Marie Forleo introduction

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I'm Marie

You have gifts to share with the world and my job is to help you get them out there.

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“Did I really NOT break any bones?”

That’s the question that was running through my head. Especially in those first few moments as I was stumbling around the gas station in a state of shock and disbelief.

I kept grabbing parts of my body to make sure everything was intact. As soon as I realized that yes — I was truly OK, I turned to my group of panic-stricken onlookers and said, “Look. I’m not done yet. I want to go again. Right now.”

The fear of failure can be paralyzing. But you know what’s even worse? The fear of continuing to fail, especially after you’ve just taken a pretty big hit.

If you’re challenging yourself to grow creatively, emotionally or even physically, at some point along your path, you’re going to stumble. Could be a minor misstep, a full-on flop or something in between.

A fall isn’t final unless you stay on the ground. Click To Tweet

Failures (i.e. challenges, lessons, mistakes, gifts — whatever language you prefer) are guaranteed. What matters most, however, isn’t the fact you stumbled. What matters most is what you do immediately after.

Because the decisions you make when you’re down determine how high you’ll eventually fly. Bottom line…

Don’t give the fear of failure a chance to harden in your bones. Get back up while the fear is fresh.

In this episode of MarieTV you’ll learn about my recent face-plant in Italy and how to be empowered by your mistakes, not trapped by them.

Check out this episode on The Marie Forleo Podcast

Listen Now

Now I’d love to hear from you. In the comments, tell me about a time that you wiped out, whether literally or metaphorically. What did you learn and how did you grow as a result?

Has a fear of failure — or a fear of repeated failure — ever set in? What action could you take right now to get back in the game?

Share as much detail as possible in your reply. Thousands of beautiful souls come here each week for insight and inspiration. Your story may help someone else reclaim their courage.

Important: share your thoughts and ideas directly in the comments. Links to other posts, videos, etc. will be deleted as they come across as spammy.

No matter what, remember this. When you get knocked down, it doesn’t mean that you’re weak, stupid or incapable. It means you’re human. You’re brave for trying.

Thanks for sharing your perspective and making this corner of the Internet a truly spectacular place.

With all my love,

XO

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248 comments

  1. Literally falling down when you’re an adult is about the most terrifying and embarrassing thing that could ever happen to you. I did it in a parking lot about 2 years ago. And I’ve fallen metaphorically multiple times, too. It can be embarrassing to brush yourself off, face the people who witnessed it, and continue on. But what I have found each time I’ve fallen (either actually or metaphorically) is that it’s much easier to move on when we acknowledge that we fell. It amplifies our humanity somehow. It allows people to put themselves in your shoes. It makes you relatable. And I think that’s the best way to show up authentically in this world. Not with a mask on. Not with the facade of invulnerability. But with the guts to put it all out there and OWN IT. Even when you fall on your face (or the other end).

    • Dear Lori, I think the same way like you and you said it so beautiful! Thanks!
      Also thanks to Marie and the whole team for all the great things you share with us!

    • Beautifully stated, Lori Reeves. I couldn’t agree more! I too face planted in a parking lot recently. Very scary, but nothing broken, a few stitches in my nose and I got a pair of new glasses from the restaurant owner! Last year I spent three months working to get a new book published. The process was miserable from the start, and my intuition kept asking me, “How’s this going for you?” My stubborn Taurus mind kept soldiering on, believing that things just had to get better, because this publisher has such a sterling reputation. Finally, at the moment the book was almost ready, I was told that the publisher “couldn’t” print the title of the book on the spine. Say WHAT?? Obviously a book without a title on the spine can’t be placed on a shelf. Libraries won’t buy it. Bookstores won’t know what to do with it. REALLY? I wrote to the CEO of this very famous publishing house and received no response and lost most of my investment. What did I do? I resolved (again) to never (again) ignore my excellent intuition. I also freely shared my embarrassing experience. It’s especially embarrassing because I use my intuition every day in my career as counsel people and their pets. So, yes, we’re human and vulnerable, but resilient if choose to be!

      Thanks, Marie for another excellent, inspiring and confirming show. We adore you!

    • Beautifully said, Lori! Thank you! “…it’s much easier to move on when we acknowledge that we fell. It amplifies our humanity somehow. It allows people to put themselves in your shoes. It makes you relatable. And I think that’s the best way to show up authentically in this world.”

    • I was thinking that exact thing! As children and young people it’s pretty normal, but as we get older it’s not something we’re used to. I wonder if our fear and reaction to falling contributes to the way we bounce back from setbacks in our personal and professional life as well.

    • Lori, you are a beautiful writer! I loved was you said!

    • I fought amicably to win a falling down war. I’ve fallen metaphorically several times before I joined Marie’s inspiring lessons. I won the fight because of Marie’s inspiring words. Find me today, I am strong and well equipped. Long live Marie.

  2. Wow! What a coincidence… Two big big falls this year – once while indoor bouldering
    and last week while running – i was jubilantly jumping over icy puddles. I’m bruised and sore from both falls (and at 52yrs I’m not exactly a spring chicken) but nothing broken! Especially not my spirit! I’m taking big leaps and jumps professionally and personally which are paying off.

    You’ll see why I’m commenting here (I don’t usually)- so here I go jumping again! Blown away by the coincidence and so happy to know I’m on track 🙂 . Thanks Marie.

  3. I just wrote about fear the other day, having come across a quote that read “Fear is a liar” and it struck me as so true. There’s been so many times in my life where has creeped in (or tidal waved in!) and tried to stop me in my tracks.

    I love this inspiration around fear and thought I thought I would share a little prayer, a meditation. A mantra. One to help us as we step in front of fear today and say “no.”

    I thought these words would help us all as we reach into the start of the week and pluck out our to-dos. Our schedules. Our meetings. Our chances we take.

    To remember the words (and this lesson!) as we take a chance, find the flow and get out of our own way.
    Say it once or 100 times. Anything to stop what might stop you.
    ⭐️
    A fear prayer:
    Fear. You and I have no issue. You show up as you see fit and I acknowledge your warnings. But fear, please know, that your warnings take no hold on me. Your stopping points do not jail me where I sit. I move forward, through you, with small actions. These small actions, they will mount and I will muster up my courage and fortitude and I will put my blinders on so that I may fly. Fear you are a liar and I will not believe your lies that fight my heart because in my heart the truth lays bare and I surrender to it, not you.
    ⭐️
    Happy Tuesday, everyone! I hope this helps! May your day be full of unwavering gumption and bravery.

    • Anne

      Thank you for sharing that wonderful fear prayer!

    • Emily

      Thank you so much! This gives me new clarity.

    • Emily

      Thanks Marie!
      It’s so nice to listen to a blog with some vulnerability in it. Those are always the most inspiring. This week I had a crash landing with my husband in a time of pressure, which thank God we mended last night (that’s always so painful while it lasts). And creatively, the submissions process for literary journals! I like to go back and re-read the notes I wrote to myself after receiving rejection letters. Both in love and creativity, it’s just so wonderful to stay in the game.

      • That’s really what it’s about Emily! Staying in the game 🙂

    • Thank you, Licia! That was so kind of you to take the time to share!!
      I feel fear but it doesn’t stop me. I love your prayer 🙂

      • Hooray, Claudine! I love how you’ve said “I feel fear but it doesn’t stop me”. AMEN to that, lady! That’s the way to slay 🙂

        xoxo

    • What a great prayer!
      I’d like to post on my website if you’re cool with that.

    • Kirsty McGovern

      Great prayer Licia, that was just what I was looking for today! Thank you

  4. Very timely message today Marie.

    Since the beginning of this year I’ve felt creatively ‘lost.’ Kind of like my ideation and implementation chops have flipped my scooter.

    Like you, I get up each day and try again. However, I’ve not found the person/trigger/device that can help me find my mojo. I’ve been meditating, walking, daydreaming and writing and nothing clear is coming up for me.

    I’ve never felt so off-track or vulnerable before. Advice and/or suggestions welcomed. xo

    • Jackie,
      Hi there. It wasn’t so long ago that I was in the same boat as you, feeling lost and confused and well, plotless 🙂

      Trust me when I say that everyday that you get up and try – it builds on itself. Each day as you take another step (no matter how small or fruitless it seems) you’re building a foundation that will help you get your mojo back. There will be a day when it all clicks together from this showing up and just doing and on that day you’ll see how every little bit of work that you did (writing, meditating, talking to friends) all aligns and shows you exactly where you need to be…

      It may take a while. It may be slow. But know it’s happening just as exactly as it needs to and we are all here to cheer you on and say “keep going, you got this” and trust, trust, trust that as Rumi says “What you are seeking, is seeking you”.

      I don’t know if this helps but I’m rooting for you!
      xo
      Licia

      • Lucia – thank you so much. Sometimes I find it hard to trust the Universe – your reminder that just doing the work was the encouragement I needed.

        Thank you xo.

  5. Marie — it takes a brave, real . . . or somewhat crazy person to admit their most embarrassing moment so I figure I’ll join the ranks! In 2005, I was literally on death’s door but had no idea how ill I was. I was speaking at a women’s conference in Atlantic City, NJ and became so ill — I vomited in a planter in the ballroom in which I was speaking. Beyond mortified, but also so sick — I had no shame. After making my way (barely) back to Boston on a connecting flight from NJ (really!), I went immediately to my local ER and was transferred the following morning to ICU at a major Boston Medical facility. Within three days I was in a coma and within a week, I underwent an emergency liver transplant. Long story short, I was in a coma for two months, in ICU for three and clinically died twice during my transplant surgery. Oh, I also underwent brain surgery about two weeks post-surgery and into my comatose period. I guess after that, tossing your cookies in a ballroom planter pales in comparison, right?

    • Kristin - Team Forleo

      Oh Nancy, what a story! I’m so glad you’ve recovered.

  6. A few years ago, just after making the decision to move into a SUPER pricey apartment in Brooklyn, my husband lost his job. We had gotten a 7k loan from my sister to put down on the apartment and we would be able to pay it back in about a week… until this happened. My husband was an independent contractor, so there was no severance or anything, just no more job, effective immediately. We plunged into debt and despair…

    But what it revealed was how much of a breakdown our relationship was in. We always had money so we never had to actually LOOK at how we deal with money. Have a problem? Throw money at it. We didn’t need to partner around it because we had so much money that we could just coast along and fix things as they came. But it was actually a mess. The blessing in disguise of him losing his job was that we got to experience being truly BROKE for a few years. We learned how to budget, how to track our money, how to communicate (this is huge!!!) about things that make us uncomfortable. We learned how to fight in a productive way. We learned how to express how we REALLY feel and ask for what we need. We learned how to be HAPPY regardless of financial circumstances. We became partners.

    Once we really had healed our relationship AND built upon the foundation, we decided to have a baby! And we moved to Jersey to be closer to my family and save money. We also got checks for money we had been waiting a year to receive from a commercial he did and we recently paid my sister back in full and paid down a lot of our debt. I’m so glad it happened, and I’m SUPER glad we didn’t break up over it, because that was definitely on the table at one point. But we saw it through, and now we have plans to have 3 more babies and buy a house 😀

    • Oh Michelle, I could not love this more. Congrats to you and J for having the courage to stay with it through the rough times. Sending you all so much love.

    • Emily

      Thanks for sharing this! Nice to meet you, I might be that one person in the anonymity of the internet who needed to hear it. It really put my situation in perspective. Hope you have a great day.

    • Megan Stewart

      Thank you for sharing! My hubby and I are currently struggling financially, but our marriage couldn’t be better. I’m grateful to have a relationship that people long for, but I hate being trapped in debt. Reading your story reminded me that this time could be a blessing and opportunity to strengthen our foundation further. THANK YOU!

  7. I think the biggest feeling of shame and failure for me was getting a rejection letter from Oxford University, which had been (at that point) a lifelong dream.

    But after a couple of weeks of being sad about it, I found a different University in London and had an awesome experience there. Maybe even better, because I met my amazing partner during that time at University and we’ve been happily together for almost 7 years now.

    It’s easy to attach our self-worth to a failure, but it really is not the case. The outcome does not define your value.

    And since then, I actually tried (twice) and got into MENSA (didn’t give up after the first time, it was so close!), which is pretty cool given that this organisation was started at Oxford University.

    So I feel like I got exactly what I needed.

    Sometimes we’re just in the middle of the story and we don’t know yet that it will turn out exactly the way it’s supposed to.

    Trusting might seem like the hardest thing to do in times like that, but it is trusting (that we’ll find our way) and keeping on going that will make the “failure” into an even better situation/experience. At the end of which, more often than not, we’ll be happy we had tried. No matter the outcome. 🙂

  8. It’s crazy how these episodes line up with my life. I tumbled down my apartment stairs this week, and made a similar decision that I was going to be the kind of person who shakes it off and keeps going. Of course, I also took proper precautions for the minor injuries I had recieved, but I moved forward with my day and made a deliberate decision to keep moving. Within a few days, the only evidence of my tumble was a scrape on my thumb. Knowing that I made a small choice not to let this get in my way made me proud and confident. It was also a wakeup call, because it all could have turned out much worse.

    I think of this experience as a “reset.” It has made me more dedicated to acheving my life’s work because, well, life is short and you never know.

    Thanks for sharing this story, Marie. Amazing episode, as always.

    • Lol Krista, I just fell down my apartment stairs too! I totally hear what you’re saying about it being a wakeup call: I’m sooooo grateful that all I got was a sprained ankle. My partner and I enjoy laughing at me as I hobble around with my homemade cane. I’m finding a lightness and joy in this experience that is really surprising – I think it’s because, like you, I decided that this wouldn’t bring me down and that decision is very powerful!

  9. Ann

    I want to show this to my 11-year-old daughter who is a gymnast. Fear is a wall you come up against frequently in that sport. She hears messages like this from me, but you know kids – she’ll probably ‘hear’ it more clearly out of someone else’s mouth.

    • Isn’t that always the truth Ann? It is for me too. Thanks in advance for sharing this with your daughter 🙂

  10. A nearly identical situation happened when a friend and I were traveling in Thailand together. Two seconds into his very first ride, he realized he was on the wrong side of the road, freaked out, gunned it, and fell over, scraping up the whole side of body. Friendly locals immediately bandaged him up, but he never did get back onto the scooter.

    So I think what I love most about your story is that you’ve turned it into an anecdote to inspire your tribe. THIS, to me, is the lesson here: Each of us has a unique story to tell, and all we have to do is capture it and present it to the world, and we expand our collective imagination. Thanks for sharing!

  11. Laus

    Nice words! The one who can overcome the fear of failure can enjoy the joy of success.

  12. Ann Marie

    I was all dressed pretty to go see my cousin’s brand new baby boy ~ a perfect excuse for a sisters’ day out…..one my way to the car, my sandal caught on a lift in the sidewalk and down I went. I broke my shoulder in four places and my opposite wrist I six…. It was horrendous. The surgeon’s statement was ~ Wow, you really did a good job. Fourteen hours in the ER, a mix up in medical orders that resulted in an extremely painful trip home, and a trip back to the ER within an hour~ resulted in major surgery and week’s stay in the hospital. Not only did I not get to see the baby for six weeks but I had a etsy shop set to open the very next day….needless to say, that was put on hold. Falling was by far, the worst thing ever but it did teach me patience and to not be quite as quick to say that I did not need help. The etsy shop is still going to happen ~ I just have to get through one more surgery on my wrist…. Patience, that is what falling taught me.

  13. This might sound petty but I’m a very awkward person when it comes to guys. I have a lot of guy friends but I never dare make a move to someone i’m interested in. Until one day i said no to my fears and finally confessed to a guy that I liked him. For a couple of weeks we went out, until things went sour. Looking back, I realized how foolish I was and all those crazy things I did for that guy. However, after being so heartbroken, I realized that I shouldn’t regret confessing because it was a brave step for me. And even if it didn’t work out, what I learned became so valuable in my approach to relationships. It was a stumble but I’m still happy that it happened because I learned a lot from that experience. I’ve also proven how brave I could be.

    Thanks for sharing this Marie! <3

  14. Natalie Duvkrans Ahlgren

    I was a divorced single mom and my kids meant everything to me. So I had a job I loved and my kids I loved and I was really happy but I kept on thinking the only thing missing in my life was a man to call my own. So I started to date men and every time I was in a new relationship they all ended as battlefields and all that drama made me feel like a wreck. I didn´t know how to find a good man who saw my worth and I didn´t know what I missed out of, why I seemed to do those same mistakes over again.
    So one day a man came and I really thought he was my hero. (I thought I was searching for a hero to take me to heaven). And I started to become blind when things didn´t go as I planned them. I started not to listen to my guts when he started to call me names and when he said all my friends were weird. When he borrowed money from me I thought he´d pay me back and I totally let him manipulate me in a way I would never have thought I could be manipulated in. I was a strong, independent woman and I never thought it could happen to me that I would ever find myself and my kids in a mess with a psycho I hardly could get away from. But still I was there. I had to use a psychological strategy for how to get out of his house where I´d come to live although I had a fine flat of my own. I planned for a month and said nothing to him. It was the worst thing ever happened to me and I was afraid he´d hurt me or my kids if I said I would leave him. But I did get away and I managed to move far away from him where he would never find me again. At the same time I thought I´ve had enough of men. I accepted I would never find a good man. I understood I was the one who had the problem and that was why I kept on finding terrible men. I understood I was searching for men for the wrong reasons and that in fact, I had never really needed a man to feel complete. I just thought that because everyone else had a partner I should also. But my kids and my job (witch I had to move from after the escape, but soon I found a new) was already enough for me and I just had to figure that out. And when I did so. When I really accepted myself for who I am and started to love myself for being me, that´s when love finally came into my life. And with love for myself, love even brought a man into my life. A man I finally could feel totally free with. Who understood how to love me and with whom I later got happily married to. Not because I needed to get married, but because I wanted to! <3 That´s my story. 🙂

  15. Literal faceplant- 23 miles into a 26 mile trail run. Broke my nose, split my lip, but I didn’t know all that right then. I only knew I was shaken, in pain, and bleeding a lot. I took deep breaths, calmed myself, rinsed off my face with my water bottle, and began moving forward to the finish line- I couldn’t just sit in the woods alone all day! What did I learn? That I have the strength to take care of myself in a scary situation, that I am strong enough to finish a tough challenge, even when it suddenly becomes tougher, and… that it is possible to survive a Monday morning at the office with 2 black eyes and a swollen lip :).

    • I did a total face plant at the end of a 10 k run, a run I have done every year for over 20 years. I was so horrified that I didn’t want to stand back up again, and to make it worse a crowd was gathering around me. As I raised myself up and realized I was still intact with no major injury I started to laugh. I couldn’t help it and everyone around me started smiling and patting me on the back. It wasn’t so horrifying after all. Still don’t know what I tripped over.

  16. “I didn’t want fear to take hold in my bones and start slowly turning me into a person who was scared and small and insecure.” Good for you, Marie! Well-put. Usually by adulthood there’s so much fear solidified in our bones, that trying to live the life of our dreams becomes a constant uphill battle against that embodied programming of feeling small and insecure. That’s why for myself and my clients, I work on releasing the old traumas and that solidified fear from the body. Without this, no amount of mindset work will ever override the body memories. Thank you so much for sharing so candidly and wisely–an awesome courageous move, and certainly applies to business big time.

    For me recently, I’ve been making fast and big breakthroughs, in the last 2 weeks alone– sharing the stage as a speaker with Marianne Williamson, publishing a book, meeting and signing up to work with Mama Gena… I’ve trained myself with my process, combining psychology, yoga, and spirituality, to tolerate the intensity of such leaps. But what happens after (I made a vlog about it last week), is the old body programming activates, all that ancient solidified fear, and the detox process is necessary and can feel pretty rough. I’m now learning to navigate it in gentler, faster, and more effective way, to prevent rubber-band effect into the old “small and insecure” place and sharing with others as I go along. We’re all in the same human boat together.

    Thank you for your awesomeness in your humanness, Marie! So much love! Looking forward to running into you in NYC again <3

  17. I learned a very painful lesson very early on in my career. I was an aspiring CPA who had been incredibly fortunate to participate in a pilot program for interns at a international accounting firm. I thought the beautiful offices and everyone in nice suits was really cool, they treated me much more gently than they did the full time recruits, and I gleefully accepted a full time position. However, when I returned after school and really became part of the team, I realized that I had been star struck as an intern and had not appropriately assessed what I was getting in to. As the prior intern I was supposed to be the superstar of the incoming class, but instead I realized pretty quickly that I hated auditing. And because I hated it, I underperformed dramatically. I was miserable, the partners were upset and confused, and I didn’t know what to do. At the time I didn’t realize all of this, so I tried to work harder and persist, and I did OK but it just wasn’t working. Eventually, I made the right decision to go back to grad school and move on. Looking back, I learned two very important lessons. First and foremost, you can’t be great at something you hate. It just won’t work. You have to enjoy what you do in order to maximize your potential. However, there will also be times in life that you have to just gut it out. Being capable of working hard and fighting through adversity is just as important (or more so) than being passionate. I’d learned the value of hard work from my parents, but there’s nothing like real world experience to hammer the point home.

  18. Goodness Marie! Glad you escaped unscathed! As for me, I haven’t had literal face-plants for a long time but my last one was pretty bad (Broke a tooth, bust a lip etc…was pretty unrecognisable for a few weeks…EEk!). I was 18 and rather stupid. I steered clear from 2 wheelers for a while after that. I must admit I am not totally over it…
    I don’t mind push bikes but the idea of a motorbike instils fear in me!

  19. Marie, first of all I think that you are a beautiful woman with as one says “with fire in your v´belly” (stomach”) As regards having a tumble– 3 years ago I borrowed my brother-in-law`s bicycle to get into the town where he lived, -I was on holiday staying with him, together with my wife. The ride into the town was uneventful, but wow wow, the ride home was not. Before we got out of the town my front brake jammed, and as a result I flew over the handlebars, and landed on my hands and face. The end result being that my spectacles went skew wiff in my face, and I bled a littlle over one eye. Thus I pushed my bike to an optician to get them straightened out. In the waiting room I was the laugh of the town so to speak ! OK I got them fixed and cycled back to his place, told him of my mishap, and then he said quite innocently “Oh I forgot to tell you that the front brake needs mending!” I had of course feared on my way back that I might have another tumble, but as you said “fear has to be conquered immediately” which I did. Of course I was very lucky that there had not been a car or truck behind me, but it taught me to keep my wits about me in future.

    My love to you Marie
    Christopher.

  20. Great video! Love the story! Thanks for sharing!

  21. My intention this month is adopting grounding and wholeness of my parts into my body and energy field. Here’s an example of how my intention got more of my attention:
    The other day, I went to help a neighbor who HAD fallen in her trailer and broken 4 ribs. So hurt! She needed to get clothes under her bed which required propping up the bed with a cane. I did this, and the whole time she was expressing gratitude, the way living alone independent people who rarely ask for help do….Well, I left her to gather her clothes and was looking at her beautiful bird Autobahn bird calendar (a 2012, but she did the math to make it work for 2016), and I heard a big bang of the bed slamming. I flew to help, reacting to support her, but she had only let down the bed by taking the cane prop away. So, in my reaction to my under grounded moment, I tripped over the dog laying in the pathway and flew, ouchie on the shoulders and and arms to catch my fall! Lesson, be in my body, present and attentive to subtle influences rather than reaction to imagined events. Don’t freak out, and jump out of my skin and body! So, I have been anointing my body with Ayurvedic oils, which is wonderful. I’m getting better, and I hope she is too. Also, I carried her a beautiful flower from my daughter’s 16th birthday bouquet and gave it to her before all of that commotion, she called later to thank because it bought her joy every time she looked at it. Yay joy!

  22. This episode is very timely for me. I did have a fall one evening in November, when I was skijoring after a horse, and broke my wrist. I felt the pain but decided it wasn’t so bad I couldn’t continue, so I did, and then also went up on the horseback and galloped so my daughter could go on the skies as well. The next morning it hurt really bad though, and I went to the hospital and got my arm in a cast.

    However, now that the riding lessons are about to begin again and my arm has healed, I sense fear about going back on a horse again. Silly really, since the fall had nothing to do with the horse, it was only pulling me and I fell because of an icy patch. I’ve been hesitant whether I should actually continue, but listening to this episode I realize that I must.

    I do not want to let fear solidify in my bones (that’s a very impressionistic description!), that’s not the kind of person I want to be, and it’s not the kind of life I want to lead. Thank you Marie, for making me realize that.

  23. Very timely! Thank you as always for sharing your heart, stories and wisdom with us. I am embarking on yet another venture for a new product line and brand and I have a total fear of failure on this. I don’t know why. But the slow start I’m seeing isn’t feeding my “need to succeed.” This video though reminded me that my past successes are proof that I can do this and that my fear shouldn’t hold me back. My persistence and “ain’t going to fail” attitude has always served me in the past, so fear, step aside!

    Thanks so much Marie!!!

  24. 3 yrs ago I was snow skiing and was blindsided by a runaway skier. He shattered my left leg requiring surgery. I now have a plate and 8 pins holding my leg together. As a seriously type A person the hardest part was having to keep my leg elevated for 3 full months and not putting any weight on it. It taught me patience, it taught me to ask when I needed help and it taught me to be thankful for my family, especially my wife who took care of me for the 3 months I couldn’t move.

  25. Jennifer Frost

    I have some bruises that I was trying to figure out where I got them from this morning until I remembered the fall I had Sunday. I’m in a community band and we had a concert in the park on Sunday. I’m running late and hiking my big instrument, bulky music stand, large acrylic piece to keep music from blowing in the wind (which I needed it was 25 mph), and the stand for my instrument in a bag that kept sliding down my arm. Just at the moment I thought “oh crap I left my music in the car” and I was almost to the stage and in front of the large crowd that had already gathered for the performance…I fell face first landing on my wrists. You could hear the “oohh” from the seated crowd. I got right up and started gathering my things. A man rushed over and asked if I needed help, which I declined. I put my stuff on stage, went back to car and got music. Had a good (although windy) concert. This was Sunday, today is Tuesday and I am just now feeling my bruises. I am so thankful I did not break anything, especially my hands as they are my livelihood. Of course there have been many metaphorical falls…and getting back up, but I thought this was very timely. Thank you Marie for making me see the lesson in my literal fall this weekend.

  26. Sabine

    Thank you for sharing ! I’ve felt from a horse once and I was laughing because I was lying on my back like a love bug 🙂 and I continued horse back riding.
    We all learned walking by falling, everyone of us!

    Have a nice day!
    Sabine xoxo

  27. Christina

    HAHAHAAHAHA! YES! Marie, this is what im talkin about! and i have a story that really set the tone for me years ago. I live in Canada and I was enrolled in the Royal Canadian Air Cadets – a semi- military organization that was initially intended as a training boot camp for the war. Since there is no war, their focus has changed some – training foundation is now based on Leadership, Discipline, Dress, Deportment, Drill, Drill Instruction, Instructional Technique, Public Speaking & upholding the Standard of Excellence.
    So at summer camp graduation, we had a drill competition & I was the drill team commander. Somewhere in the routine at the big graduation with the Base general and other very high ranking, well respected officer and my parents I messed up!! The whole routine was a mess, they were facing the wrong way and it was all my fault because I called out the wrong commands!! The most devastating part was that we had already WON the drill team competition and we were simply showing off at the graduation.
    I was able to correct myself and the team but it was a DEVASTATING embarrassment in front of ALL those people. I finished the routine, and marched away with my team and I was crying I was so upset. But my WHOLE team was there to cheer me on, tell me I did a great job and it didnt matter cuz we already won!
    The point where I picked myself back up was I went back to my home training squadron and became the best drill team member and commander, went on to direct several winning competition routines and returned to Base as the Basic Training Wing Warrant Officer. I didnt let that horrible incident make me afraid to try again. That’s all I ever did. I kept trying. I wasnt my own worst enemy because it was in the past and all i can do is learn from it. If i can recover from THAT, I can recover from anything.

  28. This story reminded me of what I felt like for 17 years as a single mom with 3 sons! Ha! Lots of time meditating and trying something new when I didn’t know what to do. My best life lessons (and skills) came from that – my babies are my best teachers. I am so much stronger than I ever thought I could be. What a great sharing – thank you for always being true and real with us.

  29. Just have to say Marie, I love your Mara Hoffman dress. It suits you so well!

    And in terms of getting back up… I still am getting back up! I launched a program last year that got 15 beta testers. I was ecstatic! So I went to officially launch and got nobody. Nada. Not one person signed up.
    I went back to regroup my product and my launch… though I didn’t do it right away so it’s dragging itself out, but I’m gearing up for another launch this Feb.
    🙂

  30. Hi Marie, your topic is so timely! I gave my first voice recital in over 30 years on Sunday. I began taking lessons again six months ago. I was absolutely amazed at what my voice teacher was able to bring out in me. My confidence was growing with each session and two days before the recital, I was excited to share the gift of my voice and the songs I had prepared to offer: Imagine by John Lennon and Fields of Gold by Sting. The day came, I meditated and chanted that morning, visualized being relaxed and at ease, happy to sing, did some gentle voice exercises. Then the 15 minute rehearsal with the pianist… and no sound came out of me! I was completely unaware of the tsunami of stage fright that hit the shores of my body. I couldn’t find a note and there was no volume. “What’s happening?!” I said in horror. “There’s no sound coming out of me. I can’t find a note. I sound horrible!” My teacher reassured me, it’s just nerves and you do not sound horrible. I tried again and my voice was so weak and now I was really aware that the fear had sucked all the air out of my lungs and I couldn’t breathe. Now, it’s time for the real deal. I listen to two other vocalists sing beautifully, clear and full voices filled the room. My turn. I stood up and said a few words about John Lennon and asked everyone to imagine him there with us, happy to hear us sharing his gift. I opened my mouth and again the barest of sound issued forth. I could see the 13 year old in me covered in shame and painful humiliation. So, I surrendered into the meekest sound and sang to her in me. Note by note I gave my heart to that place inside that has been buried under the pain of having been denied my musical and creative dreams. When i looked up at the end of the song, my daughter was in tears moved by the song AND moved by me singing. Others were in tears too. And the damn broke in me, crumbling in tears. I was shaking so hard, my friend took hold of my hand and helped me calm down. Okay, time to get back up and sing again! It was a bit easier and my voice was more relaxed and open. Still very soft and the only thing to do in my mind was surrender to what was happening. I sang from my heart to my heart and let go of perfect notes and pitch. When it was done, I heard another musician song writer respond, “Nice!”. When I looked into the faces of everyone’s applause, there were more tears. I did it. I sang. I was part of an afternoon of beauty and love and music that lightened the hearts and minds of everyone there. I wrote to my music teacher and thanked her for her compassion and support. By the way, the musician song writer said I have a really nice voice and invited me to work with he and his wife for the next recital!

    • What a beautiful story! I love the idea of singing to the small scared child inside of you.

    • marilyn haverly

      Anasuya,
      I love your story. I’m a musician and can relate to nerves that can affect a performance in totally unexpected ways. Over the years, I’ve gotten more comfortable with unexpected happenings and realize no human alive who has ever offered the gift of music has been mishap free. I was accompanying a high school musical in a small rural town recently and as there were only a few other musicians in the pit (all of whom were students) my ability to keep the show going was crucial. This was especially challenging because I was a last minute substitute. When I somehow managed to lose my place on a page turn that resulted in stopping the show for a few seconds, I didn’t take it lightly, but I wasn’t devastated. We were all doing our best and I find the best way for an audience to be comfortable is for the performer to stay calm and keep going. At intermission, one of the talented young high school musicians couldn’t believe how calm I’d been. He thought he would have just had to leave the room totally unable to go on. It made me realize that with some age and experience wisdom really does arrive! 🙂 Your calm surrender to the circumstances you didn’t choose warmed my heart. Because of the love for yourself and the music your audience received a special treat! Thank you for sharing.

      Marilyn

  31. Well first let me say that I’m so glad you walked away unscathed for that whip out and so proud of you that you got back on the scooter! “Born To Be Wild!”
    When I was 40, I’m 63, now I left my job as a Youth Care Worker of 8 years to go riding horses, on a working, teaching, horse farm. I hadn’t done much riding but it was a life long dream and I now had the opportunity do this and I was over the moon.
    I was learning how to ride, jump fences, work hard and…most importantly, HOW TO FALL, and get back on that horse!. When I graduated this Equestrian Coaching Preparation Program, I got the Real Estate Award because I covered so much ground!
    The most important lesson I learned was that I had chutzpah, determination and courage though sometimes I was scared s_ _ _less, but I did it anyway and I learned how to control my fear, instead of letting it control me. Every since I was a kid I’ve wanted to overcome my fears and I have continued on that same philosophical path to this day. It’s such an important lesson to learn because, it’s what gets us through life when we experience those really scary things that happen to us all. You become a stronger, compassionate person for it in every way and can be an inspiration to others to work toward fulfilling your goals and your dreams.

  32. Thanks, Marie! Appreciate you sharing your story and this message. Awesomeness. Reading some comments — I really appreciate what others have shared. Amazing vulnerability and beauty.

    I’m not sure what to write or if I should share — I feel like I don’t have a “good enough” story. And maybe that is what I need to share, and it’s okay it’s more general. My scooter crash is that I’ve spent years not raising my hand, speaking up, whatever, thinking I didn’t have anything good enough to share and/or that I’d say the wrong thing and sound stupid. (And then I’d stay stuck in feeling like a failure because I hadn’t spoken up and using that as an excuse to keep not raising my hand or showing up — because I felt ashamed.) I’m (slowly!) learning it’s never to late to speak back up and show up. And if I say something that sounds stupid, it’s okay. We all do (and most of the time, it probably doesn’t sound as stupid as how I think it does in my head!).

    • That’s so brave Robin! I’ve been working on raising my voice for years and am starting to see some major results. I suddenly find myself mingling with strangers, speaking up during meetings, commenting on blogs! It’s worth the work, I promise 🙂

  33. Maria

    Hi Marie and all the community!
    I remember being 13 years old in a new school. My parents changed me from schools in the middle of the year and being the outcast was super challenging to me. During lunch break there was a softball game happening and they needed someone to play, I had no clue how to play and I wanted to fit in, so I accepted and played in front of the entire school. I made a total fool of myself everyone was laughing at me and made fun of me for days! I can’t believe I haven’t talked about that in years but I remember being strong and I kept my head high. I also laughed at myself but in a way that circumstance built my personality. I became fearless and actually popular, because people saw I didn’t care what others thought about me.

  34. Hmmm…and what if you had become scared, small and insecure about driving the scooter that day? You would still be a valuable asset to this world! and then you could have learned the lesson of being unconditionally self-loving, even when you give in and take the passenger position. Sometimes, fear does lodge in…if the trauma is truly immense. I guess that word, small, really got to me. I have fought that judgment in my own life…for a long time.
    Just sayin’…

  35. Amr Gaber

    I repeated a test three times as every time i do this test fail, i insist every time to succeed
    and thank god eventually i passed from the whole diploma.
    thank you so much marie for you great vedios

  36. Ginny

    Marie and Team,

    You are a gem! Thanks for today’s video. The timing couldn’t have been more perfect. I just got off of an early morning call where we decided to shutter a tech project I’ve been working on for nearly 2 years. A very, very well funded competitor beat us to market with a near mirror image of what we were building. At best, we would look like a “me too” service at launch.

    So, why share those details? Well, I think one of my biggest takeaways is MY BUSINESS GUT WAS RIGHT!! It WAS a really elegant approach to solving an enormous problem AND it was (very honestly) a billion dollar idea!!

    Whether or not I pursue tech again or if I move into a different type of business, I want to anchor the memory of this day in the knowledge that I can trust my business gut. #priceless

  37. Shivam Singhal

    All the way from India, I am pursuing my research in number one ranked National engineering institute, here I am participating in intra hostel sports (cricket). I was a good bowler and played many big tournaments but now playing after years of gap, I am not as good as I was earlier and not sure whether I will be playing in future in same tournament or not. I sometimes feels demotivated after seeing other how well they are playing as once I was among them in my early days but I am not same and not performing upto the mark 🙁

  38. Mimi

    I’ve fallen literally more times than I care to admit.—- Falling off of an active volcano in Guatemala while children and tourists in flip-flops climbed it just fine comes to mind. The physical falls are easier to get up from because they don’t make me doubt myself, just my ability as a beginner, which I know I can improve on.
    However, my metaphorical falls – the emotional and psychological ones have left me will much deeper and paralyzing fears. What if you do have fears that have seeped in to your bones and hardened there? What do you do with pain that has calcified in you and takes a tremendous amount of time and hard work to unpack in order to mover forward?

    • Hi Mimi,
      I can hear what you’re saying. I’ve fallen so many many times, physically and metaphorically, and often very publicly in front of the same people. So many times that it feels like people expect me to fall, to fail. I know in my mind this actually isn’t true, and that worrying about other people’s expectations is very futile … yet I still work hard all the time to overcome the failures I’ve internalized. I think it’s what you said, it’s hard work and slowly rehabilitating those lost ‘muscles’ of moving forward and taking risks with fresh curiosity. Small small steps. At least that’s what I tell myself.

    • Felicia

      Hi Mimi,
      I wonder if we ‘climbed’ the same Guatemalan volcano range. Although I didn’t fall, I remember being highly embarrassed as I thought that I was really fit and had started the trek at the front of the group. But for some reason I couldn’t get traction on the sandy slopes and end up not only at the back of the group, but flopped out on the ground. Eventually I did manage to get to the top, only to meet with the rest of the group for 5 minutes before we all had to come back down again! My ego may have been bruised, but the lesson to me was that whatever happened, I did it!

  39. As I was riding my bike, I heard music coming from a church…A concert was about to start and all the people were outside….because I looked sideways to see/hear the music, my wheel hit the sidewalk and I tumbled overtop my bike handles and rolled on the sidewalk in front of all these people….A mod of men and women came to my rescue. I was not hurt and I thanked everyone and started laughing and they did too. All were relieved that I was ok! I was actually grateful for all the help and nurturing…I was not shamed or embarased.

  40. Rona Bennett

    OMG the same thing happened to me in high school! My dad bought me a moped and we were so excited that I jumped on it and promptly rode into a wall. After that we decided I should practice more, so we walked over to the cemetery near by because “at least I couldn’t kill anybody there” (my dad’s words) and I practiced till I could ride well enough to get around on the mean streets of Honolulu. But I’m so glad my dad made me get back on. My mom was terrified but he knew I could do it. That made me believe I could too.

  41. My divorce 10 years ago was tough. I quite literally fell down and couldn’t get back up for a few months after that. Like you I asked myself, “Am I dead?” I felt like I was dying at times but no I wasn’t dead. Once I realized this, I slowly started moving in the right direction. I focused on ME. I focused on improving myself and getting to know who I was. What makes me tick? What do I really want in life? Now I am so blessed to be in the happiest marriage ever. I look back and realize that everything happens for a reason. You fall and stumble for a reason. It is an opportunity to grow. You do not grow when everything is fine and dandy. You grow when times are tough. Get back up, dust yourself off, reflect, and keep going!

  42. It’s nothing major but this reminded me of the last time I did karaoke. It was a friend’s birthday party and though I normally don’t sing I’ve decided that as much as possible I want to be a participant in life rather than an observer (sort of like being a driver vs a passenger). So I sang a song and it went terribly – I didn’t know the words as well as I thought and had a hard time with the key. I felt really discouraged and sulked for a little while afterwards. But then I decided that I didn’t want to leave the evening on a sour note. So I put my name in again – this time for a song that I knew really well – and rocked it. And knowing that I can confidently sing in front of strangers (most of whom are better singers than me) makes me feel pretty fearless.

  43. For me, the worst falls are the ones you don’t see coming.
    I suppose all of them are a surprise, but as an artist/ photographer, I can be my own worst critic – always wanting to be the one to at least be prepared for any ‘fall’.
    One year at the very beginning of starting my business, I shot a wedding and afterwards was super hard on myself. I was distraught with all the ways I could have done better etc. After delivering the photos, the couple was emotional with joy and raved and raved! That same year, after shooting another wedding, I was so proud of my creative work. I felt amazing at what I had captured. But after about a week of delivering the photos, I got a smack-in-the face letter from the couple about their disappointment (some good feedback) but mostly negative. All I could focus on was how I had failed. It hit me in the face like a brick sidewalk and took the breath out of me.
    I wish my response had been better. I took a break from weddings and didn’t get right back up. After some time, I faced the reality of what I needed to do to get better.
    It was so painful, but I needed to push through.
    Even writing this now, I can see residual effects of what it did to me. And being able to write this now is very therapeutic.
    It wasn’t easy embracing my sensitivity, but I now see how it serves me as an artist.
    And I am continuing to learn how to just pull up my big girl panties and stare fear in the face!

    • I sure can relate to that! It is hard to take criticism but you have chosen to use it to make your work better (hard work). Thank you! Your comment encourages me to do the same.

  44. The year I lost everything it felt as though I’d had the wind knocked out of me. You know that feeling? Among other things, it was a lesson in humility. I had to start all over again at the age of 55 with nothing but one client and a car. I even had to rely on the kindness of others for a place to stay.
    During that time I learned two things:
    1) When you experience great loss, you have to reach really deep
    to find your way through to the other side, but you learn lessons
    that will serve you well for the rest of your life.
    2) And then the obvious, ‘everything isn’t everything’. Usually, it’s just ‘stuff’: a car, a boat, a house, a sofa, some clothes, or perhaps a loved one.
    But life goes on. I have more empathy and a better understanding of the life I want to live including what’s really important to me. I’m still learning. Hopefully I’ll never stop. And hopefully, each day I’ll move closer to my authentic self and all I’m meant to be.

  45. Lol . . . your story resonates strongly with me Marie, and way to go getting back on!
    My twin sister did the same thing once on a motorbike and I did it on a mountain bike – but on about 5 separate occasions before someone cycling behind me noticed that I was pulling my front brake, hence flying over the handlebars. Talk about a slow learner but in good Sagittarian fashion, I love to exercise in the great outdoors, laugh about it often and warn everyone I know who starts cycling! Perhaps it’s easier for me to swallow because my husband was a professional superbike racer for 9 years (back in the day) and has raced motorcycles for decades, having about 70 broken (now healed) bones to show for it. He teaches me daily that everything is relative, also being 10 years older, which keeps me feeling forever young, with plenty of room to make mistakes 🙂

  46. The almost same thing happened to me! I fell off a scooter while I was giving it a test ride…. but I took A. I chose to be weak and to tell myself that I am not good at driving / riding and to allow people to make fun of this weakness…. for a long time.

    Thank you so much! Thank you, Marie, for sharing this and giving me the other option.

  47. Perfect message for today. I did a metaphorical face-plant last night. Teaching a calligraphy course and told the three lefties that my technique was leftie friendly which it turned out not to be for them!! These people are my friends and I felt like I had failed them. But, today I figured out how to make it work for them, ordered new supplies, emailed apologies and hope this will be a good experience for all of us at the end of the course. Thanks Marie, you are an encouragement to me!

  48. Thanks Marie, glad you were okay! My problem isn’t so much falling, it’s fear of putting myself in a position that I could fall. So I’ve been holding myself back for years. I’m the version of you doing the slow and steady safety test-drives up and down the side street on your scooter. Every once in a while I’ll break out onto the open road and feel the wind in my hair, but something always pulls me back to the side street. I’ve said for a long time that I think I’m more afraid of success than I am of failure. Been there, done that…it’s familiar. Sustained success, though? That’s a scarier place to live. Thank God for a new year and that silly dividing line of January 1st for making changes. I’m making a conscious effort to put myself in uncomfortable situations in the name of growth. Already this year I’ve met several new people and because of those interactions, I’ve experienced moments of exhilaration, like I was driving in the fast lane! I want more of those life living moments! I see so clearly now that it’s a risk/reward deal, and life can be so much sweeter than I’ve let it be. Thanks for the reminder that I’m on the right track… or scooter!! xoxo

  49. Colby Thompson

    Marie,
    I have been there!!!! You are such an inspiration to us all!!! Keep on scooting!
    Love you, Colby

  50. Being an actress, my industry is all about hope and rejection. After a rough audition I was feeling awful. All the “why am I here, what am I doing” pity talk. But as I’m walking out of the casting office I get a call from my agent about another audition that day and she asked if I could do it. The fear definitely wanted me to say no but I took a deep breath and said yes. Then she told me it was in the same building I just exited. No time to let the “fear sink in”. I went in and like a professional I did my job and turns out, I booked that job!

  51. My biggest issue isn’t coming back from setbacks in my professional life, it’s coming back from setbacks in my personal relationships. I am a peaceful person that likes harmonious relationships, but sometimes it makes me a pushover. When I finally do push back and make myself heard, others see it as me acting irrationally or out of character when really I am just picking my battles. I am working so hard on it this year because I’m beginning to realize that I end up losing a relationship because I don’t come back from that fight and make that relationship solid again. I try to do so much “on my own” with a mindset that I can succeed without anyone’s help that I forget how much easier life is when I have supportive people around me- but still hold good boundaries with them. Definitely going to start relating how I recover from falls in the physical and professional world to how I recover in my personal relationships! <3

  52. Hi Marie,
    In 2004 I started what was to become a very successful business. And then this:

    Becoming an Insta-Mom – after 42 years of living life with no other being dependent upon you for survival, suddenly adopting and becoming co-responsible for a 5 week old baby.
    +
    Insta-Divorce – Being rendered almost unable to function for nearly 3 years upon receiving an unexpected request for divorce.
    +
    Single Parenthood – and all that that entails.
    +
    Moving home 3 times
    +
    Relocating the business 3 times (plus multiple mini-moves within one building.)
    +
    The Great Recession – The worst recession since the 1930’s.
    =
    Death by Suffocation – Feeling caged with the weight of 5 employees, 15 sales reps and the responsibility of a multi-million dollar business pressing down.

    I could. Not. Breathe.

    A friend deftly pointed out that I did, in fact, create, run, own and successfully sell that multi-million dollar international business with the above equation occurring simultaneously. (While being recognized for two successive years as one of the top 100 fastest growing businesses in the San Francisco Bay Area.)

    Huh. Perspective. I had never quite looked at it that way.

    Honestly, I never really recognized what it was that I had created – it was a successful multi-million dollar international business that was valuable enough to be sold to another company. I never gave myself credit for having employed all of those people and giving them the opportunity to support themselves in the way that they chose. I never saw just how much I had accomplished and learned.

    And I certainly never recognized that I did all of that while having the enormous emotional toll that the above equation took occurring simultaneously.

    We see things. And we don’t see them. Even when they’re right in front of us. In plain sight.

    Sometimes it does take eagle vision. Another perspective. The wise reflections of a loving friend. To help us see what we are. And who we are. And how much strength we do have.

    Again, given the choice to do it all over again, would I? Jesus. Not like that.

    But today I do have a new perspective. And gratitude. And forgiveness. And love.

    Today, all we can do is to have a dream, do the footwork and trust that we will have the courage and strength to show up in the service of that dream. We won’t know what is ahead. But just for today, that vision and future can look far brighter with the compassionate perspective of the rear view mirror clearly in focus instead of the blur of that of the unbearable weight of the past.

    It’s time to get back up again.

  53. I experienced this experience with a dromedary in the desert, I literally passed over and the dromedary. t fled, I avoided being trampled. Everyone was frightened around me, a real waterfall. Not too much damage and so much better because the conditions were just rough in the middle of the desert, far from everything.
    Same conclusion I went up on the following time, everyone was surprise, and I had an extra with the guide who made me go up and down crazy dunes, what definitely make me overcome any fear.
    Never let yourself be defeated by a failure, start again to succeed taking into account the advice, and understanding the mistakes.

  54. Samira

    Good Morning!

    Thank you for sharing this story. It is very helpful for me. I can relate to it in every walk of life literally. First time, I started cooking, I burnt all the food. My family was supportive, they ate the burnt food anyway. Then I cooked the same thing the next day. It was much better. I was surprised that I got a lot better in one day.

    I was in Morocco in 2000 when I started learning driving. The third day, I took a sharp left turn with accelerating speed and the car hit the street light pole drastically. Head lights were broken. Bonnet cover was smashed. Nobody was physically hurt. My father had to bear some serious financial loss. I was shaken and lost the confidence. Good thing is that my trainer was supportive and he was ready to continue the training. I drive today too but it is still terrifying for me. Although, I have been driving for years but I cannot make the fear disappear completely. Good news is that I have gained much confidence too. Fear is there but it is not controlling. It is just dormant.

    Thank you for sharing stories with full of insights.

  55. Candis Angelene

    Thank you Marie! A few months ago I auditioned for a musical and well, I face-planted, shaking like a leaf in front of one of the top producers in my country. Needless to say, there was no call-back and for a little while I was tempted to give up on my dream. Guess what? I haven’t given up and somehow there’s a little voice inside me that tells me to have faith in myself and my desires. Here’s to the next audition, I’m getting right back on my scooter…

  56. Kate TW

    I love this story and you called out a brave part of myself that I can sometimes forget is there. Fear of driving in general is real for me, having been in a bad accident with my mom as a child, so I didn’t get my license until I was in my mid-20’s. Then as I was living in NYC for years I hardly drove. As you were telling your scooter story, I imagined putting myself in your shoes and climbing onto the back of my partner’s scooter. Would I have had the courage to choose B? It is good to remember the times I have made that choice so that I can practice it, like the time I was learning to drive stick and I gunned the jeep over a cliff-like ditch and into a giant hole, but was also miraculously unhurt, and I did eventually learn stick and motored around alone and off road in a big old flatbed truck. The feeling of taking a risk, falling, and getting back up amidst fear and shame absolutely translates into business decisions, and linking those in my mind to a story of a physical fall and rebound really helps me to be clear around those. Your story also reminds me that more often than not, there are more people around willing to help than to laugh and point fingers, and that often it is just up to me to direct and accept the help that is offered to achieve my desired goal. Thank you!

  57. Roxanne Parsons

    I’m reminded of Thomas Edison, who failed many times in the creation of the light bulb. When asked how he felt about “failing” so many times, his response was classic: “I have found 99 ways it does not work. All I need is one that works.” He found it, and that light bulb is still burning today.
    At 73, I have come to view failures as an opportunity to find a way that does work.

  58. I crashed hard on a dirt bike (my first attempt to ride one) in front of my 7 year old son. Dazed and bleeding, all I could think about was the message I would send if I walked off the track. So, I chose at that moment to get back on not only for myself, but to be an example to my son. He’s 15 now and that “fall” is something we talk about every now and then to remind ourselves about how important it is to get up after you fall or fail and keep going.

  59. BARRI

    LOVE YOUR DRESS!!

  60. This story is so sweet! Well done, Marie!

  61. oh goodness! I was in the airport at Rio de Janeiro with my business partner. We were romancing a new client and vendor who owned a few hotels where we wanted to book our retreats. It was hot, steamy summertime, I was wearing a something flowy dress. We were all four talking on one of those pedestrian belts inside the airport. I was standing facing backwards to talk more easily. You guessed it, the pedestrian belt ended, and i dumped sass over teakettle, showing all in the process! so embarrassed, and picked myself up, laughed heartily and kept right on going. We got the contract. 🙂

  62. Hi Marie, thank you for your video today. I had a BIG fall once… skydiving! It was my first jump, (solo, not tandem like they do now) and it turned out they let me out of the plane too late and I missed the drop zone by about three miles. On the way down, I managed to avoid some trees, but when I landed on a hillside, my feet popped out from under me, I flipped over backwards, breaking my tailbone, and rolled down the hill into a bunch of yucca bushes. I was able to walk away, but continued to have issues with my back. So I started seeing a chiropractor, then an acupuncturist. I began learning about healing, nutrition and spirituality. This has become a life long pursuit, and I’ve gone on to also become an energy healer. I had always qualified that incident as something bad that had happened to me. But when I realized that it was the catalyst that put me on the path I’m still on today, I just had to be grateful for it. So these days, when something happens that I didn’t want to happen, I just remember my big fall, and patiently begin looking for the ‘silver lining’!

  63. Vane

    This article came to me right at the right time.

    I am from Argentina, and about six months ago I started to work in a new company. The thing is I have to travel sometimes. My first trip was the first week in this new job, I had to go to Bogotá for a week and I felt very nervous, I actually had panic attacks and also wanted to call and cancel everything because that feeling was so overwhelming and the anxiety was so big that the whole thing became a monster to me.
    Finally after crying and having a really bad stomach I went to Bogota and stayed there all week thinking it was easier than I imagined, I actually enjoyed the time there a lot and I also really liked the place and the people I met .
    After that I went on a couple more trips, but short trip very close, like Chile or Brazil.

    Now six months later I have to travel again to another place, and I am going to stay alone one day in this trip, and I do not know why I have this kind of mixed emotions again. It’s like a roller coaster where sometimes I say to myself “yes, you’re going to have a great time!” And sometimes “Oh my God, and if it something goes wrong, you can not do this!”
    I really do not understand why I have to go trough all this process again, when I already traveled before.

    But the thing is that I feel that if I do not go, I’ll open the door to fear to stay with me, maybe forever, so I’m trying to have positive thoughts about this and let life, God and the Universe take care of Which I can not control.

  64. Meghan

    Okay well first of all I have had some literal adult public wipeouts that were pretty embarrassing. But as 2017 begins I have been paralyzed by a figurative adult wipeout. I started an organic sustainable skincare line in May 2016. My goal and intention for 2017 is to focus on the retail aspect and getting my product into holistic spas. I am comfortable in almost any social setting, but I have NEVER put myself out there like this. Do I call and make an appointment? Do I say ‘Hi my stuff is great and effective try it?’ And then what if they don’t? What if every store on my list says no?….But as I write this out I realize none of them will say ‘YES’ if I never muster up the courage and make those calls and put myself out there.

    • Chelsea - Team Forleo

      Exactly! Love that re-frame Meghan! You can do this 🙂

  65. Dear Marie – Yes, yes and more yeses to falling and getting up again no matter how painful. After my first book was published I had a pretty large reading scheduled in a swanky bookstore. It is unbearably hot outside, and the air-conditioning was blowing tepid air. In 5 minutes, everyone left. I was distruaght and then a few brave people started up for the front of the room, took off whatever they could to be decent and I invited everyone to sit on the floor. In came a fan and I shouted over the noise. Everyone laughed and wanted me to jut talk about getting ebook published. After a gallon of iced tea, we exchanged business cards and went out to the heat. I learned that people do pay attention, they want you to succeed and there is ALWAYS a plan-b even if you make it up on the spot. It is still my favorite book signing.

  66. Oh Marie! I would have totally done that too. I so cannot figure out Scooters. Congratulations on getting back on that Scooter, lady.
    Regarding crash and burn failure, I’d have to say it was my very public financial crash/bankruptcy and public self-discovery of my multiple internal selves that has been my most intense.
    And, also created the most growth for me, internally and externally.
    Because I got back up and on the metaphorical scooter again, I’m able to share my wisdom from a far deeper place of understanding AND feel fantastic about who I am and the work I am doing, which you may remember was not always the case for me.
    Thanks for being you, Marie! Keep shining the light, sister.

  67. karz

    the fair of fail in life is not easy I bean true it and the was not a good experience for me at all. thank to this video I wash it made life more interested for me in way I cant even emerging. wen I fall I learn to get back up on my two feet and don’t be a cry baby abort every thing that wen worn in my life. by washing this video I learn how to be a mature In life and I know realise people could make mistake in life so I would like to say I love and enjoyed this video thanks

  68. Timely piece, yall. I recently fell flat on my face ego-wise. A professional situation that I totally misread and seriously “bruised and scraped” emotionally when my view was corrected. BUT, that led me to rethink my WHY and get a different perspective on what I truly wanted, with a 5 yr “plan” that now feels very true and resonates with my SOUL. I probably would’ve kept pressing for that ego-centered work had I not been knocked down. So sitting in gratitude.

  69. The moment that came to my mind was in 1997 during a job I had chalking up the pavement outside at the Marin County Event Center during a Technology Conference for AutoDesk. It was a whole week of record high summer temperatures and dry hot wind and up to 110 degrees for the long weekend and I was working outside all day under one umbrella. I do not do well with extreme temperatures due to the stress tapping me out. So exposure to heat, or cold can rob me of basic functioning in a flipped second. The whole project was touch-and-go from the beginning due to the last minute request and many changes by the client that happened over five days prior to the weekend event. I grew up near the event center and knew the patio surface was a combination of polished cement and smooth agates in cement, not a good surface for chalk paintings. In order to pull off this job, I sewed up and prepared a ready to hang canvas to put on the ground, in order to create a colorful image in front of 1,500 attendees to wow their eyes with art in action when they came outside on their breaks from computer technology instruction and training. Against all odds I was actually there on time with everything I needed. Yet, a four-hour power outage in the area delayed my use of an overhead projector to finish the final layout of the lettering my clients chose for the top and bottom of the canvas. So I was behind in finishing coloring in the image. Fear surged many times with untrue stories, about the whole thing being impossible, touting the unlikelihood that I could pull it off in time or well, or at all in the heat, and it would be safer to simply pass on the project than try and fail (or let anyone down with my best effort not working). If I were weak willed, I might have quit many times. But I was insistent and strong, repeatedly, as if getting over the same fear hurdle was my lesson all week, especially during the weekend. I kept taking inventory about what was actually true in that moment as a way to counter my fears and run a reality check. And I kept insisting on moving forward however I could, even if finishing seemed incredibly unlikely. I kept counter-posing ‘what-if’ thoughts that were positive. “What if miraculous forces came to my aid, and helped me complete this even if it seems impossible?!” Which was much better than quitting. It was a long sweaty week of physical strain to be in the heat, performing as entertainment against a deadline. By midday Sunday when the event ended, I still needed to be outside the rest of the afternoon in the heat for many more hours to complete the project. The set up crew began taking down all rented items and packing up booths. I did not notice crew near me because I was focused on my painting. In one smooth move, a guy approached, collapsed the umbrella and walked away with my shade. The sudden heat of direct sun on my skin shocked my system and my strength bottomed out. Exhaustion took over, and I fell short of negotiation abilities in that moment and instead cried in utter despair. I knew no umbrella meant I would be be toasted by the sun for the next many hours. I felt shame for losing my composure was too embarrassed to speak and protest in a high-pinched vocal whine while upset. Yet I could not bear to be defeated during my final stretch. That fierce protective insistence led me to recognize my this moment was my only opportunity to renegotiate the removal of that umbrella and it required I get my sore exhausted body to move, to stand up and chase after the workman carrying the event crew’s umbrella away. The shade it supplied saved me from direct sun exposure all weekend. I had to have it as long as possible, so I caught up to him and told him my request, which he was unwilling to accommodate at first. So I restated my case more desperately insistent. I begged and pleaded, and cried, “Please let my shade be the last item you pack!” He finally agreed, even though he figured he would get in trouble. The umbrella kept me shaded for the next four hours, leaving just two more sunny hours before I finished. Those last two hours were much easier sun hours to endure and I could see the end of my project was near so the time I was in direct sun, although still excruciating, it was much less daunting than direct sun for six hours. I completed my project sprayed it with a fixative, and slid the long dowels into the sleeves I had sewn in, screwed on the finial ends, carefully rolled it up, with a protective layer of plastic sheeting and drove over to their building and hung it from their second floor beams in their entrance lobby with rope I had brought. My chalk on canvas painting remained there for over ten years.

  70. As a gymnast, diver, skier, and soccer player, single Mom, and business owner, I have done MANY “face-plants” — both literally and figuratively! What I’ve learned over the years is that you have to pick yourself up, find a way to forgive yourself for the mistake (this was hardest for me when I messed up as a Mom and had channeled my inner Linda Blair!), and move on, integrating what you learned in the process as you do so. I still wrestle with the fear of failure — esp as I am about to publish my 1st book & step out into a new biz venture! — but I no longer let it own me or allow it to keep me from playing it big. How? By keeping my eye on my mission — there are 1.5M nonprofits in the US and the vast majority of them don’t have enough $ to move the needle on the social problems they’re trying to address. As a nonprofit fundraising consultant, it’s my job to show them how to get their share of the pie!

  71. Alixandrea

    I feel like I’m in the middle of wiping out right now TBH. If I don’t have either a job or experience a miracle in my business, I’m going to literally run out of money next month. Truly scary times. I must say, Marie, I’m a little jealous that you had someone there who gave you the ‘painstaking detail’ of how to get back up from your fall. I really feel like that’s what I need, as I’m currently drowning in an ocean of ‘DO THIS THING NOW!!!’ None of which is getting results because I don’t know how to be methodical about it.

  72. I understand perfectly what you were talking about. Years ago, on a motorcycle ride up to Upper New York with a motorcycle group after turning a corner the bike went offside into a ditch. Luckily I was not hurt , just s little shaken and the bike was not damaged. Everyone was nervous and thought I should just get in the car because some were following us and someone else will ride the bike home.
    I was so fearful after that , but my pride wouldn’t let me not get back on , I supposed because I was a women and didn’t want people to think I couldn’t do it. I always remember that phrase, ” if you fall off the horse you got to get right back on and ride”. So , I got right back on and every time I came to a curve, my instructor’s advice ran through my head, “lean into it”, he would always say and after about an half an hour the fear was gone and the courage was back and I was back up to speed with the rest of the Riders.
    This was a valuable lesson and I take it through my entire life and when I took my business full-time, I was fearful of all the unknown, will I make it ,will I be able to survive, will I be able to make it work. So, sitting at my very good job one day I decided to just jump in with both feet I handed in my resignation and walked out the door and never look back. That was 2004. It has not always been easy and there has been some very lean times but I am still here and right now we are pushing forward with great projections and we still have a ways to go but I do not regret for one minute the choice that I’ve made, even though I still get fearful at times.

  73. Kim

    Grrrrl!!! Yes! And I love the “You’re not the person who fell, but the person who got up and tried again” reframe – woo hoo! I once had a super powerful dream about this VERY thing and it’s published in Chicken Soup for the Soul, Dreams and Premonitions and called “Take the Leap,” which is the name of my coaching business for that very reason! Not sure if links can be in these comments, so I’ll put it in a separate comment just in case and anyone who wants to read the story can do so by finding the book on Amazon and taking a “peek inside” and searching for Take the Leap or Kim Childs. Here’s to leaping, falling, and getting back up!!

  74. Love a little Marie in my day. Thanks Marie for this story and this message. Love it.

  75. My divorce 10 years ago was the biggest “fall” I’ve experienced. Divorce is one of the most public types of failure — it feels like you’re shouting to the world, “I made a really bad choice 15 years ago, and now I’m turning my entire life upside-down in order to fix it! Yep, we screwed this up big-time!”

    Emotionally, the process of making that choice was excruciating, and slogging through the paperwork forced me to dig deep into my reserves every day. But I knew I’d be so much better off once I got to the other side, and I am! I never looked back, because it was absolutely the healthiest thing for me to do, and the best example of taking care of myself that I could give to my two daughters.

    Shortly after the divorce, and then battling a little run-in with cancer, and then leaving my secure teaching job to start my own business, I got a tattoo of a damselfly on the back of my left shoulder. The significance of damselflies (similar to dragonflies) is that they live half of their lives underwater, avoiding the light and without wings, and the other half in the open air, staying near water but flying freely and enjoying the sunshine. That’s what divorce gifted me: a second life full of freedom and light. (And a new career as a full-time artist.)

    Now at 18 and 24, my daughters have experienced the crazy-making that their dad can inflict on those closest to him. They understand why I needed to divorce him to save my emotional health. Hopefully they will use that lesson when making their own choice of a mate. That will make my “fall” doubly — no, triple-ly — worth it!

  76. Kim

    Grrrrl!!! Yes! And I love the “You’re not the person who fell, but the person who got up and tried again” reframe – woo hoo! I once had a super powerful dream about this VERY thing and it’s published in Chicken Soup for the Soul, Dreams and Premonitions and called “Take the Leap,” which is the name of my coaching business for that very reason!

  77. Thanks Marie…what a great reminder! It’s so easy in business and life to stay down and not push forward. Looking forward to choosing “get up” and “push on” much more this year!!

  78. Amanda

    Hi Marie
    I created a musical a few years ago and taught children for 3 school terms prior. I had a family of kids that were fighting and a whole lot of obstacles or not go to plans on the day/day before show. Anyway the those kids were basically fighting, reluctant to participate, and some others were upset/crying because of this. As I tried to discipline this the end result was that those kids walked out on the show and only left a few in it, who decided to leave also. I had 4 days of shows to show up for 2x performances a day. I did one show solo with the help of a couple of young girls a support person found. And so it went, end of show, stories to tell sponsors/all the guests who attended etc. I felt so bad, though my sponsors were amazing and totally understood. A big learning lesson for me and I’m still going through it though. last year I decided to boost my training with more dance to finish to the top of my exams to then be a qualified teacher. That didn’t go so well with publishing my book as I was maxed out with that. However I am starting a new school this year, either one out of two, one I get to learn from home, which could be better than with teenagers and the other was with a school, depends on living areas etc. I was encouraged to do this by the police as the families turned it all around onto me and it got very nasty with horrible letters being sent to me from the familes, plus charges been made. It really was a horror story with a great lead up year prior ie journey, not destination. And I was able to survive on my teaching, art, dance, music and singing during that time. In many ways it was a success and of course charges were dropped as most of it was a pack of lies. Thanks for listening, it might have some inspiration for some of you. And I need to love and forgive my self more, with oodles of compassion; plus release that fear, replace with love.

  79. On vacation too!
    My boyfriend and I were staying at a FANCY villa in Indonesia, along with about 20 of his friends and coworkers, it was basically a business trip but we had the night off. I was last to be ready to head out to dinner. They’re all waiting for me to get in the van and glance my way as I’m heading over (in my heels). I don’t notice a fish pond in the middle of the walkway (why would they put it there anyway!!!???) and literally collapse right into it. The pond is big enough for my entire body to be underwater and I’m shocked and don’t know what to do. Immediately I realized I had NO choice but to get up, brush myself off, change my clothes and redo my makeup in a hurry. Once they knew I wasn’t injured, everyone was in tears of laughter. I started laughing, then laughed until my cheeks hurt, and was first out to grab a drink at dinner! I think everyone was surprised that I wasn’t too embarrassed to still go out to dinner with them. But I think they were also impressed or maybe inspired that I could actually pull that off. 😉

  80. A Saffer

    Oh yes, I have fallen while skiing, complete wipe out, hit my head (I had a helmet on, thank goodness) and laid there while my terrified children and husband came over to make sure I was still alive. I think I put on a brave face for my children, I do not want them to grow up as fearful or timid people, I want them to try everything and make those decisions for themselves. I then proceeded to get to the health store for arnica tablets and gel and came back to ski the rest of the day. A few days later I experienced total body pain and had to get massage therapy, chiropractic help, and acupuncture for months after. What an ordeal. But the getting back up, not letting anything knock you down is a way of drawing power and courage from yourself and knowing, unless you are really hurt, nothing can hold you back.

  81. One of my fondest memories goes back to a trip we took as a family to San Antonio Texas. Beautiful place to visit, wonderful tourist town, has lots to do; but when we visited it was hurricane and flood season, and, it was flooding. My family knows I don’t care about water getting in the way much, my figuring is, we can have fun dry, we can have fun wet, let’s have fun. But that doesn’t always work out so well with others. On the third day of the week my family was really tired of malls and covered walking areas, they wanted to see something cool, so, the decision was, let’s see if the caves are open. These are gorgeous caverns and as you wait outside for the tour guide the giant poster says “Be sure to hold the hand rail, floors can be slippery.” My daughter saw the sign, and knowing “Mr. Rugged,” your writer, said, “Dad be careful, hang on to the railing.” Mr. Rugged quipped back, “I don’t…” and before I got, “need to,” out, I was flat on my back, and the ladies behind us were saying, “look at that poor old man.” Mr. Rugged had to grin and bear it, his back hurt; but the tour must go on, and he’s Mr. Rugged! Now, that’s a painfully funny picture.

  82. I had my first ever Muay Thai fight last November. I got my ass whooped!! I felt so humiliated that I almost convinced myself to stop training. Luckily I did learn from my mistakes which were around having not allowed myself to fully engage in the emotions I felt through the fight camp training. So many times I wanted to scream, shout or throw a glove across the room, but I sucked it up for fear of looking weak. This resulted to my mindset not being 100% when I stepped through the ropes.
    Thankfully, I got back to training and am now more in love with the sport than ever. I will definitely fight again!! 👊🏻

    • Kristin - Team Forleo

      Good for you, Georgina! It would’ve been easy to walk away when you felt defeated, but you stuck with it and that’s definitely something to feel very proud of!

  83. Natalie C

    I was really moved by this post because it does touch on the “impostor” video as well. I recently lucked into a job that challenges me daily and surrounds me with a lot of really qualified and talented individuals. There are times when I feel that I stumble more than most but I realized asking many questions has prevented me from making the same mistakes. Because I put myself out there and act human, more people learn to specify what their needs are and come to me for future support. Which is team work at its finest- one life skill at a time.

  84. Candra Adams

    As for falling literally, I was studying dance in college, but would fall every where i went (except on the dance floor). So I got used to it. I was just always so interested in getting where i was going I didn’t pay attention to my feet and how they were getting me there! So I stopped being embarrassed about that. But, for metaphorically, I always considered myself the Phoenix) until I got in a relationship (way too long term, as in, two decades) with a man who was always there to encourage me to ‘stay on the ground’, as it were, for my own safety. I recently started realizing he was also there to kick me down in the first place (by getting involved in my endeavors to help me, then finding out everything wrong with them and sabotaging them). This has left me emotionally and esteemly(I know, my word), crippled. Thank you for giving me the courage to get back up, initially, by leaving. I wrote your tweetable down, and am going to read it every day, all day, as I prepare my exit strategy.

  85. I absolutely loved this story because the exact same thing happened to me right in front of the busy Opéra in Paris. Strangers ran from all directions to lift the scooter off of me. I was mortified, but when I got back to California I bought a Vespa. Thank you, Marie, for this beautiful reminder! There are several horses I have fallen off of that it’s time to get back on.

    • Kristin - Team Forleo

      Good for you, Tyler! Getting back on is the hardest part, but ultimately so worth it 🙂

  86. Crystal Olszanowski

    I’ve taken physical tumbles more than a handful of times. Luckily….nobody is laughing harder than ME! No shame here. By then it’s too late! You’ve already fallen! Might as well make it a great story.
    Thanks for the perspective and I’m going to keep coming back for more!

  87. More synchronicity.

    I’ve been laid up due to a similar type of accident as Marie had. But, mine involved a snowmobile rolling on me. Despite the pain from multiple spinal fractures and shoulder tear, I wake up every morning thankful I can walk because I could have easily been paralyzed.
    Ironically I noticed this video after a morning meditation on how this experience was presenting me with lessons to learn and areas for growth. While I can’t really be productive, being on medical leave has allowed me the mental space to do some valuable planning for the business concept which originally brought me to B-School. In a strange way, I think this accident will get me closer to being able to finish my project, which I know can help a lot of people be healthier.
    Thank you for your very inspirational stories. Wishing you all healing (if needed), strength, growth and prosperity.

  88. Oh boy do I know how you feel. Last December I had the same wipe out experience- litterally falling off a stool and breaking my tail bone! It taught me SO much about self-care. I actually wrote about it in Elephant Journal 😉

  89. On Jan 5th during my walk home from work around 1 AM, I was assaulted and robbed two streets away from my apt building. The physical wounds have healed, my belongings mostly replaced, but the fear that weighs heavy on my heart is still present. My job has altered my shift until I’m ready to return to my night shift but I’m worried I might never be able to do so. Walking down that Ave to my apt is a challenge whenever the sun goes down and my greatest fear is that I’ll never feel safe walking alone at night again. By the time I get to my apt my stomach is doing somersaults. What I’ve noticed is that the more I speak about what happened, and the more I walk down that path at night, I feel a little stronger and the fear doesn’t weigh so heavy on me. My goal is to be a bit more aware of my surroundings and continue down that path without letting fear deter me.

    • Kristin - Team Forleo

      I’m so sorry that happened to you, Jessica. That’s terrifying. I’m so glad you’re ok, and I sincerely hope you continue to heal emotionally over time! xo

  90. I have always said that as I get older, I always want to be able to get up off the floor if I fall down, physically (that’s why I keep up my yoga habit) and metaphorically.

    A few years ago, I was a Canadian living in New York City singing for my supper with a pending 0-1 visa. My visa took much longer to be processed that usually because of random security checks and on the advice of my lawyer, I submitted again – only to have the same thing happen. I was scared of living in another country with no real status, and missed out on wonderful professional opportunities because of my lack of visa. One September afternoon, one of my greatest fears was realized. I was stopped at the US border trying to cross back in from Canada with my American boyfriend, and to keep the story short, I was barred from entering that day and the five years following, and charged with immigration fraud, which is essentially a life time ban. My boyfriend and I turned around back into Canada at a loss for what to do next. I knew that this was a very real possibility every time I crossed the border, so in a way I was prepared, but my heart was broken. After a full day of crying, I immediately began to rebuild. Looking back, I am surprised I was able to dust the dirt off so quickly, dissolve my life of 3 years in New York, and begin again, back in my childhood home. Only a few days after I was turned away at the border, I was compiling lists of songwriters and sound designers, emailing them to let them know I was a singer for hire, recently returned to Toronto. Of those many emails, few emailed back. One of them was a sound designer I now often work with, and he connected me with a company that creates children’s music for youtube. After freelancing with them this past year, I signed a contract for a full time position, singing and performing every day for their youtube content. That big opportunity came from a little email at a difficult time that I very easily could have talked myself out of sending. Since coming back to Canada, I have started a successful music business for children, created a long list of clients that I sing for, and now have this new and exciting opportunity to develop.

    My fall was a complete road block, and I had fully walked into it, but I adjusted and became better than I ever thought possible. My American boyfriend became my American husband and now he is a permanent resident of Canada, and we are both learning and growing from that stumble that has altered both our lives. We are up off the ground, and it will be what we make of it!

  91. lizzy

    Ooooo! This is one of those Milestone episodes for me! I am the worst ‘once bitten twice shy’ creature out there. Especially when it comes to embarrassing myself online!!!
    It has taken me years at some points to get back up again after making a blooper on the internet. Thanks again, Marie – this one goes straight to the heart.

    • Kristin - Team Forleo

      Lizzy, I’m so glad this episode resonated with you so much!

  92. Jessica Curbelo

    During the years I have learnt that every fall is an experience and I thank every single experience I have and live. Thanks Marie for shearing!

  93. I really enjoyed your video today because the “fall” I experienced last year ended up being one of the greatest gifts to my life. It literally changed everything for me. Last February, I was diagnosed with Low Ovarian Reserve, a condition that results from a progressively aged ovary and aged eggs in that ovary. I lost one of my two ovaries, when I was 17, as a result of a cyst that grew out and then wrapped itself around the ovary. I had no idea that the ovary removal would have such an adverse effect on my surviving ovary until I was told that my 33-year-old body was harboring an ovary that was in its forties. I was shocked, terrified, and frozen with fear at the idea that I, a very single woman in her mid-thirties, was in a now-or-never situation in terms of motherhood. My sisters and mother immediately helped me out with the financial support needed to get my eggs frozen, but I was also given the grim news that I would be lucky to get even one egg per freezing cycle (most women who undergo egg freezing aim for 10 to 12 per cycle). We moved forward with the first cycle and I did get one egg on that round. I decided to take a break between cycles and to give my body three months to make itself healthier in terms of fertility and, in those three months, I: gained 10 pounds to increase my low BMI, added supplements, stopped working out, and changed my living environment in terms of friends/clients who I chose to be around so that everything about my life was joyful, pleasant, full of ease, and void of stress. Three months later, I harvested 6 eggs, and, due to my weight gain and inability to wear anything in my wardrobe, I also wore my dresses that I had been designing since four years previous to the egg freezing. The more I wore the dresses, the more compliments and encouragement I garnered from friends, family, and just people passing me by on the street. It occurred to me that these dresses bring me joy, they are a tangible celebration of gratitude, and they serve as a chance for me to make something for other people that I know makes them feel good. Since winter of last year, I’ve devoted my free time and the money I earn in my current job to building this dress company. We did a successful Kickstarter Campaign and now we’re focused on bringing the company to the next level. My health failed me and yet it opened up such an incredible path, rich with possibility, that uses my creativity, intellect, salesmanship, and enthusiasm for life. I’m extremely grateful for my “fall”!

  94. I had almost the EXACT same thing happen to me when I was in Bali in ’06!! It was the same thing with the breaks on the handlebars — I was so used to breaks on the pedals. A non-English speaking Balinese man was trying to teach me how to ride and as soon as he got off the bike (he was sitting behind me showing how to work the gas and the breaks…. in Balinese…), I SQUEEZED the handlebars with everything I had bc I got freaked out. I drove my bike into a 5′ deep DITCH — My bike went underneath a HUGE slab of concrete and my arms landed on top of it. Talk about scary! I did not get back on like you did…. I was bleeding and shaken up, but ok. What did I learn from that?? ….how to hitchhike! 😛

  95. Hey Marie, Great video – I guess we both face fear and failure on holiday! The one thing my experience taught me is that it’s perfectly ok (and very normal) to be scared from time to time. In a wonderful world that promotes fearless bravery (as we both do), it’s important not to lose sight of the fact that sometimes you’re just being human. I was fearlessly visiting the US (from Australia) and ended up in the emergency department a fearful, snotty mess! The two can coexist 🙂

  96. I recall a “worst fear” failure when I was working in the ad agency business. I had to present in front of a team of people who were much more experienced than me and I felt I needed to impress them — and my worst fear was losing my train of thought. I didn’t have a track record of losing my train of thought while giving a talk, but for some reason on this occasion it was in my consciousness… and sure enough … right in the middle of my presentation I did lose my focus and forgot what I was saying. My temptation was to run and hide — but of course I couldn’t do that. The only real option was to acknowledge what happened and get right back on course. It still makes me cringe today, thinking about it. I said “I’ve lost my train of thought” and the creative director said “just talk about what you’re talking about!” i.e. Jump In Anywhere. It was so ridiculous, the path back was simply to jump back in anywhere: anywhere on the path got me right back to remembering. I learned an important lesson that day. I learned I could recover from my worst fear by staying in the game. Thanks for bringing it up so I can remind myself that I had that experience and lived to tell the tale. It’s better to laugh at oneself in such situations, too…there’s a lot of goodness to be gained by going through it lightheartedly and not judgmentally!

    • Caroline - Team Forleo

      Robin, I love what you shared about laughing gently at ourselves, and going through these things lightheartedly. What a great way to approach it!

  97. I remember two memorable and awkward but powerful moments. The 1st is at around 31 years old. After a divorce and 4 years of not being able to take holiday, I left early on a beautiful morning for a 10 day vacation to tour the Gaspé Peninsula in Quebec, a 1175 miles drive on my own. One hour and half later I had a car crash where the vehicle was open from the front to the rear on the driver’s side like a can opener had done the job with two tires that blew out, the hood and the rear door (hatchback type) out of place. I cried, shouted and sworn. The policeman arriving at the scene of the accident seeing my state (I was in shock, furious thinking to have to cancel this holiday with $ 4000 of damage) said to me, “Look, look! – CRACK! CRACK! BOOM! BOOM! – the hood and back door are in their spot again! See!!!. Take the wheel, go at this repair place and check if the axis of the car is in good condition. If yes, continue your journey!”. I was shaky but did it and had an incredible trip … with a car looking like an open can:-) .
    What I have learned from this is that regardless of fear, take the time to find a safe spot inside of you (I knew I was ok and that I could do it) and jump into the unknown with confidence. BTW, this policeman was an angel;-).

    The second event was a hard blow to the ego:-). I was about 50 years old. I was asked to give a conference in Mexico as a representative of Costa Rica and Argentina (tourism for physically challenged travelers) associations. I prepared the talk with a new computer and had a new camera (needed to take photos of the event) and felt overly confident. It blew out! … in front of 1000 people in the audience! From the presentation not opening properly, erasing all the photos taken in a simple click to being the last speaker of the event when only 30 minutes after the talk to jump in a plane! Once seated in the plane for a one week vacation in Oaxaca, I promised myself to not cry but to take responsibility of the outcome and to better prepare myself and to take care of all the details even though I am not the one in charge. Making sure that my needs to offer a great presentation are being met for the sake of people I serve. I love Louis Pasteur quote – “Chance favors only the prepared mind.”

  98. Three weeks ago I had a fall outside a department store.A tiny, minute section of kerb and my sandal, decided to get to know each other. It was the experience of time that interested me so much. In the probably three seconds before face planting, my mind had decided not to put my arms out to save myself and that I needed to keep my face from the concrete. I realised just how intelligent we can be in such a short time when we allow ourselves to be. My rib took the brunt of the fall and although that has been very painful I have discovered so many things I needed to know:
    that my body wants to heal itself if I will allow it to
    that there are so many beautiful people working in hospitals
    that I needed time out and the Universe found a brilliant way of giving that to me so, I have been indulging myself in relaxation and respite care, and loving it!
    that I have resilience, courage and an increased sense of appreciation for how the universe has interesting ways of giving us what we need.
    So thank you kerb!

  99. This comes at such a pivotal time for me. I am deciding whether to continue a recently launched business that has been struggling, or to come to terms with a new path. I have had such hesitancy in talking about it with friends because they were so supportive of me, and a part of me feels so embarrassed that my first attempt at entrepreneurship hasn’t taken off as I’d hoped. However, the other part of me knows how proud I am of myself for taking the risk, for all that I’ve learned, and for all that I can take into the next venture (assuming I decide to stop with this one). My story is much more metaphorical, but it applies, as we all “fall” in our lives and as adults, it CAN be much harder to brush ourselves off and get back up and try again. But we have to remember to pat ourselves on the back for taking that risk, that jump and that chance. Because I’d rather live with fear in the back seat then as the driver. And talking about it only opens our vulnerability and humanity. Thanks Marie, for sharing. <3

  100. Marie, you’re an inspiration.
    My fall… While on a trip to the UK in July 2015 I fell, broke my right elbow & got a concussion. I wasn’t able to return to work…the last semester before retiring from a very demanding teaching career in order to pursue my art career. Fortunately I received plenty of care, but there was a lot of anxiety. My vision had been seriously impaired, I was dizzy all the time & had no energy. I was really scared. But the quiet & solitude were a gift & forced me to re-evaluate everything. I generally have a lot of energy but it returned slowly after the fall; today things are almost back to normal. The point of my comment is that I had planned to take my retirement that following January & I did; as I was still recovering from the accident, it would have been possible to remain on disability. I knew it would be better to move on with my plans & focus on my art, better for my emotional health as well as my physical. I felt very fortunate to be in such a position. I’m still learning how to pace myself & self discipline is a huge challenge; but the circumstances with the fall & “mostly” the way the following year played out were growing experiences I wouldn’t trade for anything. Wishing you good health & happiness,

  101. Karen

    I love all your episodes, but this one really struck me on a deeper level. It’s not a coincidence that I saw it today. Thank you for sharing your light and gift with the world, Marie! You are beautiful inside and out. Much love.

  102. This is very timely. I have a project that I’ve started working on, and have gotten feedback from current and potential clients that the idea is viable. Yet I find myself…not losing interest in it, but really not being able to take the next step. And I think the fear of failure is what’s getting to me. Or the fear of not getting it right, even though I know that I can always go back and make the needed changes based on client feedback. I think this MarieTV episode ties into Marie’s video “Re-Program Your Subconscious Mind to Get What You Want” because it talks about the fear of success as well. But going back to this video, the take-away for me is to give yourself the opportunity to succeed, no matter how many times you have to get back up. Giving myself permission to leave my day job and turn my side hustle into a full time business, even though I feared the unknown world of entrepreneurship, is one of the best decisions I ever made. If we don’t give ourselves permission to do fall and get back up, we’ll remain stuck in unfulfilling circumstances.

    • Caroline - Team Forleo

      Such great insights, Nicole. The fear of success is definitely the flipside of fearing failure, and that other episode you mentioned is such a great one. Liz Gilbert also has a beautiful take on so-called “failures,” so that’s another wonderful episode to watch if you haven’t seen it:

      http://www.marieforleo.com/2015/09/elizabeth-gilbert-big-magic/

  103. Kristin

    May I ask what the name and artist is of that amazing painting behind Marie? It’s stunning!
    As for falls, I can laugh at myself easily for physical/literal falls, but I need more practice dusting off the ole ego and getting back on the metaphorical scooter for other areas in my life. Here’s to progress!

    • Caroline - Team Forleo

      Thank you so much, Kristin! The painting was actually a special commission for our studio, and while we’re unable to share the artist, it means the world that you love it!

  104. Elysag

    I ‘fell from grace’ just the other day.
    I reacted (versus responding or not) to a well intended (in hindsight) gesture by an ex-boyfriend. I reacted from my Inner Teen versus my grown up self.
    It got ugly.
    And I received one of those messages from him that rang of critique & disappointment in me etc…. I fell from grace*
    The reality of who meant what in our exchanges (and those with his fiancé who got involved) lies somewhere in between. As does who defined what ‘grace’ for me.
    However, I did awaken to how my reactivity reflected a pattern from my youth aimed at getting ‘love’ or a response, which often came in form of criticism and disappointment from parents – even if in this case what he was doing was kind, it was what he didn’t do months ago that I was reacting to. I did have other choices in how I handled it.
    The opportunity to learn from this instance is immense, however, my first feeling was shame.
    My Inner Critic sang her anthem to me “You Should Have Known Better” & my Inner-Self-Love-Sabateur sat back gloating with pride in her accomplishment.
    Ultimately I’ve picked myself back up again (this is not my first fall from grace), shed some tears, wrote in my journal, loosely ‘confessed’ to a trusted, compassionate friend and bathed in self-compassion as much as I can.
    My mantra in life/love when I met him was “I am willing to fall hard to soar high.” And I’ve lived that to its fullest as this relationship comes full circle. I’ve soared and I’ve fallen … and I shall soar again.
    xo

  105. I love this story Marie. If there is one thing I do spectacularly well it is the big public boo boo. I’ve fallen in the middle of gym classes, fallen off step’s, fallen up step’s, flipped off li-lo’s in front of everyone.
    What I have learned is exactly what you have said – get back up. When I get back up I used to be embarrassed and try to hide – these days I’m laughing so hard I’m generally drawing more attention to my boo boo. My gift – trying to share as you say that these falls and boo boos don’t have to be embarrassing because god knows we all do it and if we do nothing and stop trying – well where is the fun in that!

  106. Brenda

    Oh Marie! I so needed this message and all your personal development training back in 2001/2002 when I ventured to open a retail scrapbook store. I was totally not prepared to own my own business. I simply thought, “If I open it, they will come.” To tell you how bad it was 3 months before I opened my store another lady opened a scrapbook store. So since I was already in plan to do this, I had to open a bigger, better scrapbook store with bigger overhead. Then the day we opened our inventory, and the day our point of sale training consultant was in to train us, was 9/11. 9/11/2001! What a day that was opening happy containers of papercrafting supplies and listening on the radio to the tragedies of the terrorist attacks.

    So needless to say I barely lasted the year. Sold my remaining 2 year lease to a friend who had a scrapbook store. Branded myself a loser, even debated tattooing an ‘L’ on my forehead. Wanted to move out of the area, became almost a recluse because I was afraid of what former customers thought of me. Did I mention that my best friend/Manager of the store told horrible lies about me and why I was closing the store – and I didn’t find this out until after I had recommended her to work with the guy taking over my lease?

    It took years of depression, counseling, and personal development to pick myself up. I would never open a retail business again. But I look back on this as a lesson. I have other goals now and thanks to you, and other personal development, I am ready for my next adventure!

    • Caroline - Team Forleo

      Brenda, I’m so sorry to hear that happened to you. That sounds like such an awful situation, and it’s great you’re diving back in it and pursuing other goals now. You’ve so got this! xo

  107. As soon as you mentioned the word scooter, I started to laugh as almost the exact thing happened to me. In Mexico, on the island, Isla Mujeres, we rented scooters and went about exploring the island. We were traveling down the busiest street on the island when I was looking around not paying close enough attention to what my husband was doing. When I looked forward, he had stopped, so I had to brake suddenly. I grabbed the front brake instead of the back brake and did a front end wheely and crashed on my right side. Like you, there were no cars coming and people came and helped me get up and make sure I was all right. I also chose to get back on the bike, even though I was really shaken up. It was a big lesson for me to keep on getting up and going in spite of my fear!

    • Caroline - Team Forleo

      Oh no, I’m sorry to hear you had your own fall from a scooter too, Helen. We’re so glad you were okay, and that you hopped right back on. It makes such a difference!

  108. Dana

    Hi Marie, this topic is very familiar to me and often I let fear from stopping me do certain things I used to do a few years ago while I was still living in Europe. Back home, I used to be an extrovert who loved talking and being vocal about certain things. After moving here, in 2014, I became very shy and introvert, mostly because I’m afraid of Americans reactions to my accent, their rejection and unfriendly responses. This fear stops me from being the person I used to be and it becomes frusterating. I can say that fear changed me into another person who is more comfortable hiding and not living to its full potential….
    Marie, thank you very much for your video, it helped me a lot hearing that there are two options when it comes to fear, and we have the power of choosing how we react to our fears.
    Warm hugs,
    -Dana

  109. Consuelo

    No Voice in your video

    • Caroline - Team Forleo

      Oh no, I’m sorry to hear that, Consuelo. I just double checked the video and all the audio is working perfectly on our end (whew!)

      Definitely do make sure that your audio is turned up on your computer or mobile device, and also double check that the volume is turned up in the video player itself. You can see a little volume button on the lower left of the video, and if there’s slash through the icon, you can click it again to turn the sound back on.

      If you’re still running into trouble hearing our video, please send us an email at info AT marieforleo DOT com and we’ll be happy to help investigate further!

  110. This really is the key to life and growth, isn’t it?

    Sometimes our fears set in without us even realizing it! I considered myself fearless until one day I looked up and realized I no longer was. I had let a few hard lessons turn me into someone I didn’t want to be. So I started studying confidence as if I had never known it.

    My takeaway? Confidence and chutzpah can be learned. I believe we all were fearless at one point, and by using the right tools, each of us can get our groove back!

  111. Off topic, I know, but I love your dress Marie 🙂
    Oh, and yes, I have fallen on my face literally and figuratively. Most often I can push through by telling myself “I will not let this defeat me”. Determination is the key for me!

  112. Delisa Richardson

    I needed this today. I recently decided to stop working my Network Marketing business for a few reasons: I was losing money/putting myself in debt 2. When I really did an inventory on what I felt my purpose was, THAT business didn’t make the cut. 3. I joined in hopes of friendships/unity with other women but quickly found that things changed and got clickish as some people became more successful than others. That was a turn off to me. I like REAL relationships. I did feel a sting of failure and alienation as I saw how successful others were at the business & communication stopped. This video has given me a new perspective. I know the business I want to create and have a great passion for. I know it will have a lasting affect on the lives of women and girls. I can’t WAIT for B-School so I can register and get moving!

    • Caroline - Team Forleo

      Delisa, thank you so much for your comment, and it means the world to hear that this video helped give you a new perspective. We’d love to have you join us in B-School, and we can’t wait to share all the details with you soon! If you haven’t already, definitely make sure you’re signed up for updates at http://joinbschool.com 🙂

  113. In late 2015 in my effort to try being healthy and fit (again!) I took a fall on a bicycle. Not just a little fall, but one that threw me into a creek full of boulders and fractured a vertebrae. I experienced not only the embarrassment of falling in front of many people (which is why I got of course, by the way), but got to take my first, and hopefully last, ride in an ambulance. I was instructed to wear a very uncomfortable back brace for six weeks, and really feared that I would lay around and feel sorry for myself and actually gain weight and be unfit. However, I made a decision to spend my recovery with my daughter in California, and during the three week visit she decided to move. I ended up spending my recovery packing up her apartment, scheduling movers, and actually helping with the move while resting my back in between trips up and down many stairs. This lengthy story is to say that, by not feeling sorry for myself and moving on with life, my back healed and is better than it was before the accident!!! We must always keep moving forward, not looking back, and never, ever give up. In addition, 2016 was my best year in my business and one of the best in my personal life as well! I ended up moving to California myself! Now to get that business built up again…..

  114. Thank you for sharing your story with us Marie!

    Last time i felt like a failure was when i was among the 3 persons competing for a position which i truly wanted and a colleague of mine ended up getting it while i got the call i did not want to receive.

    I cried hard to be honest because i thought i was more qualified and enthusiast but they preferred a man to work with another male (supervisor).

    I did pass and i decided to focus my energy on writing instead and take better photos.

    Fast forward a few years and my new found passion has taken me from Canada to Finland to Costa Rica and more. All because i decided to get back up, dust myself off and do what comes naturally and not be chained to a desk from 9 to 5.

    That was a blessing in disguise and a very important lesson i needed to learn. Now i’m happy and grateful it happened.

    Failure is temporary, something greater lies ahead. Press forward!

  115. Rikki

    Thanks Marie and team for another great episode of MarieTV. I did a major face plant outside a mall and aside from all the feeling that arise at that time, I was angry at a man, who barely looked at me and basically walked over me. I truly believe at that moment I became more compassionate for every other living being on this planet.
    Marie – love your earrings in this episode – are you willing to share where I can get a pair – Thanks for all you do.

    • Caroline - Team Forleo

      Thank you so much for sharing your story and for your kind words, Rikki. I’m actually not sure where Marie got her earrings, as often her stylist will pick out outfits for her, but we’re so glad you love them!

  116. Hi Marie, This episode spoke so loudly to me. I took a major fall about two years ago after taking a giant leap and moving to a new city for a dream job that was going to give me meaning & purpose; a salary to alleviate my financial struggles; and located in an affordable city where I could imagine beginning “the next chapter” of my life. The job was already a stretch for me, as it was higher up the leadership ladder than my experience entailed, but I was willing to take the risk to fulfill my wildest dreams. Unfortunately, I panicked during the first couple weeks on what was a much more challenging job (and company!) than I had expected. I ended up making a rash decision to leave (or maybe it was mutual?) after only a short couple weeks. This was only after all my belongings were delivered cross-state…Since that fall, I have been in an extremely worse off position, even worse than before I took that mega risk. I moved back home into my parent’s basement in my late 30s; I’m worse off financially and now faced with a completely tanked career (oh, the shame of being forced to work at a deli counter with a Master’s degree, slicing deli meat for former elementary school classmates’ kids’ lunches…The horror!) It has taken me two years to recover from that failure and, in that time, I have done a great deal of spiritual searching and self-healing. I am only now rising out of the ashes and I feel so much stronger because of it. I am self-confident; have found coping skills for stress-reduction; I trust my instincts; and, most importantly, I have learned to appreciate and celebrate my own power and value I add to the world. I am now READY TO GET BACK OUT THERE AND TRY AGAIN! Wish me luck!

    • Caroline - Team Forleo

      You can totally do this, Larissa. We’re wishing you so much luck and cheering you on all the way!

  117. Jane Sanford

    A little spooky that I should watch your TV episode today.
    25th January 2014 I fell off the roof of my building 5 floors / 80ft…and 3 years later I have literally been re-built and just beginning my life again.

    Falling is so embarrassing and I seem to do it a lot now. Yesterday I fell on a muddy grassy bank and twisted my “bionic” knee …and sat there completely covered in mud – i did cry a little … but after a moment and some deep breathes I got up and walked passed everyone smiling covered in mud. We are all human and a lovely lady asked if I was OK … it was good to laugh with her about my muddy face.
    It makes to smile at how funny & unexpected life can be.

    I have not had that epiphany from my major fall or all my mini fallings but I do now know that there are so many lovely people out there in this world.
    I do know that I don’t want to go back to my corporate city working life and want to spend more time with friends & family and develop my passion for jewellery design and my Weimaraners … my knee / leg Consultant has said not to start a dog walking business just yet – but I think I need to stay healthy and explore more of the beautiful countryside.
    Get up and dust yourself off works for me … and I hope it does for all of you ..too
    Kindest jane

  118. Karen

    “Falling down is an accident, staying down is a choice” is basically my motto. I am almost a full time “bouncer upper” and have been through all of my life. It is almost as if I NEED to fall down to go to the next level, that there is no other way.
    Unfortunately there is a roadblock now that I can not seem to pass, and that is my health. After two car accidents over 10 years ago I did everything to get back on my feet and have, multiple times. Using chiropractic, diets, physiotherapy, all kinds of alternative therapies and all sorts of exercise I always get to a relatively good place. But the moment I hit the next level (like a new and improved job, playing tennis for the first time in 15 years, volunteering at a foundation, starting a new hobby) I get thrown back in time and get my migraines, extreme back/neck & shoulder pains, dizziness, lose of feeling and control in my legs and arms etc. It seems like I have my “upper limit”. I am in one of these periods now and I know I will again get there, but also every time I get a bit more frustrated and sad about this pattern and also questioning if I should even want “more”.

    • Caroline - Team Forleo

      Karen, that does sound like it could be upper-limit related, for sure. I absolutely hear you on feeling frustrated and sad – especially if it’s making you question whether you should want more.

      My personal take on it is that it’s always absolutely okay to want more, although sometimes we have to listen to ourselves and our bodies to determine the pace. Perhaps your body is telling you not to stop, but rather to keep moving forward mindfully and at a pace that feels good to you.

      We’re sending so much love your way! ♥

      • Karen

        Thank you Caroline! I definitely missing “the connection” with my body sometimes so going along more mindfully sounds like a good suggestion!

  119. Ahmad Samim

    Many Thanks Dear Marie

  120. Denise

    Thanks so much for this, Marie. I’ve been struggling with a small business for a while and last year I was so exhausted, I passed out and hit a marble floor with my face. I lost my teeth and I lost my nerve. I’m usually pretty resilient but for some reason, it took me a long time to get up off the floor this time. I made myself small. What I notice is that fear is catching. If you don’t get up and get back on it, the fear spreads to other areas of your life. What made the difference for me was to ask myself over and over again, ‘What do you want?’ The answer finally popped into my head, a new pathway opened up and I reset my co-ordinates. You’re right – you’re not the same person who fell once you get up.

    • Caroline - Team Forleo

      Oh no, that sounds so painful, Denise! We’re so glad that you’re doing better now and have found new coordinates to aim for. We’re cheering you on all the way!

  121. Eugenie Verney

    Just before Christmas last year, I was running in an off-road 10k race when I tripped over a tree root and went spectacularly and embarrassingly splat.

    I somehow rammed my left elbow into my ribcage as I went down (I either chipped or cracked a rib as it’s still slightly sore even now), and also skinned both arms.

    I could easily have called it a day at that point, but I was only about 2.5k from the finish line and I knew (from, ahem, past experience) that the adrenaline would mask the pain for the short time involved in getting there.

    So I picked myself up, dusted myself down, checked nothing was actually broken as runners I’d passed started streaming past me, and then made the call to carry on, not least because I was part of a fundraising team and I didn’t want to let my mates down.

    My confidence was definitely shaken, I felt sore and stupid, but I finished without any further drama and was rewarded by coming first of eight in my age group. Not a spectacular result, to be sure, but I do like a bit of bling and I was so happy to have kept the team intact.

    Doing a DNF (did not finish) would have been a much easier — and some would say more sensible — option but sometimes you do just have to get back on that horse (or scooter!)…

  122. Hi

    Thanks for another great video. The lesson is keep going if you want to succeed and look at your failures as a learning lesson.

  123. Helen Marie

    Marie! Your description of fear taking a hold, and taking over if you let it, is such an accurate description of that feeling, and one I have never heard expressed before. People rarely talk about fear in a real way – it really *does* set in if we allow it, so what a great lesson to stop it at the outset.

    As a child, i was one of those accident-prone kids – eventually i became quite cautious and risk averse as a result, opting for the safe option in many cases – or at least only trying new semi-dangerous things just once… I may not have made it this far alive so this is probably a good thing!

    Creatively and professionally, however, this is also so applicable to adult life, and I had not considered it this way before… I don’t bounce back well from disappointments, or failures, and what are often *perceived* failures, usually choosing to just not go there again, rather than getting back up on that horse (metaphorically speaking, tho i have also fallen off a few real ones) before that self-doubt takes root, and takes over.

    The other lesson in your story for me is this: Sometimes we do need learn how to do things properly, step-by-step, rather than jumping straight in. An enthusiastic leap of faith is frequently what is needed – but it can backfire..! And badly! Even for the lucky ones – you know, *coordinated* folk. I am now learning how to do things better – ‘properly’ even – to avoid repeating the missteps made in my previous endeavours. Takes a bit more time and patience, but my pride will hopefully make it through in one piece next time.

    Thank you for your insights and your bravery in sharing embarrassing moments – we all have them. Some of us got a real big slice of that pie… I will add that, thankfully, my worst adult crap-outs (falling off my bike… many times, literally going head-over-heels down a flight of stairs, and falling over nothing & walking into doorframes on a fairly regular basis) have had zero witnesses – so only myself to blush to. My projects, on the other hand, are public – so the stakes are (cringingly) higher. Being grounded, as someone else mentioned, is the answer for me – both in the physical and creative spheres – and that too takes practice…

    I could write a book on this subject (oops, i nearly have! ). Muchas gracias, Marie & team. Truly love your work – you are an inspiration… Stay safe 😉

    HM

    • Caroline - Team Forleo

      Thank you so much for your kind comment, Helen Marie. I love what you shared about how your projects or public. I’m also in the frequent walking into doorframes camp myself, and even though that can be embarrasing, sometimes that’s easier to face than so-called “failures” in our creative or professional life. Knowing that we’re not alone in these moments helps so much!

  124. Hi Marie, I posted my comment yesterday, but I think something didn’t work, so I repost it. I know the meaning of falling down to earth and the importance of getting up immediately, literally.
    I expl-+ain why: I suffer from a rare genetic disease, called Hereditary Spastic Paraplegia (HSP): it gradually tightens your muscles’ legs, so you gradually have difficulties in moving and also difficulties in balance. Don’t want borying you by telling my story, but I want to mention only one episode. One evening, about a year ago, I was in a bar of my city, Turin, in NorthWest Italy. I was attending to a presentation party for a pasta brand (I am a Pr) and, while saying goobye to a person, I lost my balance and I felt down on earth. The bar was crowded with people, and they all were staring at me. I remember I felt very embarrassed and sad at the same time, because I know this accident happened because of my disease. But Immediately my friends came to help me, and in a few second I got up. And when I got up I realized that I didn’t have to feel embarrassed because of paraplegia: but I could use it to help the others and to help me too. Since that episode I founded a non – profit organization, called #tuttegiuperterra (with a blog and a Facebook page): the aim is raising funds for medical research, but also demonstrate that, toghether with friends, you can have a good quality life and enjoy yourself. So, in the and, it’s not about fall or failure, it’s how you rise).

    • Yolanda Crowley

      Wow!

    • Caroline - Team Forleo

      Thanks so much for commenting again, Francesca. I’m not sure what might have happened the first time around, but it looks like your comment came through perfectly this time. Thank you for sharing!

      • francesca

        Great! Thanks to you Caroline! Oh I forgot saying that #tuttegiuperterra stands for The ladies all fall down! If you want, you can take a look at my blog francescamartinengo.com/tuttegiuperterra

  125. I fell down running in front of cops. True story. 🙂

    I tried out for a police department (years ago). I had to get over a 6ft wall and then run for 25ft. I got over the wall and landed on the other side. What I didn’t notice was there was some loose gravel and when I landed and started to run, I slipped and fell, right on my knee.

    Honestly, there wasn’t time to think about what to do. I got my a** up and ran! (And yes, my knee was a bloody mess. Eww). Someone I knew was at the try-outs and saw me fall. He told me later, “I have to hand it to you. You fell and you didn’t hesitate at all. You got right up and kept going. Good work.”

    While I am not currently a police officer, I feel that day shows who I really am. I see an obstacle, I figure out how to get around it, and do not stop no matter what bumps are in the way.

  126. Ronda Gartland

    Hello Marie,
    I live and play in Eastern Northern Michigan with my husband. This spring my husband gave me a SUP board for my 50th birthday, and got one for himself too. Everything we did with the boards was a learning experience. I watched videos, and thought, no problem, I got this. That was until a wave came from behind and bucked me off! It was rude! I fell forward and me and my paddle cracked my brand new board! I was shocked, humbled and heart broken all at the same time. I then had to figure out how to fix my beloved board, and I had some nasty old lady bruises to heal. I spend the rest of the summer figuring out how I was going to do this, and love it. It wasn’t the last time I fell, I fell every time I went out. Today I am in the process of strengthening my core and balancing. I am committed to having as much fun as I can and do it as safely as possible. The example of my epic fall has helped others realize that taking risks, and getting up is what life is all about.

  127. Thanks Marie for the great story,
    The same story happen to me. Two summers ago I was a Segway tour guide in PARIS- of all places. Now, I was trained and pretty darn good at being, teaching and owning my Segway skills. After giving these tours basically 2 dozen or more times I had one “overly confident” tourist be very casual on the Segway and basically hit a simple bump, fall of and break his leg. OUCH!!!
    So, if you can imagine the scene: me a tour guide, staying as calm as possible, calling an ambulance, calling my work, calming my other tourist, etc ,etc. While this guy was lying on the ground in agony in front of the Eiffel Tower. Plus we had about 5 more minutes left in the tour before we were back safe in the office.
    Lucky, the tourist who fell was french and knew the protocol when talking to the ambulance. He was wrapped up and taken away in a “French ” Jiffy. Sorry my french friends, but basically 2x as slow as the American ambulance.
    All the other tourist got back on our Segways and slowly finished the tour about 1.5 hours later. Needless to say, that was not a happy way to end the day. AHH!
    I felt pretty calm up until the time I went home, then I lost it. I started getting freaked about everything. Falling down steps or it something happened I became more worried then ever. In addition, I had several more Segway tours to give in the future. AHH!! This one accident effected everything that my Segway Tour Days became the dread for the rest of the season and vowed never to ride them again.

    Fast forward a year later, I had went back to Paris to work again in tourism. The opportunity had arisen to give tours again. My usual is Maris, BLAH, BLAH , BLAH and Segways “again”. NOOOOO!!! What was I to do- cower away in hiding of Segways, spend the rest of my days complaining of the horse of Segways. After about a month of contemplation I had a spark. STOP!! This Segway stuff is stupid, whatever happened that day is not effecting me now and I don’t want it to effect my future. Let’s Do It!
    I told my boss to sign me up, let’s put on my helmet and Go Segway AGAIN!!!
    My company said I need to be trained a bit again and I decided to go on my friends tours just to brush up on the lingo.
    Then I got the most valuable info I ever needed for Segwaying and Life. My fellow tour guide gave 4 rules to a segway (5 in my book-lol).
    Rule One: What’s my name (because I am the guide, call out my name when you need help– and yell loudly)
    Rule Two: VERY IMPORTANT– BREATH– Just BREATH– On a segway or in life.
    Rule Three: ANOTHER BIG ONE- Relax- just relax and chill, Relax on a segway.
    Rule Four: Last But VIP- Pay Attention, Pay Attention to what is around you and in-front of you. On a Segway and in life. Pay attention!
    Rule Five: This is funny.. but valuable- Don’t go Crazy (so this works on a Segway). Don’t wave your arms like this, jerk around like that.. because a segway is sensitive and in doing so you can fall off immediately.

    In life (and Segways): Remember name, breath, relax and pay attention. AHH!! So simple and yet so affective.

    That’s my story and hope you like it.
    Love
    Stephen

    • Caroline - Team Forleo

      Love it, Stephen – thank you so much for sharing your great lessons from Segway!!

  128. My biggest wipeout happened very publicly – on national television. I was a contestant on the CBS reality show Survivor and despite my belief I would do great on the show, I was voted out first. In spite of my failure, I was invited back to play on another season. It was my once in a lifetime shot at redemption! And guess what happened? I got voted out first, AGAIN. This was an unprecedented event on the show and personally very devastating. That is, until I realized that losing a reality TV show was not what defined me, unless I let it be. And I was not about to let my Survivor experience be the defining event in my life. If anything, after my second season I was more inspired than ever to be bold – and so I started my own business. Four years later, I could not be happier. My “failure” was a huge catalyst for my success. 🙂

    • Caroline - Team Forleo

      Such a wonderful example, Francesca! I’m sorry to hear you were voted off first both times, but it sounds like you used those experiences as such great inspiration to go on and do great things. 🙂

  129. Kerry H.

    What perfect timing to be reading this. Thank you for the humbling reminder that, despite falling down, getting back up is where it’s truly at! So many great comments, thanks to everyone for sharing your experiences. After my brother unexpectedly passed away, I fell really hard, and it took time to get back up and join the world again. Last year I revisited my dreams from fashion design school, and started to get creative again. I worked for months creating products to sell at a retreat in Mexico. When I arrived to my hotel, I opened my suitcase and found that almost all of my work had been stolen. All the hours, time, energy, money invested….gone. It was pretty shocking and threw me for a loop. Fortunately, I had the love and support of friends at the retreat, who helped me get a grip on my perspective. Although my work was stolen, the commitment and diligent focus was not; I did my part, set my goal, and followed it through to completion – and that can’t be taken away. I am continuing to create, and put my work out there for sale. I finally set up a social media account, and am facing old fears of being more “out in the world”. A few people unfollowed me after a I shared a quote from a famous fashion designer, and that’s okay too. The point is, to participate in life, put it out there, and keep on going! Deep grief can really immobilize you, and I am being compassionate with myself at this new stage of life. It feels great to create again. My brother is cheering me on! Thanks, Marie and Team Forleo, for your weekly spark of joy and encouragement.

  130. I gave up a great job I liked for what I thought was my dream job, for which I felt a deep calling. But when I got there, it wasn’t at all what I thought it would be. I hung in there long after I should have bailed, working crazy hours and trying my hardest to fix everything. By the time I lost the job in a restructuring, I was in sorry shape. I blamed myself – for not foreseeing the problems, for not being able to fix the problems, for not standing up to people, for not realizing sooner that I needed to leave. I was demoralized and disillusioned and the worst part was I no longer trusted myself. The only thing I can compare it to is a divorce. Why didn’t they love me anymore? After that, whenever I wanted something, I’d second-guess myself and shoot myself down. The little demon of self-doubt would whisper in my ear, “You thought that other job was the Holy Grail and look how that turned out.” It was paralyzing.
    It’s taken me longer than I would have thought to process it all: to understand the significance of that job to my journey, and to learn to trust myself again. I figured out after a couple of painful years that the calling was real, but it was a call to learn a lesson about service, to experience rejection, and to learn to trust my gut, not other people’s spin on things. It was not the fairy tale ending I had thought it would be, but I’ve learned something deep I couldn’t have learned any other way. Sometimes it takes a while to pick yourself up again. For a scary long time I struggled to do just that, babystepping through the pain and fear. It took so long at times I really questioned if that was it for me. Finally the fog is clearing and I’m starting to get my mojo back. So hang in there! It can be scary and slow, but you really learn from even the most painful fails.

  131. Rising Star

    Thank you for sharing! Getting back up has been one of my hardest challenges and yes slowly but surely getting there ! If you fall get up up up!

  132. Eloïse

    When I was 12, I did a canoe camp. It was amazing and I loved that. But one day, we had to cross a waterfall. My canoe turned over and caused a pile of rubble. It was everything at the same time and as I was underwater my lifejacket string got stucked under the rocks and I couldn’t rise to the surface. It was only few seconds but I will always remember that feeling. Then I’ve been saved by one of the instructors who didn’t saw me resurface.

    After few minutes I was still very shaken but the instructor told me that I had to go back in the water. I was really afraid and he took a lot of his time to help me. But he told me that it was an accident and that if i didn’t do it right now, I’ll probably never going back in the water again. So I decided to be brave (remember, I was 12), just put my feet first, then my legs and few minutes later I was back on my canoe.

    Until then, I’m a huge water lover, rivers, seas, oceans, and not afraid at all. And I’m sure that this early expérience helped me to overcome my fears so many time after that !!!

    • Caroline - Team Forleo

      Oh wow, Eloïse – it’s wonderful that the instructor was there to rescue you, and also that he encouraged you to shake it off and get back in the canoe. Kudos to being brave!

  133. Jen

    I’ve been a horse rider all of my life, I have had many falls and like the saying goes, get up, dust yourself off and get right back in the saddle. I’ve even got back on with legs like jelly and ridden a long way back to the stables with a fractured pelvis (only found that out afterwards) and have also broken my nose, thankfully not my neck from a face planting. Not only has it been scary and painful but also embarrassing to find yourself lying in a very undignified heap.

    I think it is not only the fear of failure that stops a lot of people, but also the embarrassment that goes with it. Going back to horse riding and getting back on the horse, I remember that tremendous feeling of overcoming that fear and successfully moving past it. This brought a great feeling of accomplishment in completing what I had set out to do. I need to remind myself of this and apply it to my business. Thanks for reminding me that it’s ok, we are all human.

  134. Angela Horne

    Some years ago, I was skiing in Italy. I fell down headlong while skiing down a steep approach to the end of the piste in full view of all the skiers who had just arrived back at “base”.

    Felt such an idiot. But, it was a glorious day and I LOVE skiing. It’s meditation in motion for me. I was on my back looking up at the gorgeous blue sky with my legs pointing uphill to my right, my body across the fall line. I figured I could just lift my legs (and skis) up over to my left and place them downhill across the fall line. As the hill was so steep I could actually push myself up to a standing position quite easily.

    I did it. Shook off the snow and continued skiing down to my destination with joy.

    Later that evening, I was chatting with a young chap at a bar. He said he saw a really cool stunt that day. How someone picked themselves up after rolling the skis over their head and downhill. I realised he was talking about me!

    I learned how my failure and ability to get back up with style can be a huge inspiration.

    Thank you Marie for reminding me that I got this.

    • Caroline - Team Forleo

      I love this, Angela! I love when those “failures” or things we might find embarrassing can actually be a source of inspiration to others. Such a great perspective!

  135. Mariya Nikolaeva

    To start the year off right, my husband and our friends decided to go skiing at the beginning of January. When we got to the resort , we accidentally went straight to the intermediate slope. I was planning on starting at the begging slope and work my way up but that did not happen. Now I used to ski in Siberia and in fact I went skiing with my husband 3-4 years ago at the same resort. When we got to the top of that intermediate slope I was terrified….People that were going down that hill were Really good….This slope was NOT for beginners. Without having the chance to refresh my skills at the beginning slope the fear truly paralyzed me…I could not for the life of me remember how to ski…I was falling every 5 seconds, getting so frustrated and upset. After about half of the slope was over, my husband asked me to take off my skies and just walk down the hill…I did for a few minutes, but then I felt like such a failure. I could not give up. so I put the skies back up and my husband stopped a lady and asked her to show me how to ski ( he was on a snowboard) and the lady did not speak much English but she managed to help me out. I immediately remembered how to ski and went down the rest of the hill with no problem! She was my angel! 😀
    Then we go to the beginning slope and as I was getting on the chairlift I fell on my face, all tangled up in the gear, in front of our friend and line of people… But I got back up and just laughed it off…It was quite a day, very embarrassing, especially because my husband was saying to everyone how good I was before we got to the resort..but I am proud for not giving up and I can’t Wait to get back out there! 🙂

    Thank you Marie for this episode! I definitely feel better about my self now! <3

    • Caroline - Team Forleo

      Yes, Mariya, you’re so not alone! I know we’ve all had moments and days like that. Kudos to you for not giving up and making the most of it! 🙂

      • Mariya Nikolaeva

        Thanks Caroline!

  136. Peter Varley

    I am in the throes of embarrassment of not being able to progress financially. Monday I start a new job. It is part-time, and this new job along with my other part-time job will equal for me 40 hours. It’s difficult to explain my predicament to anyone else. I see myself as a creative person, one who writes songs, speaks another language, and is almost finished with a Bachelor’s degree. And were it not for the support of one loyal friend, I would be in bigger pain. The condition that I live, of leaning on someone, will likely take another couple of months. This weekend when the weather warms, I’m thinking of going on a day of busking. It’s like you said, in spite of the moped being on me, metaphorically pressing its weight and feeling anguish, I am going to carry on with what I believe I’m here for. And thank God for wonderful friends.

  137. Mike

    F=False
    E=Expectations
    A-Appearing
    R=Real
    I had a very very bad mountain bike accident this year–actually two-one i broke my ribs the other I almost broke my arm but did need stitches also=What i learned each time–the first to pay attention to detail-when you think your almost done pay attention to you really are and all obstacles are crossed. the second –sometimes pushing too much is just that –sometimes we need say “you know what enough for today its time to finish and realax and start again the next day where you left off.

  138. Annie Ho

    I am not afraid of failure but I don’t like to repeat my mistakes. Always ready to get up again at the right moment.

  139. Giovanna Minda

    Dear Marie,
    This video truly resonated with me. Like you, I fell in Italy, 2 years ago! It was my 50th birthday and I had planned an amazing trip in multiple cities. We started on the Amalfi coast and booked 2 day trips, touring on a boat. On the second day, our captain had us take a smaller boat inland for lunch and on our way back, as I was getting into the smaller boat, the pier bounced a bit and I lost my balance and fell into the boat and landed on my left foot, really hard, with all my weight. I thought I broke it. There were quite a few passengers in the boat, along with my hubby, 3 kids and my cousins family as well. I was embarrassed by the fall and just wanted to get up and when I did, I realized how painful my foot was. They quickly ran out to the restaurant and brought back ice for me and was put back on our boat. The next stop was to Amalfi and our captain told us to go to a pharmacy there for help. They were kind enough to supply me with a special cream and wrapped my foot. I wanted to cry, as I limped around, with a swollen, black and blue foot, in this beautiful area. None of my sandals fit either. I kept thinking, “Italy is made for walking….all on cobblestone roads”…what was I supposed to do? I certainly didn’t want to accept staying in with my foot elevated and complain the rest of our 3 week trip.(this happened in our first stop) So, I decided that I wasn’t going to allow this to ruin my trip. I went everywhere and saw everything and had the time of my life. All this, while holding my hubby’s hand for support. 🙂 Each night I rested with my foot elevated and by the end of the trip, I was wearing my sandals again. When life gives you lemons, you make limoncello 🙂 xoxo
    But recently, I had another “fall”, regarding my health. Monday night I was admitted into the ER with DVT-blood clots in my right leg and pulmonary embolisms. It was a shock and a wake up call for me. I was discharged late Thursday night and on blood thinners to heal. I know that when the body breaks down, it’s trying to get our attention. I got that message loud and clear. I am focusing on me, letting go of the drama in my family that I can’t control. Start living the life I was meant to live, not for others. I love my family and friends dearly, but I was getting my energy and positivity sucked right out of me. No matter how much I meditated, prayed, wrote in my gratitude journal, I came crashing down Monday night. I’m here to share my story as an example of what not to do. I thought I had a handle on living right, holistically, spiritually, and positively, but my focus was off of me. Don’t wait for your body to scream “stop and help me”, do it now.
    This video had me in tears as it really hit me and my experience is so fresh. Thank you, as always for your enlightening words. So important to share the falls.
    xoxo
    Giovanna

    • Caroline - Team Forleo

      Thank you so much for sharing your own Italy story, Giovanna. Lemons into limoncello indeed!

      I’m sorry to hear you had a recent health scare. We’re sending our best thoughts and healing wishes your way, and hope you’re feeling better soon.

      • Giovanna Minda

        Thank you Caroline 🙂

  140. Hi Marie,
    Great video. I love that you got back on that scooter and did your thing. That’s what I would have done myself.

    As for my failures LOL let me count the ways. My most recent failure accepting an off the books job and than having the owner fire me after I poured my heart and soul into building her a solid contact list. This latest and greatest failure is the on going proof I live with; proof that I need to be in business for myself.

    I have used excuses after excuses to stop me, but not this time.

    What did I do?
    The same day I was fired I already had plans to meet with a website designer after work, I did not for one second think of canceling. In fact I threw myself directly into my working using my free time to build my e-course the way I want it.

    I love and respect people who get up every time, because I know personally it takes a big golden set of balls to KEEP ON MOVIN, DON’T STOP (like the song says).

    Thank you Marie TV
    Zoradia Scirecalabrisotto
    P.S. My husband and I will celebrate our 1 year anniversary in Italy this summer maybe I will try the scooter. 🙂

    • Caroline - Team Forleo

      Thanks so much for sharing your story with us, Zoradia. It’s awesome to hear that you were able to make something wonderful out of a bad situation. And yes, definitely give the scooters a try when you’re in Italy – you can do it! 😀

  141. Penny Casselman

    Thank you Thank you Thank you for this segment. Perfect timing for challenges I’m confronting right now, much appreciated. Keep sparkling, Marie!

  142. Felicia

    Thank you Marie and to everyone’s who’s commented. After recovering from a series of illnesses (over a period of 3 years), I was really excited to finally start my own business. But in my excitement (or desperation to make up for much lost time) I ignored the advice that I’d give to clients and pushed way way way beyond my limits. This resulted in me quite literally, crashing and having to regroup, put things in perspective and start over again (very very slowly). I loved hearing you say that ‘the person who gets up isn’t the same person who fell’.

    • Mandy - Team Forleo

      I’m so sorry to hear you went through such a challenging time, Felicia. We definitely encourage you to take care of yourself. As the old saying goes, “you can’t pour from an empty cup.” You’ll feel better and you’ll be better able to help your clients too. <3

  143. Meg

    Funny thing about your story Marie, is that I recently had a similar scooter accident in Greece. I was driving and my boyfriend was on the back (I’ll spare you all the details). Anyways, I was SO SHAKEN up and my heart was pounding after it happened. I was scratched and bruised and bleeding a bit! Part of me wanted to call for help or let my boyfriend drive. But in the end I decided to finish the drive. And honestly I’m glad I did and I don’t regret the way things unfolded that day. After all, we got a great story out of it! AND I learned a lot about myself in the process. I visualized and prayed the entire ride back that we would arrive safe, and we did 🙂 Kicked fear in the butt!

    • Mandy - Team Forleo

      Right on, Meg! I’m so glad you were able to battle the fear and keep going. 🙂

  144. Nigussie

    Thank you Marie,you are the symbol and model of change agent in this world specially for more female & male ,who are suffering due lack of confidence to do what they want

  145. Lakiia

    Peace and Blessings ~
    While cruising with my now fiancé and his family in July of 2015, we docked in Freeport, Bahamas and decided to rent jet skis. Now, I’d NEVER been on a jet ski, but my love had, so we decided I’d ride with him instead of renting my own. So excited and confident was I UNTIL he started gunning the engine and driving like we were on the road in his Porsche! Several times I yelled “Slow down! Don’t turn so fast you’re gonna flip us!” Well, Mr. Confident continued to drive fast and far until, sure enough, we hit a wave and up we flew and into the water we went! I was terrified! Did I mention I can’t swim?? Well (all gratitude given to Mother Goddess AND my life jacket), once I floated to the surface I doggy paddled back to the jet ski which was at least 20 feet away, and hoisted my ass back on the jet ski, which was bobbing all over the place! The owner of the rental shop, who’d seen the entire thing, was well on his way to rescue us. Once there, I transferred to the back of HIS jet ski (my love who was still in the water had the key to ours attached to his life jacket and I was NOT letting him get back on with me for fear he’d flip us again!) Once on the rescue ski, he was able to get himself back on our rental and we both went back to shore. He, after apologizing profusely, telling me how proud he was of me and offering to let me drive this time if I wanted to go back out – to which I replied “No thanks!”, went back out again. Fast driving, smiling and waving! Although I DID NOT conquer my fear by going back out into the ocean on ANY jet ski, what I learned about myself was this: even under such frightening circumstances, I remain calm under pressure. I never panicked (outwardly anyway) but shifted quickly into survival mode and doggy paddled myself to safety. I relied on faith to get me out of that water and (once the trembling stopped) laughed and joked about it with the family later❣

    • Mandy - Team Forleo

      That’s a really good point, Lakiia! Even during the times we don’t overcome our fear we can still learn a lot. Though it was terrifying at the time I’m so glad it turned out to be a good experience.

  146. Don’t be hard on yourself if you trip up and fall.
    Failure is just practice for success. If you adjust your mindset to think about your goals and the learning curve to achieve, then you’ll be able to live with your failure.

  147. Tina Norris Fields

    Hi Marie,
    Literal or figurative, a fall is, indeed, scary. My sister is a physician who has issued strict orders, “You are not to fall,” she said, “You are too old.” Okay, I’ve obeyed that order for the physical world, but, metaphorically I have some “beauts” of falls. I’ll share two.

    One has to do with pursuing a lifelong desire. I’ve wanted to play the piano ever since I first met one in my grandparents’ living room at the age of six. My family didn’t have the financial wherewithal to afford lessons, so that desire had to wait. It actually waited until my 60th birthday, when I began taking lessons with a local piano teacher. These days, though I am not a concert pianist, I do play postludes for my church every Sunday. A couple of weeks ago, I had one I’d been working on for a long time and I knew I could play it note perfectly and with my own interpretive expression. However, that Sunday at the piano in the sanctuary I was a complete stumble-fingers. I really made a mess of it. I don’t know why except it has to do with getting the “heebyjeebies” when I know people are listening. I was very discouraged and dejected as I left the church. When I got home, I got right back on that horse and played the piece for myself just as I’d intended to play it in church, and I started rehearsing the piece I would offer the next Sunday. I wasn’t about to let that fear of humiliation stay with me. The following week I played as I had intended.

    The second one is this: my sister-in-law and I bought a small community newspaper and took over its publication in September 2015. It’s a “good news” paper, about the people, the events, and the achievements within our county and immediately surrounding area. We’d worked at it pretty hard, and were still struggling to bring it into the black. Suddenly, my partner decided this just was not the right business for her and she quit. My partner was the marketing and sales guru, and I the operations and techie guru. Well, at first I thought I’d have to just roll over and play dead, because I can’t do everything by myself and we still owe money to my sister who gave us enough money up front to get us through the first few months, to pay the print bill, the graphic artist, and the writers. But, people kept coming up to me and thanking me for what the paper had become for the community. I set about reorganizing the business, got a new printer, and the new pricing is such that, had we been using that printer all along, we would already have been in the black. I’m contacting my regular advertisers to ask for their continuing business and I’m getting positive feedback; I’m putting together a website to give the paper a web presence as well, where fresh articles can be posted in between publication dates; I’m working with the postal service to get delivery to all the postal patrons in our zip codes, which will expand the reach of all the advertisers and relieve me of having to physically deliver thousands of papers to drop-off points; I’m building a business model to generate a click-through revenue stream from putting links to my advertisers’ websites on my site; and I’m teaming up with all the local entities that have important news for the community (schools, library, hospital, township and county boards, and the downtown development authority) to get their information out and into the hands of our people. Oh, yes, and I’m recruiting part-time commissioned sales people. Scary? You bet! But, guess what – I now see how great an opportunity this really is for me. I will publish again on February 17 and every two weeks going forward after that, with fresh articles and announcements on the website in between publication dates. Glad I didn’t just give up.

  148. Polina

    Gosh, I cried after this story. I had pretty the same, but with renting a bicycle. But my choice was the opposite and since then I never tried bicycle again. I just closed this whole “2-wheel theme” for myself. Although I wanna try one more time I thought I’m just not capable. But now I wanna give myself at least one more try. Thank you. It’s been on my mind but you made my intentions real and strong 🙂

  149. Divya Kumar

    Hi Marie
    I’ve graduated in 2014. I never imagined myself doing a job and thought I’ll start some business over time but it didn’t happen. I still have no clue what to do. Being jobless for so long it is evermore difficult to get a job now. I am still not confident enough to start my business. What should I do?

  150. … Even if “The fall” or “Accident” wasn’t your fault, it can still leave you with a devastating fear of … Starting Over.
    My life as I know it, changed forever, in a matter of a second. And sometimes I look at my life as something I’ve survived, instead of something I’ve actually lived.
    And now here I am in what I would call … The “aftermath” of a traumatic life altering injury – trying to, and fighting my way back. Except now the obstacles are bigger, and the little things are enormous.
    My life before – My life now.
    What I have come through, what I want to do, and where I want to be.
    I have a traumatic brain injury, and suffer debilitating Migraines. I suffer from post concussion syndrome, concussion syndrome, concussions on top of already existing concussions, and then even more concussions. PTSD, Major anxiety – and Really Horrible Anxiety and Debilitating Anxiety and Panic attacks. Self harm – Self loathing and Suicidal thoughts and feelings. I spend more days in bed than I do anywhere else, and a lot of the time thinking about how much better it would be if I wasn’t here.
    So, then why do I write this, why do I care; because there is just too much fight in me still, to give up. And that fight in me is to determined to Not say … Here I Am !
    This is My Story !
    And I have a Lot more to give to this world, because I have survived it !
    I am funny, creative, talented and believe it or not Extremely Ambitious – With Ideas beyond ideas. I can make a difference!
    I can write, and I can act and
    and I have SO MUCH to Offer this World.
    But I’m Struggling and Fighting with My Illness (s)
    And I Need to be Brave Enough to ask for Help, because I Know I Can do IT.
    I Just Can’t do IT – ALL by Myself.

  151. P.S. … I think that it is very important to mention that even though I just stated that “I Cannot do it alone.”
    I think that it is quite important for everyone reading this to know that I did try and because I tried, … I definitely know why I don’t want to stop fighting my way back.
    Pressing The Restart button on my life hasn’t been easy, in fact it’s been a lot harder than I initially thought. My brain injury, anxiety, depression and PTSD, … make doing things a lot more difficult.
    I took a really huge step for myself, and joined AMPIA, this past February 2016. In Edmonton Canada After being “dormant” career and work wise for over a decade. And before I new it I was heading off to Banff at the beginning of March, for a jam packed two day Story Summit at the Banff Center. Not only did I hit the restart button on my life, after not having been able to work for over a decade. But I jumped off of the high diving board into a huge ocean.
    (for me) … I decided to attend an event full of hundreds of people, after laying dormant for so many years; and went into that said event SOLO!
    I’m just ME.
    And that is exactly how I went in.
    By Myself. I am not a Production Company or “Company” of and or anything.
    A working film maker, Director, Working actor, or “Working” anything for that matter.
    The cards that everyone wore around their necks, saying who, and What they were, and or whom they were with. I wore as well. With just my first and last name on it. Nothing else. Just me. And there I was, embarking on the largest event of my life up until that point. Post TBI anyhow, and I don’t know how, but somehow I made it through.
    At times I find myself thinking, you did it. You. You made the call. You. You did this for you, and I’m so proud. Proud of myself, but still beating myself up with my proverbial baseball bat at the exact same time. It’s times like this when I find myself looking at myself in the mirror, and feeling completely juxtaposed. I see who and what I am and all I’ve gone through. I see the woman that may not necessarily be where she wants to be, but still has a pretty clear picture. And then at the same time I see and feel this weak and useless piece of crap. That doesn’t feel like she deserves anything good !

    • Caroline - Team Forleo

      Jenifer, thank you so much for sharing your thoughts and story here. It sounds like you’ve been through so much, and it speaks to your heart, strength, and perseverance that you’re getting out there and working toward where you want to be.

      We each have a unique, special role to play in the world and we’re cheering you on all the way as you’re getting out there and working toward your dreams!

  152. Janita

    Hey Marie!

    Thanks so much for this uplifting and h o n e s t video – you rock! Your advices are a major encouragement for my everyday actions and decision taking.
    Right now, kind of related to your today’s episode, I am struggling with an issue. I currently do an internship in a laboratory in a foreign country. I really love my colleagues and the work itself, but I still get every day out of work with a feeling I am not made for this job and I am not skilled enough no matter how hard I work. The thing is, that I am with my 21 years by far the youngest, and my colleagues therefore call me “bébé” (french for baby) which is supposed to be only a cute nickname and surely no try to offense me. It affects me though, with all the doubts I already have right now. I am aware I cannot have the same knowledge and experience as a post-doc or even a lab leader, but still work and study really hard to make the best out of that situation.
    Though, how can I make people see me not as the unskilled lab youngster but as a valuable member of the group? How can I prove myself to the others, if I don’t stand a chance to discuss with them scientological questions or even take decisions on my own concerning the project when I don’t have the experience and knowledge to rely on?

    Thank you so much for all you do Marie – and your team!

    • Caroline - Team Forleo

      Janita, thank you so much for watching and for commenting. While I was reading your note, one of our other MarieTV episodes popped to mind that I thought you might really love to check out: http://www.marieforleo.com/2015/07/taken-seriously/

      It’s all about being taken more seriously and communicating powerfully, so that might have some great tips for you to help contribute more effectively with your team. I hope that helps and thanks so much for tuning in!

  153. Vinny from South Africa

    Hiya Marie.
    Thanks for that great tweetable, I am now using that to remind myself daily about challenges I face and how to continue to face them with boldness.
    On an entirely different note, sorry, had to ask, but where did you get that dress? OMG! I just adore that design and those colours are amazing. Please would you share the name of the store or designer?
    Thanks,

    • Caroline - Team Forleo

      Thank you so much for your kind words, Vinny! I’m not sure where Marie got this dress in particular, as her stylist typically picks out her outfits for our episodes. I do know some of her favorite go-to’s for MarieTV outfits are ASOS, Bar III by Macy’s, and H&M, so you might find some similar dresses there. I hope that helps! 🙂

  154. Sylvia Gudmundsdottir

    To begin with, I‘m so glad I found this forum. It helps to know that I am not alone with my self-doubt and feelings. I have watched a lot of episodes from Marie today and each and every one of them had a message that I could relate to.
    When it comes to falling or failing I have had my share like most others. After finally finishing my first year studying BSc in Psychology I went through very difficult times. I divorced my husband and moved in with my parents. I had to stay strong for my then 13 year old son who was about to have his confirmation, we lost our 13 year old dog and my son‘s grandfather died. On top of that we buried an old friend of mine from childhood.
    I was so broken at the time I just wanted to give up. I saw no way for me to continue with my studies and provide for my son. But I kept going. Got us an apartment, got a job because the student loan just wasn‘t enough and I tried my best at school. But it wasn‘t going to well. I kept failing classes which in turn meant that I didn‘t get my student loan. I don’t know how often I cried my eyes out, feeling like a complete failure. I felt ashamed for not being the strong mother my son could look up to, felt ashamed because all the younger people in my class where doing better than me (or so I thought) and ashamed for being poor student with nothing to show for it.
    Thankfully I have a strong net of people around me, my parents, my baby daddy, my siblings and my best friend. I put away the shame and asked for help because even if I had fallen I had to get up again. And with their help I did. It took me more than 3 years to get my BSc in Psychology but that is ok. A lot of the people I thought where doing so well never finished. The end result was that I did it. I ploughed through and graduated in 2014. And last June I finished my MSc in Human Resources Management.
    I can relate to Marie’s words “Don’t give the fear of failure a chance to harden in your bones. Get back up while the fear is fresh“. I can’t say I’m not afraid of failure anymore. I’m looking for a job where I can use all my education and knowledge. It’s a difficult procedure and all those “I’m sorry to inform you that someone else has been hired” posts can really get you down. But even if it gets me down I will not stay there long. Through all of this I’ve had somewhat of a 5 second rule. It’s ok to break down and cry but pending on the issue, you can’t cry about it for more than 3 days. After that you just have to get up and get moving. Because if you give up today you will still have to deal with your problem tomorrow. Giving up is not an option.

    • Sylvia Gudmundsdottir

      BTW English is not my native language so I had to overcome the fear of getting my message out there without sounding “stupid”. I can be my own worst enemy when it comes to criticism. But then “Progress, not perfection” is the way to go 😉

  155. Hi Marie,
    Yes! Such an important topic. And I don’t think there’s a soul alive that hasn’t struggled with this. How it’s related to me in business was at first looking at consultations as failures if they didn’t become a client. For women, I think this often brings up a sense and fear of rejection that we’ve experienced at some point in life. That feeling of “Oh no, I’m not liked.” It was important for me to continue doing consultations, putting my best out there, and accepting that for some people it will be a fit and for some it won’t.

    xo
    Alexis Meads

  156. nice blog very helpful

  157. Adelyn

    Hi Marie,
    Thank you so much for this video- I really needed it that advice, in fact just a few hours ago, my team and I had a massive group stack in our marketing strategy class. We made decisions that were too conservative and their calculations for Unit Production was incorrect, leading to a decline in Sales, Revenue, Market Share and Share Price.
    I knew we had to increase our Production, but the other members wouldn’t listen to me, and instead allocated the remainder of the budget on other things which weren’t necessary to direct delivery of value.
    When our results showed up on the projector in front of the whole class, we became the laughing stock of the class.
    I was so frustrated with the team, I felt shame, embarrassment and rage ((I may have given them all the glare of death, and whinged throughout the rest of the seminar about our failures and the “I told you so”~ which is not the best attitude)) all at once. I took this game seriously as I know in reality, I can’t afford to make mistakes like this in the corporate world- you don’t get second chances easily.

    This video is so therapeutic- while the frustration is still simmering from my seriousness, it has certainly given me a bit of relief that we are all fallible and need to make mistakes in order to progress, or at least, restore our balance.

  158. Michelle

    Dear Marie,
    I’ve fallen and jumped back up many times in pursuit of my dreams and goals. The hardest thing is getting back up after a few falls in a row but I have become more resilient and determined despite these. The voice in my head that used to say “you’re not able” or “you’re not deserving of success” has receded. Wow am I now so deserving? It’s within reach and I thank you for your support and timely messages encouraging me to keep getting back up! Much love, Michelle.

  159. I just wanted say thanks for taking the time to write you site- I love it. I am a Solution focused Therapist and so always looking for inspirational ways to help my clients think about life and great articles to share so your site has been great!

  160. I’m a new follower of your blog and YouTube channel. I just wanted to thank you :). Unfortunately I didn’t make in time for B-School, but hopefully I’ll make it on the next.

    You really helped me to get back up on my feet and in search of my dream.
    Thanks again.

    • Caroline - Team Forleo

      Renata, welcome to our beautiful community! I’m so sorry we missed you for B-School this year, but we’ll be absolutely back in the future and would love for you to join us. In the meantime, I hope our MarieTV episodes help you search for your dream in the best way possible ♥

  161. Lucy

    Thanks, Marie,
    A number of years ago, I had a terrible fall off of a seawall at a company retreat. I broke both leg bones just above the ankle. I was sidelined for eight weeks. During this time, I made the decision to be a ‘hero’ and continue working, both at the office, but mainly from home. I did all of the things the doctor told me to do, faithfully went to my physical therapy sessions, but kept on with a major project at work. Although my attitude was great, and I was in very little pain following surgery (two plates and 16 screws), pushing myself to continue working was the worst decision I could make. I got lots of accolades for working during this time, and that’s one of the things that kept me in that cycle. Looking back, I realize that my body had experienced a tremendous trauma, and the best thing would have been to just pull away from work, and allow myself to heal, both physically and emotionally. My recovery took much longer than it could have. Now, the decisions I make, if there is a physical or emotional injury are always in my best interests. I apply radical self-care, and give myself the necessary time to heal. It was a huge lesson, and one I’m so glad I learned.

    • Mandy - Team Forleo

      Oh my gosh, that sounds so painful, Lucy! I’m really glad you’re prioritizing your health and self-care––that’s so important. We’re sending love and healing wishes your way!

  162. Ajah

    hi marie it is Ajah.hru today. i needed this video. thx   my fear was – is singing and dancing out loud. however while im watching this and hearing ur story about dancing and also knowing that u still have that fear, i dont feel: embarrased , this video somewhat erased that fear, thx again. and again u r the BEST!!!!   now, the answer for ur question is: SINGING OAND DANCING IN THE STREETS IN PUBLIC
    <3

  163. Matthew McGuire

    Hi Marie i fell down off my tricycle on vacation last year in France i hit face first into the wall of my Uncle’s house and i bleed out but i got back up onto the horse of life and kept on riding till i was great at using my tricycle. Also i lost a job because i did not know how to communicate properly to people in positive way. I learned from both experiences that life can be difficult but i will succeed when i put my whole heart to the goal of succeeding at any goal i have in my life. I love Marie tv God bless you Marie and all the staff at Marie TV

    • Mandy - Team Forleo

      I’m so sorry that happened to you, Matthew, though I’m glad you didn’t give up! We’re super proud of you and are glad to see you moving forward.

      • Matthew McGuire

        Hi Mandy do you know any good videos i can learn from Marie TV about communication please recommend me a few thank you God bless you all at Marie TV Happy Holy Week bye
        Sincerely,
        Matthew McGuire

  164. Colby Thompson

    Absolutely been there done that Marie. Except my bike was a 750 cc motorcycle!!! Yikes!!!
    I still have the scars…….. from all of my falls.
    I rode the bike all the way home from Maine to Massachusetts!!!!
    You go girl!!!
    Love you,
    Colby Thompson

  165. Meg

    I fell when I failed Human Physiology not once, but twice. It sucked, I twirled the failure around my tongue for weeks, there were many tears shed because I felt like an absolute failure and like I would be a terrible oneway nurse. Now I’m re-doing the subject (for the third time!) and I’m killing it. Thanks to my failure, I’ve had the chance to take more time to deeply understand the physiology of the body in a way that I won’t ever forget.

  166. Meg

    I also felt like I failed recently when I didn’t get a call back for a musical theatre audition in Chicago (my year of unexpected setbacks), it’s my first knock back in theatre so it hit hard. I was really excited by the idea of being in such a sexy, salubrious production that I could unleash all of my sexy juju in and I really thought I stood a chance, but it didn’t happen this time round. Not sure what the upside to this knock-down is yet, but it’ll come soon enough.

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