Marie Forleo introduction

Hi!

I'm Marie

You have gifts to share with the world and my job is to help you get them out there.

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We’ve all been there, right? Whether it’s about your career, relationships, finances or health…

You’ve got an important decision to make, but you’re legitimately torn. Part of you wants to be bold and say yes, but another part of you wonders if you should say no and play it safe.

Is that pit in your stomach your intuition trying to send you an important signal? Or is that queasy feeling just good ol’ fear clouding your decision making process once again — doing its best to keep you inside your comfort zone.

If you ever feel anxious and confused when you’re about to make a big decision, this episode’s for you.

When it comes to decision making, intuition and fear can feel eerily similar.

Despite our fears, most decisions aren’t permanent. Most things you can stop, evolve or reverse. Click To Tweet

You’ll learn four simple tests that can help you make smart decisions, every time. What’s great about these four tests is that they work together synergistically. When used together, you’ll leverage your rational, physical, intuitive, and experiential intelligence to make better, wiser decisions.

This is one to bookmark and share.

Check out this episode on The Marie Forleo Podcast

Listen Now

Before we move on, watch this if you’re someone who spends too much time or energy asking other people for their opinion on your decisions.

Now I’d love to hear from you. Tell me:

  1. What’s your favorite method for decision making? How do you distinguish fear from intuition? And if you’d like…
  1. Tell me about an important decision you’re considering right now. What are some specific exciting payoffs that may likely come if you move forward and say yes? (Hint: this is the BCS test from the episode.)

Post your answers in the comments below.

Remember, share as much detail as possible in your reply. Thousands of incredible souls come here each week for insight and inspiration, and your examples may help someone else find the courage they need to make a brave choice.

Important: share your thoughts and ideas directly in the comments. Links to other posts, videos, etc. will be deleted as they come across as spammy.

As you know, decision making is a crucial skill that impacts every area of your life. Having these four practical tools to support your decision making process will give you more strength and clarity as you move ahead.  

Thank you a million times over for watching, sharing and adding your perspective. You bring so much depth and richness to this world (and to me!)

With so much love,

XO

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Add a Comment

308 comments

  1. yes, the best way to know if you like something or not is to try it. As I wrote in my latest blogpost, you can always stop if you don’t like something. But you can never go back in time to start earlier.

    • Mandy - Team Forleo

      That’s a really good point, Teodora!

    • Samira

      Dear Teodora! I absolutely endorse every word you said.

    • Samira

      Thank you Marie! this is the thing I deal with everyday. Of course, not everyday but frequently. The physical test is also very effective I have tried this once. You are right if I meditate on the daily I will get better at listening to the wisdom my body wants to share. But, the most effective is your mantra, “Clarity comes from engagement not thought.” This is now my mantra too.

      I used to waste so much time thinking about doing things that I actually never did them. Later, I used to regret for not even trying. After a long frustration time, I started doing to find out whether I should move ahead or resign. My Education in MBA in Human Resource in Pakistan was not my best decision but my proud decision (not because of education or country. Both are amazing. Its just that this field does not match my temperament I am an introvert and also anti social). Taking English classes in Canada for my citizenship was my best decision and proud decision.

      Best Case Scenario…I have tried this technique in my MBA decision and then majoring in Human Resource Management. I could not experience the best scenario but I have learnt so much about introvert wonderful qualities and becoming more social.

    • Ooh I like that about not being able to go back in time – too often I find myself waiting, and then when it all works out I wish I had started earlier!

    • I always return to my values. When I’m conflicted, I know that it’s usually two values disagreeing with each other: for example, that it is important to me to do things well (or perfectly) and give them my all vs that it is important for me to be someone who pushes myself to grow. I also ask myself which option I’m more likely to regret – that one usually gives me a quick answer on what I shouldn’t do!

      The best case scenario of approaching that lovely, fancy coffee shop to deliver workshops is that I get to share my knowledge on PositiveEQ, which I love sharing, and I get to regularly engage with people off Skype 🙂 my brand will build and I will feel more successful!

  2. teresa

    your first idea is somehow not convincing …. even fear can feel contracting…
    these ideas are already said in your previous episodes… needed some new insight Marie :((

    • I definitely agree that fear can feel contracting but usually before you feel that fear, you also feel a spark or excitement over the possibilities if that decision is something you probably should be saying yes to even if you’re afraid. The fear will be there but you’ll also be feeling a tinge of excitement and “what could be.”

    • Mandy - Team Forleo

      Thanks for sharing your thoughts, Teresa. Different things work for different people, and not everything Marie says will resonate with every person. We encourage you to trust your inner wisdom and do what you feel is best for you. Ultimately the decisions you make can only be decided by you.

  3. Wow, this video arrived at a time when I am talking myself out of presenting at the biggest conference in my sector. I have been asked to speak by the organisers, but suffer from acute anxiety and with it comes the feeling that I am just not good enough. Although I am sure on the day I will get through it, it’s the thought of the run up and how stressed I will feel about it that puts me off.

    I’m going to have to go do those tests and see what they tell me! Thank you 🙂

    • Oh my gosh! That’s so exciting, congrats on getting that offer at the very least! Good luck with your decision and with the presentation if you accept!

    • Gina

      Louise, I teach public speaking, and one of the things that I would tell you is to realize that you were asked to speak for a reason. You have something of value to say! Here are just a few other tips: 1) Breathe. Seriously, people get anxious & forget to breathe. 2) Find a couple of happy faces early on that you can look to for a reassuring smile or nod when you need it. 3) Do Amy Cuddy’s Wonder Woman pose beforehand in the bathroom for two minutes. Sounds crazy, but it works. 4) Prepare. When I am well-prepared, I can do anything. And so can you. Finally, have fun with it. Tell yourself that your anxiety is really excitement, then go out and enjoy yourself. If you do, so will your audience.

    • Andrea

      Good luck with your conference!

    • Mandy - Team Forleo

      That sounds really stressful, Louise. If you decide to present we’ll be cheering you on and wishing you all the luck in the world. And if anxiety creeps up and tells you lies about not being good enough, tell anxiety you’ve got a MarieTV episode it needs to see: https://www.marieforleo.com/2012/03/feeling-not-good-enough/ This one is all about battling that nasty “not good enough” feeling. We believe in you!

    • Sharon "Smokey"Gray

      Forget about that part…it’s just whether you want it or NOT! Do you?

  4. Julia

    What about the list about pros and cons? it helps you to be more objective, specially if you have to make a more personal decision. Anyway I do not believe in this , you
    make the decisions you make (sometimes because of external aspects that no-one can master) and you learn, and you keep on living.

    • Hi Julia
      I think Marie’s worst case and best case scenario steps are exactly that – a pros vs cons list in greater detail. What’s missing is the comparison between them. Do the pros outweigh the cons.

      • Mandy - Team Forleo

        Absolutely, Liz! (We were totally on the same wavelength because I replied to Julia saying essentially the same thing, then saw your comment.) 🙂

    • Mandy - Team Forleo

      Thanks for sharing your thoughts with us, Julia. Marie does encourage people to imagine the best case and worst case scenarios, which are essentially lists of pros and cons imagined as if both situations were real.

      Different things work for different people, so if making a list of pros and cons works for you, we encourage you to trust your inner wisdom and do what you know is best for you.

  5. I LOVE these 4 tests! They’re so practical and applicable I’ll be sending this video to all the people I’m working with right now as many of them are struggling with some big decisions! I enjoyed your tips because even though we often try some version of these ourselves, they’re usually not as flushed out as these. We usually don’t go through steps that are so specifically spelled out, so these do feel much more applicable, which I appreciate.

    My favorite it the first test because those 2 words are so specific and I can feel what it would be like to sense those feelings during a big decision making time. I think fear can often feel like a contracted feeling, as someone mentioned above me, but usually before you feel that fear, you also feel a spark or excitement over the possibilities if that decision is something you probably should be saying yes to even if you’re afraid. The fear will be there but you’ll also be feeling a tinge of excitement and “what could be.”
    xx
    Ali

  6. Marie, this is so relevant to my heart! The husband may have a job opportunity, which would mean moving from our small city to a very very large city.

    Now, we never wanted to stay in the city we currently live in. We’ve always seen ourselves as moving within the next few years to a larger city. I was hoping for West Coast. This new job opportunity is NOT on the West Coast. However, there’s more opportunity for us in this new big city, but of course cost-of-living will go up. There’s the issue of crime, and we have two little girls. There’s also the community I have built here in the small city. I didn’t realize how much that would factor into the decision for leaving.

    Certainly I am feeling like Dorothy in the Wizard of Oz, I’m starting to realize this small city is my “Kansas”, I didn’t realize how much I considered this place home.

    So, how are we making this huge family life decision? With lots of office supplies! This was a chance for me to get my Dollar Tree on! #alltheschoolsupplies . We’ve made a visual wall lists with Post-it’s, we’ve made family journal entries about how we want to FEEL. We are still not sure what we will choose, we know what we’re risking, we know it will be a trying time during the transition. And whatever we choose we know that we’re in it together.

    Does anyone else do the Post-it’s on the wall Method? I just feel like I have to SEE it to FEEL it!

    Thanks, TeamForleo for your amazeballs content!

    • Congrats to your family though for having a new opportunity like this! I hope you get some clarity to make the decision 🙂 No matter what, it’s not permanent 😉

      • So true, Ali!

        It always feels like it’s forever, and in my husband’s line of work it really could be. He has one of those careers where his employers want him to retire there … he’s only in his thirties. Nothing is permanent! If we move and hate it, it’s still figure-out-able (even though my old programming is telling me it’s forever).

        Another something to ponder, If we move to Big, big city- what if one of us loves it, and the other hates it? That’s scary! What if my spouse wants something different than myself, are there enough Post-Its for THAT conversation? Let’s hope 😉

    • Lindsay

      Post-its for the win! I absolutely love this idea, I use Post-its constantly, and pro/con lists just got added to the mix. Good luck with your decision as a family!

    • Dear Michelle,
      it sounds like that you have chosen already. What and how you write seams to me like you want to go to the big big city but there is a fear (ok there are more than one) that’s holding you back. Maybe I am wrong but your intuition says yes but your head tries to talk you out of it.
      This is the best situation for the “worst case scenario” Test. Do it cause it is powerful.
      And do the other tests too. As some one mentions above the pro-con-list ist just another way to WRITE down your fears and hops and wishes so that you have it out of your mind and onto paper (yes do it by hand not by computer).
      Have a lot of fun doing these exercises and good luck if (when 😉 ) you travel to your new home.

    • Mandy - Team Forleo

      I’m so glad this episode came at just the right time, Michelle! We’ve got our fingers crossed that the decision you make will be the one that’s perfect for you and your family.

      The Post-It method is awesome too! Somehow color-coding things always seems to help. (I’ve got quite an expansive highlighter collection, haha.)

    • Tara Stand

      Michelle,

      Have you been to visit this new city? Is taking a short vacation there first, possible? Also, I know in my city, there are tons of online mom groups that meetup in person for various events and lectures, etc. Many come from the meetup website, others from groups that have sprung up on their own based on their neighborhood. If there are groups like that in the city you are considering, maybe you could reach out to them and get perspectives on living there from other moms? Just a thought and good luck!

  7. Now I’m going to have that song running through my head all day. 🙂 It’s good advice to remember that most decisions are not permanent. I think I sometimes get stuck trying to think through every scenario, hoping that somehow I’ll become magically clairvoyant and know the right path or answer. All that leads to is more doubt and wasted time. Thanks for the advice to “work it” and give it a small test run. I think that’s brilliant advice!

  8. These are amazing tips! Thank you. It’s only recently that I learnt that things went wrong in my life so many times because I didn’t trust my intuition, and therefore I was putting the responsibility for making decisions on others.
    I’ve been working on self love, worth and trust, which is an ongoing process, but I love these specific tips to help during the decision-making process. Thanks again!

    • Girl, I hear you. I went through a similar process this year. Tough, but so good. Best wishes on your own journey!

    • Mandy - Team Forleo

      That really hits at the heart of it, Jenna. Our intuition has the answers, and we have to tune in and listen to its wisdom. I’m so glad you’re trusting your intuition and letting your innate wisdom guide you. 🙂

  9. So timely Marie! I was about to pull out of a Mastermind group with my personal media coach, Tanya Targett as I’m also doing Jeff Walker’s PLF training at the moment and I want to come to PLF live (from Australia) but couldn’t afford it. So last minute I set up a crowd funding campaign. It’s a lot of money to ask for and I was worried it wouldn’t be supported, but first two days I’m finding not only are people financially supporting, I’ve got so many messages of encouragement right now- really feeling the love. The result of that is also that I’m inspired to work even harder! Now I’ve made the leap I know I have to pull it out for all the people who are cheering me on. Pressures on, but in a really positive way! My worst case scenario was partly how disappointed I’d feel if I didn’t make it happen, to go another whole year without stepping up.

    • Mandy - Team Forleo

      That’s wonderful, Sarah! I’m so glad you have a great group who supports you and your dreams. 🙂

  10. Shawn

    My biggest test is to be sexual and non flippant about it or to be controlled by it. Some things aren’t worth going through, and some aren’t I can cope through them all.

  11. Lindsay

    My favorite way to mull something over is to journal about it. When I write, I tend to let go of what I’m really thinking and feeling and it just comes out on the paper (or computer screen, if I happen to be typing). Then I read through what I’ve written a few times, I try to concentrate on the tone of my writing, and then I talk it through with somebody I trust. Sometimes that means I pray about it, sometimes that means I call my mom or my aunt or my husband, and we just hash out what feels confusing about the choices. I really liked your tips today, sometimes there isn’t time or availability to talk it through with somebody, and sometimes we need to trust ourselves to make a good decision or to take a risk. Recently I’ve decided to look for new work opportunities and I’m trying to be more selective, because I’d really like to do something I enjoy rather than showing up for a paycheck. It’ll be good to employ this thought process as I mull over descriptions and decide whether to put myself out there for the opportunity. Thanks Marie!

    • Mandy - Team Forleo

      That’s really smart, Lindsay. There’s power in journaling, and you’re so right about how things pour out!

  12. Teodora, Teresa, & Julia,
    Let me ask you concerning responsibility and accountability. You can list pro’s & cons, you can try things out, and sometimes heading down that road you lose time. And yes at times there are external contributing factors when making a decision. All of these things are a reality. I’m at a point in my life contemplating a potential move to another country, staying here and dealing with a potential legal battle, dodging the legal battle altogether and creating a sustainable living situation and income opportunity, going home to care for my parents, going to be with my sister who needs help with a newborn, or avoiding the family due to ongoing family drama and trauma.
    Now, for ME, THIS came in the perfect timing. I can utilize several tools, methodologies & try things out, weigh them out, and wrote a list to compare what the results could be. Throughout all of this a myriad of external factors could come into play and attempt to sabotage my move or my plans. Things could change, & the depression I’ve been dealing with from my little brother whom was also my best friend could come into play and give me more mental and emotional difficulties. Anything could happen. This is the reality in the wisdom this woman offered freely…YOU CHOSE. You have the power to chose, to make evasive maneuvers if you need to should things change or new challenges present themselves. The bottom line is CHOSE. She offered advice to help facilitate YOU CHOOSING. She gave you 4 simple tips to HELP. They are not Universal, Spiritual Miracles, they are tips, tools that could help you facilitate what IS UP TO YOU IN THE FIRST PLACE, hopefully making it easier to make a decision. She never said any of this was law, and that you couldn’t incorporate other tools and strategies.

    A wise man once said, “It does not take any man (or woman) of substance much time to make a decision, considering he has all the pertinent information needed to accurately access his options. And that same man (or woman) takes a very long time to change his mind, for he has the character to see his vision through, less he discover it was a fatal path to chose, then he can redirect.”

    • May I add, I didn’t state correctly, ‘Losing my little brother and best friend’, he passed. Still standing firm in the decisions I make, and I own them, regardless of external factors or internal struggle. 😉

      • Mandy - Team Forleo

        Thank you so much for what you shared, Echo. We appreciate you, and we’re so sorry to hear your little brother passed away. We’re sending tons of love and healing wishes your and your family’s way.

    • I agree that ‘the choosing’ is the important part!

      It’s all well and good to mull over, analyse, consider etc decisions but I think getting that help when it comes to the final decision-making step is crucial.

  13. Linda

    Great insight into decision making and yes, I totally agree with the physicality of making a decision; it has to feel right! I did the test and it confirmed what I already knew. It’s time. I weighed the potential for failure against the benefits of success and quickly realized that success rested in my hands and that “success” looked really good, it’s what I want for my future!

    • Mandy - Team Forleo

      Absolutely! It’s a very physical manifestation of our intuition. 🙂

  14. I generally just make my decision. Doesn’t matter whether it’s yes or no. In the instant after I’ve decided, I’ll get a feeling of yea! and visions of all the cool things that will ensue, or, I”ll get a feeling of regret over what I’ll be missing out on. It’s in those instant reactions that I know how to make my final decision.

  15. It is exactly what I needed today! Thank you very much, Marie!

  16. David

    A sense of fulfillment. Best payoff ever. 🙂

  17. This is really helpful at this point in my life! Best case scenario, living the life I have been dreaming for so long!
    Thanks Marie!!! You are awesome!

  18. The first step I think can never be underestimated. I say this as a woman because I think many of us ignore those physical messages we get from our bodies because many of us are out of touch with that part of our being. It’s what ties everything else together on a creative spiritual level, because the body is sacred. If we don’t get that, we miss the other important bits of making the right decisions.
    We all might have heard some of this information before from different sources, but I believe we need to be reminded, because human beings are good at forgetting to apply what they already think they know!

    • Mandy - Team Forleo

      So true, Catherine. It can be hard to make the best decisions for ourselves when we’re out of touch with our emotions and intuition.

  19. Robert Cyr "Truckin Bob"

    Thank You for this episode. It couldn’t have come at a better time!

  20. Ok, love this, made me feel excited straight away especially after the Missy Elliot rap:)… so cool! I have been thinking of selling my house so I can travel around the world and can get more training on marketing. I feel stuck in my little world and want to break free, my business isn’t growing for years now and all my ideas are not becoming succesfull. It however is freaking me out to break free and take off leaving everything behind…
    So here’s the best case scenario. After traveling and learning from the best teachers, I will have all the strenght, wisdom and insight to make my business the best there is. I will be so succesfull that after 1 year I can buy a small place and in a couple of years even a biggger place

  21. Thanks Marie, exactly what I needed to hear.

  22. Love the simplicity of it. I also use some similar tools but you came out with the facility of putting several together for a deeper understanding and accessible to practice. And be aware of the events and circumstances in our lives that require an action. I Love how gracious and uplifting you are when explaining it. For me payoff, depending on the situations, is freedom, love, a sense of meaning, gratitude, expansion, abundance and life quality.
    Thanks for your inspiration.

    • Mandy - Team Forleo

      Thanks so much, Salomé! It definitely makes sense that putting more tools together leads to deeper understanding. We’re so glad you enjoyed this episode and shared your insights. 🙂

  23. Great timing. I’m in the process of trying to decide if I go forward with a new project collaborating with a friend or not. I’m really torn and I see red flags, but I struggle with not following through. The body has said yes in the past but given certain things that have occurred over time, my body is not wanting to move toward this project. The worst case scenario is it completely falls apart and my reputation goes in the trash within the industry…which is something I am not willing to accept. Best case scenario is that it is a TOTAL success and adds to my reputation and also strengthens a relationship I love with my friend. Plus, her career will be propelled into a new stratosphere, too. Regarding engagement…I’m an activator. I do what I say I’m going to do, and I get things done. I fear the partner in question isn’t and I’d be dragging her along…which kills me. I would really struggle with this and the impact it would have on our relationship. So…I am still stuck…

    • Hey Brett! For what it’s worth, I’d urge you to trust the red flags and body signals. Your body often knows truth that your mind/ego doesn’t want to see. XXO

    • Hannah

      Brett,
      If it is a matter of “following through” like you mentioned, maybe keep in mind that it is important for us to follow through on our commitment to ourselves too! And in terms of the building-the-friendship aspect of the best-case-scenario, there might be some other fun ways to do that if this opportunity makes you feel “contracted” like Marie says, but you are excited about investing in the friendship. I wish you and your friend the best success!!
      xo
      Hannah

  24. Lisbeth Tanz

    This is such a timely video! You will likely laugh, but my big stop was how to restart my workout program. So many options – so little time. Not to mention not tons of money to spend. Given that I need accountability, using free workouts or paying for workouts to do at home weren’t cutting it. As a writer and editor, I spend my days alone in my home office. I’m comfortable there. And there’s the issue – too comfortable. Your last point about engagement resonated. I just need to go try some things and find the one (or two) that work for me that won’t break the bank either. The downside is I’ll have to get dressed. The upside is a rockin’ body in a few months that will have me looking good in my son’s wedding pictures. 🙂

  25. I love your videos. You always make me laugh! I’ve always had that physical reaction when something isn’t quite right. I’m rarely ever wrong too, just ask my husband. I can’t tell you how many times we’ve been in some situation or had a decision to make and I told him it wasn’t on the level but he did it anyway and it turned out bad. lol

  26. Catherine

    Hello Marie.
    I lived in Europe all my life and always wanted to live in North America, ever since I was little. I always felt it deep down in my gut. Then, finally, at 33, I did my test-run and visited Toronto and Montreal for a couple of weeks. Back in Europe, I gathered all the info I needed to apply for permanent residence, and today I live in Montreal. I gave up everything, my job, my friends, my family. But I know it was the right move. Attention, making the right move does not mean living in Nirvana after that. The happily ever after myth is something that deceived and mislead people in my generation, especially women….I am now in the phase of professional reorientation which is what brought me to your page. Thank you for all you do. Catherine

    • Great story Catherine and I agree. It’s not going to be all rainbows and unicorns when you make a ‘right’ choice for you, but in the long-run it still outweighs the alternative.

    • Marie-Eve

      Hi Catherine! I am in Montreal too!! And I will also start my career change. I am actually a biologist, trying to decide what to do next!! Good luck to you!!

  27. Jen

    After months of exhaustion, I made a terrible decision that cost me my job. I was a valued employee who was pulling crazy hours working to 2-3am on a massive project hoping it would pay off in a big bonus when an opportunity presented itself, and uncharacteristically for me, I decided to just go for it. I didn’t think it through and I didn’t know what I did was wrong when I did it. After I did it, a part of me thought: oh, I wonder if that’s okay? And I rationalized that I was such a dedicated employee, that hopefully if in the chance it was not acceptable, that I’d get a slap on the wrist and it would be the only chink in my shining armor of a stellar record of over a decade of service.
    My crime: I slipped a script I wrote to a celebrity spokesperson visiting my company for the day. It was an afterthought as I was making them a care package anyway and thought about my own long plane rides I had been taking for the company. I naively thought the person might like snacks…and something to read on the plane. Now, of course, I see that it was wrong. I stood to personally benefit if the celebrity liked my script and I never meant to offend anyone or use my employer that I had given my blood, sweat and tears to. I just made a mistake because I took my partner’s advice: he said “You don’t want to wonder ‘what if’; some things are worth the risk.”
    Well, I can tell you from experience to for sure try to test drive decisions before going for it because some things are NOT worth it. I was fired on the spot, no severance, no big bonus I had killed myself for, and nothing I could do to undo the isolated poor decision that cost me my job. I wrote a formal apology to the company and would have done whatever was needed to make it up to them and the celebrity (though I suspect the celebrity never even saw my script) and at the end of the day, the project was wrapping up, my company got what they needed from me and they saved themselves a lot of money. Totally not worth it.
    I wish I could say I have a silver lining that I went to go on to sell the script, but I have no contacts in Hollywood and have no idea how to sell a female comedy in this Trump culture we now find ourselves in. I keep praying that some successful female producer or star will buy it, it’ll get made and be a big hit. But that type of starry-eyed thinking got me into this mess! And the flick is highly commercial and not something indie that will win contest awards…so back to the grind…except now I can’t seem to land a full time job despite 20 years experience.
    I don’t want to be a Debby Downer, but if I can spare anyone else from the restless nights of staring up at the ceiling, let my story be a cautionary tale that sometimes wondering ‘what if’ and living with hope is better than asking ‘why’ and living with the consequences.

    • Mandy - Team Forleo

      I’m really sorry to hear that happened, Jen! We appreciate you sharing this with us and we’ve got our fingers crossed that things will get better soon. <3

  28. I just went through this. I turned down a job offer that many folks would love to have. It came down to playing out two “best case scenarios”. One if I took the job and two if I continued on my current path.

    Once I looked at that and then sat with those two outcomes, turning down the job offer felt much more peaceful and on target with who I am creating myself to be.

    And, I’d add this to Marie’s insights…

    Once the choice is made, there’s another cruscial decision that has to be made. I heard Charlie Tremendous Jones say on decision making: “Make it. Don’t wait until you can make the right decision. Make a decision and then make it right.”

    The point is you’ll never KNOW the decision was right or wrong, so once you do make it the real work begins. And that work is to MAKE the decision the right decision by giving it your all and not wondering what might have been.

    I expanded on this in a blog post titled, “Making the Right Choice vs. Making the Choice Right.”

    Fact is, we live in a world of great choices. Most people who have the time to read and listen to Marie are in a good enough spot that many of their decisions are between two good choices — that’s why the choices are tough. So, let’s keep that in perspective too… often we spend a lot of time and energy deciding between two good, or even great, choices.

    That’s a wonderful problem, yeah?

    • Mandy - Team Forleo

      Yes! And thank you so much for sharing this with us. You’re so right that not every decision is between a good thing and a bad thing—sometimes there are two good options and the best decision comes down to what feels right to you. Other people might disagree, and even “logic” might disagree, but our intuition is always right.

  29. Hello, I don’t think there is a right decision, just the decision your gut is telling you to make at this time. And it might seem wrong now, but down the road it will lead you to the place you needed to go all along. I made some seemingly stupid decisions that ended up being the best ones for me. Life is a rollercoaster ride. Better to get on, learn to enjoy the ups and downs, the curves rather than fret about making the right decision. Sometimes you need to go back to move forward or sideways to move forward. And forward may be a circle or a zigzag. We are taught it is one straight line when all that does is gallop you toward the cliff …

    Giulietta

    • Mandy - Team Forleo

      That’s a really good point, Giulietta! Sometimes life and its many decisions looks more like a chess board than a one-way street. 🙂

  30. Meagan

    I’m planning a move to New York City later this year. I’ve been wanting to move to a big city on the East Coast, and NYC just feels right (out of D.C., Boston, Philly)…I think I’ll feel more inspired (I need some fresh energy) and more business opportunity. I’m solely afraid of floundering, since I’ve never relocated, and not sure where I want to continue my career that will be a support for my passions. This video helped – thanks Marie 🙂

  31. Linda

    Another simple trick to test if a “yes/no”decision is right or not is to flip a coin. Don’t let the simplicity fool you. It’s not which side the coin lands on that is important it’s how you immediately FEEL about the answer. Note is it a “oh no” or “hell ya”. Maria is right the body has intelligence that by-passes the logical mind…it’s called the Vagus Nerve.

    • Verushka

      WOW!!!! I didn’t believe the physical test could work, but that’s it right there. It’s what side you are hoping the coin lands on while flipping it!!! Thanx Linda!!

  32. sumi

    Dearest Marie,

    It is said that the Teacher will appear when the student is Ready..
    I was finding it difficult to take a decision even by being a psychological professional..
    Love you Marie for the timely appearance ..
    love you Loads.. Thank you ..
    XoXo

    • Mandy - Team Forleo

      Thank you so much, Sumi! I’m so glad Marie appeared right when you needed her. 🙂

  33. Helen

    I have developed a compassion based self-healing process and have had a lot of push pull around getting it out there. Should I work with Clients? Workshops? Writing? My healing involves dialogue with heart and gut intelligence, so part of that has been using the contraction/expansion method. I find when it’s a ‘NO’ I feel dense energy, slightly heavy, slightly contracted (it’s subtle as you say Marie). If it’s a ‘YES’ the dense energy is absent and as I breathe my rib cage expands easily, there’s a lightness and openness. I find using my breath really helps. So, I ask the question (or simply state ‘I am going to do X’ then I take in a deep breath and notice the energy in my lower belly area (below the belly button). As I breathe, is my energy opening outwards and upwards or is it the dense heavier energy that won’t expand with my breath.

    Today, I used it and my answer is to write a book that is a metaphor for awakening. I asked ‘Working with Clients? A=No’ Teaching classes/workshops? A=No’ When I got a yes for writing, I reined it further and further with more questions, until I had complete clarity. Next I’m going to ask about the practical details, how many hours per day?week to write, scheduled or when the inspiration strikes etc. My BCS is that I get to be creative (always told myself I’m not creative) become an Author….yay! (I’ve always played small) earn money (I’ve been a non-earning Housewife for the past 16 years) if it’s a best seller my Hubbie gets to retire, I’d love to give him that gift as he’s always supported me doing 100% what I want to do.

    • Marie, these are awesome steps and ones I think most of already know but need to be reminded of frequently. I’m taking a business analysis course right now and I will be sighting this video with respect to a key function of Business Systems analysis – that is, problem resolution. Once a business has identified a problem and brainstorm a number of potential solutions these steps also help to decide which is the best solution. Thanks for contributing to my bibliography lol 😉

    • Hi Helen
      You must, must, must read Elizabeth Gilmore’so book, big magic and watch Marie’s interview with her. Did I mention it’s a must do. 😉 Good luck

    • Mandy - Team Forleo

      It’s wonderful to hear you’re feeling called to write a book! What a great way to share your wisdom. We’ll be cheering you on. 🙂

  34. Marie, these are awesome steps and ones I think most of already know but need to be reminded of frequently. I’m taking a business analysis course right now and I will be sighting this video with respect to a key function of Business Systems analysis – that is, problem resolution. Once a business has identified a problem and brainstorm a number of potential solutions these steps also help to decide which is the best solution. Thanks for contributing to my bibliography lol 😉

  35. LOVE this series of questions !!
    Thank you Marie, I wrote it all down and you can be sure that I’ll be using this is the future to help me make sound decisions that are in alignment with who I am! I find that since I have a bright shiny energy, many people want to ” do ” things with me and I get rushed into making decisions. However since I am the Boss of Me, I also love the idea that I can give myself permission and the directive to see if it passes The 4 Q tetst. I am sure to have SO many insights !!
    Thank you beautiful, have a fabulous day !!
    Cydney

  36. I was recently accepted into my first wholesale trade show, and the opportunity came up to also be a retail vendor for the second part of the show. It meant a much bigger expense, a longer hotel stay, and needing to make 3 or 4 times more product than just for the wholesale portion of the show. It also came with an opportunity to reach another market, generate more sales, and ultimately, an opportunity for a bigger paycheck…. bigger risk, bigger rewards right?

    I needed to decide fairly quickly and knew that it was an opportunity more than anything else. I definitely used the gut reaction method for making my decision. I could feel that even though it was scary, it was also exciting. Jump towards your fears right? The main thing that was holding me back was getting the support from my husband because the financial decision was greater. (He obviously came on board after we talked through the risks and rewards.)

    That show is now two weeks away, and I am still nervous, but mostly excited. However, a few things happened since I accepted the opportunity that prevented me from being prepared as I needed to be. While I know everything will still work out, and I am still glad about the decision I made, I definitely learned a lesson in biting off a bit more than I can chew.

    Ultimately, I am still hopeful to grow my business with wholesale accounts and meeting new clients outside of my current demographic.

    • Mandy - Team Forleo

      Love that, Emily! I’m so glad you made the decision that’s best for you even though it was a little scary at the time. We’ve got our fingers crossed that the trade show will go wonderfully!

      • Thanks very much Mandy! So glad to be a part of this wonderful community.

  37. Seriously Marie. Your voice is so distinct in my spirit that I just want to take action!

    I have always struggled with decision-making. But you have helped me get better and I love these for ideas. The first one and the last one are probably my favorites!
    I think that my BCS for making a decision to move forward, even if it’s slowly, on my desired career path, will be huge growth in my creativity and multiplying my God-given talents, resources, and experiences. Now THAT would be rewarding!!!

  38. Jo

    OMG, I think I just realised that my best case scenario is my worst case scenario! What the heck do you do when you suddenly figure out that you’re terrified of success and what that means for you?

  39. Alma

    Thank you so much, this could not have come at a more perfect time for me! I’ve been a stay-at-home mom for a long time, and now that my youngest started preschool, I really want to work. I tried to look for work from home opportunities but it’s been really hard. I haven’t found anything that can make me a real income, and anything that has the potential of providing a real income requires some investing, which I can’t do right now. My only option would be to find a part-time job so that I can use that income to pay for investing on courses and such. I love being at home with my kids, making them breakfast in the morning, dropping them off at school, picking them up, those are things I may have to sacrifice if I take on a part-time job. But I’m doing this for them, because I want to provide them with a better life, more opportunities, more adventures, so that’s why I’m so torn with this decision. My children are extremely attached to me, I’ve always been available for them, so this is something they’ll have to adjust to as well. Time for me to put these 4 test into practice.

    • Marie-Eve

      Alma, I so understand what you mean!! I will be doing a career change soon, and I know it will include some time away from my children. I do work now but my schedule allows me a lot of freedom, and I do spend a lot of time with my kids. I don’t want to miss anything from their childhood, but at the same time, I am really not happy at my job. I think that, even if I have to make some sacrifice and spend a little less time with them for a while, while I am in school or starting a business, it will be worth it in the end. I also see this as being a role model for my child, by modeling that its possible to change path in life, to be happy professionnally, that we can do anything we want if we set our mind to it! But I really agree its hard to make a decision that will take time away from the children. I try to see it in the long term, and think it will really be worth it. And children are super resilient too!!

      • Alma

        Marie-Eve, I agree. I do feel that it is worth it to pursue our dream careers, even if that means sacrificing a bit of time with the children. And yes, being a role model to them is important to me too. Thank you so much for your reply, it gave me some encouragement! Good luck to you in your new career!

  40. Justine

    I have been wrestling with increasing my rates as a marketing consultant and copywriter. I finally told one of my clients and it’s not going over well. I’m trying to determine if my increased rates are truly justified or if I need to honor the original agreement. With the amount of work that I am receiving at this lower price point, I needed to weed out the smaller clients and focus on high level projects. But now I’m in the middle of back-and-forth emails over the original agreement versus new proposed rate. Is it worth it? Am I working with a nickel-and-dime client or am I truly overcharging? This is a decision that definitely makes me feel contracted!

  41. Your quote “clarity comes from action” has been on my bedroom wall for the past year or so. It really helped me launch my YouTube channel and find exactly what I wanted to share. I was too nervous thinking that I needed all of the “perfect” ideas and spent about a year just thinking, then I heard your quote in a past video and just started. It didn’t start off pretty, haha but it eventually got there and now I love the clarity of my vision for it! Although I love (and use!) the idea of listening to your body to make decisions, I have trouble using it when it has to do with taking a job. As a student, I can’t always tell if I want/need the money and it is clouding my ability to listen. 🙏🏽🤗 Namaste beautiful Marie and Team Forleo.

    • Mandy - Team Forleo

      Right on, Tara! I’m so glad you followed your heart and put yourself out there. Go you!
      (And if you want some inspiration, check out this early MarieTV video: https://www.marieforleo.com/2011/01/haaappy-year/ A lot has changed over the years!)

  42. My life is ABOUT making decisions…which I do.. (did until I watched this video), mostly with my guts.
    My next-to-come decision will be about “Shall I move back to Paris, or not?”
    I know, I know it is normally the other way around for French people: Paris first for work, and then…anywhere else but there.
    So why would I want to get back there? And more precisely what would be great about it?
    Well, well, CULTURE, BEAUTY, THEATRE, INTERESTING PEOPLE (like with strange-not-to-be-found-anywhere else professions), the METRO (yes, the metro with all the grumbling people in there- I always liked the metro, don’t ask me why).
    Concretely I would throw myself into culture, go back to my dance classes, and perhaps, get some work to get to some money to keep going on with those things.
    Wouldn’t that be awesome?
    Plus I’ll start my career as a coach because I’ll have the energy to do so…

  43. Thank you for this … these were words at the ABSOLUTE right time. I’m a major procrastinator … but really, it’s just because I get scared and so then don’t move forward. Imagining the worst case scenario is truly the answer for me … because honestly, it’s never really that bad : ) Thanks again!

  44. Elvina

    Hey! This is exactly my case! Thanks!

  45. My dilemma: Stay in business with work partner, move with work partner to a merged situation, or leave the partner. The partnership is less than satisfactory yet I am not sure I want to go this alone or even stay with this work. My real love is teaching yoga, helping people that way, yet that’s not financially rewarding. My fun and passionate way of teaching, especially with several years and certifications (Urban Zen 500 hour and 200 hour elsewhere) enable me to share important knowledge on how to stay grounded and accept yourself on the mat…most importantly trying to teach and believe myself you also have the tools with yoga to be “off” the mat, stay grounded and accepting. I know how I feel on either side of the yoga room, teacher or student, and I often wonder why not live on my mat!? Because as I said before we must learn to take our practice off the mat and into the world for ourselves and others. I may even have more time and make more time if I slowly just move away from this business (recruiting, I didn’t mention before). I know everything is reversible. It’s the fear of….many words could fit in here, some unrealistic. I’ve been recruiting for 25 years, teaching for 10. I know change must come and I am just trying to FEEL what change is best for me. Thank you Marie for your positive and enthusiastic and real way of sharing healthy information with us.

    • Mandy - Team Forleo

      Thank you for your kind words, Nancy. We’ll be sending positive energy your way in hopes that your intuition will help you make the best decision for you.

  46. Nadia

    Thanks for sharing this awesome piece of content, Marie. You cannot imagine what impact you had on my life!

    After having studied business administration and having worked for a big corporation I joined a Startup. But now, after only a few months, i start having the feeling of not doing the right thing for me. I have always been fascinated about how we as human beings are interacting with each other – and especially how the behavior of our society is impacted by economical or political changes. Long story short: I am thinking about going to university again to study sociology. It’s a big step, but when I think about my future in that area I feel a strong sensation of “expansion” in my body. It’s going to be a tough time, since I have no financial support, but I am sure I will find a way to make it happen. “Everything is figureoutable”, right?

    • Mandy - Team Forleo

      Thank you so much, Nadia! It sounds like you’ve got a big decision ahead, so I’m really glad this episode was helpful.

  47. Monica

    The BCS that would come from my decision is that I’d secure the promotion that I’ve been seeking. It would be with a company I like and could see myself retiring from. I’d be thriving in my new environment and enrolled in school working towards finishing my degree. My three adult sons would be figuring things out as they learned to stand on their own. Although they’re facing challenges, for the most part their okay. I wouldn’t regret the decision I made to leave my current employer after 17 years.

  48. Lisa

    This is so timely. I am trying decide what to do with my life. My husband and I have been planning to move abroad and we are at a place where it’s a good time for me to go professionally, but he isn’t ready. There a lot of factors in this (money, the house, kids in college, etc). He has offered the suggestion that I go first and he follows, but I am not sure. I am worried about what that would do to our relationship. These strategies are interesting…

  49. I’ve been a HUGE fan of this man (Paul Scheele) for a few years now and credit him for saving my life!

  50. Debra Mowatt

    Gosh, this was timely. I have so many decisions I am mulling over. Like starting a Health Coach practice, or just getting a job somewhere. Or going back to school and finishing my grad degree.
    But I think the biggest is to sell my house or not. Worst case scenario- it doesn’t sell, and I can’t afford the upkeep and taxes. Or I sell it, and can’t find a new place to live that I can afford. The best case, I sell it for a large amount, and can move to a place I like, can afford, and still have savings left over as a rainy day fund.

    • Mandy - Team Forleo

      It does sound like you’ve got a lot of big decisions on the horizon. I’m so glad this episode was helpful. We’ll be sending lots of love your way as you’re deciding what’s best for you.

  51. Thanks for sharing this awesome piece of content, Marie. You cannot imagine what impact you had on my life.
    I am perfectly legitimate for me to smile & doubt my sincerity when I tell you I can rich in just a few days. But before me make up my mind, why not try a little adventure?
    From the last two & half years ago I decided to go even further in my quest to aid people became the situation was becoming really critical. I’ve had nothing but positive responses and letters of thanks….. I know luck is going to keep on smiling on these people for a long time to come. It’s a secret I inherited from my spiritual master, a very great chinese sage who never stops teaching me things. I have tremendous admiration for him & I have seen him perform miracles with my one eyes.

  52. Hello Marie,
    I am doubting to join the B-school in March… i was convinced a month ago, and then came the doubt again, and now my decision changes from day to day. I am not sure because it is a lot of money that i have to borrow (or attract?) because my business isn’t not yet earning that money… I am a garden designer, blog writer, painter, and i love this work so much but the money side isn’t working yet… What should i choose?
    Sofie from Belgium

    • Hey Sofie! I’m clearly biased since I’ve seen the results it helps our students create. 🙂 So my vote, naturally, would be to do it. As long as you’re willing to do the work, I believe you’ll get tremendous benefit out of it. We don’t open registration until February 22nd — so pay attention to emails from us and when the time comes, make the choice that feels best in your heart!

      • Thank you a lot Marie! When i was doing your 4 step test yesterday, the answer was 4 times a big YES! so yes, i think you’ve got a new B-schooler in spe from Belgium… Thank you for your inspiration!!! Love from the rainy little Belgium!

  53. Perfect advice at the exact time I needed it. Thank you so much! My intuition is super strong on a new job opportunity and after running it through your 4 steps, it clearly is a no-brainer. After reading a few books about the FP (Field of Potentiality, aka God) and how you can request—demand even—a clear sign, I was hoping when I did that exact experiment I would get my sign and know for sure. However, the sign didn’t come. But my intuition is still tugging me. Have you ever had that happen before? Even though I didn’t get that “clear sign” the new opportunity passes all of your steps and I feel such clarity right now. Maybe sometimes our minds keep us from seeing the “signs” and God puts people just like you in our lives so we get the nudge we need to move forward regardless. Thanks again! ~Ashley

  54. Marie-Eve

    I love this!!!! Exactly what I needed now!! I wish I came across such wisdom when I was younger. Ten years ago, at age 26, I decided to go to med school, since I wanted to be a doctor my whole life. I got invited to the interviews, but fear crept up on me… What if I failed, what if I made mistakes, what if, what if, what if… Unable to make a decision, I did not go to the interviews… I deeply regretted it and reapplied the next year, only to do the same thing, and ended up not going again! Then I created some excuses to justify theses decisions to myself… My husband and I wanted kids soon, etc… Anyway, we did not have kids for 5 more years… I totally would have had the time to do med school!!! And now, I am sure I would have been great at it, and a great doctor too. I wish I could go back. I ended up being a biologist. I love biology, but hate my specific job and sadly where I live there are no opportunities in this field. I am very lucky to have a job in biology. At the same time, I feel so stuck in my life. I have a mortgage, 2 kids, responsibilities. But I did your tests Marie, and I have decided to move forward with a career change. I don’t know the specifics yet, but I am done playing small and spending my life in my soul sucking job. I still have at least 30 years to work!! When I think about changing career, I feel scared, but exhilarated at the same time. I feel like I expand. I will learn to walk with the fear. Also, like you say, nothing is permanent. I might even go to med school, finally. The only thing that makes me hesitate to do med school now is that I adore my kids and don’t want to miss anything… dance recitals, school plays, being there when they are sick… That’s what making me hesitate! I also have lots of small business ideas that I would love to implement! We will see about that! But what I do know, is that I will register to b-school this year or the next! I have been dreaming about it for a while. And I know that this will be life changing, no matter what I end up doing!! Thanks so much for the inspiration!

    • Marevie Reflecta

      OMG your name is almost like mine just separated!!!! Mine is Marevie.

    • Verushka

      Reading your story was like reading my own story. I am 24, finally fed up of being in this soul-sucking engineering job. I want pursue commerce, I’m afraid I will fail or might not like it. I really do not enjoy my work, do you think I should just quit right away and than find something I might like, like in the bank or should I hang in there?

      • Caroline - Team Forleo

        Verushka, while reading your comment, I thought I might share another great MarieTV episode with some tips about taking the safe job or doing what you love: http://marieforleo.com/2012/01/safe-job-or-do-what-i-love/

        Another thing I thought I might mention is that it’s absolutely okay to start exploring new jobs without quitting outright, especially if you don’t want to do that yet or are not sure what to do next. You could try taking a part time job in the field you’re interested in, or meet up with some people who have the kinds of jobs you want to ask them about it. That way you could “taste test” to see if it’s a good fit before jumping in all the way.

        I hope this helps, and we’re cheering you on!

    • Schi

      You might miss a few recitals or ball games, but you might get something better in return. Imagine how much fun it would be for your kids to learn with you and help you with your homework. Maybe you could make it a family decision since whatever you choose to do will affect your entire family. And I would add that you may want to consider what you would like to teach your children for their lives. Best of Luck!

  55. Perfect timing! I have to come to a few decisions here in regards to my day job and it has been so bothering me. Thank you for this. You inspire me every day!

  56. Lília Finelli

    I do have a decision to make and was surprise to see that I did most of the things you said hahaha As a mental person, I always choose to do the physical test first, because it forces me to stay still and act with my sensibility. Then I’ll probably make a list, comparing worst and best case scenarios, but I do believe that, when I’m feeling torn, I always go for a try, because why not? None of the decisions were that big that could mess up with all my life anyways 🙂 By trying, I already found out most of the things I dislike and swear I loved it before. Thank you for your video! My last big decision was taking up a bridge job and you helped me so much to feel confident and not bad that I said yes.

    • Mandy - Team Forleo

      It’s so good to hear you’ve already been putting these tips into practice, Lília! And I’m really glad Marie’s videos have been helpful in the past. We appreciate you tuning in and letting Marie be a part of your world.

      • Lília Finelli

        Thanks Mandy!

  57. Great post. I really like the listing the best and worst case scenarios. I have never done that before and am going to try it next time I have a big decision to make.
    I read that one of the traits of successful people is that they are not afraid to make decisions. They don’t sit on ideas. Not all of the decisions they make are successful but the odds are much higher when you make more decisions than not making any at all. Knowing this has really helped me push myself to make decisions. I really like the last point you made that nothing is forever anyway that certainly can make it easier to make a decision.

  58. Lucia

    Marie, this was awesome! Thank you so much for the advice on decision making.

    Love, Lucia!

  59. OMG Marie & Team this episode is so timely for me!!! Here’s what’s I’m up to – I’ve decided to change my business target audience – the group I initially served when I started my business – I’ve been mulling over this decision for awhile, but uncertainty and fear kept me from taking action. Literally this morning after returning home from the gym, an inspired idea hit me like a love volt – the idea of who to serve – my new target audience. The thought gave me such joy & motivation to get into action…but of course as I thought about it more, uncertainty started setting in…then I watched this Marie episode WOW the voice of God speaking to me through Marie!! Hahaha

    So the tests I’m executing is the BCS & the Missy Elliot – “Work It.” The BCS for me is that I can actually start making difference for a community that inspire so many, while earning a consistent sustainable income in business.

    Thank you Marie & Team

    • Mandy - Team Forleo

      That’s so cool, Sheilah! Your target audience is super important, so I’m glad you got this jolt of clarity and inspiration. 🙂

  60. Barb

    Always love your episodes and what I continue to learn and relearn from you Marie.
    I love how your episodes reach all generations and I love the learn new perspectives from you. As a baby boomer, I’m continuing to reinvent myself in small ways and appreciate the enthusiasm you bring and also the hope you provide, that you can always reach your dreams. I needed this today……thank you!

    • Mandy - Team Forleo

      Thank you so much, Barb! We’re so glad you’re in the MF community. 🙂

  61. I’ve used the WCS test when deciding whether or not to make the leap to quit my full-time job (which I did in late 2014, and never looked back!). It was so helpful in framing the worst case scenario of my business not working out – i.e. going back to work in corporate and seeing that it wouldn’t be THAT bad if that happened.

    Right now in my business, we’re thinking about a big strategic decision and I’m definitely looking at the BCS approach. We’re thinking of bringing a portion of our production IN HOUSE. Best case scenario, we will have increased agility, better control over working conditions, quality and less inventory. Let’s do it 🙂

  62. Reinhard

    Decisions are mostly not relevant. You think you decide but mostly you act out of prejudices, learned ways to decide and act.
    So you’re not deciding you’re acting.

    • Steven

      Great! You’ve got it! Great insight.

  63. A few years ago I was offered what appeared to be an amazing opportunity. It came in a way that it even seemed Divinely orchestrated. I said YES! but then fear creeped in. Fear consumed me. Everyone told me to push through the fear and do it anyway but I couldn’t move beyond it. So I sat on the fence of non commitment for weeks hoping and praying for guidance which never came. The stress began to have its toll on me so I knew I had to make a descision so I could get the flow moving back in my life. I took my journal to the park, found a peaceful beautiful spot and bagan to write. First I asked my ego why she wanted me to do this. She had lots to say that made logical sense. Then I asked my soul, she had lovely heartfelt answers that also made sense. Then I asked my fear. I asked her what she was afraid of… And what came back surprised the hell out of me. In this process I realized that my fear, in this case, was instinctual not a egotistical, simple fear of failure or success like I thought would be revealed. Instead, she flat out told me! Basically she said, if I accepted this offer I would willingly be walking into the lion’s den and be “eaten alive”. Mic drop! I turned the offer down and then watched the others who had said yes, sell their souls to help this organization succeed on their backs without any pay off. Who knew fear had a voice? When I asked her, she spoke loud and clear and I will forever be grateful to my instinct for trying to reach me and that I paid attention.

    • Mandy - Team Forleo

      Sounds like your intuition was speaking loud and clear! What a powerful experience. <3

  64. This couldn’t have come at a better time. I’m in such a predicament! The Universe has provided me with two very wonderful studio options to start my business. Right off the bat, one feels more expansive (and is quite literally) and the other option feels less expansive but is in a prime location and has potential to be expansive with some energy work. I’m going to follow all of your little tricks and have faith I’ll be guided in the right direction. Maybe both are equally great?! Thanks again, Marie. (:

  65. Taylor Coen

    I really want to go back to school for my Teaching Certificate, so I can get into the Public School System and teach Kindergarten. The process is lengthy, expensive and time-consuming. I believe and know that it’s worth it, but it’s been stressing me out immensely. I’m worried about not getting everything done in time to schedule for the Fall Semester and that I’ll have to wait until the Spring to start taking classes for the Certificate. There are 4 tests involved and I have to get certain scores or higher on all four of them, I have to re-apply to the University which has a fee, I filled out paperwork to get extra time on the tests, because of my ADHD, and I have to fill out the application process online for the tests, to schedule them and pay for them. All of this has given me road blocks and I don’t want to wait until the Spring to start taking classes, because thinking about going back to school gives me enlightenment and the best feeling in the world, happiness. Thinking about trying this later in life brings me sadness and worries me more. I’m not sure what to do about how I feel with getting everything done. I’m frustrated and want it to be simpler. How do I deal with all of this emotion? Teaching with little kids is my life.

  66. Marie Sultana Robinson

    Loved it! Simple, yet profound. Worse case scenario in a current situation…. the person won’t talk to me. The best, he will. and since he’s already not talking to me, I’ve nothing to lose.
    Best to you,

    Marie Sultana Robinson

    • Mandy - Team Forleo

      Nothing to lose and everything to gain. <3

  67. ThatEllisWoman

    Thanks, Marie! This is total synchronicity as I’ve been trying to get clarity on a decision all morning. I have a full-time job that I love but I can see the end of my time here in the next year or so. I have dream work that I want to implement in the next two to five years that is my total heart’s desire. In the mean time I am looking at a side job selling a skin care line that I personally love and believe in as a way to generate cash for some things I want and need and to invest toward my dream work.

    The issue that has come up is whether the skin care line is 1) more work than I want to put into it since I have the full time job and am focusing on serious self-care this year, and 2) is it just a distraction and pulling me into an organization that isn’t totally my style. The bottom line is that I’m really looking at everything in my life right now and asking whether it makes me happy and is really “me” or not.

    The best case scenario with the skin care line is that it would provide a flow of income with only a few (2-4) hours of my time per week, and it would give me experience working with a primarily online business. Writing this out doesn’t give me the full clarity that I need, but it does show me what my next step is to get that clarity. I’ll try the other three steps and make a call to get some firm information and I think I’ll know.

    Thanks again!

    • Marie Sultana Robinson

      Sometimes with businesses like this, (MLM??) It’s helpful to ask people who’ve done it what the good and bad can be. Interview people who are successful and some that aren’t. Good luck, hope you find your bliss.

      Marie Sultana Robinson

      • ThatEllisWoman

        Thanks Marie. I did call my contact with the organization and got some great info from her. I’m stepping forward with a modified plan and feeling really good about it. Getting clear and getting my questions answered is allowing me to do this in alignment with my inner being.

  68. Suzanne

    Just this last week I went through this process, and my take-away from what I went through would be that I should have listened to my heart instead of my head. (My heart told me, “no, don’t do it,” but on paper, it seemed like a really great opportunity.) That being said, I guess I wouldn’t have truly known if I hadn’t given it a try!

  69. Great suggestions , especially your wcs and bcs . My best secnario is to give my best at my study’s ,

  70. I have terrible anxiety when I am not acting in alignment with the person I want to be, so I can always count on that to be there to tell me that something I am doing is off.

  71. I love these tips, what a great way to balance decision making skills. Usually if I feel fearful of a decision, I try to remember that sometimes its just ‘false evidence appearing real’ and facing it head on is better than not. If it wasn’t the best decision, I can always stop whatever it is Im doing if its not the right fit.

  72. I had a fear of going overseas, so booked the flights & made a few plans to go to South East Asia. I’m leaving in 8 days & right after booking felt a churning inside! Had I made the right decision?!
    Well, I’ve been getting insight into how to develop my brand called PANBAM, & am already taking more action which expands my potential to enhance the lives even before leaving the country. Ideas, dreams, relationships & my personal health have massive potential to improve.. exciting times!!!

  73. *BCS Test*
    Decision: Reach Out to Strangers to Enhance My Social & Professional Network.
    The Best Case Scenario of reaching out to people, that I want to be in my social and professional network, is that we could have a successful and stimulating relationship! We could create together, and in new ways I could grow and develop personally and professionally. They might even become lifelong friends or partners! It could be truly expansive for me to reach out and develop my social and professional network. YES. THAT COULD AWSOME =)

  74. Ellis Megee

    Hi Marie, this as always is a great segment.

    A few years ago I bought into a “new” idea that passed the first three tests. I absolutely knew this was for me. I just knew that I should faze out real estate and begin this new journey that will bring change to lives all over the world and I would be part of this great way to be, do and live.
    There wasn’t any way to get in the drivers seat and go for a cruise to see how I would like it.
    Once I “graduated” expensive training, rented space and set up shop and begin receiving clients, one of the first feelings was – do I really want to do this till I retire?
    Then the realization that this like other business dealing with people ‘one to one’ contact was messy but also very difficult to get new clients.
    There were other difficulties to but two which sank the ship were, a partner who I thought the world of suddenly became the opposite of the very process we were presenting to clients and the second was others who took the same training were struggling too and falling out.
    So I finally realized that real estate had a much brighter future than this new endeavor so I closed shop after earning about 10 cents on my investment dollar.

    Is there a way to know our own capabilities when we don’t know what our capabilities are?

  75. This is really brilliant Marie, and the most timely of all your videos for me – thank you!
    I recently weighed up a decision to change my role and needed to look within, to assess my motivation for changing ensuring it was the right fit for me as well as for the people who advertised the role as I respect them so much. As soon as I read the ad, it spelt and felt to me like ‘expansion’, ‘growth’, ‘adding value’, ‘this is what you’ve been calling in, without saying it out loud’ (haha), but at the same time I had a couple of ‘what if’s???’
    I have used best vs worst case scenario before to weigh decisions but, when you opened with the Expansion vs Contraction, that alone is a brilliant way of assessing what any opportunity presents for you. SO good! Love the way you brought in Missy E’s Work It to the message as well. She is one of my faves!!!
    Anyway, I applied and I have an interview today 🙂
    Thank you xx

  76. Anna Chargin

    All good tips from Marie, as usual. :_) TY!!!
    One thing that helps me is to put a timer on it. First, write down all things related to a decision and choose a direction to go in. Then sit with that decision for 48 hours. Experience the decision by observing what surfaces through emotions, body, mind and overall response for a few days. Then for the next 48 hours, make the opposite decision and again observe what comes up. In other words, test drive decisions before making it.

    • Mandy - Team Forleo

      That sounds like a really smart practice, Anna. Thank you for sharing it! 🙂

  77. Totally agree with Marie’s first point about listening to your body. I have really started to notice how my body reacts to certain situations. If something makes me feel tight and constricted, that is not good. There are several decisions I am dealing with, some personal and some professional. As far as the professional, I’m exploring some ideas to finally push forward with happy, healthy and hot and provide a product, rather than just the affiliate marketing. As far as best case scenario, I could help a ton of people look and feel amazing, make way more money than I am making right now, and be able to cut back on hours at my part time job (I love it and will never give it up, just don’t want to “need” it so much!)

  78. Rosa Brissos

    Every single cell in my body says yes…still I can’t get it dome. I procrastinate, I’m terrified…I postpone…I don’t know what to do anymore!

  79. Dawn Marie

    The BCS test ( my new favorite!)….I’ll love the new consulting assignment, making use of my years of experience and natural curiousity and we will have the extra $$ to find our dream home. Thanks Marie for providing clarity on how to break down what is involved in my decision and the reminder that I can always…stop/evolve or reverse- Perfect A to the Q. 🙂

  80. Kerri

    Oh, Marie, this episode came at the right time! I’ve been unhappy with my work situation for quite some time and haven’t done anything about it. It’s mainly because I didn’t know WHAT to do. I’ve been sort of passively looking for another job, but sticking it out while I figure out what I want to do.

    And here comes a big reorg at work. I’m going to sit down with my boss and her boss tomorrow to see my new job description and be asked whether I’m “…all in…” Well, I’ve decided that I’m not. I know what my job will entail and it doesn’t excite me.

    I don’t have a plan in place, which is very scary, especially since I have a child going off to college in the fall, and I’m the primary breadwinner in the family (medical benefits included). But I’ve been working on my art and holding a regular class at a rehab center. I want to do more of it. I know I’ll need another job to pay the bills, so I’ll find something in the meantime while I continue to find ways to incorporate art into my future fulfilling work situation.

    Thanks for all you do. I feel motivated and encouraged when I hear what you have to say!

  81. This is probably my favorite MarieTV episode! Indeed our life is the result of a series of decisions (yea I came up with that lol) This episode is filled with wonderful info. I like to start with the BCS (best case scenario) because if I start with the WCS (worst case scenario) I might never do it. However the most important test for me is the body intelligence…our body holds knowledge far superior to our minds because it stores everything about us before we were created and every experience we have had. I discovered this during coaching school in a module from one of Marie’s mentor Thomas Leonard (may he rest in peace).
    In good old Marie fashion I also host my own YouTube personal development show called LevantayTV and in one of my episodes I share how to believe in yourself when no one else does because sometimes we refuse to make certain decisions because we feel like we lack the support of others around us.

    Thanks for this Marie …especially love the Missy part … that’s my jam. xoxo.

    • Mandy - Team Forleo

      So true, Levantay! I love what you shared about how our bodies hold superior knowledge than our minds.

  82. Thomas

    I like to think of myself as an 85-year-old in a rocking chair looking back at my life, and ask what decision I’ll look back and be most happy with, no matter the outcome. 🙂

    I’m thinking through how to spend my Saturday night; I could accept an invitation to teach, 0r I could work on my nascent business. There are advantages to both, but I feel the BCS of working on my business is that I start making good financial steps forward and can start working on my own timetable instead of having to go to the office at a particular time every morning. Can’t wait to get earn the worth of what I’m contributing and to sleep in a bit more.

  83. I am 30 and I have been wanting to successfully own and operate my own business (of course I want to be successful, who doesn’t) selling my photographs/images. It is my true gift. You say there is that one thing that you were created to do, and I believe I have found it. Though, I do not have the knowledge of where to properly start. I have a FB page, Capturing Moments, where I share my images, but I need to start selling. I know you said to ask yourself what would be the worst/best case scenario to do something, but what if you don’t even know what that step is that you need to ask yourself, is this the right thing or the wrong thing to do. Ahhhh I am stuck.

    • Ashleigh!

      I have my own business illustrating and designing invites and other paper goods for weddings and other special occasions. You sound like me when I first started. I had no idea how to share my work, but I think a good way to expose your work is through your FB or Instagram. When I started sharing my work, I offered making personalized greeting cards or custom portraits. You’ll be surprised to see how many people will respond. I highly you share your work with your friends and maybe put a working price on your service. Maybe it’s a 30 min session for family portrait. I don’t know, but just putting your toes in the water will be a great step!

      Great Luck!

    • Caroline - Team Forleo

      Ashleigh, it’s wonderful to hear that you’ve found something you love to do, and that you’re looking to start selling your work.

      We have some incredible MarieTV episodes about building a business you love, so feel free to explore this great playlist for some helpful tips as you’re getting started: https://www.marieforleo.com/category/build-a-meaningful-business/

      I also thought I might mention we have some great free business training available right now as part of our B-School launch, so you might like to check that out for some great tips if you haven’t already (joinbschool.com).

      We’re cheering you on and wishing you so much success in growing your business!

  84. Ana Carvalho

    Excellent Q&A! I couldn’t ask for better!

    I am going through a major career decision: either I go through more studies to keep this job (mid term), or I make some radical career change, to something I have never done or studied before – but this option appears to be more secure long term than my current career.
    I am not as sure about the current job being my life purpose as I was before… I am trying both scenarios out, and really pay attention to how they feel in my body (developing my current career and try different things) and it seems the second is more in tune with my personality than the first, even if it means working from scratch!
    I will try these 4 tests out!
    Thank you for the wonderful insight! 🙂

  85. wow. Marie, I’ve never made it past WCS. Actually, it’s the WCS that has held me all in one piece. I’ve been doing the exercise for more than I can remember and I’ve trained my daugther to do the same which I feel is “Embrace the change and feel it”. I often have to rely on my gut feeling in my super–competitive, extra-ego-centered work enrivornment and I’ve came to abhor the feeling of waking up early with the gut feeling that something’s wrong. Now I’ve learnt to trust my intuition and make sure that I have all ends covered – still, thank you for bringing it up and sharing it. Now, every time my teenage daughter has a problem, we talk and I tell her to image the WCS and then go to BCS and it WORKS.

  86. Summer

    Hi Marie! My dilemma today is choosing which job to go for. Is it the one whose work I love doing BUT the boss is someone I’ve had some not so great professional history with OR is it the job with THE great boss but the work is a bit “meh”. I’m currently out of work so I really do need to choose one for practical reasons. Thanks and hope to hear what you and your followers have to say.

    • Caroline - Team Forleo

      That’s a great question, Summer! I hope the tips in this episode can help you tease this out a bit more. I also thought I’d pass along another great MarieTV episode about choosing between various business opportunities. The topic is a little bit different than your question specifically, but it might spark a few ideas for you as you’re deciding what might be the best fit for you: http://www.marieforleo.com/2016/02/safe-or-inspiring/

      We’re cheering you on and sending our best no matter what you decide!

  87. Sylvie

    Deciding on a completely life-changing scenario: divorce. I feel that I should, and I feel expansive and lighter about it. However, the WCS is unbearable: loss of children’s love and respect, or psychological issues with them that need to be addressed. :-/
    Any advice?

    • Caroline - Team Forleo

      Sylvie, that’s such a difficult question, and there’s definitely a lot to consider when the decision you’re contemplating can affect others in your life who are close to you – especially children.

      Divorce and major changes to your relationships or family life can be difficult to navigate, but if a divorce is ultimately the best solution, it can be approached with as much sensitivity and care as possible to help everyone involved cope and heal.

      In situations like this, we recommend getting in touch with a trained professional, perhaps a counselor or a therapist, who can help you navigate these tough times – especially together with your partner if they’re willing. They’ll best be able to guide you and offer specific support.

      Please know that we’re sending so much love your way and hope that you find the right solution for you.

  88. Jenny

    Oh, this is good, Marie! Most timely for this waffling individual. I just had the best time writing out the worst case scenario that’s been hanging out in my subconscious for years. And once I wrote it out, I laughed, because it’s so absurd that much, if any, of it would actually happen. And then the best case scenario just flowed. Now I don’t expect it all to play out that way – but it could! And if only part of the BCS happened, it’d be so much better than where I am now.

  89. Mary

    I like the expand/contract method best. But The best case scenario is one that I don’t always do. I think this can reveal a whole different fear for people. For me the best case scenario would be that I live the lifestyle I have been dreaming of. Success can be scary. I may lose friends or people may think less of me.

  90. Robin

    If the decision will make me happy then, I will do it. Right now I have a big decision to make about applying for an apartment out of state. I don’t have the proof of income to apply for the apartment but I have the security deposit. I hope my friend will help me by applying for the place with me, even though he doesn’t want to go with me. Within two months when the apartment is ready for me to move in that I will have the income and all the money that I need to move. I feel that if I don’t take this risk now that the opportunity may not come again any time soon. I have been trying to move out of state for the past 25 years and something always gets in the way of me moving. Losing a job, no money, not able to get a job, people saying they will help and then don’t or me getting ill. If everything works out than I will have accomplished one goal this year. Living in another environment, I believe will be better for me and my new career.

    • Caroline - Team Forleo

      I hope everything works out for you, Robin! We’re sending our best wishes your way 🙂

  91. Romain

    Good day Marie.
    1) My specific method to take decisions comes partly from my Dad, who believed in the Jesuits way of thinking: Take the decision in your mind and let your spirit feel through it over a period of time. The light comes a little later. It also comes partly from R.M. Rilke who advised his students to “live the question”, rather than to look for the answer.
    I have the feeling that both approaches connect to the 4 steps you highlighted. Giving it some time leaves an area for the body and the mind to express themselves over the idea. It then takes some skills and practice to listen to the answers that come from within.
    2) I am currently considering moving back to my home country (France) from Australia, with my family. Of course, the decision has as many sides as a polished diamond, or at least more than two. (It is definitely not a coin with only two sides to it…)
    BCS screams at me that I will get a job that comes in as some sort of a reward for all the things I learnt since I moved to Australia, including financially. I will probably be able to buy a house that suits my family and our many activities. (Our children don’t go to school, which is very tightly and harshly controlled in France, no matter how hard associations and groups fight for freedom)
    I will be able to re-connect with my siblings on a regular basis, and our children will be able to see each-other more often than every other year – at great expenses in plane tickets… for us -. I will be able to re-connect with friends with which I have been blessed to stay in touch over 10 years!
    I will be able to walk back in our cultural habits that we so dearly miss: Walk to a bakery and get a baguette and two croissants for our Sunday breakfast. (And Monday’s, and Tuesday’s and Wednesday’s as well… you get the idea!
    Go to a local cheese shop and choose between 200+ varieties of fresh goodness. Visit Europe in short haul flights, when 4 hours of flight does not even get you out of Australia!!!
    My partner and I are contemplating a world of wonders, which helps us keep an optimistic eye on the fact that in the short term, at least, we will start over socially in a city (that we haven’t chosen yet!!!) where we don’t know anybody. We will have to live through the struggles of the Administration to come back to life into the Social Security: register or get registered, subscribe, wait, iterate. (lost files…)
    We’ll survive, because we’re from there, even though we know we will have to rediscover our country. That definitely sits in the B- and the W-CSs.
    Sincerely yours,
    R

  92. Excellent breakdown and tips. Have been listening your your Tuesday treats for for awhile now. But I gotta say this one in particular was right to the point. Great, simple techniques that cover the bases when having to make a BIG decision. Thank you, Marie!

  93. Hey Marie!

    Thank you so much for this episode! You never fail to encourage me. I big reason why I started my business was because I began watching you. A few years ago, I was really unhappy at my job, but during that time I rekindled my passion for art. I had this “gut” feeling that something needed to change. The expansion that you mentioned in the beginning is exactly what I was feeling, I needed to go and I need to pursue art! I was very nervous leaving a steady job to pursue a passion. I kept playing every scenario in my head, and it only gave me a headache. I knew that the best way I can gain clarity was to pray for guidance and to engage in this passion and see if more doors opened for me. 3 years later, my business is growing. Definitely a lot of work and a lot of growing pains, but I don’t regret a thing. New goals are arising, so more decision making, and more engagement! ahah

    Again, thank you so much for your insights. Your videos always brighten up my day.

  94. Marie, you are the single most important, most influential person to have come into my life in recent years. I want to thank you from the bottom of my heart for everything you’ve allowed me to nurture in my business and personal life. I felt every part of myself expand when I thought about taking B-School in 2013 and I have continued to feel this growth and joy in my life ever since. Ever gratefully yours, KT x

    • Caroline - Team Forleo

      KT, thank you so much for your kind words. We’re so glad to have you in our beautiful community, and we’re honored that our work has been a source of inspiration on your journey! ♥

  95. Hong Anh Doan

    Hi Marie, thank you so much for this inspiration Q&A section. The four tests you shared are really helpful. I am considering the decision of open a flower shop and it comes just in the right time to apply.
    Best, Hong Anh.

  96. Thank you for another great episode, Marie & Team! I do the Physical Test all the time when making decisions and it’s amazing the clarity I get just from that. You know something I’ve realized about decisions, intuition, and fear? For me, it comes down to how I feel when I first hear about the option. If my first gut reaction is excitement and a big “YES!”, then I go for it. Even if I start to feel afraid later on, that’s just my comfort zone being stretched a little (and a quick physical test check-in will confirm that for me.) If my first gut reaction is a “Nope, not for me” then I don’t need to try to talk myself into the option no matter how happy it would make my Great Aunt Edna. Get my point? Remember: it’s completely possible – and normal – to get the green light from your body during a Physical Test and still be stomach flopping, sweaty palms nervous at the same time. It’s a great sign that you’re doing something big. 😊

  97. I totally, 110% needed this today! I took notes and plan to try this system out. Thank you so much!

  98. Tanya

    Love the advice and Missy has so many nuggets of wisdom.

  99. Pam

    Your videos are always so damn cute!

  100. Nancy

    Marie,
    Great Q & A, as always. I agree with the contractive/ expansive test although I think it’s a fine line… Sometimes I get an uncomfortable gut feeling when considering an idea- but it’s really coming from my HEAD, in that case, if I feel a bit contractive in my body, it’s not really accurate . Does that make sense? We have to learn understand the difference between our mind setting up barriers from fear and that authentic icky gut feeling that comes when something is just not right. It’s not the same, but it’s hard to explain! The more we tune in and get to know ourselves, the easier it is to tell the difference.
    My current dilemma. I want to own a B & B, and I know I would be great at it (and all of my friends agree, but it’s a big financial commitment/risk so I am a big fat fraidy-cat and haven’t moved forward. Wish me luck as I work through it!
    To to R- I just did something similar, I left France after many years and move back to the U.S. for some family reasons. It’s been a year now and I have a job and fit more or less back into my culture, but I also really miss France, and am thinking about buying a BnB there. (Vive la France!)

  101. I’ve been training myself on listening to my intuition and for decisions where I feel stuck these days I flip an oracle card. It’s usually then I feel either the expanse or the contract! Slightly woo but still working!!

  102. Thanks Marie to give an opportunity to communicate with you. I am somehow blessed all through my life even in worst of scenarios. Many positive health care philosophies of my life lead me to Bruce Lipton’s works. That lead me to Gregg Braden, which in turn brought me to amazing “Marie TV”, discovering through one of your shows with Gregg Braden. I am always a big dreamer and have passion for big challenges and innovations. Had a successful career in Energy Industry for over 37 years.
    My decision making is mostly informed (I always seek for knowing), but finally driven by my passion and my inner call in specific cases of opportunities and situations of failures. I practiced strategy consulting for very long and love to work with scenario planning and course corrections en-route. So I don’t look back much and go ahead with current passion first. But few other big ideas call me for taking them up, but i store them for the next big project.
    Currently bootstrapping on a Holistic Health and Wellness Startup with cutting edge Point of Care (POC) Diagnostics Technology tie up. Also working on a mobile App for comprehensive monitoring and feedback of Holistic Healthcare interventions, especially in Rural India. Preparing to pitch for initial phase funding and to various Government agencies for implementation supports. Some of the exciting payoffs are – The project has very large potential to touch the lives of Rural population with effective low cost Integrative and Complementary Healthcare solutions. Moreover, will have opportunity to be an integral part of the Healthcare Mission of Government of India. This will also have substantial earning potential in future.

  103. This is another great one, Marie! Another tool I use, I addition to the wonderful ones you mentioned, is asking “who says?” Or in other words, are you deciding based on what you want, or what you think (or what you think others think) that you SHOULD do. We often go into a decision process with a lot of assumptions about what should happen or what others think, and if we ask “Well, who says I should? Is this about what I want?” it can at least make that first step more clear (like you mentioned in #4). Replacing “should” with “want” in the language I use makes a huge difference in my day to day life and my bigger decisions. It also helps many of my therapy clients who struggle with anxiety, because the “shoulds” we tell ourselves can keep us very stuck in worry and doubt.
    Thanks for another awesome video! I can’t wait for this next round of B-school as an alumni again, btw! Lots of love to you.

  104. Anonymous

    I was referred this link today and I have to admit that I’m disgusted by the amount of help certain family members keep pushing when I already have made a decision. In other words, they are pushing me to change my decision, supposedly because I made a poor decision to myself. That I look sad, and not all that ‘Wow’ in life…. Maybe you could help me with this, how is it wrong to have made what feels like a right decision, but have family keep telling me otherwise. Manipulation? Wanting the right things for me, like I deserve better?

    • Caroline - Team Forleo

      Hi there, thank you so much for checking out our episode, and I’m sorry to hear that you’re being pushed by others in directions that don’t feel right to you.

      So often people in our world mean well when they offer suggestions, but ultimately we’re all responsible for our own happiness and the decisions we make. We did another great episode a while back about defining success for yourself no matter what the world says, so that might be a great one to check out: http://www.marieforleo.com/2015/03/definition-of-success/

      Another helpful episode is this one about naysayers and how you can use even negative feedback as fuel to help you move toward the life of your dreams: http://www.marieforleo.com/2014/10/naysayers/

      I hope that helps, and thanks so much for tuning in!

  105. Jamie

    This is exactly what I need at this moment,
    Thank you, it helped me a lot! I am going to apply the ways you shared in my life.

  106. Verushka

    Well this episode finds me when I have to make a few major decisions in my life. My anxiety will definitely not allow me to do the first test. The other tests could be very useful. I studied engineering and have been working as an engineer for the past 2 years. Lately I do not enjoy my work have found myself wanting pursue finance and dance which are my passions. I am afraid though that it might not work out and I will be jobless. I am also afraid people might view me as weak for quitting engineering even if I already have my degree. I also want to move out of my parents home, because the environment has a bad influence on me. So my 3 major decisions that I have to make are:
    1. Quitting my job
    2. Moving out
    3. Pursuing my passion

  107. Ray

    This has come at the right time. I took some time out of work and worked on creating my business. I’ve had some success and I know I could have more if I wasn’t working my job. So I’ve been mulling over the decision to leave or not to leave and tomorrow is decision day! The Best Case Scenario thing really helped!

  108. Aleks

    Hi Marie, a great episode! Funny enough, a few days before watching this one I had decided that if I go for coaching business, making decisions/choices will be one if my specialities! 🙂 I love all the strategies you talk about, and the first one plus the last one are my favourites – because I naturally do so much thinking that when this itself doesn’t give me a clear answer, I need to get out of my head and listen to sensations in my body :-).
    I wrote decisions/choices and they are “same same, but different” – as they say in Cambodia. Every decision is a kind of choice, and decisions you focus on in this episode are of the Yes or No kind. Go for sth or not? These are seldom my personal struggle. My huge challenge in life is that I say or want to say YES to way too many huge things at the same time, and decisions I need to make are usually choices between all the great, tempting options. Which of them do I want to go for? And which ones need to be sacrifised or at least wait until another fase of my life? It would be great to get your insight on this kind of dilemmas. Love, Aleks

    • Caroline - Team Forleo

      I so hear you, Aleks – you’re absolutely not alone there! We did a great MarieTV episode a while back on how to prioritize and stay focused, especially if you find yourself saying yes to too many things: http://www.marieforleo.com/2014/02/how-to-stay-focused/

      That’s such a great episode, so I hope it helps as you’re deciding which tasks to take on and say yes to. I personally always find it helpful to remember that if I say “yes” to one thing, that means saying “no” to something else. So making sure that your “yes’s” are aligned with your biggest dreams and goals can help a lot!

  109. You’re so funny Marie 😂
    These videos always come at the right time for me, thank you ❤️️

  110. So I have public speaking fear… it’s incredibly bad. Weird heartbeat, lots of sweating and I have been known to make a fool of myself in the past. So, that’s clearly my worst case scenario but with practice, my best case scenario, is being far more confident and spreading my message about my passion far and wide. I just need some guts to force myself to say “yes” when I really want to cave into my fear.

    • Caroline - Team Forleo

      Sarah, I know you’re SO not alone there! We actually did a great MarieTV episode a few years ago about public speaking with Marie’s fiance Josh. It’s one of my all time favorite episodes, and Josh is an absolute genius in this area, so I thought you might like to check that one out for some incredible strategies: http://www.marieforleo.com/2013/03/overcome-fear-shyness-josh-pais/

  111. Oh Marie – I really loved this video!

    I’m a storm-trooper with decision-making… BUT the second point you made, I don’t have a habit of writing out the worst case scenario – I let it simmer there and turn into a bit of a beast in very big decision-making moments.

    My decision-making and passion and visionary aspects are very integrated into my life and work, and I jump into new projects very easily – and it has put me out on a limb many times, and put me through periods of extreme vulnerability – but this thinking-through more methodically is something I could benefit from hugely, thank you…

    Sometimes it’s the simplest things. 🙂 I love getting older, and wiser… 😀

  112. Great episode! Thanks!
    I use the physical body test most often if the decision is important, but also love the other tests you suggest.
    The best case scenario test tells me this:
    If I say yes to teaching enameling classes in my studio these are the BCS results:
    – It will get me in the studio Every day!
    – My work each day will be related directly to my fine art.
    – I will have one main focus in my art career, rather than being split between fine art and graphics, (expansive vs contractive)
    – I will make income regularly from sharing this incredible medium of applying enamel (glass) onto steel in form of pendants, panels and (for the more advanced students) sculpture!
    – best case: I will create a community of enamelists here in my home town!
    – best best case: I will educate the public about the complexity of this medium, and create more interest and therefore increase the perceived value and desire for my art.
    Yes! yes!!! yes!!! and yes!!!

    ok, I admit I have not yet taken a look at he worst case, but I will. Thank you Marie!!

  113. D

    Thank you for this. Even though I’m familiar with articles about intuition it was timely to have it placed in my lap. I’m trying to get back into the job market if only to get some energy and inspiration from it. At this stage I should be doing my own thing but I don’t have any ideas. What ever I do has to be for the next year at least so I don’t want to get involved in something that’s wrong as opposed to okay. So I was aware of my need for tune into any intuition I have and this was a perfect reboot. I really appreciate your generosity.

    Thank you so much.

  114. Hi Marie,
    I have written a book recently about living as a creative parent (I have five children and I am a working artist). I have had an invitation to go to Hong Kong (I live in Australia) to talk about my book and do some workshops. I have been struggling to decide what to do, as it means a week away from my kids and my youngest is only two. Thank you for this post. It has given me the clarity I need to say YES I will come. I wrote the book to encourage other parents to continue with their creative pursuits and so that is what I am going to do!
    Thanks Marie, I always seek you out, when I have to “figure something out”..
    Keep up the good work..
    Jasmine X

  115. Sumbul

    Thank you Marie TV.
    I think clearly one of the beauties of what makes almost every email of your’s worth reading, is that you somehow get the timing right.
    I was currently mulling over this big decision that I have to make; and a few weeks earlier, my friend (who subscribed to you after I helped her out by sharing another one of your emails) was going through a tough time, and then she showed me the email she got from you that resonated with her so much!

    I remember how you mentioned that your mother said that a lot of things you say are just ‘common sense’. While that is partly true (:P), what separates you from the rest is your deep research into whatever you talk about, getting the timing right, your whole ‘user experience’ thing. From a business perspective, you have a great marketing team honestly; I had subscribed to your emails even before I saw any of your videos. And I love this comment box too; the cursor is slightly longer and it feels so nice while it awaits my next words. And of course, video quality is great, the whole ambience is good, and you’re intonation fluctuations are so cute! (makes one re-concentrate if the mind goes wandering as usual)

    Well, basically I just wanted to say that this video was great. Thank you. I’ve written it down in my SNote and will do each one properly so that I can reach the right decisions.

    Until next time!

    • Caroline - Team Forleo

      Sumbul, thank you so much for your kind words. We so appreciate hearing that you enjoy our work, and that this video arrived at a great time for you in particular. We love having you in our beautiful community!

  116. Ha!!! Loved when you read from the book of Missy Elliott!!! You rule!

    • Caroline - Team Forleo

      Classic Marie moment 😀

  117. What have a told you about reading my mind Marie!

    Thank you x

    • Caroline - Team Forleo

      Haha, love it, Kate! Marie definitely has a “mind reading” knack 😉

  118. Kim

    I have a magnet on my fridge that says “what would you do if you knew you could not fail?” I find that often what I am feeling fear.

  119. Thank you Marie!! This is so great. I am two weeks away from moving across the country to be closer to my boyfriend and family, quitting my job, and starting the business I’ve been dreaming about. As you can imagine, I have so much anxiety and fear over this, but talking about the best case scenario (I can start my own family and run a business I love)made it clear that this is the right decision, and I am so excited about it! Thanks for the great guidance.

    • Caroline - Team Forleo

      Wow, so exciting, Brittany! We’re cheering you on and wishing you the best for your upcoming transition. 🙂

  120. Maggie B

    I’ve decided to move on from my current position in a larger business to a different field in a smaller office. The transition doesn’t make much sense to my coworkers but the payoff in time, sanity and finances is just too enticing to pass up. Although I’m terrified that I’m leaving a good thing, my BCS and WCS tests are always helpful. We always assume change will bring something ‘less than,’ when in fact the opposite is so much more likely. If all else fails, recognizing that there is always a choice can make any decision feel less permanent and therefore less scary.

  121. I think I have the opposite problem! Sometimes I think I get to excited for new ideas and new projects and I say “this is the one” and when I decide to go through it it doesn’t work or I actually don’t like it… And now I don’t know when I get a new idea if it’s my intuition or just my Ego trying to make something “tracendental” or meaningful again. My new years resolution was to stop making project decitions until I learn to here my intuition again…

  122. Idan Vaitzner

    Amazing. It works also to bring calm to a decisions you allready made. I decided to start a new course that will help me to take my business to a new level. The course will start in a week from now and my fears started to show up! I doubted if it was the right decision in the right time (it cost a lot of money and my wife is not sure about it).
    When I did the exercise it was clear that I made the best decision I can make and it put me again on my track!
    It made me calm to know what I will do if something willl fail and then imagine all the transitions and great things that can happen in my life when it will secceed!

  123. Laura

    YOU ARE ABSOLUTELY AMAZING MARIE. I can be in the worst mood ever and watch your videos and suddenly feel empowered, happy, and ready to “work it”. XOXO, Laura

    • Caroline - Team Forleo

      Oh, you’re so sweet, Laura! Thank you so much for your lovely comment. We’re honored to have you tuning in with us for little pick-me-ups when you need them! ♥

  124. Jessica Johnsen

    This video could not have been more timely for me. The first point was interesting, because fear can sometimes make me contract = but over the past day I’ve tuned in right away to my reaction, which is expansive. If I think about it too much though, it will turn to contracting. But that’s when I’m in a conscious mind and body. I think that it will be a practice to be listening to my body.
    Writing down the WPS and the BPS were super helpful.

    Thanks always Marie! You have given me more than you know. 🙂

  125. Liz

    I love the 4 test system-particularly paying attention to your physical body language. I think body language can provide major intuition but often gets overlooked.

  126. Jennifer Mullins

    I have decided to quite my job and do freelancing so that I can build my own clientele. It is scary! This segment comes at the right time. Thank you! Best Case scenario: Potentially make more money, be independent, gain more knowledge and skills of running a business. Worst Case scenario: Go back to being an employee making less money and being more dependent on an employer. Losing money because of the wrong choice. Wish me luck!

  127. yacine

    Hello thank you so much for all vvhat you had been giving and are still giving. In this topic sometimes i can’t guess that my decision is good or no and this due to many factors like experience , unpredictable circumstances ..ect. it hasn’t relation vvith inside feeling or vvell estimating my decision. As muslim vve have another good solution is that vve do all vvhat you have presented in your video but other helpful act is to pray for GOD to lead you to the best solution as he the best acquainiter about vvhat vvould be happening in future. and really it s alvvays the true vvay .vvhat do you think. last thing . really you are soo stunning. THANK YOU AGAIN.

  128. This video definitely came a super timely moment. I’ve been smack in the middle of “should I, shouldn’t I?” situation for the last year, nearly. I’ve been at my current job for almost six years and for the last two I’ve hated it. The environment has been extremely toxic, and psychically it’s weighed on me a lot. But I didn’t know what I wanted to do, and the money is good, so I stayed. And then I determined that I wanted to go to school for health coaching and start my own business, which lit me up like crazy. So I’m nearly graduated and it’s very clear that starting my business is going to take longer than I originally though. It’s my first foray into entrepreneurship and it’s taking me a second to get it all together. But meanwhile, I feel so deeply under-fed by my job. My big conundrum right now is: do I quit, without any backup, and commit to two months of deep dive work into my business + looking for another job in the health coaching field, or do I stay and suffer it out and wait until my business is off the ground (which, realistically, could be years). My gut (and tests 1-3) tell me to quit, because no matter what happens in my life I make shit happen and I feel this could be extremely empowering for me. There’s the pesky note of fear that always creeps in about money, stability, etc. My best case scenario feels completely magical to me: time to actually work on my business, time to actually look for a job that feeds me, a much-needed break in my current hustle to get things done, enjoy some freelance work and play around with different industries and job opportunities, rid myself of an insanely toxic environment, an opportunity to dive deep into this huge change in my life, and the peace and quiet to actually focus, instead of trying to fit the work of building my business into any spare moment I have free. Whew! This is a lot. It felt good to go through this exercise. In every way my gut, and the tests, said, “QUIT!”

    • Caroline - Team Forleo

      Amanda, thank you so much for your note and for sharing your thoughts with us. Getting started in business is never easy, and kudos for you to diving in and following your dreams! As Marie often shares, working a part-time job or “bridge” job to help support you as you’re growing your business can be a great strategy, so if you do decide to quit and find a job that aligns better with you, that’s definitely an option.

      I also thought I might mention that we have some great free business training available right now (for a limited time), so you’re welcome to check that out here if you’re interested: http://marieforleobschool.com

      We also have lots of great MarieTV episodes about building a business, so feel free to explore our library anytime!

  129. Carolina

    Hi Marie!
    I’m really glad to have found your page and your channel! 🙂 You’re hilarious! Very creative and easy to connect with.
    I’m in the middle of one of the toughest decision I’ve ever faced in my profesional career. I think I found my “true calling” but on the same token, I have a very good-paid office job (translation: i’m very comfy in my confort zone). I just had a baby which makes this decision more difficult for me. But I’m really inspired by your video! I will think about it and be back with my answers! thanks so much for touching our lives in a very positive way, even without noticing 🙂

  130. Adrianna

    Do these methods work for relationships, particularly with a significant other?

    • Caroline - Team Forleo

      I think they absolutely can, Adrianna! Thinking of worst and best case scenarios can do wonders when we’re considering changes in our relationships, or changes that might affect our partners. Give it a try if there’s a big decision you’re considering and see if it helps! You could even try out our tips with a partner too.

  131. Auburn

    Yes, I agree. Thank you so much for sharing!

    I’ve been working corporate jobs (9-5) since I was 18. I’m now 24 and I’m so hungry for change. I want my freedom and time back to continue to grow my life coaching business so that I am able to help others in a greater way.

  132. Annika

    This video is good and hard at the same time. I have just taken a big decision and already with test 1 I feel like…girl, you have had this tight feeling in your chest from the beginning on and see: it did not really go until today. I should have known. I have started a yoga teacher training that is 4 years long. And costs some money of course. And my head said: well, this is one of the best trainings you can have, its traditional, its with very dedicated teachers. But the freedom loving voice of my heart was wispering: but something is not right. It is not YOUR place.
    Not sure what to do now, but for sure start to listen to my heart even more from now on! Thanks to Marie and Team

  133. Down Low

    Actually, writing down your worst fears/worst case scenario is a bad practice for law of attraction! It is good to think of the worst, know how you would feel then STOP! Not sure why it is recommended to write the worst and not the best case scenario? Writing down a possible bad future is only going to attract it to you.
    Basic law of attraction.

    • Caroline - Team Forleo

      Thanks so much for sharing your comment with us, and I’m happy to clarify our tip a little further. While the tips we shared here aren’t fully based on the Law of Attraction, we would never recommend dwelling on “worst case scenarios” or writing them down to cause unnecessary worry or concern.

      The tip we suggest here is to think of what the worst could happen if we make a certain decision, then write down very specifically how you would handle it. So even if the worst case DID happen, we have a strategy in mind already to move past it and keep moving toward our dreams.

      The second tip focuses solely on the best case scenario, which is definitely something we DO want to attract to us.

      I hope that helps clarify, and thanks so much for watching!

  134. Lauren

    I like to take time, meditate, journal, etc. It helps me clear my thoughts and get through the fear and panic – which I’ve found are more physical reactions than true intuition.
    Right now, I’m considering whether or not to quit my job to travel and indulge in my creative pursuits. BCS: I will have the time, space and freedom to get my creative projects truly off the ground. I could finally find my footing and feel more comfortable around my purpose. I would really be living a dream – I’ve put off traveling for the last 10 years, the real way I wanted to. I of course would learn a ton about myself, and grow, by facing down these fears — and even by getting through the things I’m worried about (getting out of the job market, potential discomfort while traveling, etc.) I like the idea of twisting those to ‘lessons.’
    I’ve also noticed a lot of stories lately about super-successful people who gave themselves no safety net (like a day job) and that’s what spurred them on to the “legend” status we know them as today.
    Thanks!

  135. Kirsten

    Hi Marie,

    I absolutely love this! Often, I will check in with my gut and see if it’s saying yes or no – contracting or expanding, and respond in kind. I often create issues for myself creating big best case scenarios in my head without balancing them with worst case scenarios (0r at least…that’s what people say). I’ll act on impulse. Which often leads to wonderful happy things. But, it scares other people around me who aren’t as “wild,” and they try to reign me back into their comfort zone. I most often docilely comply.

    I find it frustrating, when I have to give facts, figures, and analysis with professional opinions to others in order for them to come to a decision – because, my sense of yes and no is so strong, I often just know what my answer is. I don’t need volumes of supporting data.

    I respect that different people need different things. I try to work with other people and their needs. But, even just in writing this I am noticing the conflict I have been overlooking. How do I assert myself in a “managing up” sort of way without compromising my own intuition?

    • Caroline - Team Forleo

      Kirsten, thank you so much for sharing your thoughts here. Asserting yourself is a great thing, and if your intuition is speaking up, it can be important to make your thoughts known.

      One way you might approach this is (as you mentioned) to honor what might resonate with other people. If you’re bringing a concern to someone who relies heavily on facts and figures, perhaps you could come up with a bulleted list of some concrete evidence or examples to back up your gut feelings. That way you’re honoring yourself, but also speaking “their language.”

      I also thought I might share this great other MarieTV episode with guest Bob Burg, as it’s wonderful for asserting yourself and winning people over. I hope you enjoy it and find it helpful: http://www.marieforleo.com/2014/11/win-people-over/

  136. Daniella

    Thanks Marie!! Very good advises… When I have doubts about doing something I really think if it is worthy… The best way to know the answer is to imagine the outcome of doing it… I consider myself as a doer with no much thinking about different scenarios about a decision … I have seen a lot of people thinking to much about something and then not doing anything. Advise: if you want to do something … go for it.

  137. Awesome article!

  138. BCS: Finally – finally – allowing myself to live my life and not the life someone else demands/ wants/ expects of me! Finally using my creative talents & communication skills in positive service to others. Finally feeling that I’m doing what I’m meant to do after decades of letting others be in control. The hardest part: I’m in a relationship that allows me to live a very enriched life, one that people envy. We live part time in two countries, in stunning properties. We have a yacht & travel to exotic places to scuba dive. We drive a couple of amazing vehicles. I don’t worry about money and am covered with an excellent health insurance plan (which is great, as a cancer survivor). But, inasmuch as my life is blessed, and I take none of it for granted, I live it on someone else’s terms. And at 50, I feel time rushing past and know that, if I don’t take the chance now, which means giving up all the above, I will live with deep, dark regrets. Your 4 tests, Marie, came at a pivotal time! I know that every time I think about what I want to do I feel an incredible expansion through my entire being!

    • Caroline - Team Forleo

      Living a life on our own terms is incredible, Beth – I think at heart we all want that freedom more than anything. Thanks so much for sharing, and we’re sending all of our best wishes your way as you’re considering possible next steps!

  139. This came into my inbox at just the right time (I’m in the throes of making a big decision about where to live). Love that there were numerous tests- ordinarily the body test works well for me but sometimes when there are so many variable factors you need more tools to break it down. Thank you!!

  140. Michelle

    I’ve recently come across a heavy decision. I took a job as a marketing manager and strategist, but because the level of the business is small, I just had to take over small tasks that need to be done which left the strategy on hold.
    That wouldn’t be a problem, but a very good friend lost her job and surprise! my boss took her in our team, taking a part of my tasks and gave them to her. This wasn’t actually something bad, but the context in which i received the news was not a favourable one for me. Suddenly, from the position that I was controlling things, she kinda became my boss. I was very upset, first beacuse i did not get the chance to proove myself on the strategy side and of course, because i took over the small tasks, she has the time to just think things.
    So, after watching your video I realised I already took the BCS and the WCS tests. And that helped me adopt a different attitude towards the situation. And just beacuse of that, things are starting to fall into place, for now.
    WCS means it’s not my place there and something greater awaits.

  141. The decision I am struggling with at the moment is not so much of saying yes to something but saying no to something else.
    If I say no to what I have previously been doing, and change my business, the BCS would be something really “scary”: I could be stress-free, depression-free, healthier, stronger and have more energy. Spend less time working in front of my computer and more time working outdoors and being physically active. I could spend more time with my kids and husband.
    But the risk is that I can’t meet what I need to earn… :-/

  142. Ritika

    Marie,you have been my inspiration.I love the content of Marie TV,it is not like the same old stuff that we read in self help books.Its fresh and anyone can relate to you.Your episode with Chris Guillebeau changed the way I thought and gave me a lot of confidence.In the latest episode on how to make decisions,you answered a question that haunts my since 2011.I finished high school in 2011 and then it was time to make some important career decisions-leaving my city or not,choosing psychology or business studies,choosing this college or that one.I chose business studies and a college that I already knew was not very good but it was close to my house.On the day of the admission there was this strange feeling inside me,which was clearly guiding me to look for other options before taking admission here.But I neglected those feelings,telling myself that I was just feared by the fact that my friends are not pursuing this course.But my intuition was right.The next three years of my college life were not very fulfilling and the way I wanted them to be.The overall ambience was of very low quality.But I started using positive thinking and affirmations to make things better for me.But I was only trying to create my own imaginary world.What I should have done was to immediately withdraw my admission and look for other options.But I thought that I was only being negative and nothing actually was wrong with my college or my teachers.But it seems I could not hold the rosy and positive image of my college and I broke.I got so scared of making any decisions that I went blank in the last year of my college.I did not know what I was supposed to do next.Its been almost 2.5 years that I have left my college.I have been learning french as a foreign language and planning to take up a Yoga teachers training program here in India.Yes Marie,I do feel expanded when I think about opening up my own yoga studio one day.The worst thing that can happen is,the yoga school that I have chosen,will turn out to be bad and I will be wasting my father’s money.But if things turn out well,soon I will be teaching others,and practising myself too,which will be good for the physical and spiritual growth of myself as well as others.Plus,if I manage to run my studio well,I will be financially independent.I still feel scared.I still feel things will not turn out the way I feel.I still feel humiliated when my relatives say that I just cant choose one thing for myself and work on it.But believe me Marie,I know there is no one thing that I’m really passionate about.I just know my strengths and weaknesses.I am just a 23 year old trying to make things happen for myself.But your mantra ‘everything is figureoutabe’helps a lot 🙂

    • Caroline - Team Forleo

      Ritika, we’re so honored to hear that our work has been a source of inspiration to you. It sounds like you have a lot of interests, and that’s absolutely a wonderful thing! Marie went through some of the same challenges you’re facing when she was first starting out too, as she had so many interests and she wasn’t sure what to do.

      If you haven’t seen the episode yet, definitely do check out this one about being multipassionate, as it might provide a great new way to reframe having multiple interests for you: http://www.marieforleo.com/2016/07/multipassionate/

      We’re cheering you on, and thanks so much for watching!

  143. Tjsnk you! This was son on-time for me! My fav method of decision-making is the gut test, that still. It’s never let me down. And a BCS for me leaving my day job and pursuing my passions and dreams would be freedom and fulillment, like I’ve finally started to live the life I’m supposed to. I just don’t know if it’s wise to take such a jump without the proper finances in place to cover the basics.

  144. Intuition is a great tool. I use it a lot. Bookkeeping feels very contractive to me so it’s one of the first things I will outsource when I’m able to do so. I sometimes end up spelling it “bookeeping” 🙂

    • Caroline - Team Forleo

      Haha, your “bookeeping” comment made me laugh out loud! Thanks for sharing, Linda 😀

      • That’s happened before 😀 My pleasure
        To clarify: I get the bookkeping done before taxes are due, and I’m able to do them right, but I don’t like it 🙂

  145. Love it! This is awesome. I love the physical test. When I get those “pit in the gut” feelings and I don’t follow them-OUCH! When I do follow them, it is a beautiful thing. Right now, I’m working on following a huge dream. To date, it has had some ups and downs like most big projects. The cool part is I’m still following my gut with the overall picture and it is going in a really good direction. Lots of animals and the environment are benefiting from this dream and I’m loving that. It feeds my soul. When I realize the largest part of the dream it will be really special and so beautiful! Very excited to keep building step by step. Thank you for your inspiration and advice, always helpful!

  146. Hello Marie forleo this is my first time writing a comment b and watching your episode ever since I’ve became an MF insider in the beginning of january this year and because I usually don’t have data to get your emails exactly on Tuesday and I’ve never ever really thought of writing a comment and because I don’t save enough data to stream videos and I’m using a Samsung J1 mini so I can’t get the podcast that you’ve recently created or should I say launched because you can get them on I tunes. So my favourite way of making decisions is thinking things through and sometimes when I’m deciding that way I come up with conclusions than think what my family members would say than get confused and a lot of complicated things happen in my mind then decide to do what I feel comfortable with. This is how I distinguish fear from intuition:
    when I feel fear I get that from my legs which I call fire that say don’t do that you want to do as well in my heart and intuition I get every reason I’m my head of why I should do something.

    • Caroline - Team Forleo

      Qhawe, thank you so much for writing a comment, and we’re glad to hear from you! Thank you for sharing your thoughts.

      I wanted to mention that our podcast is now available on Stitcher, which you can get on an Android device. If you’d like to check that out, just search “Marie Forleo!”

  147. Giovanna Minda

    Hi Marie,
    Following my gut…..I need an extensive “how to” class on that! But I have to say, I loved your Missy Elliott dance video, which will always remind me about your tests, lol! I always look forward to your skits as they seem to help drive home the messages in a fun way.
    Keep them coming 🙂
    xoxo
    Giovanna

  148. HI Marie & folks,
    I guess mine would be a combination of passion & worry. The passion is the gut feeling, the excitement, the ‘hell Mary yes’. lets do it !!! The worry would be the others around me doubting my decisions, being negative, being logic & saying ‘what if XXXX happened?
    Well, after 18 years of my own business I have learned to listen to MYSELF & TRUST your own decisions…. they are the ones talking to you – no-one else. The minute you start talking to ‘certain people’ thats when your decisions get confused. Talk to the people you truly trust, but in my book – I’ve learned it’s me. I even have a name for my own doubter in my head – she’s called Pixie. Name yours !!!! X0X

  149. Gaby

    Hi Marie,
    First i want to apologize for my english writing. Second, this video comes at the right time. I worked in the same company for over 10 years, I have a good position and I love my Job,but!! I have the opportunity to buy a place and start a small bussines, this means giving up my job. The idea of a new bussines and to become an entrepeneur excited me, but in the other side I feel nervous, insecure and ungrateful to the company. A few days ago, they make a post of my history and all my achievements and this makes me proud of my self. But I still have the desire of having something of my own, I´m a single mother so I don´t have a lot of time to be with my daugther or just to do things I love.
    I want a change in my life, but I´m afraid of making a bad decision.

    Thank You,
    xo

    • Caroline - Team Forleo

      Gaby, we’re honored to hear this episode was helpful and arrived at the right time! We’re sending our best wishes for your decision, and cheering you on no matter what you decide.

      Since you mentioned you’re interested in starting a small business, definitely do check out http://marieforleobschool.com if you haven’t already. We have some free business trainings you can check out for a limited time, so you might find some great tips there if you decide to consider the entrepreneurial route!

  150. Torie

    thankyou for the reminders. I have always admired the way you bring out thoughts and remind us of
    The real deal.
    The real feel.
    What is really going on below the surface.
    How to face our fears and what happens if we do not ! ! ?
    Best and worst case scenarios. woo yes.
    I’m an over thinker but also the mover and shaker in my family. I think because I do go further in my thought pattern I come up with ideas and reasons others just cant see! !
    I’m definitely someone who sees and does different but also someone who makes mistakes and fails. I have learnt that just around the corner is success, so sweating over the past traumatic experiences will not help. move on find a way out and past this and stop counting the cost. (within reason of course)

  151. Thank you for this Marie.
    Been wanting to launch my youtube channel and do what I do best…teach and inspire. BCS…
    It will drive more traffic to my site
    Get more subscribers
    It will allow me to teach and inspire…my life work!
    Wait…I gotta go….see ya on youtube!

  152. DRD

    Before anything else, I want to thank you Marie for continuously helping me expand my music taste. I have never been into the rap genre (except the catchy ones) but the way you use these “rap” songs on your talks convinced me to look into the genre itself. I downloaded I Don’t F*** With You after that one video.

    Anyway, I have been working for myself for five years and have been prioritising a lot of goals: savings, fitness, gadgets and building a shop (I design handbags and I work at home – parents’ house – but all I really want is to own a shop to centralise all my business transactions), etc., that after five years, none of these have come to fruition. I was reckless on my spending and was very emotional after every failure, which comes often when you’re self-employed. And every time I was down, I splurged and spent any money I had saved.

    I have been analysing my life last December 2016 and I have realized to have only one priority, i.e., to save enough money to build a shop. I chose to let go of my other goals. I thought that the worst-case scenario is that my fitness (which is an expensive one if you really go freak about it) would be down, but I realized that I could always get my fitness back on track once I can afford it, and, that, the only way I can afford my fitness and other stuffs, is if I can have a shop where I can grow my business and my brand (I work in a lucrative industry – designing bags – but I never took it seriously until lately).

    I am happy that I considered the best case scenario when I made that decision. I thought that if I focus only on working hard and saving enough money, then the best thing that could ever happen is that I would have a lot of money to fund any other activity with regards to my business. So I worked non-stop since January 1st of 2017 until now, managed my time properly, and now my money jar (I don’t trust banks and ATMs) is slowly filling with cash. By April this year, I will start building my shop-slash-house!

    Thanks to you Marie. I get to learn a lot of lessons from you, lessons that I could have learned from anywhere, but somehow I got to hear them from your videos. The quotes you share like: “Don’t prioritise your schedule, schedule your PRIORITIES,” by Stephen Covey, and, “God is the water, and you are the faucet,” by Marianne Williamson, are like manna from heaven that help me keep going everyday. I pray for your prosperity and everyone who follows your advice!

    Thank you for being the faucet that the water runs through. Looking forward to your next lecture! xx

    • Caroline - Team Forleo

      We’re so glad this episode was helpful for you, DRD! And thrilled to hear that we’ve inspired you to expand your musical tastes too 😉

  153. Thanks for the video very helpful

  154. Summer

    Yeh! As usual, exactly what I need to hear RIGHT NOW! Thanks MF. You’re be best!

    If I quit one of my jobs, BCS is I have time to work on my business and get it done! Whoot whoot!

  155. C

    ROFLOL @ Missy Elliot bit.

    I do something somewhat similar to your physical test when I feel like I can’t decide between 2-3 options. The trick is to flip a coin and tell yourself that you choose to do whatever side lands face-up. BUT — you find out what you truly want to do when you listen to your body and feelings. If deep inside you feel a little deflated, a little disappointed, then you know that you truly want to do. My husband taught me this trick. 🙂

  156. I am going through a really tough decision about my biz. I keep saying “my gut is telling me this isn’t the right decision for my biz.” I am someone who has that contracted feeling…thanks!

    • Caroline - Team Forleo

      We’re so glad this was helpful for you, Robin! 🙂

  157. I put a big decision on a coin toss. Heads I go for it, tails I don’t. Flip it. What is my gut reaction to the coin’s decision? If I immediately want to go best out of 3, I know it’s probably not the right choice for me. If I feel scared but a little bit of “yes!!” I know it’s probably the right choice for me.

  158. Loved this video! Thank you for answering this great question (I was literally pondering it in my journal earlier today!).
    Your suggestions were very helpful and as always, you deliver valuable info in such a fun way! 🙂

  159. Kiri

    I stumbled along this video at the time I probably needed it the most. I am wanting to start my own business. I ended up writing 4 pages of notes, and really have such clarity that its the best choice for me to make and I’m really ready to do so! Thank you! 🙂

  160. Schi

    Personally Marie, I LOVE this video!! Thinking about whether that GUT WRENCHING feeling is expansive or contracting may be the SINGLE best, most useful piece of advice I have ever gotten. I used to know right away, but my confidence in my ability to read my instincts was shaken and getting that back is tough. This HELPS me tremendously. THANK YOU!

  161. Shannon

    Thank you for this wise advice, Marie. I love all the tests, but especially #1 and #4. I have been grappling with the decision to leave my current job and start my own business for over a year now, and it’s so hard to take a decisive action, and I hate living in indecision!! For test #1, I experience a painful, almost panicked contraction when I think of staying in my job, whereas I experience expansion, playfulness and joy when I work on my business idea (via B-School lessons!). There’s a clear message.

    But it was Test #4 that surprised me today. Even though I decided last year to let my current job contract expire later in 2017 and leave, I allowed myself to be talked into applying for an extended contract, and am now caught up in the drama of that process. To cope, I tried the clarity-from-engagement strategy (having heard that advice from you before) – but I used it to engage again more proactively in my current job, to try to see if I couldn’t, after all, make it work. What I realize now, to my silly surprise, is that I applied it to what I don’t want to do, instead of applying it to what I do want to do! So, my next effort will instead be to apply the clarity-from-engagement strategy to working on developing my business, and moving forward into change.

    Duh!

    Thanks for this timely advice. I am up in the night worried, and now I have a plan.

    Looking forward to B-School 2017 too! My second iteration…

    love & light,
    Shannon

    • Caroline - Team Forleo

      Thank you so much, Shannon – we’re so glad to hear this episode inspired a helpful realization for you. And of course, we can’t wait to see you in B-School again soon. You’re going to love all the new updates we have in store this year! 🙂

  162. You are the best Marie!

  163. gisela Ferrer

    Just love watching your videos and learning! Thank you! This one came at a great time.
    Super smiles!!!

  164. Alicia Schmidt

    The decision I am sitting on right now is whether or not to start a business. Best case senario I become successful, reach and help thousands, make my own schedule, work from anywhere, financial security.. there’s just so many, but I’m scared out of my mind and have NO idea where to begin.

  165. O. M. Goodness! This is brilliant. As always, thank you for making such insightful, fun videos. The decision I’m working on right now is whether or not to hire out the building of a lead capturing funnel. I have faith in the two-woman team I have already been interviewing for the job, however I’m not sure if this is something I can do on my own and save the $3,800 tab. If I hire the team, my concern is that the funnel won’t be successful and that I will have “wasted” a big chunk of precious capital. Time to run through those 4 tests…hoping I will attain clarity on this!

    • Caroline - Team Forleo

      Thank you so much for your kind words, Marissa. I hope the tips Marie shared help you decide on your next best course of action for your lead capturing funnel and we’re wishing you so much success! 🙂

  166. Vicki

    I find that what feels right can often be state dependent. If I’m in an expansive mood, something can feel good simply because in an expansive state we can see the growth opportunities and positives in many things. That same thing can feel like a terrible idea the next day. It’s confusing. Maybe it’s useful to remember that anything we care about doing, by its nature, is going to be hard and we’re not going to love all aspects of it. Is it possible that we often are expecting a “kabaam!” moment and thinking that doing what we care about is going to solve all our problems and make us happy forever? Everything comes with struggle I guess

  167. I’m a very decided person. However, this video was amazing! I love it sooo much. 🙂

  168. Emily

    Love these tests!
    Writing my Meaning Method Creative Writing Brand feels totally expansive.
    Worst case scenario: it takes longer to find the best products and make a real profit and I will be self conscious in front of my friends and family (who are actually so supportive) Then I will be really study hard, problem solve, and stay with my day job longer. Cool.
    Best Case Scenario – Making GREAT money doing what I love.
    Work it test – that’s why I’m totally ready to start B School and GET MY WEBSITE back up and running by April, with a product page this time.

    • Caroline - Team Forleo

      Woohoo, go Emily!!

  169. Heidi

    Thank you, Marie for posting this video. This is just what I needed. I love the first simple test or I call it the litmus test of feeling your body. Lately, I have been experiencing a strong sense in my gut to leave my current job because I feel like I meant to be or go somewhere else. Of course, my fear of leaving my job is keeping me from making a decision.

  170. Hi Marie,
    First off – I really agree that clarity comes from engagement, not thought. I tell my clients all the time that you can’t gain 100% clarity from just thinking about it. It takes engagement and action, and sometimes, some faulty steps, or 2 mm adjustment (as Tony Robbins says).
    Thank you for this helpful episode!
    xo
    Alexis Meads

  171. Nereides

    Hi Marie, thanks for your 4 test to make a big decision, but i want to talk with you another thing, hope you don’t mind it.

    When I think about the detail of the WCS and BCS, I consider that maybe my thinking isn’t comprehensively, because I don’t have enough experience for a lot of things. Suddenly, it’s a idea through my brain. If I give each factor a shape (ex. economic is triangle, because it has expenditure, income and total revenue), and then stack up all of it together, until those shape compose a circle, maybe the matter is comprehensive enough.

    That is my whim, how do you think? 😀

  172. OMG Marie! This was an excellent episode! I loved it! You always give actionable advice and I appreciate that!

  173. Those tips were super helpful, Marie – thank you. I really needed to hear all that TODAY. I especially appreciate how they all work together. I’ve been doing the expansion/contraction for years, and it’s very helpful. However, sometimes I need a bit more pen-to-paper action, and you just showed me what to do.

    I’m looking forward to diving back into B-School soon… been a fan since 2013 🙂

    With gratitude, Shannon

  174. Marie-Louise

    Thank you so much Marie for this insightful video, I have been in this situation for a year without being able to move forward. So glad to see that I’m not alone in this. I will put your test to the test !

  175. For me, it is ” Is this a heck yeah or a no?”. Unless I absolutely have to do it, no’s get pushed to the wayside.

  176. Emily

    Wow, this post landed in my inbox just as I really need some clarity. I am struggling to separate two job offers and choose which one I want to take.

    I can’t wait to explore your site further. Thank you xx

  177. I’m trying to decide whether or not to hit the streets and hand out my card and ask for clients. I’m a hairstylist building a brand new clientele in a new city. Best Case Scenario is after handing out a couple hundred cards I’ll get a handful of clients, statistics say about 8 clients in the door for every 300 cards. I’m trying to decide if this is worth the time. I’m trying to figure out if there is a better use of my time? I don’t know what to do.

  178. Debra

    My husband and I are making the gut-wrenching decision to sell our dream home in order to stop living paycheck to paycheck, and dipping into retirement to make it every month. You see, my once profitable sales job went away when the large company that I worked for was bought out by and even larger corporation. Since then I’ve tried two totally different careers in the past 3 years in order to bring my income up to where it once was; no such luck, both industries don’t pencil out as far as the ability make a good living. So here we are. Your video regarding decision making gives me the insight that selling our home may give me the creative head space to finally pursuit what I want to do, without the large house payment. We will give your 4 tests a try, and we WILL discover the right answer. We are tired of asking everyone we are close to for advice. We need to trust in our own ability to make this decision. Thank you so much Marie!!

  179. Great stuff Marie! This is the second time I’ve listened to this. I’m freaking out about a decision to move back to NYC. This reminded me that even if the WORST CASE SCENARIO happens and I move back to my hometown and hate it and find myself weeping at the sound of screeching fire engines and the smell of urine and I end up pantless, that nothing is permanent. It was good to “flip it” like Missy and see that being in the city would present me with many more opportunities for work, culture, art, social, etc and that would be wonderful. So what if my apartment will have to be the size of my current living room? Also, thanks for reminding me I can do a short sublet for a month or two and test the waters before going all in.

  180. Amanda

    I get support and a step closer to a healthy relationship (s). I get a break away and a mini holiday. I’ll get home and all my music gear/house/son safe!

  181. ang

    I love test #1.

    But what if you like the idea and dislike how the industry works? For example, I have 25 years in the apparel industry as a designer and design director for some major brands. I would like to create my own product but i dont want to do the song and dance of the apparel industry. Its often superficial and I want to make more real connections.

    So the body twinge is not about taking a chance on doing an apparel design business. It’s more of a negative reaction to the industry. What do I do with that?? Help.

  182. JB

    Well if I knew Missy Elliott would be involved in decision making, I would want to do it more often. I have a major decision to make. I have been a 1 company for over a decade. I enjoy what I do BUT my co workers are way too complacent. Therefore I feel like my personal drive is an annoyance and honestly becoming a barrier to success. An opportunity presented itself in a completely different field of play. I would have to learn a lot and in short order. I don’t see a barrier with learning, but I definitely cannot afford to lose a job while I have a child heading into college and another right behind her. The 4 step process provided is wildly helpful.

  183. Amy

    Marie! You are a ray of sunshine! I love your personality. Thanks for the video.

  184. I love this! Thanks Marie x

  185. Best Case Scenario Creating my new business with my Artwork and Animal Communication/Understanding. Great vision, hook and setting it up and launching it using Bschool – success. Customers buying original artwork, limited edition prints, commissioning Artwork, creating the bridge for greater understanding between Animals and People. Creating love, wealth and Abundance and having a work/life balance I have not experienced for many years. Love and Light Christine Kowal

  186. Best case scenario: I end up with a/some great employee(s) that love teaching our clients, and take the pressure off of me from teaching every booking. I get to focus on managing the business.

  187. Alex

    If I let go of someone I love to find myself and get on my own two feet. The best case scenario would be that person would be there waiting for me. The worst case scenario is that person is moved onto other things.

  188. It was a great post.Thanks to share with us.I am sharing your great post….

  189. I think that one of the main steps in the process of decision making is the ability to make the decision quickly and not postponed it.

  190. Ann

    Best case scenario would be I could actually be helping people everyday with making changes. Worst case: I never get to help anyone as I get stuck in a purposeless job. It’s difficult to sort through all the positive yes I want to do this thoughts vs all the thoughts about insecurities. Thank you for giving me a way to actually make a decision and move even one step out of this place of indecision!

    • Mandy - Team Forleo

      So glad this episode helped, Ann! You have some amazing gifts and talents to share with the world and we’d love to see you going for your dreams. 🙂

  191. Harley

    I’m honestly glad I ran into this video. Although the decision that I’m struggling to make isn’t necessarily too big of a deal in all actuality, it’s a big deal to me. I’m a high schooler, and it’s my second to last week of school. I’ve just gotten the opportunity to travel to Florida for the week with my grandma and grandpa. To anyone else, it’s simple; You better take that trip! I’d take it! And so on. But to me it’s a lot more difficult. One thing that’s holding me back is the fact that I have my finals this week, and although I’m sure I can squeeze them in before I leave, I’m still struggling. The next thing that’s really holding me back, which I think is the most important part, is the fact that I just don’t fully feel comfortable around this side of my family. Yes, it’s my grandparents I’d be going with but I’ve always had a struggle with anxiety, low self-esteem, etc., and I honestly do not want to go on a week long trip that will only result in me being uncomfortable the whole time and just waiting to be back home. But I feel as though taking this little vacation (btw I’ve never been out of my state before) could potentially open my mind up to making more decisions in the near future and help me grow and conquer some fears of mine. It’s so last minute and I’m stressing, and I’ve probably got about 1-2 days to make a final decision. So on one hand, this trip could help me grow as a person and I could really have an amazing time!!! Or I could drown in anxiety and regret the whole trip. I just want to be able to get out and try new things! I’m hoping someone can get back to me with some insight/opinions on time, I would honestly appreciate it. Thank you to those who may take the time to reply!

    • Mandy - Team Forleo

      Thanks so much for reaching out, Harley! I know you need to make a decision soon, so I wanted to send some quick MarieTV episodes about decision-making that will help you decide what’s best for you: https://www.marieforleo.com/?s=decision If you’re feeling called to go on the trip but worry that anxiety is trying to stop you, some of these MarieTV episodes on overcoming fear and self-doubt may help: https://www.marieforleo.com/category/overcome-fear-and-self-doubt/ We’ve got our fingers crossed you’ll choose what’s best for you and, if you do decide to go, that you’ll have a wonderful time! 🙂

  192. This is exactly what I needed today ! Thank you for sharing your thoughts 🙂 It’s really a big help. 🙂

    • Jillian - Team Forleo

      We’re so glad this came at the perfect time for you Maria, and we’re wishing you easeful decision making from here on out!

  193. My decision involves whether or not to make the effort to increase my business. I need to decide if I am willing to learn – and do – marketing in order to sell more items. This may sound silly to all of you natural salespeople. I have been ridiculed and told that if I’m not willing to do marketing, I shouldn’t even have a business. But I’m scared. I’m 70 years old. I need to supplement my Social Security. I make about $1K/month profit without marketing but I know I could make a lot more if I learned how to market (and I fear it will all go away if I don’t). The problem lies in the fact that I was always taught 1) Never ask anyone for anything and 2) Salespeople are sleazy and only care if you buy – not if it’s good for you. I don’t want to be thought of as a sleazy salesperson.
    When I take the 4 step test, the first one comes up a definite NO. I dread doing this and don’t want to do it at all. Number 2 tells me I could handle failure. Number 3 tells me that this could end up being absolutely fabulous. I am trying to gather up the nerve for number 4. One of the things that keeps me from starting is that there are so many “gurus” out there teaching marketing that I don’t know where to start. How do I know which one to follow? How do I trust any of them? Yes, they all have testimonials – but of course, they only show the good ones. In the back of my mind is a little nagging voice that says, “They don’t really care if you succeed. They only care that you buy their course.”
    So that is where I am. Even after the 4 step test, I’m still torn.

  194. Jennifer Smith

    I’ve never before been so torn in making a decision before. So here it is. In a nut shell. My niece (4) and nephew(5) are in foster care and from day 1 I k ew they should be with family and would have taken the responsibility no question and adapted. However my husband doesn’t feel the same and would not be a willing helpful participant. Now it’s changed and my sister is loosing parental rights and they will be put up for adoption which I can not let happen. I look at it like my husband has the mental capacity to suck it up support me and help, the two kids had no choice to be in this mess for over a year. I’ve prayed and prayed and whenever I do the thought of them coming home to me instantly lightens the pain in my chest which says do it! But in doing so will most likely destroy my family. Me and my husband. But I don’t see how if we have the means to help how anyone could turn a cold shoulder and if I fee so strongly about it I feel he should support me. I could never imagine if my family turned their back on our 4year old it breaks my heart to even think of it. I need help please!

    • Caroline - Team Forleo

      Jennifer, I’m so sorry to hear you’re facing such a difficult situation right now and your husband isn’t supportive of the decision you’re considering. It’s always really tough when family and children are involved.

      Since it’s such a tender situation involving people you love and care about, it might be helpful to have an honest discussion with your husband about his thoughts and concerns. We did a MarieTV episode on communication strategies I thought I’d share in case it helps: http://www.marieforleo.com/2013/03/communication-strategies/

      You might also seek advice from a trusted counselor or professional together to help navigate the situation and make the best choice for your family. We’re sending so much love your way and hope that you find the right solution for your family and those sweet kids!

  195. Tim

    How to get anything I want; I definitely needed to hear that. I’ve been in a heap for a while and although I originally knew what I wanted and how to do it, the off beat circumstances had me forgetting it. so hearing what I already knew in the beginning is a positive affirmation of what was required to remind me what I was aiming for. Thankyou!

  196. Lindsey

    I have a huge decision! I have been given 2 separate opportunities in my career that would both lead to the next step within my company. The only downside is I like them both, and obviously can’t take both positions. My stomach has been in a knot for days. Not sure which way to go!? My gut tells me one way, but then I second guess that and get fearful. Thank you for these test, they have been helpful! Now I just need prayers and fingers crossed that I pick the right way. I hate decisions!

    • Hailey - Team Forleo

      Thanks so much for sharing, Lindsey! Congratulations on your new opportunities at work– that is so exciting though I’m sorry you’re feeling a bit overwhelmed with the decision making process. If you haven’t already, you may want to spend some time reflecting (meditating, journaling, etc.) on the potential outcomes of each choice and notice the thoughts or emotions that come up. Of course, as Marie shares in the Tweetable above, “most decisions aren’t permanent…” so know that you can always adjust or change your mind as needed. You’ve so got this!

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