby talk about who she was going to be on the bench, and how she was going to lead from the bench-made me snap the fuck out of it. I also wrote a book, and I wrote short stories because I want to say so much in a little bit of time. I can really dig a writer who has so much ability with words that they can give you all of them in a small amount of space. In one bite you get all the flavor, if that makes sense. She said so much about value and demand and work and sometimes I don’t know what to do, I get lost in my head and my worries…and I’m thinking it’s because I am trying to do something someone elses way. Trying to walk red riding hoods path when we all know i’m a m-fuckin’ wolf. Thanks for the cursing, you really made me feel at home. BTW, I’m a bschooler and I played defense and goalie in HS

    • Mandy - Team Forleo

      The beautiful thing about being an entrepreneur is that you get to forge your own path and you don’t have to do things the way others might expect you to. We’re proud of you for how far you’ve come and encourage you to embrace the call of your heart for where to go next––your heart doesn’t lead you astray. Keep going; you got this!

  92. Melissa

    I love money too. I love to see other women successful. I want that success for myself.
    At this point, my financial situation is such that I work a job where I do not find a great deal of passion in. I try to focus on the positive aspects and for now, I’m making the most of it. I was struck by the comments in relation to money because I further realize that I also want freedom. I want freedom over my time to do what I want to do and to serve humanity in the best possible way. I was struck by the comments regarding successful women. How no successful women were thought of as those who held onto the course and played it safe, rather they risked, theywent off course, they took the leap, they did it!!
    I am in the process of brainstorming about how I too can take the leap, to reclaim my power, and to have freedom over my time and life in a way that up until now, I’ve only dreamed was possible. I’m committed to carving out the time to explore that further and in more detail. Mainly I want to figure out what that looks like at this point. I want to have fun again, to find my joy, and find ways that I can share this passion with others.
    I want more, I want much more than I’ve been offered so far from the “status – quo” life I’ve earned by playing by the rules, trying to fit in, staying small.
    I want to be that bold and powerful woman but I recognize about myself that I sometimes feel a disconnect, or lack of confidence maybe. I’m committed to finding out more and exploring this for myself further, building my confidence, and finding that passion, and having the courage one day to take the leap into the unknown. To take the risk. To be that successful woman!

    • Mandy - Team Forleo

      Beautifully said, Melissa! We want all those things for you too. <3

  93. Roberta Giannini Todrzak

    I love Marie and Abby! You both light up the world with your wisdom and leadership…all that you bring to life for women (and men). I love the definition of “Legacy” and “Leadership”. Accepting the hard times with our best selves. I am truly inspired. The discussion confirmed beliefs I have but others in my life “put me down for”. Thank you, thank you!!!!
    Love you❤️❤️

  94. Abby’s thoughts on legacy made me tear up. In our culture, we’re all so dam focused on leaving our mark, but sometime forget that our mark is only how others felt when they interacted with us. No one cares if we wrote a book or recorded an album. They care about how that book, or album, or painting, or speech made them feel. Did it make them think differently about where their spending their time? Did it challenge them to see others in a new light? Did it comfort them when they needed comforting? Our legacy isn’t about us at all. Letting go of the notion of self is when others can begin to expereince our legacy.

    • Mandy - Team Forleo

      YES, Kendra! Exactly this. <3

  95. Yvette Sealy

    This episode was so inspiring for me . I am experiencing a situation where I have to demand what I want and take ownership. I love that statement. I also like leading from the bench.

  96. Cheryl

    Bravo Amy and Marie! 2 Things:
    1. I’ve coached and trained elite male and female athletes for 40 years with more “first woman to” and “year of the woman” experiences than I’d like to count (and, yes, with the gut-punch, mouth-on-the-floor reactions to some of men’s questions, statements, comments). Amy, you mentioned something so important:
    When you are advocating for yourself or for improvements/opportunities for a team, project or division you run, or are being interviewed/negotiating for an opportunity…and you’re dealing with, often men (but not exclusively), who are not used to dealing with and respecting your advocacy as a person…as a woman…it’s essential to prepare for the types of responses you might get and rehearse, and rehearse and rehearse how you might want to respond as the person you want to be. It might be a statement or a response you rehearse, or it can be the presence—the mode out of which you want to respond.
    Way back when I was getting my Ph.D. at age 23 (in what was called “the year of the woman” because they “allowed” 3 of us in!) and in a final Ph.D. Candidate interview where your committee has the final say about whether they would accept you or not, I knew this one professor was a master at asking that ‘one question’ which often derailed people or was one of those mouth-on-the-floor moments. I decided I wanted to respond with some humor that could diffuse it. He asked a doosie and I did respond with some good humor that had all of us chuckling, and best of all, it put us all at ease and on the same level of respect. That taught me so much.
    2. Pay Equity is Essential. Yes, it’s about Respect. Yes, it’s about Freedom. These two things are very important. But of even more importance it’s about our Financial Survival and our Health as we age. Life calls upon us to deal with very difficult things. They hit you in bunches, and often the expenses are huge and you can’t work, unless you have developed multiple streams of income that can bring in money for you. (This is why Marie’s B-School is important.)
    Whether it’s taking care of teens and aging parents and in-laws, unexpected deaths and all that is required, or taking in kids who have been orphaned through tragedy to give them a home. You never know what will be asked of you, and it affects women and their financial welfare disproportionately. Even very successful women are often not prepared. So, yes, ask for what you deserve (and not be grateful for the crumbs), back it up with results, and start developing your side hustle ⟹business as soon as possible. My “hits” began early at age 35 and I’ve helped so many women friends of mine in their 40s -70s get through them, but they were not financially prepared.
    Love the book, Amy. Will purchase it.

  97. Kathleen Carr

    Hello Marie, Hello Abbey,
    Can’t wait to buy the book for myself, my son’s my daughter, my sister…….
    You spoke about real meanings in life. Especially, the eco system and the wolves. Looking forward to the TED Talk
    Perfect I am from Portland, Maine. I get it.
    My favorite part was mentioning Little Red Riding Hood, the straight path, and the wolf.
    This fairy Tale is a new Adventure for me to Journey.
    Thank You
    “ARH-WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!

    Another great read, Women Who Run with The Wolves

  98. I’m a retired retired police officer who lost her way once my profession was over. Listening to Abby say that it wasn’t the game that made her great it was her who made the game great resonates with me. I always prided my self of taking rookies as they called it under my wing to let them no they weren’t alone and I helped in anyway I could. Hearing Abby say we have to champion one another just hit home. I worked in a male dominate profession and I know what it’s like to feel like you can’t say you are good at what you do and to always feel grateful. I can go on and on but this was totally meant for me to hear as I am finding my new purpose in life in this second chapter. All I can say is thank you and I purchased two copies of the book.
    Jaydeen 🙌🏻

    • Mandy - Team Forleo

      Right on, Jaydeen! With or without the work you do, you still matter.

  99. Wow this conversation is profound.

    Give me the ball!!!

    I am done being a quiet people pleaser not trying to ruffle others feathers.

    I pray that I say what needs to be said when it needs to be said.

    Thank you both and all for the medicine of the moment.

    Aho Amen Ashé Namaste 🙏

  100. Maria Fernanda Ferreira

    I absolutely loved Marie and Abby!
    I have learnt so much by watching this video, I liked when Abby said that she likes to be around people who like to take risks, I am the same.
    I am like this statement: “If you’re not a leader on the bench, you can’t be a leader on the Field”, what an inspiration!
    I am enrolled in a leadership program, which I am sure I can learn heaps too but by watching this video I felt that I have just learned what I would learn in a year, thank you so much for sharing it.
    I have 3 dreams : 1) Study the Women and Leadership program, 2)Study Juris Doctor,
    3) Study Psychology , they are all very expensive courses but with determination, motivation and focus I am sure I can achieve them!

  101. I wrote down some of the things Abby said as they resonated so much. But I guess the real impact for me is what I then write down about myself. I asked myself what lifting up other women means to me? I wrote that I have been a leader and that I have leadership within me. I asked what would happen if, for a time, I stopped asking for permission? And I realised that I am in the phase of reflecting, reassessing and beginning again. Not every moment has to be a moment to use your tools. Some moments are for gathering them, maintaining them and sharpening them. Thank you Abby. We love you.

    • Mandy - Team Forleo

      So well said, Helen! This is a fantastic piece of wisdom.

  102. Hello Marie and Abby!
    This was—not unexpectedly—an inspiring and important interview, and I’m going to listen/watch again, because I watched it so late I was nodding off…oops! But I watched the end this morning, and then I discovered:
    1) There’s a MARIE FORLEO PODCAST!! I’m a B-Schooler and managed to miss this, how’s THAT possible! I just subscribed and I’m INTO IT!! (Podcast addict!)
    2) AND I discovered the Copy Cure course- HUH WHAT?? YAY- signed up for that, too.
    So I am jazzed up, and also looking forward to re-watching the interview, too, of course!
    What resonated with me (possibly because I was AWAKE) was the re-framing that men might try, seeing things from a woman’s perspective. I grew up #4 of 4 and only girl, and our family was hyper-male-oriented. Maybe a good preparation for society as a whole, but warped, nonetheless. I’ve started calling out my brothers, but it sure is awkward! We are all over 50, so it’s truly ingrained. Still, ‘nuf’s enuf!
    Last takeaway: Marie, you are BEYOND AWESOME! XXX Katharine

    • Mandy - Team Forleo

      YAY, Katharine! We’re so glad you enjoyed this episode and discovered these other facets of Marie’s work. The podcast is the audio version of the episodes, so you can listen on the go. And we’ll be officially opening The Copy Cure in a couple of weeks, so stay tuned. 🙂

  103. Emelia

    Just speechlesss – A woman who doesn’t give up can never lose!!! Boeyaaaa

  104. Thanks Marie for ‘introducing’ me to Abby. Huge inspiration. Buying the book today to share with my subscribers. 🙂

  105. Celeste Elizabeth Arnold

    I absolutely loved how Abby peels of the layers of any type of boxing due to status, job etc. by simply saying she is human – and that’s it!
    It freed me in a sense I haven’t felt before and I’ve seen so many episodes of Marie TV.
    I was born in Scotland, raised in Skagen, Denmark and my family is rooted in New Orleans, Louisiana.
    I’ve always felt like an in-betweener also by studying aesthetics and culture (nobody knew what the f…. it was) and starting blogging about behavior and climate while working a part time job as a coordinator of volunteers and cultural activities for the elderly.
    Sometimes I’ve felt like I was on the bench for a long time. But I loved how Abby encourages us to step up and never give up. Fail big to actually become wise, brave and kind. Wauw – that just nailed it for me! And made me a better mom, instantly.
    I’m so going to buy her book – not only for myself!

  106. Carol Read

    This is one of my favorite episodes of all time. i remember putdowns about selling my book coming both from men and woman. Some of these people were younger than me. The worst was when an organization I went to get help from snickered and ignored me. I thank the universe for this course .

  107. I’m in the middle of a failure valley but it feels like it’s been my whole life. My marriage is failing so I moved out of state only to find that I love where I left but haven’t found a way back yet, I’ve never been able to make much above minimum wage (the job I just took is a huge step back in terms of tasks and salary but I didn’t get any of the other jobs I applied for because I apparently haven’t figured out how to leverage what few experiences and useless degree I have), no salary negotiation I’ve attempted has succeeded and I feel like I’ve always been off the beaten path and it’s kept me stuck and now terrified for the future. I’m really needing some community (I’ve never been successful at that either) and encouragement and connections. I know that griping isn’t the best way to go about this but I wake up every morning shaking with anxiety and fury about how stuck I am and how badly I want freedom and to give to the world in an authentic way. I’ve tried career coaching twice and I guess I just haven’t found the thing that works for me yet.

    • Mandy - Team Forleo

      All this sounds really tough, Megan, and I’m sorry you’re going through such a challenging time. We’ve got our fingers crossed for you that things will get better soon, and we hope this MarieTV episode will be helpful: https://www.marieforleo.com/2016/08/stay-motivated/

  108. Yawn

    I am moved with the idea that we need to champion each other and we have to believe that all boats rise. I agree to that idea because I grew up watching people compete with each other because of the scarcity mentality. Why not help each other out instead. In the future we need more people who would continue and make each others’ boats rise. Thank you MarieTV. : )

  109. Jillian Pelliccio

    I’m completely in agreement about turning the fairy tales on their heads for the purposes of the metaphor. I’d also like to offer an additional perspective. As a parent of young children stories like this are very effective to help them understand danger and to listen to their parents so we can protect them from realities they don’t yet understand. I believe the issue is that there are no stories to replace these, especially for women, as we get older. We just got left off at the end of a fairy tale and launched into the world defenseless.
    Thank you Abby and Marie for providing the tools we need!

    • Mandy - Team Forleo

      I’ve never thought about it that way before, but it makes sense! Thank you for sharing this thoughtful insight with us. 🙂

  110. OMG, I loved this episode!!
    I love how wise Abby is and I loved everything she said. Right now I’m struggling with a pay raise that I want, and definitely Abby’s words “demand what you deserve” touched me. I’ve been thinking that I can’t be asking so much, undermining the job that I do, postponing the meeting where I ask for it, and doing so many other things not to take the “risk” of demanding what I deserve. But, with this episode, this words I feel strong enough to do it, I think this is the push that I needed to be courage and finally do it.

    • Yes – demand for what you deserve. Not just for yourself but for all womankind. I regret so much looking back trying to ask for what I deserve and cowering under the pretense of false justification vs. the what is truly right. Go for it and report back! You got this.

  111. great Mary and Abby! it’s inspiring from here, France! we need this kind of thoughts here, our country is lost.
    I struggled all my life in the music business, so I’ll continue anyway to create, to play and write songs and you give me the strenght to do it! like a reminder, we’re not alone 🙂 the feminine rises, all over the world. but lots of job is necessary to change the things deeply!
    thank you for this video mary
    cheers

  112. Rhonda Reichert

    Loved the conversation! So looking forward to the audio book I’ve already downloaded. I think the biggest part for me was about taking risks and letting others see you succeed and fail. It’s time to rise up and be who we are. So inspiring. I could listen to this over and over. Thank you Abby.

  113. I need to watch this again. So many key moments to take in. Demand your worth – then kick ass with it. What glass ceiling – I build my own house. The list goes on and on. I’m so inspired and have put this book on my list. Thank you so much!

  114. LOVED every minute, but I think my favorite was when you (Marie) said (to the effect of): “I know when I’m masterful at something. It’s like, ‘you can just go take a nap now – I’ve got this.'” YES !!! ❤

  115. I’m inspired by this episode to 1. buy Wolfpack and read it and 2. definitely do something I’ve been mulling around in my brain for the past few weeks. I have been looking for a PR woman to help me with my business. A friend recommended a guy she knew, but I’ve been wanting to hire a woman. It set me off wondering if I was being sexist, limiting my options, but today watching this episode, I realized no I want to hire a woman, and for that matter when my team grows I want to hire all women. NOTHING against men, love men, heck I’m married to one 🙂 but my business is all about coaching women holistically through the spiritual transformation that is menopause, and I knew deep down I want women to help me reach and support women on that journey. Thanks Marie and Abby for inspiring me to say a definite yes to what I’ve been feeling!!

    • Mandy - Team Forleo

      Love this, Sheridan! And consider this: every time you hire a woman, you’re uplifting her dreams too. You’re empowering her economically so she can contribute to her dreams, her family, her education, and her community. That’s a beautiful thing. 🙂

  116. Kate

    Oh my GAWD! Holy. This episode has lit a fire under me. I can’t wait to read this book. “Give me the effing ball!” I LOVED that! I also realized that I haven’t experienced demanding what I want… or that it’s even a thing. I’ve always loved the idea of empowering women, and coming together as a community, but there was something missing for me- it felt too passive. THIS is what was missing! I love the idea of being wolves in a pack-because aren’t we?!
    AND- make mistakes. Ditch the path everyone else is telling you to be on.

    AHH! So happy to be part of this tribe. I’m going to go get to work on my art side hustle-and start connecting with the female powerhouses I know about this movement. ALSO- to all y’all ladies kicking ass in the comments dealing with workplace BS- you are SO inspiring! Thank you so much for sharing <3

  117. Yes! Yes! Yes! This is why I wanted to start a business as a money coach, to empower women (and creative) to empower themselves! Money is an equalizer and it can command respect. It’s important to know how to do this. I’m getting this book now! And Abby, I’d love to talk to you about this book, on my blog, or on a video chat! (Hey, B-School teaches us to reach out to Influencers, so I’m just putting myself out there!)

  118. Hello Marie, Abby, and All!
    This is ((DEF)) a FAVE SHOW for Me.
    And I suspect many of us.
    Thank You Both!
    A couple of MANY Points that Stood Out:
    1.”People will watch what the Leadership does.. and we’re all Leaders.”
    2.” We’re not Competing against each other, but with each other” (In convo re “Scarcity”)
    3.”To Let our Legacy move forward through other people”
    4. And Yes…”Gimme the Effen Ball!” Needed to hear that. This is what Leaders Do Yeah!
    Looking forward to reading Wolf Pack.
    With Great Appreciation,
    XBernadette

  119. This is so good! Abby is my new hero, and yes, I ordered her book before I’d even finished watching the video. 🙂

    • Mandy - Team Forleo

      Awesome, Laurie! We hope you love it. 🙂

  120. The nuggets of “We don’t have to be like that”and “A woman who doesn’t give up can never lose” are both so powerful. Thank you for sharing this interview. It’s encouraging and empowering! -I’ve just shared it with a client.

  121. Lydie

    I like the part on leadership , about 42min in ,, although I would re-phrase ” what you have done for others” to ” what you have done WITH others” , as you can’t be leader all on your own 🙂 xx

  122. Renee

    Wow! So many nuggets of gold here!! For me the biggest was about failure being your fuel. I failed big time in my first biz. And I have allowed that to hold me back for so long, in so many ways, for fear of judgement and criticism. Not any more, I’m going to take that experience and turn it into my greatest victory, for myself, but mostly for the people I can help by sharing it and the learnings from it. Thanks Marie and Abby 🙏🏻

    • Heather- Team Forleo

      Not anymore, Renee! Use everything you learned as fuel for whatever you choose to bring onto your path next. You’ve got this.

  123. Iris

    Amazing!! Thank you Abby for sharing your wisdom with us, and I can’t wait to read the book. For so long I have been trapped in my own self because of childhood traumas, where years ago I could not begging to put the words together and be heard. Instead, I always bottle up everything… I have finally learned that when we believe in others, we are actually believing on ourselves. We can speak, we can feel brave, we can feel that we belong, and finally break through our titles we learned to put on to ourselves based on fears, or either given by others. Thank you once again.

  124. One of my favourite interviews you have done. Abby is amazing and a true leader. The Wolfpack story has stuck with me and I will definitely be watching the TED talk. This has made think about looking to the past to gain insight for the future. Re-introducing wolves to balance the ecosystem….what else could be re-introduced that we have lost? Its got me thinking:)

  125. I love love love that you want to bridge the gap between men and women… such an important message. Thanks for bringing awareness to this. It matters and we are better together.

  126. Hilda Belmont

    Huge episode, as always!!! I loved the big chunks of wisdom…So many insights
    I loved leading from the bench and stop playing it safe
    I loved your concept of money as freedom and respect
    This last added to my morning affirmations ritual where Money is energy and it is great because it allows me to pamper me and my family.
    Thank you Marie and Abby for opening my eyes again!

    • Heather- Team Forleo

      Money is energy and it is great, Hilda! Keep those affirmations coming.

  127. Firstly thank you both so much for sharing access to this conversation, it came at the perfect time. Downplaying my strengths has been my defense mechanism out of fear of being seen as “too much”. Hearing this story has been a lovely reminder to stick to my truth. Abby’s statement that she and her team mates were competing with each and not against each other has set my mind on a whole new trajectory of thought. Big thank you for such valuable insight into what a true leader looks like, I can’t wait to read the book! Namaste x

  128. Sara Vanecek

    Incredibly inspiring, positive and motivating! Made my heart race, the way it does when you hear something great that also resonates personality. This is awesome. 💗 thank you both!

  129. Love love love every word Abby spoke! I’m beginning a project that helps retirees feel valuable and so much of what she said about women applies to aging. Scarcity is a big component of the competition between young and older in business, but I hadn’t seen it that way. Gold! And, her ideas around “leading from the bench” give me tons of ideas for how to move from the head of the table to a more supportive mentoring role. Awesome!!!

    • Heather- Team Forleo

      Your idea sounds amazing and inspiring, Kay. Retirees are just getting started in many capacities and we think what you’re doing is amazing. Good luck and keep us posted on your progress.

  130. I really enjoyed this conversation because as a woman who is building a business to empower and inspire other women, I do feel it is my responsibility to continuously be educated on how to lead. I felt inspired and I loved the Leadership quote at the end. It is definitely a mic drop!!!
    I just purchased the book and I am looking forward to reading it.
    Thank you Marie & Abby.

  131. Deirdre Sumida

    Yes, money equals freedom, and it also equals *power*, and that’s o.k. for women to want too — power to make a difference, to change lives.

  132. Abby, Marie…wow! So impactful for so many reasons. However my stand out is about leading from the bench. I’m buying this book for May daughter. Abby, you are her idol. She watched you in that World Cup. This was her first season in high school soccer- she wasn’t a starter and some games barely played. It was so hard for her. I know this will resonate with her. Thank you for continuing to be an amazing role model.

    • Heather- Team Forleo

      Sending you and your daughter lots of wolfpack encouragement and support, Suzanne. Tell your daughter that she has her own cheering section on the internet and that we think she’s amazing.

  133. Monika

    Amazing, one of the best and most empowering episodes!! Thank you!!

  134. Beautiful, stunning, powerful and true…I watched this episode over 3 days and it was uncanny how an event during that very day was answered with just a few sentences watched that afternoon! It was incredible.

    The most powerful for me was ‘demand for what you know you deserve…but you better back that shit up’!

    Sending copious amounts of love and gratitude…❤️❤️❤️

  135. Benson Modie

    Wonderful……..and absolutely transformational!

  136. Jean Howell

    In the past I have been called aggressive by colleagues as I’m not afraid to stand up for myself and others. Occasionally this will make me think maybe I should be just be more of a yes person but if I were I would just become miserable as I am a proud strong woman. I just wish there were more of us out there!

    • Mandy - Team Forleo

      Your strength is an asset and we want every woman to be a strong woman. 🙂

  137. All of it … so profound! So happy to hear this type of dialogue coming out! I’ve shared this video with my network and will be diving deep into her book finding actionable items to work towards in my life!

  138. Yes yes yes… for men to read a women’s perspective and take responsibility for finding themselves within that. Hallelujah!

  139. Marie, amazing outfit! …Wow, this is SO POWERFUL: “Money is freedom. Money is respect. And until this gap closes, we are lacking in freedom and respect.”

  140. Ginny

    This was a powerful interview…I really identified with 2 points:
    1. Playing it safe even in my rise in my career because I didn’t want to be seen as “bitchy” or a complainer.
    2. Leadership is what you give to the world and not what the world gives to you…I habe always felt that inside me – to always lead a situation, others I am in relationship with to a better state or place in themselves.

  141. Stephanie

    Wow, I feel like I get to digest this information now. What was most insightful? Really listening and hearing that women, that I can demand for what I want. And to be able to be responsible and take action. To be credible and back it up. I love learning and feeling intelligent and I feel some men think of it as like I am taking their power from them or, some type of fear overrides in them. I want to be inspirational to men and women and create an impact on the world! That power is infinite and abundant and universal. There is plenty to share and relish in for all. The power to love and achieve and to speak with confidence and strength is necessary for growth and accomplishment and this episode supports me In continuing on with endeavors.

    • Mandy - Team Forleo

      Yes, yes, YES! So beautifully said, Stephanie. We’re rooting for you!

  142. Deb

    Totally upfront here, it took me weeks to get past my biases and listen to this episode. I also must confess that I was surprised and grateful for the episode. What I learned was something about myself and about my perceptions and about my blockages. For that I am forever grateful to both of you. Thank you for allowing me to get past myself and to embrace the leader that lives within me. Much gratitude and movement toward what I deserve and am worth!

  143. This was amazing! There was so much good stuff in this episode but the phrase “you don’t have to be like that” used as a way to calmly call people to higher ground? I will remember and use that one. I loved it.

  144. Rome was not built in a day so l like it when you said you needed to develop a muscle for a deficiency at a point in time in order to master ahead. And if we think positive everything’s possible as we live for each other as one family on earth. Thanks a lot.

  145. Thank you so much Marie for bringing Abby Wambach in for an interview. So inspirational. I listened to the audiobook and will listen to it again, and again. I LOVE when she says “I AM HUMAN” wow, she is AWESOME!!

    • Heather- Team Forleo

      Thanks for sharing your time here with us, Joanne. We love that you’ve already listened to the audiobook. Sending you a wolfpack high five.

  146. Awesome interview! Thank you, Marie! Thank you, Abby! I especially love the message, “The simpler solution is sometimes the path of least resistance.” This reference to the re-introduction of wolves to Yellowstone is very powerful. Being an artist and a huge conservationist, I bring attention to these important relationships in one of my paintings to help people understand that predators, and in this case, wolves, are an integral part of healthy ecosystems. We’re all connected. And thank you both for helping me to believe in my power to make the world a better place, for people and for nature. Leadership is an offering I give to the world.

  147. “Women have had to find themselves within content presented from the male’s perspective for forever. It is essential to flip this and allow men the opportunity to find themselves within content presented from a woman’s perspective.”

    As a man, can you please help me do this and or suggest how to truly start the above process. I assume it starts with and will always include a healthy dose of empathy and compassion, but I could use some help. I don’t feel like I created this wide gap and the need for bridges to be built necessarily (or not consciously anyway), but I am here so it is my responsibility and either way, I certainly need to be part of building said bridge. Please help.

    • Heather- Team Forleo

      Thank you for being here and sharing these words, and your honest question, with us Garrett.
      Each of us can make big changes and strides for belonging and connection with others in all areas of our lives.
      If you’d like, maybe start with observing your environment and how the dynamics are different for men and women. At work, how many women are around the table? How often is their opinion asked for? In your friend or family circles, what are the roles that women are usually doing versus the men?
      In any instance, can you observe them and see how they’re different? And then can you ask yourself what could occur to ensure that they are more even? Oftentimes things are occurring and we may not even notice them. By simply observing things through a different lens you may be able to figure out how you can start to shift opportunities, environments, and roles so that everyone gets a fair chance and interaction.

  148. It’s true! Things happen for a reason. I’m in Marie’s B-School (woot woot!) working on my educational consulting business. I want to design professional development that isn’t the same old thing. Something that actually makes a difference in the lives of teachers because happy, badass teachers create meaningful classroom-based learning environments for kids. After listening to Marie & Abby, I’ve got lots of ideas to help teachers own their power by building a supportive community who are not afraid to take a step off the safe path. I’ll launch this online & in-person course by July!

  149. I freeking love this interview! It is a must watch!!! One of the most important pieces for me comes at the end when Abby makes the statement that “the opposite of patriarchy is not matriarchy, we need to build bridges……We need to figure out how to solve the problems together!” As a former Advocate in the field of Domestic Abuse, I was often labeled as a Feminist (in a not so nice way at times) and I had to clarify I am not a Feminist, I am an Equalist. It is not about us vs them. It is about embracing and appreciating our different experiences/view points and using our unique talents for the betterment of everyone PERIOD-THE END!

  150. Valerie

    I ordered the book even before this was over. Loved this episode and am looking forward to reading.

  151. Alana Taylor

    The passion with which Abby conveys her story and viewpoint and philosophy makes her message compelling. I best love the part about being HUMAN first… and that it is only letting go of our stories that propels us into change.
    It is a mindset that I teach my yoga students and my children and that I follow and in fact I forwarded this episode to my daughters – its so important to find your voice but at the same time understand its not about “them vs you”..
    I will continue to focus on coming from a place of personal betterment and will continue to approach resistance and opposition with that statement – “We don’t need to go here”. When we raise ourselves up, speak up for what is right (as a human not a specific label) we raise others up around us. Thanks for this inspirational episode (tears were shed x0 ) and if Abby were to come to Vancouver I’d love to see her talk.

    • Caroline - Team Forleo

      Thank you so much for watching and for sharing your thoughts and insights, Alana. We’re honored that you shared this episode with your daughters, and hope it’s an incredible source of inspiration for them as it was for you!

  152. Hey everyone,
    I’m watching this episode and hearing myself saying “uhm uhm, yes! ” all the time. Looks a bit crazy, but hey.
    Something’s bothering me though: why is Abby always talking about women AS a minority? I help women expressing themselves with assertiveness and love & respect.
    But why keep TALKING about us as a minority? I feel like I’m going back on my energy level.

    • Caroline - Team Forleo

      Thank you so much, Lili – we’re so glad you enjoyed this episode!

      Regarding your question, Abby is referring to women as a minority in a literal sense. Even though a lot of progress has been made, there are still tons of companies, schools, clubs, and other spaces where women are in the minority.

      When someone is in a minority it can lead to real challenges, however being a minority doesn’t have to be a bad or negative thing – it just means there may be additional challenges for them that wouldn’t exist for the majority group. Anyone can be in a minority and still express and assert themselves, and in fact, many who do can make a huge difference!

  153. Tanya

    I love this. I can’t get my hands on Abby’s book soon enough!

    The quote about leadership from the book, moved me to tears.

  154. Creece Rubia

    I learned so many things from both of you which I can incorporate in my repertoire. As a trainer of highly quirky youth of this generation (that’s how I label them with gusto hahaha), I guess nothing changed in the perspective of students. Students watch you especially your reactions, your movements, your slips, everything, if you are truly a role model for them. Except those who even go beyond by creating their own illusions about the “leader” of the pack, believing and spreading what they think for some mysterious reasons this generation can only understand easily. I also take that into consideration and demand them to toe the line all the time without let-up. I guess, that’s my only demand.

    Keeping fit and always long steps ahead of this generation so that they will not overthrow the “old school leader” while supporting their dreams and protecting their rights which they themselves are confused about is a balancing act. Complacency is a no-no. I always try to figure how to become more effective. Guiding my trainees to become busy in building their muscles by wrestling against their own failures make them excited to learn something everyday, build their skills and grow in an atmosphere of care and compassion.

    Showing them that I am also vulnerable to errors and mistakes to point out that I am also a human being and not a robotic despot is less stressful. Allowing them to see and correct my own errors with the yardsticks that I taught them is part of the training. It’s just like administering an injection without them feeling any pain because that’s how they can respect the leader – expertise and mastery in “curing the sick”. And even the teacher gets sick sometimes.

    I always refresh my approach and techniques even with very basic things that otherwise could be boring, even to me and this is possible through continuous education and discovery. Discovery is a passion indeed. Both resourcefulness and creativity play a major part in winning and succeeding but the old school discipline should provide the structure and frame for the entire panoramic picture of success.

    In addition, success has no substance without health. Good if not perfect health is the ultimate balanced benchmark of success – physical, financial, social, spiritual, emotional health (freedom from disease in these areas). Maintaining success in any of these areas is just like polishing a mirror, we must always check and remove the dust that has settled on a regular basis to keep the standard or raise it. Hence, success is an everyday or periodic concern.

    • Heather- Team Forleo

      We’re so honored that you took the time to watch this episode and share your insights with us, Creece. It’s clear that you’re a beautiful example for many people of a life well- lived- that’s beautiful.

  155. Anne-kirstine Klitmark

    I am grateful for this interview and deserving of what I am about to write… FINANCIAL FREEDOM. I would say when I am on the bench I am feeling shame, and sad of the position of the student loan that I am in. Lets say I have also done soul work in the archetype of the service nun. I have hit a bench point, where I need to take that failure feeling, financial distress and find my way to claim money for my soul work and create the system in me that liberates me to do so. I feel this shift calling so many women around the world. Money is necessary to respect and freedom! So true. And money are NEEDED in the hands of woman and men like us that wants to heal our earth. I am cheering myself now for the step my step to get there!

  156. G

    I think that all of the information Abby talked about it applicable to all humans. I understand the reason behind writing it towards women, and when listen to free from gender or race bias, it makes an even more powerful presentation. Excellent Interview! Great work Abby and Marie!

    • Heather- Team Forleo

      Abby does talk a lot about both men and women doing this work in her book, G. This perspective is well served for all genders and human beings.

  157. A newly converted Abby #fangirl here! I have always known I’m a leader – but I have either rejected it or given the power to someone else so as not to upset the applecart. Sounds like it’s about time I took that back ! I also loved what Maried said about getting older and no longer giving a f*ck – A to the M to the E to the N!

    • Heather- Team Forleo

      Here’s to owning your leadership and power, Alex. YES!

  158. Really I enjoyed this post.

  159. I am loving what Abby is laying down. Buying the book for me and my Momentum Journey (Mojo) midlife group webinar attendees. There are SO many quotes that I’ll be using in my coaching practice social media.

    While the badassery is simply phenomenal, I also resonated with how aware Abby is of not making others wrong.

  160. So many parts that brought me to tears. I feel like Abby is speaking to my DNA, this is so deep and cellular for me. But, the part that really brought me to tears, is when Abby read/distilled the forward to her book. The part about men reading this book to understand themselves better, and to understand their “people” better — the women in their lives. My head was nodding so hard, I need a chiro adjustment! 🙂 Thank you Abby. I needed to hear this now, in the head space I’m in which is very, very angry and filled with pent up rage. I plan to share this video far and wide, and buy every lady I know this book for any major holiday we celebrate.

  161. I have to say that this video was absolutely effing amazing! Thank you both. The way that both of you interact on this interview is magnif-ulous! Truly took away how, “leadership is the blood that runs through your veins. It’s born in you. It’s not the privilege of a few. It is the right and responsibility of all”. Furthermore the mindset muscle Abby explained where failures are an opportunity to reflect, to assess, and to begin again and again and again. I have finally bitten the bitter pill and learned this and can see now from start to finish where failures have been the way to get to myself time and time again. When the brain finally goes, ah-that’s-what-that-means and it finally clicks! We can call it riding a bike and getting up again is the way to see life, I love yoga so for me its learning through doing yoga over and over and over and constantly having this learning clicking, failing, learning clicking and when applied as a mindset to life – we know it in us what we want to do.
    Oh, and this point about being grateful and also demanding what we deserve, what a moment and what an explanation to this simple truth. This path of asking is the only way to express and act on what we want and to make it count. Thank you for expressing it in a way that is sharable! xoxo, Valerie

    • Mandy - Team Forleo

      Right on, Valerie! These are all fantastic insights and we’re thrilled Abby’s words spoke to your heart. We appreciate you tuning in and love how you’re channeling this wisdom through yoga. 🙂

  162. DNN

    Setbacks are nothing but a setup for the biggest comeback! 🙂

  163. Jennifer Bardell

    Goosebumps.
    Strength. Wisdom. Power. That’s what this talk gave to me.
    Instead of complaining about the amount of work needed to make this job my own and being so concerned about failure, JUST FUCKING DO IT!!
    I can handle the success and I can learn from the failure.
    I am woman, watch me create.

  164. Wendelijn

    I am only half way watching and already emotionaliteit. Wow what a heroic and exemplary woman. Much love!!!

  165. WOW. Just wow. Best guest interview EVER!! (Okay, well…I keep thinking that watching these), but did I say WOW? Adding this book to my Audible library now!

  166. Luciana Ridi

    Hey! As always, awesome interview. But one thing i’d like to say is that Marie, you felt SO natural, like you were really in the moment. It felt to me like a was with two dear friends drinking mate in my living room. Love from Buenos Aires. Luci.

  167. Wade

    I had a big failure about a year ago. BIG FAIL. I was given what I had hoped would be my “dream job” in January 2018. Turns out I wasn’t doing well enough technically and wasn’t fast enough to be successful in the job. I had great interactions with my mentees and with the people around me but the work I was producing just wasn’t good enough. I was let go.

    I felt so ashamed. I didn’t ask for the job, it was given to me. I had gone to school for this but it was two years since I graduated and I hadn’t kept up the practice. And I failed. And everyone disappeared. It was like I was suddenly invisible. As if my job loss was contagious. People I had thought would be supportive never said anything to me, and haven’t to this day.

    So I heard, I mean heard and absorbed and wrote down, the part about failing, about taking risks vs playing it safe, and women seeing other women fail and supporting them. Because all of that was my life. I took a risk with that job.

    I was super apprehensive because I knew I hadn’t kept that muscle working. I even said thank you but are sure you want me in spite of my lax production since graduation? I was told if I didn’t take the job I would be let go because my current position was being eliminated. I was also told that if I wasn’t good enough, fast enough, or if they simply didn’t like me (yep, they said me, not my work), I would be let go. In spite of all that I took the job. I had to not just because I couldn’t not have the paycheck but I had to try it. I had to take the risk in this TOTALLY new career field. I knew I would kick myself if I didn’t at least try it. If I gave up immediately because of all the warnings I was given before I was even hired, I knew I would be so mad at myself.

    Every day I walked into that office and did the best I could. I tried. I did lessons online. I read up on trends and other things to help me bolster what I knew in my head but had a hard time articulating technically. I tried so hard. And I still failed.

    But I did it! I went in and did my best and I at least, at the very least, got off my butt and took a huge risk. What I learned, and it took a few months to learn this, was that as much as I liked what I was doing in that job, I didn’t like the corporateness, the politics, the having to please everyone knowing I would never be able to. I liked mentoring the younger people but I hated everything else.

    Having that clarity really changed how I approached what I was going to do with my life next. I sat down and made a list of what I wanted from my next job, from the people I would work with, from the atmosphere, the things was I not just good at but that I enjoyed doing, and how I wanted to work with any potential people.

    That was really important too – not just how I would be treated but how would I treat other people. Sometimes you can get into a rut and not be able to see how that rut is affecting others.

    I took that list and applied it to every application and interview I had. I listened to my gut when it gave me that tightening feeling that something just wasn’t quite right.

    I ended up in a really great place. I have amazing co-workers. They are supportive. I’m supporting them. My brain is more clear. The work is good, I enjoy it. I still get to do some advising. And because I feel free, I’m able to work on the muscle that wasn’t working right in that old job but without all the politicking and corporateness required. The only person I have to please is myself.

    And I’m quite pleased. The people who disappeared from my life at the time of my dismissal are not in my life at all. It feels good to shake them loose. The people who did support me and bolstered me during that time are still with me. They deserve my attention and support, just as they gave me when I was flailing. Not everybody deserves my time. It was a hard lesson to learn but I’m glad I did.

  168. Wow, I’m embarrassed that I didn’t listen to this interview before! Or maybe, this was the right moment to do so. Abby is one of the people I want to invite for dinner. This conversation, with Abby and Marie, made me realize so many things as a person and a female in this society as we know. I’ve never been apologetic for been a woman, I am who I am, but that doesn’t mean that my ideas and actions haven’t been “conditioned” by the patriarchy society. But Abby had pointed out the problem and possible solutions to my lack of confidence as a professional; as a person. I want to help other so much, that I come across as “demanding” and “controlling”; and that is far from my real intentions. Here and now, I see a path where I can “fix” my ways and become a real leader to others.

    • Renee

      Yay! We’re so glad Abby’s interview found you when it did, Veronica! We’re so glad you’re taking steps to help others and building leadership confidence along the way. Keep going!

  169. Thanks so much for this. In particular I loved the idea of being unafraid to ask for something but, when you do, doing something with it. It’s true that if you don’t give up, you can never lose.

Let us know what you have to say:

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *