Marie Forleo introduction

Hi!

I'm Marie

You have gifts to share with the world and my job is to help you get them out there.

read more

Honestly, I was nervous.

A few author friends told me about their experiences on book tour. While I heard about beautiful moments, I also heard words like “grueling” and “exhausting” and “intense.”

So I made myself a promise that before I went on book tour for Everything is Figureoutable, I’d challenge myself to get as healthy as possible. That included building up physical strength and stamina. (My workouts had taken a backseat while writing the book.)

My strategy? Take near-daily group fitness classes at the gym. To say that my first few classes were humbling is a laughable understatement. But before we talk about my puke-worthy performance, let’s dive into what it means to challenge yourself.

Why Is Challenge Good? It’s Not For The Reason You Think.

Many of us say we want to challenge ourselves to grow but, at the same time, we’re terrified of looking stupid. I mean, who wants to appear weak or incompetent — especially in front of others? No one. 

But here’s the thing. Being uncomfortable and doing things that are hard, unfamiliar, and outside of your skillset is the very definition of how to challenge yourself. The *only* way you’ll ever grow stronger is if you step beyond what’s easy and familiar. You must intentionally put yourself in uncomfortable, uncertain territory. In other words, you need to hop on that struggle bus ASAP!

But here’s an even bigger reason why you should challenge yourself. 

Hitting your goal is far less important than who you become in the process of working towards it. Click To Tweet

Hitting your goal is far less important than who you become in the process of working towards it. The biggest benefits of challenging yourself are the mental and emotional strengths you build along the journey, including: focus, discipline, determination, resilience, humility, and faith.

Let’s be clear. Riding the struggle bus doesn’t always lead to first place trophies or world domination. And yes, the space outside your comfort zone is awkward and humbling. You will likely fall on your face. Yes, you may even faceplant (more on how to deal with the fear of failure here). 

But if you want to experience greater growth, higher satisfaction, and lasting fulfillment in life, challenging yourself is the way to go. In today’s MarieTV, I’ll challenge you to answer a counterintuitive question that proves easier isn’t always better.

View Transcript

Check out this episode on The Marie Forleo Podcast

Listen Now

Once you’ve had a chance to watch, I’d love to hear from you. Today’s question has two parts:

  1. Think about your past. What’s one instance where you tackled something really challenging and you grew stronger as a result?
  2. What’s one hard thing you know you need to start doing now in order to make your life better?

Share as much detail as you can. Hundreds of thousands of souls come here for insight and inspiration. Your story may be just what someone else needs to have a major breakthrough.   

Important: please share your thoughts and ideas directly in the comments. Links to other posts, videos, etc. may be removed.

Thank you so much for reading, watching, and sharing your point of view. I hope you’ll join me on the struggle bus so we can challenge ourselves (and laugh at ourselves) together!

P.S. Have you saved your spot in the FREE Everything is Figureoutable coaching program I’m launching this fall? Click here to learn more and register before September 10th

With SO much love ❤️,

XO

You may also like...
Add a Comment

74 comments

  1. In my past I have overcome personal struggles in childhood which caused me to not believe in myself and my abilities due to being told I was special needs by everyone its a long story. Recently Im pushing through struggles of not having a job as I left one which no longer services me, still living at home with my parents, being finanically fruggle and positive about money while I build my business and look for a job . This adversity has taught me so much to not feel sorry for myself and keep going an use each opportunity and see my delays as blessings. This has gotten me to be more mentally stronger, think outside the box for business and apply for jobs I really want to try . One hard thing Im doing is a)pushing myself to follow through , stop people pleasing and doing what others want (I finally asked my mum if I could use our garge to do business stuff she said yes was helpful so I Dont need to travel) and looking for a finacial advisor to guide me to financial success and independency while not giving up on my business and finding job even though the economy in australia isnt the best. So alot but this learning and amount I have pushed through since I left my job has been crazy , I applaud my ability to never give up and figure shit out or get someone who can help me figure it out in something im not the best in as i know I can do some much more being financially free. love bec

    • Mandy - Team Forleo

      You’re doing GREAT, Bec! It sounds like you’re working really hard and moving in the direction of your dreams, so we’re cheering you on big time. 🙂

  2. UAAHHHH LOVE LOVE LOVE ..
    Thanks Marie. I started B-School this year to get over my fear of online marketing, beeing seen with what I am doing and of course to grow my business. AND TODAY I send out my first announcemet of my first online course… And I was so scary … even if I know, I’ve done it well with the content of the course…. But now… again and again I have to take me on the struggle bus of marketing, facebook live and and and …
    Just pushed the “send” button at Mailchimp your Q&A-Episode dropped in my Inbox and voilà …. PERFECT MATCH … Thank you. I keep on rolling! xxx Tina from Germany xxx

    • Mandy - Team Forleo

      What timing! Congrats on your first e-course, Tina! 😀

  3. One of my biggest challenges was biking over a mountain pass, and my only training was, the 5 day ride towards that very pass.

    It was a struggle, but the last hours were such a reward. We were biking over what was a hiking path with stunning views, had to cross a low river lifting the bike over rocks, pass a snow bank only to find the best view ever and a closed hut (ok that was a slight bummer). I was so proud of the achievement! It’s a great reminder of the fact I can do things I never imagined and that if you keep going forward you will reach your goal.
    —–
    The one hard thing I need to start doing now, is asking for help and reaching out to people to make my PDF sewing patterns more size inclusive.
    Numbers and maths have never been my strongest assets so, tackling size charts, researching cup sizes, creating excel sheets with limited resources feels a bit daunting. I’m researching and organizing the results, so it feels like I’m at the beginning of the journey and overwhelmed. But I think the real challenge will be to reach out and ask for help.

    • Mandy - Team Forleo

      That’s so cool, Charlotte! And we’re really proud of you for making your patterns more size inclusive. It’ll get easier with time and you’ll be a pro at it. 🙂

  4. Ah Tina… in the same boat… just a few steps behind you. All the best!!

  5. John Garland

    Question #1; What was one thing that you struggled hard for in your past that had made you stronger?
    A: Studying Bible. As a schizophrenic, my struggle was for a sound mind. Bible promised me a sound mind, so I started an intense biblical research tour which lasted a grueling 18 years. I did word studies (getting to comprehend Greek, Hebrew and Aromatic words), figures of speech (there are 212 of the known 220 figures of speech, with as many as 40 variations per figure), Orientalism, you name it I studied it. Now I can say; “I am of a sound mind, stuck in an unsound world, judged by the gods of society, to be labeled insane.” I mean, I so worked the Word into my thinking that when I get up in the morning and my feet hit the floor, all the devil spirits around me shout out; “OH CRAP, HE’S AWAKE!!!”

    Question #2: What is the most challenging thing I need to do now?
    A: Quit smoking!! It’s an ongoing thing that has so far defeated me, but I keep trying. I’m bound and determined to succeed.

    • Ellie

      Wow John! That is impressive! and re: quitting smoking… you got this!

  6. Erlinda Budoyan

    Hello, Marie, I love this ” Hitting your goal is far less important than who you become in the process of working towards it.” you are right. I’m sorry it takes a long time for me to respond to you, most of the time I’m so exhausted doing the process of government registration of the non-profit organization I founded. There are mistakes that I need to redo starting from the very beginning, there are penalties I need to pay for lack of knowledge, but along the way, I become more focus and strengthen for I saw the end of it. The vision to see the marginalized children, youth, to finish their study, poor and needy women to have skills and home business, and help our farmers. to become self-reliant and self-sufficient. The organization is now registered and have government compliance done. Last is the website hopefully next week will be published. i’ll let you know. Thank you for not giving up on me. The lesson: focus, never give up. patient with myself. if it is wrong- redo Lol! thank you marie. Love you.

  7. For me, it was tackling my approach to my business growth. In the beginning, it was extremely tempting to focus on acquiring more monthly contracts rather than strengthening the ones that I already had. My first few years of business were about me better understanding the service I offered and proving that to the clients I had, and allowing them to recommend me. It was really hard, and every time I tried doing hard sells to people I didn’t know it just didn’t hit because I was still figuring it out myself. And as a result, all my business to date has come from referrals (Like–all of it).

    The 1 thing I need to do to make my life better is take more deep breaths and continue trusting this same process that I’ve already proven to myself–works.

    • Mandy - Team Forleo

      That’s a really good point! More doesn’t always equal better. It sounds like you’re in a good spot and we’re thrilled your business is doing well!

  8. Chevonnej

    Question #1: Struggle in the past that made me stronger?
    Answer: Exercise is the 1st thing that comes to mind. To me it is like going to church or listening to Marie TV. I’m never sorry that I did and I always get something positive out of it. Exercise makes life better for me. It is also hard for me as I am a curvy girl and as we know, anytime we start over, it feels like climbing Mt. Everest; especially for a curvy girl! .. but after today, back in I go!
    Question #2: What is the most challenging thing I need to do now?
    Answer: Cut the friggin television off and read! …oh, and exercise, eat better, concentrate on my goals….OMG, I have a 100 things to do NOW! Marie, you got me thinkin’

    • Mandy - Team Forleo

      Those are excellent goals! We’re rooting for you. 🙂

  9. Karen Drosnes

    Hi Marie and Team,

    Fantastic episode! Recently I was asked if I would like to write “my overcoming story” in a chapter form for an upcoming inspirational book. I have wanted to write this story for a long time and of course, put it off and off and off. I agreed to take on this monster however, I had a one week deadline! WHAT?!?! I hunkered down over the holiday weekend and did it! The sky’s the limit now. I am getting into “the arena” now and will be a published author in the very near future. You are absolutely right Marie, the outcome of facing this demon, has provided me with the courage and strength to know I can accomplish the goals I desire to move me where I want to be in life.

    Thank you and many blessings to you for your upcoming book tour. I will see you at your Philadelphia stop… JERSEY GIRL IN THE HOUSE!

    Warmly,
    Karen Drosnes

    • Awesome Karen! Can’t wait to hear more about your book! I’m working on mine toooooo! So much love, Emily

  10. Wow! I am so grateful for this question. Because I feel that hard work has almost become a taboo. My struggle bus this year was that shortly after I left my job to take my biz full time, my husband was unexpectedly laid off, and we didn’t know when he’d find work again. Suddenly I was challenged to replace two incomes with my baby biz, rather than just one.
    And yessss there was a moment where I got sick, and there was another when I broke down, and I felt like I’d done a million burpees in a row. And of course, there was a chorus of friends telling me that I was working too hard. But I didn’t want to spiral into debt. That didn’t seem like the better option, because then I’d just have to slowly work my way in and then slowly work my way out. Didn’t wanna do that.
    And you know what, after I got sick, I got better and after I broke down, I learned these even better stress management tricks. I also didn’t miss out with time with my son, I gave him swimming lessons on Sundays (he’s 4 so he couldn’t touch the bottom of the pool) and made sure we read stories every night. Having those routines to count on made it a non-negotiable, that I would get quality time every day.
    To be honest, I don’t know that spending a long time at the threshold of something hard is better than just going through it. Learning to launch, or doing a cache of sales calls is not easy at first, but it’s a lot better than thinking about it for eternity.
    Now, looking back, I’ve built so much momentum. I have a business scaled at twice what I planned, and my husband has a great new job and his confidence is redeemed. I’m so glad we made it! The hard thing I want to do now is to finish my second book and do a launch with paid advertising. Yay!

    • Amy-Sun

      Thanks for this, Marie and team. OK, my part one: was when I had a daily ashtanga yoga practice. It kicked my butt, and I loved it, and it changed me on every level every time I did it! Part two: I need to face some now-minor, but potentially worsening, health challenges straight on; something I have been avoiding looking at. I need to face these so I can really take care of myself and be my healthiest self going forward into an older phase of life (a phase which I have been denying that I am entering! So much easier not to look it in the eye!).

    • Amy Sun

      Emily, I have two kids and a business I am holding back on. Your story is so inspiring!!

    • Mandy - Team Forleo

      YAY, Emily! We love your resilience and are so glad you made it through that rough patch like a pro. <3

  11. 1. Face my fears, my self sabotage and lack of respond-ability in the face of difficult situations, see them as stepping stones to a wholer sense of self, and becoming a much more autonomous and resourceful person.
    2. Start implementing what I know and create the projects I want without worrying if they’re good enough. Progress not perfection.

  12. Benson Modie

    Challenges and hard work are the main ingredients for growth and resilience. I do a lot of manual work, as well as jogging and exercise, and that makes me feel really good even though I get tired in the process.

  13. Hello! This answers the second part only. I’m starting a business. It’s in its stages of infancy. For it, I spent a lot of time writing a business plan and I had friends read it and evaluate it for me. I could spend months on the plan, but I realized that, by doing that, I would have done what I tend to do with great ideas: stay in them until infinity. The business plan is good enough as it is; I can leave it as it is and start to build a website, which is more accessible to clients, and even begin to offer services. This scares me because it’s making that idea real; it’s pushing me to take scary leaps; and it’s forcing me to leave behind something that is still imperfect. You see, I like to start with full clarity first. The business plan, however, is clear enough — I know this! — and I think that more clarity will come once I put myself and my services out there. Putting myself out there scares me.

  14. Good reminder.

  15. PART #1: In 2011, I conquered my obese status once and for all by shedding 52.2 lbs. in just 1 year. Eight years later, I continue to maintain this lower weight.

    PART #2: I need to permanently banish the “am-I-good-enough” negative thoughts that run through my mind. Just this past week alone, my business coach tore a strip off of me for writing some copy that was too long, my piano teacher expressed frustration with me because I’m not immediately grasping some beginner theories, and I received a scathing negative review on my Google business page from a demanding client who wanted things done “her way” (using an obsolete approach) instead listening to my expert professional opinion.

    • Mandy - Team Forleo

      That sounds really rough. We’re sending lots of love and strength your way. This, too, is figureoutable. <3

  16. Jelena Ristic

    Hi, I’m Jelena,

    The most gruelling struggle I had in my life was after I was MASSIVELY disabled by medical incompetence in Canada. To shorten a very long story, I was told over and over again that I was wrong about my injuries…I was crazy, I was unable to ‘adapt’ to the new reality that I had become a chronic pain patient with an ‘undiagnosable’ pain disorder. I had to fight family, doctors, lose my house, my husband, my job…and end up on more medication than is I think allowable if you want to retain your kidneys and liver past 10 more years just to not be screaming in pain…not function…but lie down most of the day without screaming in pain. I was told I was completely wrong. That the physiotherapy and chiropractics I’d been prescribed that put me in that condition could NEVER cause the kinds of injuries I was complaining about. That the diagnostics didn’t show ‘enough’ damage to explain my pain etc…etc…But I didn’t give up. My parents and I sold pretty much everything we could, properties back home in Serbia etc…and EVERY PENNY of the sale of my house…PLUS their retirement income…ALL …. OF….IT! To search and finally get the care I BELIEVED could help me. I finally after 3 years in this condition found a doctor in near Philly who didn’t think I was crazy. I told him my history and he took out his ultrasound wand and found every single rip and tear I said I must have had as a result of something called ‘failed compensation syndrome’ which is a fancy way of saying…the major muscles had enough damage that they didn’t function…so, they off loaded the burden to minor muscles totally incapable of taking it without eventually tearing from every day activities to those minor muscles which then started tearing ‘for no reason.’ I had about 30 torn muscles around my back, hip and S.I. regions. I was at that time on 300 msg of serequel, 900mgs of gabapentin, 300 mgs of Tramadol, .25mgs of risperidone and some lorazepam for severe anxiety attacks due to the TERROR I experienced when I need to use the bathroom or shower because I thought I’d injure myself even worse. When I found ‘my doc’ he came with a specialization in DYNAMIC ULTRASOUND which just means you MOVE the muscles while viewing them to stretch them open enough to see the rips. Visualize a scrunched up t-shirt with tiny holes in it. You only see the holes if you stretch the t-shirt flat…DUH! I had been telling docs in Canada…dozens of them THAT VERY THING. I was told no ‘significant’ tear would be ‘hidden’ regardless the ultrasound technique…I said but what if I have NUMEROUS SMALL TEARS IN MANY MUSCLES FROM REPETITIVE STRESS. I had danced flamenco on an (unbeknownst to me) labral tear for 8.5 years semi-professionally. AND THEN was manipulated and exercised on OPIATES because without viewing tears it was ASSUMED I’d pinched a nerve…etc…etc… Anyhow…my doc put down his ultrasound wand and said…VERBATIM – “You’re a smart cookie. Your entire lower back, S.I. area and hip region is Swiss cheese!” You are FULL OF tears…many many minor, some medium and some major. Two years of 4 inch shots of regenerative treatments ( platelets and stem cells) into muscles, tendons, ligaments and cartilage later…I left the wheelchair. Two years after that…I’ve started dancing again…CAREFULLY. I spent upwards of 250,000 dollars on mostly the WRONG treatments in this search…and about 50,000 on the correct ones. I made it through all of that and now live a completely normal life. But BELIEVE ME I do not sweat the small stuff because if I made it through all that…sane…then I can’t kid myself that about 99% of the things I thought were ‘tough’ before are no relegated to the ‘peanuts’ pile. I didn’t choose this…but I am SO MUCH STRONGER as a result.

    The one thing though that is residual is ( and I cringe horribly when I say this) is smoking. From insane stress I started smoking and I’m off and on…but I need to tackle quitting 100% next. As well as developing my online dance tutorial videos…I’ve registered the business, gotten a domain and am working on developing it in one way or another daily. So, yeah…I went from you’ll never walk again to deciding to teach DANCE on line. We ARE SO MUCH STRONGER than we think. Whatever you think you can’t do…don’t decide that until you have tried your heart out at it. Don’t YOU be the person who stops you! I thought I was going to die. I wanted to die for most of the 5 years total it took me to recover…but I’m not only OK. I’m EXTREMELY HAPPY! <3

    • Mandy - Team Forleo

      You’re so strong, Jelena, and I’m so glad you got the care you needed to thrive! <3

  17. Kelly

    The funniest part of this video was 2:30 in when the guy is depicting the happy guy in your exercise class. I watched in 5 times and just laughed more each time!

  18. Thanks for calling it the “struggle bus.” I’ll never again think of the struggle without the bus (it’s playful title/nickname). You always make the laugh, giggle or at least smile. Thank you, Marie!

  19. L

    I think the most impactful thing for me was, as a 13 year old, telling my mother that my father was an alcoholic and I wanted to go to a 3 week long intensive group therapy for families of alcoholics. I couldn’t continue with the chaos, fear and anger. It wasn’t normal to live with a man who came home every night drunk, angry, screaming, throwing things, etc. I was suffering from depression and didn’t even realize it because I didn’t know what depression was. I only knew my father made life a living hell and I dreaded every night when he’d return.

    My mother is an immigrant and the concept of an “alcoholic” wasn’t in her cultural background. She didn’t believe me. Alcoholics are what bums on the street were and no one in my family would go with me, so I went alone.

    Not yet driving, and the youngest in my family, I had to be driven. Every day I was told by whichever family member was tasked with the chore that I was stupid, crazy, an idiot and shameful. So for 3 weeks, all day during my summer vacation, I went and sat in a room of families and me. I was afraid and alone. Very alone. A child forging ahead without any support from her family.

    I learned so much in that program and it saved my life. For the first time I understood that I wasn’t crazy. I learned that other’s felt the way I did and experienced the same crazy things I did. I learned that my father wasn’t a monster, but he had a disease. A weight was lifted from me and it gave me a path forward. It also gave me the resolve and coping skills to go on. The people in that program were kind and a woman took me under her wing and brought me into her family, for the duration of the program. That program gave me the resources to survive and I will never forget it. For me at 13 it was beyond hard, and I am so thankful I did it.

    • Mandy - Team Forleo

      We’re so proud of you for going to the program and thankful you did. You deserve a happy, healthy, safe life. <3

  20. We, as a SPECIES, in a RPG would have the main attribute of Endurance because we are so friggin’ capable and we don’t even understand our limits.

    Every dayjob I’ve taken (mental health, youth offending support and social services) has pushed me beyond what I thought was my ‘limits’ and made a more wel-rounded, knowledgable and empathetic human being. As well as resilient and having a deeper understanding of what I really can endure and what I can handle.

    My one hard thing is to get over my damn perfectionism and have some faith in myself. To do the work even when I don’t ‘feel like it.’

  21. 1. Think about your past. What’s one instance where you tackled something really challenging and you grew stronger as a result?
    – Definitely my business. Made me stronger the longer I stuck with it.
    2. What’s one hard thing you know you need to start doing now in order to make your life better?
    – Can this be a secret? I believe that not saying it until I accomplish it is really working for me. It has to do with doing a lot of research.

  22. Emilia

    I love the video! Short & sweet, with a necessary reminder.
    I recently began a software engineering program knowing it’s a skill I need to develop to move forward. At first the excitement got me going hard. I was on top of the world! 😉 However, I quickly plummeted to “Was this really a good idea?”, “I have absolutely no effin idea what I am doing!”, and “I don’t think I am cut out for this.”. It does not feel good to not know what you are doing, or at least feel like you are making some sort of progress. But one day, while having my doubts I said “Wow, I haven’t felt like this since..”. And that’s when the light bulb lit up. I have definitely felt this frustrated and confused before AND (the best part) I stuck with it and got through it! Now, I won’t say I did not have the metaphorical knee scrapes, bruises, and several emotional bouts of uncertainty. But — I made it through. That is the feeling I am holding on to for deal life, to get through this new challenge. I have been here before, and I accomplished it. I can and will get through it… Again! Lol.

  23. Christine Alcantara

    1. I went back to school at 53 years old to get my Master of Social Work to become a therapist. I was in class with people my children’s age and hadn’t taken a quiz in 30 years. Now I am graduating in May and on the honor roll!
    2. I need to get back to working out. I haven’t done much since January when plantar fasciitis started in both feet (any ideas on how to treat let me know, I have done everything except injections). I started back two days ago and leaving for the gym momentarily.

    • Mandy - Team Forleo

      Congrats, Christine! It’s wonderful you’re getting your master’s degree and we hope working out again goes beautifully.

  24. Thank you Marie! Something hard I have to do is “show up” for my online business by adding value for my audience! They don’t know what they can’t see!

  25. “Whether or not you actually reach your goal is less important than who you become in the process!” YES! Something I have to remind myself of all the time. When I look back over the last four years since launching my business – there has been success and failure – but without a doubt there has been significant personal growth and transformation. Sometimes I think this who entrepreneurial adventure is really just a path to self-actualization. And what do I need to keep doing…NEVER EVER GIVE UP!!

  26. Sherry S.

    Question Part 1: About 20 years ago I left a job that was sucking everything out of me. It was a horrible atmosphere, the boss was cruel (oh too many stories about that), and every day I felt angry, upset, depressed, unheard, and not enough. You’d think leaving that job would have been easy for me, but it wasn’t. My self-esteem was pretty shitty, so I thought, “If I could just be better, if I could just lose weight, if I could just be prettier, if I could just… [fill in the blank with so many “if” statements!], maybe this job would be better and they’ll treat me better and I’ll be worthy of it.” Ugly thoughts, for sure. But when I hit my final straw because something happened that was well beyond what I was willing to swallow, I finally made the choice to leave and I followed through with it, this time pretty much unquestionably. And it was absolutely the right choice, and I’m so glad I made it. I learned to stand up for myself, I learned to use my voice more, and I learned a little bit more about what I’m not willing to put up with.

    Question Part 2: One hard thing I know I need to do is something that I started this very morning. For years and years and way too many years, I’ve had issues with emotional eating, body image, “I’m not enough” negative thoughts, obsession with food and dieting, you name it. Even when I didn’t really need to lose weight, I tortured myself over the years… until I gained and lost and gained so much weight that I’m now the weight I once feared I would reach. I’ve tried a bajillion diets, I’ve tried just as many workouts, I’ve met with general counselors and nutritionists, but nothing seemed to help. Today I met with a licensed professional who actually deals with eating disorders. It was scary and upsetting, there were many tears, but I feel like for the first time I’m working with someone who understands what I’m thinking and feeling and how to help me. So it’s hard and terrifying (what if this doesn’t work? what if I never resolve this inner struggle I have?) but I feel like it’s important and something I need to do or I’ll never be free. I already have my next appointment set up, and some health insurance calls to make, but I’m taking this step and trying to be hopeful.

    • Sarah - Team Forleo

      You can do this, Sherry! You’ve already shown how brave you are in leaving a toxic work environment, and in seeking help for your eating challenges. We’re rooting for you, and we’d love it if you kept us updated as you go. ❤

      In the meantime, if you didn’t catch Marie’s live class a few weeks ago, it’s incredibly inspiring and uplifting: https://everythingisfigureoutable.com/webinar/1/

      • Sherry S.

        Thank you so much, Sarah <3 I've been thinking about it a lot since my first meeting yesterday, and I can see it's going to be an enormous challenge (so much to let go of after years of embedded messages) but I just can't see any other way. I need to do this.

        And thank you for the link – I did watch it live but I definitely could use a re-watch. I'm so excited for Marie's book. I ordered it back in May and just got a notification that it's on its way. CAN'T WAIT.

  27. Anthony

    A common problem out there which I too had was with difficulty in “Voicing” what I needed to say. Being told to shut up, I’m stupid and useless was difficult in growing up with a physically abusive father. Turning that around through counselling and looking hard at myself as the instrument of change was key in resolving my outer situation. Understanding the difference between aggressive talk (which I related to abuse and shut me up because I did not want to be abusive to others) vs. assertive enabled me to reframe in my mind the years of programing (shout to Sheri!!!!). Which produced the results needed for me to speak my thoughts with positive results and with respect for others but most of all myself.

    I now am working on a course and topic that has alluded me in the past ( the stock market and investing). I am honestly kinda terrified yet invigorated. Knowing however that I have in the past confronted years of what I experienced above and am able to move forward makes me believe I can do the same in the realm of finances. And as you said in the video doing hard things makes me (you) stronger and I would add doing it with a mentor who’s been down that road accelerates the process with added confidence.

    I look forward to reading your latest book and all the best on the book tour!!!

    • Sarah - Team Forleo

      Go Anthony, go! You’re amazing for having done the hard work of processing what happened to you growing up, and learning how to not pass that on to others. You’re absolutely right — you’re unstoppable now 🙌

    • Sherry S.

      Anthony, you give me hope. So glad to read about how you were able to reframe your mind. That’s really powerful. 🙂

      Good luck with your course!

  28. Anne

    Anne here, The one thing that I did that made me stronger was having and raising six children . Struggle was my name back then. We struggle to feed the children and clothe them.I have a respect for life and thank God for the precious gift of giving life.

  29. Anne

    I road the struggle bus for many years. I never gave up finding ways to provide for my family.

  30. Stephanie L

    Wow, I really enjoyed this You&A! Usually, nothing pops in my mind when I’m asked a direct question, but when Q #1 came up, I was surprised at the number of examples that came up. One specific example is when I went to the University of Salamanca by myself the summer before my last year of university. Even though French is first my language, nothing prepared me for a Spanish-only experience in my foster home and in the classroom (because they all know it’s the best way to learn). There were no cell phones no texting, no FB, but every week I got better and better. I phoned my parents once a week. The key I now realize was establishing a routine and making sure to practice my new knowledge outside the classroom to gain confidence.
    Q #2 is now about self-care and landing on my feet. Just as I was getting ready to move back to my parents’ hometown, news of my Dad’s illness, while making the transition more obvious, hasn’t made it any easier. With old family dynamics being kicked up, it’s time to hit the yoga mat again and probably do some of those gosh-darned burpees so I can show up for my fam.
    Btw, I love reading everyone’s comments because it’s so inspiring here!!

    • Sarah - Team Forleo

      Sending lots of love to you and your precious dad, Stephanie ❤ You’re in the thick of it, and we’re so glad to hear you’re prioritizing self care — It makes all the difference in the world.

  31. Eva

    Omg, funny you mentioned that. I’ve decided to volunteer to help with a big ASS project of changing the mailboxes in our building complex with 320 units. Being a project manager and an expert in operations thought ehhh no problema!!
    Oh boy!! What a challenge! I must say, It was an amazing experience to meet and work with so many great people!! No regrets, just ♥️

    • Julia - Team Forleo

      That’s amazing, Eva! Way to share your gifts and keep challenging yourself in new ways 🙂

  32. I tackled cancer and as i say the enemy now my ally……..i found out i am stronger than i knew and i can face adversity and overcome and i am so much more than what i look like. Even started a business out of it.

    What i need to start doing today is increase strength and stamina and focus on well being. I need to rebuild my body, i have honor the space and let it naturally heal and do as it wishes as i too healed but now is the time to gather up the reins and become more balanced and rebuild. for me, health is the only thing.

    • Julia - Team Forleo

      Wow Brenda, you’re absolutely incredible. I can tell from what you’ve shared here just how strong and resilient you are. Please know we’re sending tons of healing wishes your way – keep taking good care of you!

  33. Well… many things was challenging. It’s not always wise to choose this kind of roads… but yeah… it makes differences.

  34. After a lifetime of “singing” and worship leading at church, I finally got over the mental mindset that “I can’t learn keyboard/piano” … and freakin’ learned how! In my 40’s. I specifically learned chord theory and how to play from chord charts (different than classically trained pianist with sheet music).

    In the beginning it was so exciting to actually play a simple song … with very simple technique. However, over time I started doubting that I’d ever actually lead a song while playing all the way through without ever messing up! Just never seemed like it was going to happen. But it did. When my mom actually pushed me to play in a prison chapel service, of all places. I played the whole song, and sang it, and didn’t mess up!!! WOOP WOOP!!!

    Eventually I played in a “BAND” … a whole different experience. A very small band for a teeny church. I messed up plenty, but they had grace (because for on thing THEY mess up a bunch!) … but I grew by doing that a handful of times. But then … THEN … I played for my “big” church. Which is like worship keyboard on steroids. Well, it’s all relative, but for my skill level, it was MASSIVE. The keyboard was split into different sounds, and sometimes I was in “octave 5” playing a lead line, then jumping to “octave 3” to play chords, then here, then there. And there were faders for this and faders for that, and buttons to change the background pad for each song, and a click track in my ears with monitor settings that “I” had to figure out how to freakin’ set for all the vocals and instruments in my ears. And at rehearsal, when the band started, I just had to jump on the great big giant “Struggle Bus” and GOOOOOOO … no matter how much I messed up, how stupid I felt, or couldn’t hear what the heck was going on. When that rehearsal was over, I literally collapsed on the floor in exhaustion. Everyone laughed, but they also understood the pressure on the keyboard player of all the instruments.

    Two days later, my worship pastor changed one of the songs I’d worked tirelessly to get down. RIGHT?!!!!!

    But when Sunday came … well … I pretty much rocked it.

    I’ve worked tirelessly to be as good as I can be, practice harder than anyone else, show up first, learn how to adjust that stupid monitor … AND do it all with a microphone in my way, singing as I play.

    I can do hard things!!! WOOP WOOP!

    ~JENNA

    • Julia - Team Forleo

      Of course you ROCKED it, Jenna – you’re a total rockstar! We’re in awe of you and so appreciate you sharing this inspiring story here. Go Jenna GO – you’re unstoppable!

  35. Being a single mom and figuring everything out was something that I did that I know made me stronger. Starting a business is bringing up so many fears of failure but I know I can do it as long as I put focused energy into it every day.

    The think I need to learn right now is Photoshop. I would like to use photos to help grow my gardening and holistic health website. Thank you for all the great messages!

  36. Ingrid Castillo

    Hello MF Community!
    This is my very first comment, I’m very excited! 😀
    Last year I quit a job I wasn’t enjoying anymore. I spend time with my family for over a month and traveled Europe for another 2 months. When I came back home (Vancouver) I was jobless and homeless. The home was easy to find but the job took me about 2 months. At the beginning, I was very scared, I felt insecure, and I wasn’t sure I was going to be able to change roles, because I knew for sure I didn’t want to continue doing the same job as before.
    All that time I had the chance to go back to my previous job, but I didn’t want to think about it.
    One day while whining to my best friends about my situation, one of them told me “You want to reach your goal without enjoying the journey” and that was my “AHA moment”. The next day, I went to the library, I borrowed every single book about finding your passion, career advice, self-help books. I started watching YouTube videos about job interviews. When I had an interview, I’d spent time preparing for it, I would record my responses and time myself, and I would repeat this process over and over.
    I finally got a job after 2 months in a new role. I was very proud of me. I felt that my effort was worth it.
    The next hard thing that I want to do is become a freelancer in content creation. I want to start blogging and use It as my portfolio, I want to start connecting with more people and share my ideas without feeling insecure. I want to make this happen and I will !
    On a side note, choose wisely what you do to get out of your comfort zone, it does have to make sense to you and your goal. Not necessarily to what others are doing. 😀
    All the best to all of you MF community!

    • Julia - Team Forleo

      Ingrid, thank you so much for commenting here and sharing your story! You’re SO inspiring! It takes courage to leave comfort behind for the unknown and we love how whole-heartedly you embraced your process. Congrats on finding a new role and continuing to pursue freelancing as well – we have no doubt you can absolutely make this a reality. Cheering you on!

  37. I love this Marie, it’s so easy to just keep doing what is easy. I’m going to a harder fitness class tonight!!!! And I’m building a business and it’s so hard, but I’m doing it.

  38. “What’s an instance where I tackled something really challenging and I grew stronger as a result?”
    Boy, there are so many to choose from because as a teenager my motto was – You’re afraid of this or that? … Get to work to get rid of this sh*&*!! I pushed myself to surpass fears without any mercy or gentleness for so many years. Not anymore. I still continue to challenge myself but with love and respect for my Self. I learned to look at what is under the “professional procrastinator” that I was, i.e. the fear of showing up. I presented yesterday and in the form of a lecture, my new concept called Voluntary contribution to the next. The result was extraordinary!

    “One hard thing I need to start doing right now to make my life better? ”
    This question really caught my eye. Why? Because I started doing / giving lectures to improve the lives of others after, and only after learning to take care of myself first. When I take care of myself first, I am a better position to help others do it too. My intervention is much more likely to come from a feeling of love and not from any need to be filled. Yesterday was my first attempt, after eighteen months of caring preparation and creating/tweaking my new website to make my life and the life of others better…after two years of sit back (I’m 64 years old).

    • Julia - Team Forleo

      Beautiful Monique! Thank you so much for sharing this. We love how much you’re caring for yourself through your growth process. Congrats on your new website and continuing to put yourself out there in new ways – we’re wishing you tons of success!

  39. Thanks Amy! I think every mom can identify sooooo much with the fears that hold you back from taking your business full time. It really was safer than I thought, because could have gotten another job if it hadn’t worked. In fact, I think the pressure is what crystalized my biz. I’ve noticed in my masterminds that financial pressure is actually really good for a business. So much love to you!

  40. Hi!!
    Love your post. It’s really amazing & helpful too. I like the way you explained everything. By sharing this amazing content, you have solved my problem. Keep sharing 🙂
    Thank You & Regards
    Ankita

    • Maja -Team Forleo

      We love hearing that, Ankita! Thank you for being in our world!

  41. Dearest Marie, I love you! I love your show! I love your hair! I love the Jersey Girl in you! And I love your sense of humor! But what I love most about you, is your commitment to yourself and your listeners, and I especially want to thank you for your ability to challenge me to be the best version of myself that I can be! And so, in answer to your (Part 1) question, about thinking of an instance in my past when I was touched by something really challenging, and grew so much as a result of it? My answer would have to be, I was 12 years old when I learned of my one year older brother, Steven loosing the function of his kidneys due to having contracted strep throat. And because he was wrestling at the time and “sucking weight,” he was not drinking any fluids and the strep settled in his kidneys and killed them. This experience caused me to become very spiritual, as I turned to God for help in dealing with this unforeseen circumstance. And so, as I witnessed my dear brother suffer through the travails of his physical and mental infirmities that come along with having a serious illness over the past 46 years (without once complaining), I have come to recognize him, as a true Spiritual Warrior! It was through his suffering that led me down the path of being the best version of myself as I tried to imitate him as the courageous, loving and very grateful human being that he is! His faith in God has been a great blessing for me (and so many others), in so so many ways! I can honestly say that if it weren’t for his stoic demonstration of strength and might, coupled with the many life lessons he has taught me along the way, I would not be the person I am today and for that I will be forever grateful! And I truly believe that God has chosen him to share God’s love with everyone he comes in contact with. This faithful example of living life through the eyes of Jesus the Christed One, has been used as an instrument to live a life of service to others! This challenging way of life has enabled me to be a very good father to my two blessed children. Now young adults themselves (one an Assistant District Attorney in Philadelphia, PA and one a Resident Psychiatrist in New York City), and share with them the benefits of living a life of service to those who have no voice, and others who suffer from mental illnesses and share with them the gift of healing and peace in their lives.
    And now for (Part 2). What one hard thing I know I need to start doing right now to make me better? Without a doubt this would be for me to regain the ability to begin to trust other people again, and to just let go and let God be my guide, especially when I am not sure what the next best thing for me to do is! As a result of circumstances beyond my control, I have had to deal with a host of mental infirmities and this has been a very troubling time for me! But this is an area where I feel like I am completely stuck! I hate it and I wish it weren’t a part of my life story, but it is and I believe that I must somehow find a way to re-instill this critically important facet of my best self. And as I continue to seek the answer to this dilemma all I can do is put one foot in front of the other and take life one day at a time! Sometimes one Hail Mary at a time. And I make up in my mind that the best place for me to start this is to live life in the present moment! And while I know how important it is to do this, I am finding it to be very difficult to stay present to the moment, especially because I have people coming into my house, with no other motive than to just try to play a sick joke on me and or drive me crazy! In the meantime all I can do is to continue to take my medications (16 different ones) each day and find my way out of the darkness and into the light! God Bless you Marie my dear friend and I continue to keep you in my prayers and ask God to bless you and your beautiful family and all of your intentions and your ministries. Please say a prayer for me for a special intention! Namaste`. All my love always, Anthony

  42. Bernard

    I really like your approach because it is very pragmatic about life. One of the first steps, in my opinion, to take one’s life in hand is to know how to look at it with real, rational eyes, without trying to see things that do not exist in a life that does not exist. I enclose a program that I find very interesting because it conceives reality without forcing it, almost like setting up an autopilot

  43. Ellie Calhoun

    Hi Marie and team Forleo,
    When I think back, there are so many things that I have done that were a struggle at first; from becoming a teacher, to presenting an interpretive talk for an audience of 300, to supervising a small staff of educators when I didn’t know quite how, to traveling to and camping in Alaska by myself for a summer, to raising a challenging child, to getting my massage certification and license when my youngest went to Kindergarten and I was 48 yrs young and then opening my solo practice. whew! and now – this is my current challenge and I am ready! to launch myself and fly, to open a mindful movement education center, a much bigger project than my solo massage practice.

  44. Very inspiring as usual.

    This just motivated me about exercising again! I hate it.. but ill have to do something atleast…atleast walking again …

    We cant dream our way to what we want, we have to work for it as well…
    The hard thing for me now is doing guestposts …looking for good sites… writing the pitches …and creating drafts…

    The fear of getting turned down has prevented me from writing the drafts because I feel it will be wasted work. But I know the only way I can get accepted to share the valuable info I have to share with people about how to have a great vacation on my lovely island is to write the drafts and turn them in…

    If they get rejected, ill try somewhere else or even another guest post. I know ill learn new things along the way and one day my posts will be accepted… so now its time to do the hard thing ..

    Write those drafts! My challenge for the next 6 months… walk and write those guest posts!

    Love you guys!
    #team b-school!

    xx

    • Jennifer - Team Forleo

      That’s so powerful, Keiwa, thank you so much for sharing! We’re absolutely rooting for you and can’t wait to see what you’ve created over the next 6 months.

  45. Elsie Anaya

    Hi Marie,

    Thanks so much for your inspiration.
    Think about your past. What’s one instance where you tackled something really challenging and you grew stronger as a result? Going to college at an older age and having 2 young children under the age 0f 7. I knew in order to get ahead in life that I needed to get out of my comfort zone and move past my fears in order to better myself and provide for my family. It took me 14 years to get my Bachelors degree going to school at night and I am so glad that I did it. I graduated with honors and was on the deans list many times. My children were very proud of me.

    What’s one hard thing you *know* you need to start doing now? I need to believe in myself more in what I can accomplish with my business. I need to learn not to procrastinate so much and just get things done in order to move forward and be successful and believe that everything will fall into place.

    I just got your book and will start reading it to help me move forward in my life. Thanks so much.
    Fondly,
    Elsie

  46. Maja - Team Forleo

    Thank you so much for sharing, Elsie! Going to college while having two young children gives you a superhero status in our eyes. You have so much to be proud of!
    You’re not alone when it comes to putting off important tasks needed to take things to the next level. Next time you catch yourself procrastinating, go check out this MarieTV episode, you might find it really helpful: https://www.marieforleo.com/2011/02/overcome-procrastination/
    We believe in you, Elsie and we’re wishing you so much success with your business!

  47. Emma Wilkins

    I’ve always been someone who has shied away from responsibility and always taken the easy way out, as a result I’ve always had jobs that I’ve enjoyed but haven’t loved and have a life I enjoy but not love. I know I need to really push myself to do more, so I can create the life I dream of and know I can achieve. I have two boys aged 2.5 and 4 years old and I have taken the last year or so to really “work” on myself as I can’t really work fulltime and look after them. I have been reading some great personal development books and watching youtube interviews and listening to podcasts and am now full of so much information that I know will help others and I want to get them to “work” on themselves too because it is so easy to do. I have found my passion!! I can not get enough information and find myself telling anyone who will listen tidbits that might help them in their lives. I am now working towards being a life coach and having my own business. I have always wanted to have my own business but was never really passionate about something enough to follow through. I know this will help others and will be something that can be fulfilling as well as make me the money I want. I know how you feel about money and thank you for sharing your beliefs as I have never heard it being spoken about like that before. I don’t want money as a greed thing, I know I will do good with it and I want to work hard to see what I can achieve. I am currently working on updating my resume to work towards a better paid job so I can cut back my work days ( currently 3 days a week) to 1 or 2 days so I can focus on this dream. I am posting on Instagram daily about the books I am reading and how they have helped so hopefully they can help others too. I am working towards an email landing page and starting an email newsletter to go more in depth about topics. In the future a website with the end goal to have my own shopfront that is so beautiful it will feel like a warm hug and when women and girls (who I am focused on helping) walk in they can’t help but feel they can dream big and then get to work achieving it. I know I need to educate myself and find a course that will help me really get going. That’s where I need your help. What courses do you suggest for life coaching?? I have a whole range of courses I plan to do for business etc (like b-school) but I feel I need to do something specific for life coaching as just trying to get experience it will take me 10 times longer to achieve my goals. I’m in it for the long haul and have watched your shows enough to know it won’t be over night success but I know educating myself will help accelerate it.
    Thanks for creating a space to ask this question and thanks so much for everything you do.
    I can’t wait to read your book.

  48. Marie,
    I am going through so much right now, in THIS moment, that is weighing very heavily on me. I was cleaning out my inbox and saw the title of this email and I just KNEW I had to watch it NOW. The things I am going through right now are hard and I want to be successful in them, but I know now they are changing me for the better! As Gabby Bernstein would say “the universe lead me to click on this video TODAY”

    Ordering your book on Audible right now, and Gabby’s too – the Universe is speaking to me and I think I should listen

Leave a Reply to Brenda Archer Cancel reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *