Marie Forleo introduction

Hi!

I'm Marie

You have gifts to share with the world and my job is to help you get them out there.

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Today’s the day you stop doing everything the hard way.

Because creativity doesn’t have to suck. And building the life and business of your dreams shouldn’t leave you exhausted, defeated, and dead inside. Not on my watch!

So… what’s the alternative?

In today’s MarieTV, Mel Robbins — bestselling author, life coach, and former CNN correspondent — breaks down cutting-edge science into a daily success habit so simple you’ll hardly believe it works… but it does. This could be the intervention you need to build confidence, get clarity on your dreams, and silence your inner critic for good.

Your relationship with yourself is the foundation for everything. @MelRobbins Click To Tweet

Mel Robbins provoked and delighted over 26 million viewers with her TEDx talk, “How To Stop Screwing Yourself Over,” and later broke self-publishing records with the release of The 5 Second Rule. Now she’s at it again with her latest New York Times bestselling book, The High 5 Habit, that’ll help you take control of your life with one simple habit.

I’m such a neat freak I almost didn’t try this strange morning ritual, but I’m SO glad I did. You’ll hear that story in today’s MarieTV, along with brand-spanking-new brain research that didn’t even make it in the book.

You’ll also discover:

  • The aha moment that changed Mel’s life forever.
  • What “neurobics” are and why you need them in your daily routine.
  • The science behind Mel’s weird little success ritual.
  • How to silence your relentless inner critic.
  • The right — and wrong — ways to manifest your dreams.
  • How to unlock the positive programming that’s already in your mind.
  • What the NBA knows about championships and fist bumps.
  • How to overcome resistance using the Zeigarnik effect.
  • One question you should ask yourself to create positive momentum every morning.

If you ever struggle with self-doubt, criticism, or feeling like an outsider, this episode will help you rebuild trust with the most important person in your life — you.

View Transcript

DIVE DEEPER: Stop doing things the hard way! Learn how to overcome resistance with Steven Pressfield and get some Manifesting 101 with Gabby Bernstein.

Now that you’ve heard all about the high 5 habit, guess what time it is? That’s right — time to actually DO IT! You were about ready for a bathroom break anyway.

Today’s insight-to-action challenge is simple. It might feel weird or uncomfortable, but growth usually does. Find a mirror, look at yourself lovingly, and give yourself a high-freaking-five because you’re here and you’re doing great! Look at that person in the mirror who tries SO hard, and ask them: “What do you need from me today?”

Then share your high five habit experience in a comment below:

  • What did it feel like to give yourself a high five? Did you laugh? Cry? Both?
  • Did you ask yourself that question and feel, intuit, or receive an answer?
  • What support do you need from yourself?

Great work! Now make sure you follow through and give yourself the love and encouragement you need. Because as Mel Robbins said:

“If you really want to be fulfilled and happy, start by improving the most important relationship that you have. And it’s with the human being you spend your entire life with. The one who’s staring back at you every morning in the mirror.”

You’re worth it.

XO

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79 comments

  1. Rosamaria Carrillo

    I love Mel. I love her books and podcasts. It’s interesting that her moments of genius come when she’s in the thick of it, but it’s not surprising. We learn the most in our hardest moments.

  2. Really excited to see my two favorite Queen’s sit down for an honest conversation. Never did I think I would be going to church. My house was filled with hell-ya, amen, preach it. So much so that my husband had to do “walk the dog”.

    Thank you for reminding us that we are good enough, worthy enough, and validated to do our one amazing life on our terms.

    All-time aha-statement: You don’t have to make yourself do things the hard way. YASSSSS!

  3. Aaaaah, the fingerprints on the mirror was my first concern too! 🤣 Thanks for calling that out Marie, and clarifying that I don’t actually have to touch the mirror. Gold.

    As for this interview and The High 5 Habit… I didn’t realise just how much I needed this, until I watched it. As a relationship and life coach, I’m so used to cheering everyone else on, and being so damn hard on myself. It was incredibly validating and healing to hear both of you talk about this so candidly, and to also have a such a profound, simple practice to turn it around.

    Interestingly, when we work with couples, we teach them to high five each other every time they have a Relationship Check-in, when they’re dealing with conflict, or when we’re on a call with them and they have an aha-moment. It’s so freakin’ powerful, and it’s something we’ve used in our own relationship for years. I didn’t realise that this power could be used for MYSELF, and my relationship with ME. Wow.

    This is my #1 favourite episode after 6 years of watching MarieTV. Thank you to you both.

    • teamforleo

      Hi Jodie,

      Right?! I was thinking about cleaning the mirror at first too! We’re so happy you enjoyed this episode. It’s very cool to see how the power of high-fives can shape other parts of our lives too. Thank you so much for sharing!

      – Jeremy, Team Forleo

  4. I felt all the love and saw myself (I mean truly saw ME) for the first time. I saw that girl who, like Mel, just turned 52 and is an encourager at heart – it’s what comes easy to me – but realized today that the girl in the mirror needs me too. Thanks for diving deep, Marie and Mel. Thanks for being REAL, thanks for letting us see your soul. High five, ladies! Let’s do this!!

  5. Oh my gosh!! What a great episode, and boy did I need to hear this. Immediately ordered the book and am looking forward to meeting the ‘other women’ in the bathroom tomorrow morning, although I’m sure there’ll be tears. Biggest Aha moment; I never have to do it all alone again – I will always have someone walking alongside me and cheering me along the marathon of life; I am going to be my biggest cheer leader from now on. Thanks Marie, Mel and MF team,

  6. Margaret Englert

    This was difficult for me, as it’s never dawned on me to actually love myself. I’ve only felt self-doubt, embarrassment, shame, and a true dislike. The picture of me dragging my past with me everywhere made a huge impact. The first few seconds, I didn’t feel anything, then suddenly it was, “Where have you been?!” Wow. It was like a secret door had just opened. Now I know how to show up for ME every day and start to turn this life around.

    Thank you, Marie and Mel. Thank you!

  7. This ….. is what I needed to see, hear, and feel today! Buying the book NOW and sharing with my coworkers and friends ♥️ Blessings to you both!

  8. Tara

    Great show! Just what I needed this morning!

  9. Over this past year I’ve been through many changes and challenges, aside from Covid-19. I’ve been recovering from a car accident that resulted in many broken bones, bought a new rural residential property that included 2 sheds and a barn, sold our townhouse, moved, had the barn burn down at the end of July and am now dealing with the intricacies of insurance while still launching my voiceover business. Despite all of these challenges, I feel pretty good. Out of curiosity, after breakfast this morning, and while watching this video, I went into my washroom, brushed my teeth, then, looked at myself in the mirror and gave myself a high five.

    For anyone who might be sceptical and think this was a silly idea, let me tell you…after I’d done that simple act of mimicking the high five to myself, I felt happy. In fact, I did it again to get a double dose of the happy feeling.

    Definitely give this a try. It’s simple and effective.

  10. Brigitte A. (a.k.a. Bridge)

    Four years ago, when I was 42 and my life was falling apart…again, I watched a YouTube video of Mel talking about her ADHD. It’s what helped me discover that I also have it and it changed. my. life.
    Last night, I wrote in my journal:
    “I need to hang in to doing the things on my Habitica list. They do matter because they build up my trust in myself. They make my word mean something. …Keeping my promises to myself is very important because I matter too. I deserve to be treated with respect, especially by me.”
    Then, this morning, I wake up and the Universe has left this gift in my email inbox. A conversation between Mel and Marie that validates what I wrote in my journal AND gives me the tools to make that happen!
    I have the dreams, in abundance. Now I have the path to get there too.
    I am the Bridge.

  11. What a great podcast! I’m a self high fiver from today forward!!!

  12. Kellie Brooks

    I moved away from motivational speakers and writers for lots of reasons, but I was nudged to open your email this morning and watch this video. I’m SO GLAD I did. It was the whoosh of fresh air I needed to get myself out of this cloud of struggle and monkey mind I’ve been in. Thank you for sharing Mel Robbins with me. [High Five!] I now have a new start to my days!

  13. Nan Smith

    OMG Marie & Mel ~
    Great “kick in the butt” to truly acknowledge myself with self-love to motivation. Already got a bunch of stuff done afterwards. My brain is “on fire” with the possibilities of self worth. Now I can incorporate this practice into getting “Time Genius” happening on a regular basis too! Great marriage of support tools. Love y’all 💗💫🌿💃

  14. I needed this today. I needed this so much. Thank you thank you thank you Marie and Mel!

    • teamforleo

      Hi Maria,

      We’re so glad you enjoyed this one! Thanks for stopping by.

      – Jeremy, Team Forleo

  15. Steph

    Thank you for this boost! I’ve set a musical alarm for a few minutes after my waking alarm, as a reminder to give myself this little pep-talk. What a good idea to begin our day with this kind of self-encouragement. https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=OzeV3YsfO94

  16. Dorothy Rau

    Dam roll is t interview! Finally someone has gone way way deeper to the heart of the sabotaging incessantly nagging voice that tries to undermine every single positive success oriented thought. Just hearing her talk about the resistance is enough to cast a beam of light on that slippery shadow. The high five has merit on every level and I’m totally into it. The real truth is always so simple and that’s how I often recognize truth. I high five you both for getting to the nitty gritty.
    Love and light,
    Dottie

  17. So good. I will be sharing this episode with my peeps! So many of us struggle with that incidious worthiness thing and this is such a simple and powerful tool to work through it. Thank you 🙏

  18. This was such an interesting interview!
    I have a MSc in Neuroscience and the way our brains are shaped is fascinating from mirror neurons to help us understand others feelings to dopamine hits from connection and celebration, and even the way fear of social expectation triggers our fight/flight because as cavepeople it would have been the end of us.

    I know a lot of the ‘self-help’ stuff we read and hear about sounds ‘unscientific’ but there really is a basis behind a lot of these things and I have to say, high fiving myself is not one I’ve heard about so will definitely be trying it out longer term for myself!

    • teamforleo

      Hi Katy-Rose,

      Thanks for sharing your perspective on this. Let us know how it goes. High fives all around!

      – Jeremy, Team Forleo

  19. Bloody brilliant Marie & Mel!!! One of my favourite episodes ever.
    So much wisdom. THANK YOU for your vulnerability and authenticity!!

  20. Heather

    WOW! You two are my “twin” sisters!!!! I have been struggling with this for 51 years ( to Mel’s almost 53!) I have been delving myself into the neurological aspects since April and asked for some more help, and Voila, as usual Marie, impeccable timing with Mel and this topic! Thank you so much, as I continue working at my own pace through B School and finding where I belong with the rest of my time here.

  21. Tonia

    I am taking away that I can visualise the small steps I need to take to make my dream of writing a play come to life. Right now I can go practice singing and then imagine myself writing the introduction of my play.

  22. Clare

    Mel…you have changed everything for me with this practice. I will be 50 next year and have followed your first 52 years of self-fuckery…sorry…hahaha… as well…thank you…my soul literally jumped outside my body and fricking high fived my physical self…wow!!! Hey Marie…love you and your team…always and forevs!!!

  23. Amazing! Just downloaded both audio books – The 5 Second Rule and The High 5 Habit.
    Marie you have such incredible friends and the quality of your TV shows just gets better and better.

    As a recovering perfectionist (nothing is ever good enough) and hypnotherapist, I can sooo relate to, being able to champion others on everyday but feel some what offended if someone tries to help me. I am my own worst critic and no one is harder on me than I am on myself. I feel like since completing B-School last month that I’ve found my family and I finally feel like I fit in with your tribe and its so nice to have other women that I can relate to for once who are successful but honest and open about everything. No competition, just pure love.

    After 15 years of manifesting I’m pretty good at it and always seem to get more than what I ever dreamed of, but I work hard, relentlessly everyday in the pursuit of my goals, in co creation with the Universe. It always makes me laugh when people tell me manifesting doesn’t work… I just have to be honest and say, ‘No friend, its you that isn’t doing the work!’
    Thank you both for being that reflection in the mirror I needed to see today! Much love Em x 🙂

  24. Lynae Fearing

    I was meant to hear this today! I was feeling a little guilty about not working out this morning, however, I now know the reason I didn’t is so that I could watch this podcast, it was WAY more helpful to me than any exercise I could have done. I don’t give myself enough time to take care of my internal mind and I am so happy I did today. The negative morning self talk is exactly what has been happening to me a lot lately and I was beating myself up about it. I feel so much better knowing that I’m not alone and that I now have the tools to correct it and to feel compassion for myself.
    Thank you millions!!!

    • teamforleo

      Hi there Lynae, thank you so much for sharing! We know it can be tough having those negative self-talk – we’ve all been there! The great thing, like you said is, there are tools to help and have self-compassion instead! We’re cheering you on! – Monauar, Team Forleo

  25. Pam

    OMG! When she talked about doing things to be worthy of love it was like a gut punch! So much wisdom here!

  26. Alison

    Tears rolling down my cheeks. I’m launching a brand new program and a big part of me is beyond excited to realize this new path and another big part of me feels like a total fraud… an outsider without any experience.

    My big takeaway: “I wouldn’t even think about criticizing her because I know how hard she’s trying.” … and I happen to be trying really, really hard. 😭😭

    Thank you both for being who you are. What a beautiful interview, it’s one of my favorites and one I won’t forget.

    • teamforleo

      Hi Alison! That big takeaway hit us too! We see all the hard work you’re putting in and Team Forleo is cheering you on every step of the way. Sending you much support! – Monauar, Team Forleo

  27. WOW! The comnbination of the two of you was magical – Mel Robbins + MF = YES!
    Just put down my toothbrush and met the woman in the mirror for a major High 5 moment. What a gift. Thank you.

    • teamforleo

      LOVE this Kathleen!! So excited you’re taking these insights into action 🙂 – Monauar, Team Forleo

  28. I LOVE you both so much! You are two of my very fave women in the world. This video came into my inbox at the perfect moment, the shit talk I say to myself is horrifying, and I need to STOP! 60 has actually been my best year yet, but I am still very hard on myself… I promise to change to that. Loading up Mel’s “The High 5 Habit” on Audible right now. Thank you, love you… rock-on goddesses, xo-Katie

  29. I will try the experiment!

    Thanks for all the gems and authentic, emotionally honest sharing (from both of you!) – and I was fascinated by the concept of manifesting by visioning the process, not just a desired outcome. That makes so much sense and is fascinating!

    I’m excited to try the latter and see how that works at reducing fear and resistance to nurturing change.

    Gratitude.

  30. Love Mel…and your podcasts! I started this High 5 Challenge to change my perspective of my body (which is helping) now I’m seeing the value of praising myself to do other things. Like posting about being a Noonday Ambassador; selling jewelry that helps Artisans around the world. I made one post so far and I thought I’d get some orders:-Nope Big Fat Zero, I’m going to post tomorrow-Wednesday. I’m going to keep trying! Thanks Marie 🙂

  31. christie miller

    What an inspiring video. This found me at just the right time. Thank you Mel and Marie for sharing this amazing information with me. I can’t wait to high 5 myself in the mirror in the morning!!

  32. Oh my god, so the same. I had so many big successes in my previous “typical” career, and then I closed that chapter, and switched over to running my own business. And then the bookstore that I started (three months before the pandemic started) has been limping along – it’s like learning entrepreneurship by fire. I wondered if my best days were behind me. I’ve been relentless at working, studying, taking business classes, trying new strategies, confronting my fears about social media, and chasing not even success but simply stability for my business. That relentlessness drove me into the ground – hard. I didn’t take care of myself, and the worse I did the worse my bookstore did. I first came across Mel’s 5, 4, 3, 2, 1 and it quelled a lot of that negative talk berating myself (I can’t believe the power those numbers have) and then with Time Genius I now know how to set my day up for success. You two are phenomenal and the combination of your strategies are LIFE CHANGING. Thank you so very much. You’re an inspiration and your candor reached right into my heart. Thank you for that transparency which makes me feel connected to something so much bigger than myself.

    • teamforleo

      Hi Melissa, thank you so much for sharing with us! We’re honored that this episode, Time Genius, and Mel’s 5 Second Rule has had a powerful and positive impact on your life. Sending gratitude right back to you! – Monauar, Team Forleo

  33. Kate

    Ohmygod, I can’t stop crying!! This is exactly what I needed to hear today… as someone who has always been SUPER hard on herself, and was only enough when she’s achieving – this interview is breaking my heart open and I’m seeing something possible (this release of negativity and criticism) that I’ve never seen before. Thank you SO, SO MUCH, Mel and Marie. <3 Sending y'all the biggest love and gratitude.

  34. Susan Colket

    THAT woman in the mirror needs YOU!
    Thank you, Mel!
    Thank you, Marie!

  35. Shannon

    I sat here thinking…yeah, yeah, high five are great and all, but I need something bigger, more actionable. Then I kept listening to the realness of Mel’s experience, to the authentic connection between her and Marie, until I finally walked into the bathroom and gave myself a high-five. I cried. So I gave myself 10 more high-fives til I started laughing…now I’m crying and laughing. Thank you, both. ❤

    • teamforleo

      YAY Shannon! We’re so happy for you! Thank you for giving it a try even when it might have felt weird at first. – Monauar, Team Forleo

  36. Robin

    That was a wonderful Marie TV.
    My biggest takeaway is: Visualizing and feeling the small steps on the way.
    I’m going to start high 5ing in the morning and watch this episode again!
    Thank you for this.

  37. Mary Tyson

    Thank you! Thank you! Thank you! I Love this episode. I am sooo getting the book.
    I really appreciate several sub-discussions regarding having super high standards for one’s self, and some days it seems like everything (self included) is without any direction and hopeless….. and that feeling hopeless and that’s ok. It’s just part of the craziness we do to ourselves.
    I wanted to cry when Mel talked about Dreams….. and they are always with you.
    I also love the supporting evidence about the dopamine hits that occur with the high 5’s. That raising your hands and arms are biological trigger for happiness.
    My self in the mirror thanks you for this episode. Perfect timing
    Mostly – thank you for being you!

  38. Lorna Schreck

    I live alone, am retired, have no children, moved to MN after living in CA for over 35 years, and I stay away from the world unless I wear a mask. Until a month ago I had never heard of Marie Forleo or Mel Robbins. Now I am soulfully connected to these two women – one who taught me to be a Time Genius and the other taught me to give my mirror a high five – in order to support, encourage, and send love to the other me. I desperately needed both, and am high fiving Marie and Mel for the enlightenment, while setting up my success plan!

    • teamforleo

      Thank you so much for being in our community Lorna! Team Forleo is sending you many high-fives back! – Monauar, Team Forleo

    • Gyorgyi

      Lorna, you are a great Lady!

  39. Oh, wow!!! This was just what I needed to hear, right on time when I needed to hear it! The powerful synergy between the two of you is awesome in clarifying why this High Five works so well to validate and build trust and confidence in ourselves! I’m a health coach and intuitively started to High Dive my clients after each session when I started training clients about 10 years ago. It hadn’t occurred to me to High Five myself! I am so thankful for this amazing interview, Marie and Mel! High Five to both of you!!!

  40. I was totally shocked to learn that Marie, with all her success, has/had the same inner critic/bitch, that I have!
    And now, after listening, I am totally hopeful that like Mel, I can banish her but taking care of the lady in the mirror.
    Thanks you two. This was awesome and impeccably timed.

  41. High Five my clients, that is meant to say, of course!

  42. Joe

    Spectacular!! Going to order the The High 5 Habit today and integrate into my life and business immediately! What a brilliant idea for transformation that connects on so many levels. Love you both!!

  43. My big demon is feeling like I don’t fit in. Logically I know this is ridiculous. I have overcome my cripplingly shy role as a kid. I love talking to strangers in line at the grocery store. But if I have any kind of attachment to wanting to “belong” I feel like the odd woman out. Mel’s sharing that she feels the love for herself in the same way she loves her kids now is very impactful. I know this love. So it’s not a stretch to extend that through my daily High 5 ritual to myself. Thank you! Mel, amazing Team Forleo & community that I am part of.

  44. Lisa

    Wow! I’m doin’ it! My neat-nick nature also understands the messy mirror issue, but I decided “hey, mama’s cleanin’ this mirror regularly anyway” so I opted for full contact. And, for me, the physicality of meeting myself in/on that mirror was important. Plus, the fingerprints mess is meaningful, a visable testiment to my self love. I will see it and be reminded, or even high 5 myself again! Love it!

    • teamforleo

      Hi Lisa! We love how you took the fingerprint mess and turned them into something meaningful! Sending you a virtual high-five! – Monauar, Team Forleo

  45. Gennie

    This was the most amazing episode and by far my favorite! The openness of the conversation made me feel like I was actually sitting with both Marie and Mel. This seemed like a conversation with two very close friends rather than someone interviewing another. So great!!
    I found on a few occasions that I had to hold back tears because I’ve been asking for help in my life lately and this is exactly what I needed to hear.
    This women in the mirror is so grateful for you both and can’t thank you enough!!
    – Luv Luv G

  46. Ash

    Feeling like someone outside looking in has been my life story, and I didn’t realize it until watching this.

    I’ve always felt like I was trying to find my way in, be “good enough,” and be seen as someone worthy of being included. I spent so much time picking myself apart to figure out all the things that might be keeping me on the outside and trying to “fix” those things, that they are all I see when I look at myself in the mirror. I’ve built everyone else up but never extended that kindness to myself. Holy crap.

    I’m doing this high-five thing!
    Thank you both forever 🙏 ❤️

    • teamforleo

      Hi there Ash, thank you so much for your vulnerability and sharing. We’re rooting for you and sending you self-compassion and self-kindness. – Monauar, Team Forleo

  47. Laurie

    It felt so amazing to High 5 myself. It made me feel worthy of my dreams and goals.

  48. Jozée Paquet

    This was very inspiring! What a wonderful dose of love and positivity!

  49. I love this episode, and am keeping the podcast version on my phone for a Marie & Mel cheer squad.
    I am in the middle of Time Genius, loving the live Q&As; I completed the High-5-Challenge last week and while I’ve been out walking, I’ve listened to Mel crying as she read The High 5 Habit. The past two weeks of having immersed myself while you both are coaching me, have been extraordinary.
    From the bottom of my heart, thank you for believing in me, thank you for upskilling me and sharing the lessons you have been taught to others.

    • teamforleo

      Hi Maddie! We LOVE how you’re immersing yourself and taking action for yourself. BRAVA! We’re sending our gratitude back your way. Thank you for being in our community. – Monauar, Team Forleo

  50. Aruna Shankar

    Thank you so much for this. This is just what I needed. Thank you so so much….

  51. It’s seemingly such an easy, simple thing, high-fiving yourself. But what a profound change of perspective! I SO NEEDED to hear this, and I so needed to hear this TODAY, as I bring a big project into the world, today. I started the habit, and it really feels weird, but good, oh so good. Thank you so much!

    • teamforleo

      Hi Gabriele,
      We’re so glad to hear you enjoyed this episode! Thanks for stopping by. High five!
      – Jeremy, Team Forleo

  52. Very powerful. I am going to send this book and talk to my girls – as they will really benefit from doing a high five to themselves – thank you

  53. Elie

    Oh my goodness!!! I feel so seen, so understood, so cared for! This is life changing. Thank you so much Mel and Marie, love you both!

    • teamforleo

      Hi Elie, thank you for sharing. We’re so thrilled you found this episode as valuable as we did!
      – Jeremy, Team Forleo

  54. This is valuable and I so love you Marie and all you do.

  55. Natalia

    Great video, great interview. A lot of ‘gold nuggets’
    Thank you for all amazing ideas I was able to get today.
    Thank you Marie Forleo and thank you Mel Robbins.

  56. Another great topic was discussed again. Thanks Marie and Mel Robbins.

  57. Very interesting and useful tips. I like it.

  58. I love this! “Get curious instead of upset!” Thank u for sharing this Caitlin 🙂

  59. LaVern

    I was so excited to see Marie and Mel together. For the past 10 years I have both influenced and guided me to achieve self confidence and inner peace. Thanks for the tools and I’m combing the everything is figureoutable, time series, 5 second rule, and high 5 in a way that has lifted me to new levels. My hand that would keep people at a distance now has a new meaning! Thanks Mel! Hugs to you both!!!

  60. Karen

    Damn, Marie & Mel you’ve been reading my life again. Thank you both I SO needed to hear this today. Oxoxox

  61. Just the idea of treating yourself with the same kindness you’d offer anyone else – mindblowing!

  62. A-maze-ing!!!!! Thank you!

  63. Gyorgyi

    I grew up in Hungary. It was only in my thirties, when I was first introduced to high five. So, it doesn’t do much for me. Took me a few days, and I asked the question: What we used to do to congratulate someone? AHA, we Pat at their shoulder. Now, that is something meaningful to me. When I pat my shoulder and say: -“well done Gyorgyi, its a new day, how exiting!” – now that was emotional! Thank you! You are two great lady in my life!

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