It does this.
If I did the whole MarieTV like this, would anyone get sick?
Hey there, it’s Marie Forleo and you are watching MarieTV, the place to be to create a business and life you love.
Now, today I want to talk about a tiny two-letter word that can trigger big time anxiety and fear in the hearts of many. You guys, y’all know what it is?
BO? FU? We? Us?
The answer is No, a very important word that can be both tough to say and hear. And add to that all this conflicting advice out there. Right? You’ve got this really powerful quote from Warren Buffet that says, “The difference between successful people and really successful people is that really successful people say no to almost everything.” And personally, I can kinda get behind that one.
But then you start reading Shonda Rhimes’s New York Times bestseller, The Year of Yes, and you start thinking to yourself, “Yes! Saying yes is so powerful. I need more yes in my life.” So then you start saying yes a lot more often. And, you know what? At some point overwhelm starts to kick in and then you remember the good, old classic:
“No is a complete sentence.”
Hey Jams, are you coming to my birthday party?
What a dick!
Now, for the record, no is not a complete sentence. Not unless someone is attacking you or asking you to do something that is just outrageous or plain wrong.
But being able to say no when you need to and being able to do it with class and compassion, now that, my friends, is a powerful life skill. And that’s why we’ve covered a ton of no situations in these past MarieTV episodes right here.
But because we love you guys so much and it is so important to get this right, we’ve also created a brand new downloadable cheat sheet called “The Ultimate Guide to Saying No.”
Not only does it have links to all of our past episodes on this topic, but it also hands you some word for word scripts for how to say no gracefully and compassionately in a variety of situations. And you can download it for free on our blog right below this video.
But before you snag that, I want to talk about a situation that we haven’t covered until now. That is saying no to your boss. Now, I’ve seen this question come in a few times lately, and even if you don’t have a boss, I guarantee you, this will help you with anyone that you’re collaborating with or anyone who’s in a position of authority.
So how to say no here really depends on your reasons for saying no and the nuances do matter. So I’m gonna give you two of the most common reasons that you might need to say no to your boss and suggestions for how to do it right.
Now, reason number one is this: you don’t have the time. So let’s say that your boss is trying to add to your workload and it’s just too much given the timeframe. I mean, you know that something’s either gonna fall through the cracks or the quality of your work is just gonna go down the tubes. Your no might sound something like this:
“I hear how important this is. You know what I’d love? Can we take a look at my current priorities together? Because there’s a lot in motion right now and I want everything to be done right. So I’ll either have to press pause on other projects, or we’ll need to find someone else to take this on.”
Reason number two for saying no, you don’t agree with what’s being asked. So let’s say your boss is asking you to, I don’t know, implement a marketing strategy or a pricing strategy that you don’t think is gonna work. It’s not unethical, there’s nothing in that range, but you just don’t think it’s the best choice for your customers or your company. So your “no” might sound a little something like this.
“I don’t feel right about this strategy and I don’t think we should move ahead. Are you open to another perspective? I’d love to show you an alternative that I think will be way more effective and leave our customers happier.”
Now, remember, if you’re taking a strong stand against something, you need to explain why and have fact-based reasons to really prove your case. Plus, remember this, you’d better really have a well thought out alternative to propose, because you just can’t say no without offering something else to say yes to instead.
Now, as I shared earlier, you can get all these scripts and a whole lot more in our Ultimate Guide to Saying No. Because, here’s the deal: when you know how to say no with kindness and compassion, life just gets a whole lot better. And if you ever forget, remember this Tweetable:
“‘No’ might be a complete sentence, but a few more words can make it a kind one.”
Now I would love to hear from you. So answer one or both of these questions. So first up, when it comes to saying no, what specific situations do you find the most tricky and why? Is it saying no to your friends, is it saying no at work? Or, for many creatives, myself included, maybe it’s saying no to yourself. Second question, what area of your business or life would improve dramatically if you said no more often? You can answer one or both of those questions in the comments below.
Now, as always, the best conversations happen after the episode over at the magical land of MarieForleo.com, so head on over there and leave a comment now. And once you’re there, be sure to subscribe to our email list and become an MF Insider. You’re gonna gain instant access to an awesome audio training I created called How To Get Anything You Want, and you’ll get some exclusive content, some special giveaways, and personal updates from me that I don’t share anywhere else.
Stay on your game and keep going for your dreams, because the world needs that very special gift that only you have. Thank you so much for watching and I’ll catch you next time on MarieTV.
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I’m giving 83% today.