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I'm Marie

You have gifts to share with the world and my job is to help you get them out there.

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There’s one question that’s circled around our editorial meetings for quite a while now.

“How do I find a mentor to help me move ahead — especially when everyone is so darn busy these days?”

Honestly, I was surprised that this question about mentorship was asked so often. That’s probably because I have a slightly different view on the subject.

But when I took a step back, it became clear why mentorship was such a popular request. I mean…who doesn’t want someone you can turn to for advice, guidance and encouragement, right? We all do.

If you want someone to invest in you, give them a reason to believe in you. Click To Tweet

We’re social creatures. Community and connection are our oxygen. Plus, it’s just plain smart to build off of other people’s experience. After all, no need to reinvent the wheel or make costly mistakes, especially if you can avoid them. But some of us can find it challenging to find a mentor because:

  1. Successful people are often really, really busy. It’s not that they’re ungenerous — but, like all of us, they’re doing their best to manage extremely full schedules and the day-to-day demands of their life, work and family.
  2. “Will you be my mentor?” can be one of the most dreaded and awkward questions ever. Sheryl Sandberg wrote about this in her book Lean In and I’ve heard quite a few people feel the same way. Both people being asked and those doing the asking.

In today’s episode, you’ll get six ideas to help you get the support and guidance you need to move ahead. Even if you have no interest in finding a mentor, pay extra close attention to step #3. It’s a really common mistake people make when asking questions, and it’s easy to fix.

View Transcript

Check out this episode on The Marie Forleo Podcast

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Once you’ve had a chance to watch, I’d love to know:

  1. Which of the six ideas can help you the most right now, and how specifically will you put this idea into action?
  2. What’s your experience with mentorship — either wanting one, having one or being one? What are some mentorship do’s and don’ts from your experience?

Leave a comment below with your answers.

Remember, share as much detail as possible in your reply. Thousands of incredible souls come here each week for insight and inspiration and your story may help someone else have a meaningful breakthrough.

Important: share your thoughts and ideas directly in the comments. Links to other posts, videos, etc. will be deleted as they come across as spammy.

Thank you for your continued kindness, contribution and generosity here.

Reading your thoughtful responses and seeing the support here in the comments is truly a highlight of my week.

P.S. Our team is busy creating brand new MarieTV episodes for you. As always, we want to make them as relevant and useful as possible. So tell me…  What’s a specific challenge in your business or life that you’re actively trying to solve right now?


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  1. Christina

    Thank you for this video. I have several mentors because- much like religion- not one person or point of view shows you the insight you’re seeking. Marie, you’re a mentor of fine. We’ve not met…..yet. Your weekly updates & interviews are much anticipated over here, I can’t shut up about how awesome you are and I often tell my own clients that they need to become an MF insider. Your work mean a lot to me. I love your approach because there are times when it’s a huge deal for my practice and other times it’s ground breaking in my personal life.
    As per mentors, I do ask many ppl from various background their opinions so as to test what I’m putting out there, my branding. If the response is consistent then I know I’ve done a great job or its back to the drawing board.
    Be as specific as possible when asking questions shows that you are someone to be taken seriously. You are researching actively. It’s a turn on because strong business minded ppl attract other strong business minded ppl.

    • Kristin - Team Forleo

      You’re so kind, Christina! 🙂

      • Jey

        Kristin I love your encouragement and the sisterhood here. I believe women who are becoming coaches need the support of aligned mentors in the beginning stages. I believe in it so much, I created my entire life coach training program around helping aspiring coaches find the perfect mentors and creating a way for mentors to be mentors and still run their fabulous lives and businesses! Love this episode Marie! I especially love calling out the reason behind it and never asking “Will you be my mentor”. There is so much more to the relationship and the opportunity to be found by moving deeper and acting smarter.

        xoxo Jey

        • Wow Jey, such a needed service having the right mentor can mean all the difference in the world! -Maia

  2. Lisa

    OMG! I didn’t even realize that I was already doing some of those points you mentioned, Marie. The thing I think that I’m going to take away as most relevant for me is being a more active fan. I read books but I’ve not been a consistent fan when it comes to letting the people I read about, or reading their works of art, know how they’ve affected me and my worldview. That was a huge mind explosion! In the past, it felt like I would just be taking up their time. Marie you’ve given me a huge gift. Thank you so much for pointing out these mentorship points! And thank you for Q&A Tuesdays. They are so looked forward to and see you next week.

    • Mandie

      Lisa, I agree wholeheartedly. Being an active and consistent fan (point #5) was a wake-up call for me. Marie, thank you for YOUR consistency in reaching out to your audience on a weekly basis with great words of wisdom. And, that Free Mentor trailer was soooo funny! rofl

  3. Luiz Lima

    First of all you will be a amazing khalesi kkkk You’re amazing Marie 🙂 Well, I look for people like you, Tony Robbins, Bob Proctor and people like these, as the best mentors that someone can have. All of you express your ideas clearly and of course, you are helping a lot of people all over the world with your materials and ideas. I believe everyone needs inspire themselves in someone who is a expert. It help us to find ways to overcome fear. As a mentor, to be honest I don’t think that I’m a mentor, but some classmates look for me as one, because I always try to have the best grades in my classes and I already received some academic recognition and some valuable certifications in my professional area. The best thing I see is how can us help people to figure out ways to overcome things that stop them. Working hard I achieved things that peolpe who are in their MBAs could not achieve yet. So The best thing we can do is share as many times as we can, ideas to help everyone achive the sucess they want in life. Congratulations Marie and continue with this amazing job 🙂

  4. Hey Marie,

    Awesome info here! I’ve struggled with this myself in the past and am lucky to have ultimately found a great mentor at work.

    The idea of being a mentor to someone seems infused with a lot of responsibility that I can totally understand not wanting to take on. I think your point about being really specific about what you need help with is really important. It is also beholden on the mentee to ask those questions and find the time to talk to the mentor. It’s always strange to me when a mentor gets blamed for not making time for the mentee — the mentee needs to fight for that.

    Another important thing you touch on is keeping in mind is that finding a mentor is not a one and done deal. You don’t just find them and put the relationship on autopilot. A mentee has to constantly work at that relationship (and at making their questions more pointed) and I think that is the responsibility of the mentee, not the mentor. So even if someone said yes to being a mentor, that’s hardly the end of the job.

    The biggest mentorship “don’t”, I’d say, is meeting someone once, getting their email, and emailing them afterwards to ask if they’d be your mentor. I am so guilty of this and it doesn’t result in much of anything. You’re right — you have to do your homework and understand how a mentor would benefit you and what you would need specifically, not just a vague relationship.

    Thanks for the awesome tips!

    • Kristin - Team Forleo

      These are great points, Lucy. Thank you!

  5. Thank you so much, Marie! Your hint to learn from many people is a game changer 🙂 Love your show and the gift you bring to the world! Nina

  6. Ella Kreilisheim

    Hi, Marie!
    This is just to say hello to the sweetest person out there, you !
    You rock.
    And you make my day.
    I guess everybody`s day

    • Chelsea - Team Forleo

      Ella, thank you so much for your sweet note! We’re honored by your kind words. xoxo

  7. Kerry Farrell

    Great video and so timely for me. I have been struggling to find that one mentor but now I see many more options than I had before. Thanks for the insight!

    • Kristin - Team Forleo

      Our pleasure, Kerry! So glad this episode came at a great time for you 🙂

  8. Larry

    Perhaps a compliment more for your team, but the technical quality of this program is even better than the usually very high broadcast quality that you normally have. Kudos!

    • Chelsea - Team Forleo

      Thanks Larry!!

  9. Oh MY! Thank you! I love that you don’t feel the need to have a one and only mentor! I’ve always felt this pressure that I should find a mentor…and I never have…but you made it very clear, as to why! I have always looked to a lot of people for input and for insight. Granted, it would be great if I could find one person to fulfill all of my needs, but I’ve never found one person to fill that role. So, thank you, thank you, I really love this message!!!

    • That is definitely a great point you can learn from several people! Thanks for reinforcing this!

  10. Russell

    Thanks for this video. The most impressive tip for me is to seek more mentors, not limited to only one. Yes, people can’t learn all the things at once, and those must be from all kinds of experts. For different fields, I’ve tried to join some seminars or classes to learn. In recent days, online resources also give people a huge help. The feeling to keeping growing up is so great. None stop to learn from others once I’m alive in the world~

    • Chelsea - Team Forleo

      Russell, completely agree about the beauty and limitless learning available through online resources. Good for you for continuing to push yourself!

  11. Lorri Carnevale

    I couldn’t agree more with you Marie I have a love for so many different areas in my design that I watch videos (like you) and read their blogs and/or watch them through their videos. I do feel that at times I wish I could meet them (like you) but I know that everyone who I follow are extremely busy (but I am still hoping)
    Thank you for being you and helping me create a life & brand that I love now thanks to you and your free spirit and love for what you do & who you do it. (guess what you are my mentor LOL)

    • Chelsea - Team Forleo

      Thank you for that, Lorri! 🙂

  12. Emily

    Totally agree with #3.
    One idea about mentorship I’ve always loved is that age-old spiritual adage, “When the student is ready, the teacher will appear.” So a couple years back I was waiting around for the next teacher to appear.
    Then as I started to really develop my business I realized, we need to flip that quote around, “When the teacher is ready, the students will appear.” So I stopped waiting! Lately I’m at a stage with my writing coach business where I’m doing it for free, taking on clients who are working on or just finished their first draft of a narrative fiction or memoir. They are the best mentors I could have.
    Lots of love to all you great mentors out there!

    • Kristin - Team Forleo

      That’s amazing, Emily! Love that you flipped that expression around to fit your experience.

    • First off I love that quote. Doing “free coaching” is a great thing to do in your coaching business, when I first got started I did 100 calls and it made a huge difference.
      It increased my confidence as a coach and allowed me to help a lot of people as well!

      You’re definitely on the right track 🙂

      • Emily

        Thanks! That’s exactly what I needed to hear at this moment. I’ve been wondering should I get out there and sell sell sell, or build confidence in my product first.

  13. Ohh I love your dress Marie 🙂 This episode spoke to me like no other! Two things you talked about that stuck out.

    1. You don’t need to meet people to be mentored by them. I was a little late to the party and just now started watching SuperSoulSunday. OMG, life changer! I also watch videos, listen to podcasts, and buy books from those I want to learn from because you’re right, this is their BEST stuff and it’s accessible.

    2. Don’t always look up, look to the side. I used to put a lot of emphasis on learning from one person, or modeling from one coach. Amazingly, now that I thought about it, I learned more from my peers this past year. You’re right, at our level, we are all dealing with much of the same problems and synergy helped everyone.

    Thank you for the great video!

    • Chelsea - Team Forleo

      Love your synthesizing here of what you took away from this, Lisa.

      And YES, isn’t SuperSoulSunday full of amazing and diverse wisdom?! We agree, that whole show is a mentor.

      Thanks for watching!

  14. I LOVE this so much. I was just sending out email invitations for people to join my Mentorship Lab and this email showed up in my inbox. Divine timing. <3

    When I first started exploring entrepreneurship, Tony Robbins, Chris Guillebeau, and Tim Ferriss were my free mentors through their books. Then I stumbled on blog posts and ebooks that helped me take action on my dreams.

    I'd also add that you can find a mentor (and get paid) by becoming their assistant. That's how I learned about the online marketing world. I offered to intern (buy them coffee and pick up their dry cleaning just to learn how they run their business and literally look over their shoulder. Then I made myself valuable where they hired me to be their virtual assistant for $15/hour. I humbled myself by making less than I'm used to – to close the gap in knowledge of an industry I wasn't familiar with. It was really empowering to see what's possible.

    I'm also a big fan of peers as your trusted advisors as you mentioned. I have always had a mastermind partner even when I had no idea what a mastermind partner was. Now I'm a part of many mastermind groups to connect and support with people on the same path as me. It's great to not always be the smartest person in the room, but it's also nice to be vulnerable with those who are at the same level (or even a few steps behind in business).

    Thank you for sharing your wisdom!

    • Kristin - Team Forleo

      Awesome tip to add to this conversation, Jadah!

  15. Sofia

    Dear Marie,
    I just want to say, that my personal experience with mentorship is you and your Youtube Channel! I watched all Episodes and try to read every book from the guests in your Show. Because I learned so much from you, I got a scholarship for a very good University in London! Just want to say, that I´m so grateful for all of this!!
    Best wishes,
    Sofia from Germany

    • Chelsea - Team Forleo

      HUGE congrats on the scholarship, Sofia! We’re honored to hear how much wisdom you’re sponging up from MarieTV, and we love having you tuning in for mentorship through our show and book recommendations. xoxo

  16. Julie Naquin

    I had a mentor by accident. I was freelancing for an ad agency & was invited to this industry trade show kind of event by the intern. I had heard about it before but was on the fence on whether to go or not. The intern was a few years younger than I and she just kept bugging me (in a friendly kind of way) to just go – so I did. I was impressed with the whole show and was very glad I went if, for nothing else, I got out and saw a few ppl I had not seen in a while.

    A few weeks later I got an email from the event coordinator asking if I was interested in picking up some of the slack from her biz (graphic design) and if I was available to meet. I was struggling to get my gd biz going so I said sure. She had seen that I lived near her and was looking for someone near by to just do some of the production work that built up so she could tackle the bigger jobs. We hit it off immediately. She even said she almost immediately diverted from her normal “interview” process bc we clicked instantly. We soon began working together. She is originally from upstate NY and worked in NYC for a while so she knew speed in design. I am from NOLA (New Orleans, LA) and she flat out told me that she had never found another designer that could work as fast as she could with the same quality as her. (She is a really good designer. I’ve been told that I’m pretty good too.)

    It was a long mentor-ship/friendship situation for over 10 years. I did bring some phone savvy to the party — esp with the text code deciphering – HAHAHA! After Hurricane Katrina EVERYONE texted bc for so long that was the ONLY way of communication down here.

    I still think of her as a great resource for advice on MANY topics and now, sadly, a long distance friend. We still email and text occasionally but she has moved to WA state and her biz is thriving up there. It is a relationship I am so glad that happened—all from an event that I wasnt sure I wanted to attend…

  17. This so timely! I’m attending a one day seminar in which I will be paired with a mentor. It’s through our Chamber of Commerce, specifically a Women in Business group within the Chamber. She and I will then continue this partnership for as long as it seems beneficial. It’s actually a pilot program and I’m excited to be involved. I’ve never had a dedicated “mentor”, like you Marie, I look to a lot of different people and opportunities for info. I’m looking forward to joining a group of women and brainstorming. As a solo owner, I find I’m so busy caring for my clients, doing paperwork, ordering, marketing oh and then there’s my family…..I find there isn’t enough time to do everything I’d like to. I’m a B-schooler (class of 2015) who is revisiting the No Train and trying something new. And, in keeping with today’s Q&A, I continue to use, revisit & retool all that I’ve learned in B-school. It continues to be an amazing resource Marie! Thank you! You and your team kick some serious ass!

    • Kristin - Team Forleo

      Have a great time at the seminar, Lisa! And we love hearing that you’re always using and revisiting your B-School learnings. Makes us so happy to hear how much it helps you!!

  18. Elena

    Thanks for outlining these points in such a precise way.
    I totally agree that it’s very important to learn from several different mentors as no-one can have all the “answers”.
    I’d only like to add that (considering my learning style) I prefer to get as much information as I can from one mentor, trying to get a feel of his/her personality, analyse the approach, strong points, etc., and put at least some of it into practice before moving to someone else. Otherwise I tend to get “suffocated” by all the information if I just listen without putting it into practice, especially if the info keeps coming in high amounts from several different people at a time.
    Maybe it’s just me 🙂
    Thank you for the inspiration to continue learning!

    • Chelsea - Team Forleo

      Elena, I don’t think it’s just you! Taking action is a hugely important piece of receiving mentorship from anyone. Try it on, see how it goes, and keep trying new things if it’s not the right approach for you. I think this is such a healthy mindset to have!

  19. I completely agree! I think where I ran into some trouble is it take a little while to find people on the web who resonate with you. I am really turned off by a lot of the business “get rich quick” talk out there and it made me want to stop looking for a while. It took me finding you and few other online business owners that really resonate with me to make this mixed bag of mentorship work. I have also found some great entrepreneur groups on Facebook (that took a while too) and then some additional time getting to know people in there, but those have been a wonderful form of peer support. I feel better asking what may be newbie questions to peers rather than someone who has moved way beyond that, as you mention. Thank so much for being one of my mentors (even if I never sent the “will you mentor me” email)!

  20. well, Marie you really hit the nail on the head for me today! i had this particular topic on my mind yesterday about my incredible difficulty with reaching out for help. i have had so much trouble with just asking others for help because I always have believed “to get things done, you have to do them on your own”. anyway, i decided to reach out to someone who i had been following (reading about and watching privately) to ask about how she got started and if she had any suggestions/advice. I told her I wanted to hear her story. well, i got a pretty vague answer. i took no offense to her short response but, i just felt completely deflated. i thought- wrong approach? i took a chance because I do need support, i do want a mentor, i just don’t know the way to go about that. thanks for this video…very helpful tips on what to do and what not to do.

    • Chelsea - Team Forleo

      So glad to hear this helped, Nicole!


    Bonjour Marie,
    I have to be honest with you: this is the first time I leave a comment on your website even though I have been watching Q&A Tuesdays for over 2 years now…
    Thank you SO MUCH for this video and for all your work, your energy and all the fun you share with us. It helps me a lot in my daily life and makes me a better human being little by little. You and your team are definitely some of my mentors :)!
    Un grand MERCI et bonne journée à tous!

    • Kristin - Team Forleo

      We’re so happy you jumped in the conversation today, Stephanie!! xo

  22. Tarfah Al-Suleimany

    I absolutely love your Marie TV episodes. Each topic resonates deeply and I completely agree with your take on mentors- the more the merrier, and its amazing what you learn from colleagues who are in the same trenches we’re in. Wisdom and experience are great and I always surround myself with mentors who have “been there and done that” but its people on my level who I learn the most from. Marie, you’re great, I always learn something new (sometimes many “something new”s) from you! Keep the good stuff coming!

  23. Perfect timing. I’ve been mentored and mentored and mentored over the years by many amazing people, including you and many mentors we’ve shared. While on my way back from Burning Man this year, I traveled a bit with a woman who is selling her business and she seemed like she would be a perfect mentor for me, but I didn’t ask her on the spot because, well, I know how busy she is and she’s not in the business of mentoring, or business coaching, so I couldn’t just buy her book or consume her program. I sat with it and considered how I might be able to help her as well — then, reached out to a mutual friend to ask her if she would be open to an introduction as I would love to be mentored by her and would also love to support her with sorting through all of the estate planning and asset protection options after the sale of her business, which is my specialty. So, we’ll see how it goes. I figured that offering a reciprocal benefit could make it worth her while, as it often does for me when someone wants my mentoring support.

    On the flip side, I do get asked to mentor a lot. And, sometimes I do say yes, when the person asking has something of value to offer me that I want. Otherwise, I direct the person asking to my programs and coaching resources for that support. It’s a lot easier now that my work has been productized and evergreen and I’m not just delivering it 1:1. Thanks Marie! xoxox

  24. Maureen

    I really enjoyed your training how to get everything you want and have shared it with various people. I am currently working very hard to develop my business and it is very exciting and also quite scary. It is challenging whatever we may say to really explore what we want and really commit to and fully believe in ourselves. I am taking various online courses about purpose and business development as well as confidence. I know these are all integrally connected. I know that I am going in the right direction and I fully agree that I get something different from everyone I learn from. I think the most important thing is to be open to what everyone has to say and to learn from their perspective. We are all different so some experiences resonate more, some people are more compelling or closer to what I believe. But I have to always stop myself from dismissing ideas for being too this or that and also saying I know that already. I always tell my students this but of course it is easier said than done hehehehe. So yes I am seeking out great ideas and support from all directions and appreciate your insights. I am commited and need to keep my energy going in a positive focused direction which I think is the key for everything including mentorship. Being open to what is coming in rather than dismissing because it is too out there or something I have heard many times before. Or just being truly ready to learn and grow. For me this I would say is the biggest challenge: developing confidence while remaining humble and open. Thanks for being with me on this journey 🙂

  25. It’s all good Marie and staff. I love the Jersey girl attitude–so different than the left coast. And a good message for all. As someone old enough to be your grandmother, I find it FUN to learn from you-th who are SO successful and YES… there’s wisdom. Main thing for me is know specifically what is mine to do–keeping that focus on mining your own treasures and leaving the legacy that only YOU can leave. It’s never too late; and yet time is very limited. Being specific stood out for me in this set of six.

  26. Laurie Moore Skillings

    Thank you, Marie for being a great mentor!

  27. I’m a constant, true fan of Marie TV.
    Thanks for everything you do 😉

    • Chelsea - Team Forleo

      Thank you so much for you thoughtful note, Mary — we deeply appreciate it.

  28. Hi Marie,

    The right video at the right time!

    My favourite point is not to put all my expecations and hopes on one person… I just keep learning from many of them as I always did, without the nagging feeling to not been mentored by someone live.

    • Kristin - Team Forleo

      Love that this came at the right time for you, Janine!

  29. Sharon

    Thank you Marie- such practical and sound advice. Just perfect.

  30. Giuliana

    Marie, you speak to my soul. I LITERALLY just met with a colleague yesterday (a friend only a bit senior to me who I respect in the office) and asked him about mentorship. How do I find the right fit? Who should I ask? And as I was sitting there, I was thinking, “Wow, I always enjoy our conversations. We’re around the same age, but I feel like I always go to him for advice. This is kind of like mentoring.” EXACTLY your #3 tip on today’s episode.

    That being said, this video really helped me a lot because I think I have this idealized picture of what a “mentor” is… (cue Dumbledore whose wizadry skillz are used for copywriting + content strategy). And maybe it really is as simple as continuing to inhale juicy, relevant info I find online and keep reading advice from the people I really admire and respect – people who often feel out of my reach. Technically, they’re like right there, right? Def a mindset shift.

    One question though – in the case of “sponsorship,” coming from the POV of a more traditional context or work environment, what would you recommend? I work really hard, pouring passion into my projects and have been recognized and given cool opportunities at work. BUT, I’ve also been advised to identify someone to advocate for me behind closed doors… Any tips from either you or anyone in this community who may have experience in this realm? Would greatly appreciate!

    Thanks so much!

  31. Amazing sinchronicity, I was just dealing with this issue today!!

    I got to contact a Coach and a Business owner that I admire a lot, and replyed me today answering that her time was gold ( this is how we say it in Spain)… and gave me her assistant´s telephone number for contact her directly…. bussy and with not time.

    I loved your video and in part, I think in the same way. I think i will follow yuopr advice.

    thanks Marie!

    • Chelsea - Team Forleo

      Sonia, we love it when the timing works perfectly like that! Glad we could help. 🙂

  32. Marie, I had to open this email the moment I saw it, thank you for addressing this topic!

    Two years ago at the big conference for my field where all the thought leaders and newbies and everyone in between gather, I got up and asked the group “What kind of mentoring relationship can we create that is worthwhile to everyone involved?” Mentoring can be a HUGE commitment of energy and time, and yet I really wanted to have someone with more experience look at my work and be able to share specific feedback.

    One of the women I look up to approached me and said she was putting together a mentoring package, would I be interested in finding out more? I said yes, and in short, ended up paying to have a mentor for about 7 months this year. I’m sure there’s lots of opinions on paying for mentorship, but for me this worked because I felt like I was getting great value and feedback, and I wasn’t afraid I was “taking up her time” with “silly questions” because I was paying her.

    I love the idea of looking sideways! Any experiences out there on how those relationships are established?

    With lots of gratitude, Karina

  33. Tonya

    Thanks for the episode. For me, the most impactful idea is that a mentor/mentee relationship does not have to be formal. There are a number of amazing people that I look to for inspiration and ideas via books, talks, interviews, etc. (Including yourself – thank you!) However, it did not feel appropriate to consider them mentors. I like the more casual perspective and this encourages me to be more interactive with these incredible souls.

    • Kristin - Team Forleo

      Yes, totally agree, Tonya. Lots of incredible people out there to learn from!

  34. Karen Coughlin

    Your comment about successful people that others want as a mentor being super busy is so true. I am chair of an executive women’s group that has mentoring as the platform. We have even established a handbook to answer as many questions as possible about the mentoring relationship. Our biggest struggle is we have not had interest in applying so we can help with the match. Help!

  35. Kim Martinez

    Hi Marie,
    Love your videos! I was struck by one obvious mentorship opportunity that was not included- our elders. Retired people often have the time, patience and keen wisdom to assess strengths and weaknesses. My oldest daughter was unofficially mentored by three older women in our NYC community garden. I can see how they impacted her career choices and were instrumental in her seeking and gaining employment in the field that she studied. Sharing their connections, extraordinarily diverse life experiences and creating high expectations for her motivated her to follow through with opportunities that she might never have had. I can’t say enough good things about this. I wish some of my other children had discovered this type of mentorship!

    • Kristin - Team Forleo

      That’s a fantastic point, Kim! And it sounds like your daughters received some really incredible mentorship from the women in your community garden. Love that 🙂

  36. Awesome episode, Marie!
    I find that most people aren’t sure if they are looking for MENTORING or COACHING, and this is a key reason why they ask the wrong question / expect a different answer. A mentor is someone who did something similar and now can give advice on pretty much how to replicate their results; a coach is someone who hasn’t done it AND adds lots of value by asking the thought-provoking, mind-blowing, light-bulb-moment questions which generally don’t get asked. This implies that one needs to get clear on who they want to work with and who would add most value for them – a coach or a mentor.

    Also, I totally agree that one shouldn’t get hung up on the idea of working with a mentor (or coach) at all times, there is so much information out there and so much value shared, one can learn anything online by finding the thought leaders in their desired area and reading / listening to their content and becoming active in their communities.

  37. This is one of my favorite Q+A Tuesdays in a while! And I love the comment about looking to your peers – I had an “a-ha” moment the other week when someone e-intro’d me to a business contact of hers as one of her “peer mentors.” I was flattered, then realized that we had definitely been mentoring each other without realizing it. I used to get all tripped up over the word “mentor,” and now I realize it doesn’t have to be this weighty term you bestow on one person and one person only. Mentor-mentee relationships are just that: relationships. It’s all about building rapport with someone else. I also think it’s important not to view mentorship as a hierarchy. Not only do you NOT want to create a mindset in which you’re underestimating or devaluing yourself, but like you said, you always want to be looking for ways YOU can help or support the other person to return the kindness 🙂

    • Chelsea - Team Forleo

      Yes, 100% agree, Katie, and love what you added about them being relationships, just like any other.

  38. One of your best episodes! I love the advice to not rely on one person, and to study the advice that’s already out there. We are all responsible for our own growth, instead of looking for a “mommy” to take care of us.

    • Chelsea - Team Forleo

      Katrina, we’re thrilled you love this one so much!

  39. Marie, I find this in my inbox today as I am asked to create a core group of people to move forward in Lewis Howes’s school of greatness.
    Thank you so much. Your timing is always impeccable. It’s hard to reach out and ask for help for fear of rejection, but if you don’t persist, it will not happen.
    Keep smiling beautiful Marie, its infectious.

  40. Thanks for guiding prospective mentees to be specific when asking for help in their business. I have made the mistake of asking for someone to mentor me when I was exploring the idea of an herbal apothecary business – and I think I scared the pants off of them! I expressed to one business owner my own desires to help others through natural solutions and lavished her with praise about her apothecary business prior to asking her if she would be “the one.”

    With hindsight being 20/20, I realize she may have been more receptive had I been specific and asked questions tied to measurable outcomes for my business i.e. What have been your most successful advertising investments? or Are there any vendors you would recommend for packaging and labeling supplies taking into account that affordability and quality are equally weighted for my business?

    Great tips! My Tuesday rocks!

  41. Amanda

    I’ve discovered I don’t need to look far for mentors. I’ve learned a ton from my aunt this year! My advice is to think about what you can offer as well as what you can gain. My aunt gives me valuable writing advice, and I help her with tech stuff. It works tremendously well.

  42. Hi, Marie, great episode, thanks!!!
    Right now I am using the idea #1, the free mentoring. On the Facebook I am daily watching Robert Hollis’ Live videos, every day at 1PM EST. Robert is sharing public
    his wisdom and mentoring really for free!
    It will eventually take me to become his student, because he is teaching a lot
    about Mindset, he is calling this “Tune Up From Neck Up” 🙂
    And, of course, on You Tube there are plenty of great videos with Tony Robbins, Oprah W., Bob Proctor, Jim Rohn, etc. etc.
    From you, Marie, and the wonderful people you bring on the Marie TV, I have learned a lot too. Just keep going!
    Love & Peace!

  43. Luis Rodriguez

    Thank you for your insight Marie. I’ve often wondered if I’m missing out on not have a (one) mentor. I read and listen to a lot of different successful people and I truly believe this has been more helpful for me.

    • Chelsea - Team Forleo

      Absolutely, Luis!

  44. Constance Holdip

    Thank you so much! I am in total agreement. I learn from everything and everybody. I love peer mentors. The people God placed into your life are strategic! I have a small party of awesome women; educators,counselors, writers, I am an author ad well, they have efited my work. I am very creative and I have friends that are good money managers and pratical they teach me just by being their friends. I study successful people habits. I also use television, face book, movies to inspire and learn. Don’t know anything about square footage but I can see a space and decorate kind of like a decorator shaman lol. Learned from watching designers big hgtv fan. My design got published in Ashley Rooney’s book Asian Influenced Architecture & Design. I am sharpen my interview skills by watching you love your energy and your glamerous studio stylish way of dressing you are fun and informative. I can relate ! Need to enjoy what you do! I have an eceltic array of gifts to share with the world; writter, home stylist, floral designer, counselor and now life coach. It’s tough out there but when I connect with you, you speak possibilities, passion, inspiration and make it doable is that a word lol, by your example! I am encouraged and grateful for your work and success! So I will continue to create!

  45. Caleb

    Marie, it was really an eye-opener watching this video. I was always told to seek that one mentor that would take you under his/her wings but the truth is that I’ve had many mentors along my journey without even realizing and I’ve learnt so much.
    Thank you for this vlog!

    • Chelsea - Team Forleo

      So happy to hear that, Caleb!

  46. Thank you for this episode, I think it’s important for people to see the different angles of mentorship.
    I have been roped into mentoring in many ways. In the last year I have found myself having conversations about boundaries.
    1. Always thank and give credit to the sources you are learning from, no one likes a credit grabber and people can smell your flakey fakey! Authenticity and humility will pay dividends in the long run.
    2. Ask pointed questions.
    3. Don’t expect your mentor to tell you what fork in the road to take. Look at it as not telling someone what to think, but getting them to think about options.
    4. Ask the right person for the question. Wires are not my friends so don’t ask me a computer question.
    5. Close the loop when you choose the way or find a better way. I often think about people who come to me for advice and wonder what path they took and how it went for them. It’s not to be right or to get praise, I’m genuinely interested in their success.
    6. Have fun!

    I have found that setting the boundaries has improved my mentee relationships and has made me more receptive to mentoring.
    Thank you for Marie TV, I just love my Tuesday email inbox!!!

    • TonyBigmile

      Great summary. Awesome indeed.

  47. OMG This episode resonated so much to me, especially because I think of you as one of my greatest mentors, even though you don’t know me! I’ve been participating in mentoring programs since my youth, first at college, then when I was part of large corporations, since I was a young-lady executive, something quite rare at the time (25-30 years ago). Now that I give up my age I think I’m authorized to add another consideration to your list dear Marie: age is not relevant at all in a mentorship relation. I learn so much from you, even though you can be my daughter or baby sister, because of your honesty, generosity and wisdom.
    Thanks a lot for being my mentor, such an inspiration for me and others. Keep the great work dear Marie and team Forleo!

    • Chelsea - Team Forleo

      Jeanette, you’re so kind! What a beautiful thing to say. We love having you tuning in, and completely agree that age has very little to do with it. xoxo

  48. My Walker

    Awesome Response. I follow a lot of my inspirational heros online (Steve Harvey, Tony Robbins, Myleik Teel, and YOU) via youtube subscriptions, books and podcasts. I also think its a great idea to sometimes just observe people that have the skills you want and emulate their strategies. This way there is no pressure, nor time constraints, on either person.

  49. #3 – Don’t always look up, look to the side. Best advice ever. This is exactly how the 50+ members of the writing group I belong to operate. And we are one of the most published writing groups I’ve ever heard of. Why? I’m sure it’s because of the peer-to-peer mentorship. In addition to sharing our experience and tips, we do two other things that I believe are critical to our success:

    1. We have accountability partners within the full group; pairs or triads who connect once a week by phone or email to set goals. Quick contact, but fabulous to keep your writing goal for the week top-of-mind!

    2. Our monthly “AttaGirl!” check-in where we all get a chance to tell the group what we’ve accomplished in the previous month and receive a cheer of “AttaGirl!” AND a chocolate! Even so-called “fails” are celebrated, since every action is courageous. For example, “I was rejected by 5 agents in the last month,” is a huge accomplishment since it shows that you’re putting yourself and your work out there. And, it helps the writers who are a few steps behind to see that risk-taking isn’t as scary as it sometimes feels.

    Peer-to-peer mentoring. Works like a hot-damn!

    • Chelsea - Team Forleo

      YES, Donna! We have a few different members of our Team in writing groups that operate exactly the same, and it’s powerful stuff!

  50. Marie!
    I love this! My favorite quote of yours was to be ‘specific.’ I think that being specific requires taking the time to really think on your own before inviting someone else to the table. This work shows respect for the mentor and makes the most of the two seconds you might have with the ‘expert.’ The poly-mentor idea is perfect. For me, I love having a mentor for each side of me-‘chintwins’ for yoga, ‘marie forleo’ for business, ‘brene brown’ for relationships, and then a slew of professionals for my particular field–gardening. Love your content and your quick wisdom videos!

  51. As a Coach I get a lot of questions how things could be done. I mentor only if i can see some serious intent like “respect – contribute – earn”. If he/she has no respect for others and won´t contribute but wants to reap, there is no way i would help him/her to earn.
    Otherwise i love to be all in and see them grow 🙂

  52. I absolutely love this video. Everything you said is so spot on. I am hustling and working hard on my dream every single day. In order for me to do that aside from working hard…I obviously would like advice and support from individuals who have done it and been successful in business. I love the part about there being mentorship everywhere around us and it is so true. It is about making a commitment to sit down read, watch videos, etc. and making it a priority. I always say that discipline, consistency, and persistence are your golden ticket. I never thought about looking to the “side” and that is incredible advice and you are absolutely right about their struggles/issues being more relevant to what I am going through. I am so glad this came into my inbox this week! It was exactly what I needed to read and see. Thanks for all you do, Marie!

  53. Hi Marie,

    This is a really great reminder of the need to keep mentoring ourselves through our connections. I’m like you, I think I garner info from lots of different sources through reading their books and following their blogs. I have certainly learned a lot from you over the last few years! My take away to day though is to not only look for experts, but to look to colleagues as well. I have a friend/colleague that I didn’t even realize till this MarieTV is a great mentor to me. I have learned follow through and drive from her. I think I owe her a thank you! As I get ready to launch a new product, I am going to keep this in mind and start making sure I thank even those I don’t know, but follow their work. So thank you, Marie for being a GREAT mentor! Hugs to you and your incredible team!

    • Chelsea - Team Forleo

      Sending big hugs back! 🙂 xoxo

  54. Amanda

    Dear Marie & Team,
    Thank you so much for this video. I have experienced a number of “when the student is ready, the teacher will appear” moments when looking for mentors. When I changed my focus from literary criticism to scenic design and moved to Milan to take design classes, I found a mentor on the second day of my stay. The second day! Since I have been back in my home country, I have reconnected with a family friend who has became my second supporter & he even enjoys mentoring me, because he is retired but still loves the exchange with other creative minds.
    I am now looking for input specifically on scenic design (as opposed to related disciplines like architecture & interior design) and am reading books about the subject and biographies of current & past masters of the field (your 1st point: check). There are a million things I have to figure out and actions I need to take and I am determined to have a great time doing just that.
    Thank you! 🙂

  55. Ginny T

    Loved this video! Great and timeless advice.

    My experience with mentors has been a winding path. I’ve wanted someone to partner with as I come up in the world, so to speak, but over like 7 years with no success led me to this thought: Huh, I wonder if the 1:1 mentorship model is even realistic for everyone in today’s world. It might be better suited to the previous generation who lived in 1 place their whole lives, stayed in 1 career, and at one job, etc.

    After having that ah-ha, I started doing something similar to what Marie suggested. I created a Board of Directors in my life (can’t remember where I heard that phrase, I feel like it was in something published) and for financial questions, I listen to or read Mr. X and for online marketing I listen to or read from Ms. X. And I would say overall, the Podcast app is my biggest mentor! HA! Buckets of goodness there.

    It’s worked well for me because their blogs/podcasts/whatever always have time to “talk with me” when I need it. 🙂

  56. Awesome advice! Been looking more to my “side” lately and find lots of knowledge and motivating colleagues that are all willing to connect and share. We all have something to contribute. Being specific in our questions is helping me too! Love to listen to your show, Marie TV! Thank you :))

    • Chelsea - Team Forleo

      Thank YOU for tuning in, Linda. 🙂

  57. Kristina

    This is not the first time that I have been talking about something and then hours later a Marie email pops up in my inbox with the answer. Just this week I was talking about finding a Mentor and debating whether I should or not.
    Thanks Marie for your thoughts on this topic and it’s process.

  58. Jacqueline Conte

    MF – this was a very helpful and timely video for me. Thank you 🙂

    I have found that the mentors I’ve had in the past happened to become my mentors without me even trying or realizing I was receiving one. They would generally be colleagues who were in the same playing field as me, but with more experience – people I looked up to, but could also relate to. When a connection was made to invest in each other’s growth and success is when I realized that mentorship was happening and it was always a reciprocal relationship. My tip would be to look for mentors where they already exist. Helped me out a lot!

  59. Hannah

    Hello Marie,

    Thank you for this video, i love watching every episode i receive from you. This episode reminded me of mentoring others and being a mentee at the same time. I’m a person who looks for learning in every single chance i get from other people around me. So since i love to inspire others, i’v alrdy mentored a few of my friends without them being aware that our relationship was alrdy a mentoring type. And it’s so awesome that on this day, they have already gained a massive change in their life just by following the ways i tell them. Well, actually, they are the once who made up for their actions, what i did for them is only to keep motivating them, inspire them to believe in themselves and always do their best every single day. The power of words i bestowed on them helped them unleash that potential that they already have but are often neglected. Now, they are happier for their choices and are more eager to get better results in life. About me as a mentee, i like making friends and connecting to older people and learn from them. I don’t really ask them to mentor me, but i ask them specific questions on how did they get to reach their goal, how did they overcome a struggle and many more specific questions. So from that, i learn from them. I often start the conversation and let others do the talking, i just listen. For me, since i love to learn all the possible things i could learn, i search for it. From people, from books or the internet.

    Overall, it’s really wonderful to share learnings and learn as well!

    And everytime i see u in my inbox? I always feel delighted so thank you so much and keep it up! You really rock!

  60. Jessica

    The idea that I need to work my buns off and prove to any suitable mentors that I have what it takes and to impress them is the one I needed to hear the most right now. I have a tendency to over consume intellectual insights and content from the Internet and not spend enough time doing my own work!
    Also, the idea of being a constant presence for those I admire most, such as attending classes and commenting on their posts ect.
    So here I am:) I admire you Marie and am grateful for all that you share!
    Jessica Fusch?

    • Chelsea - Team Forleo

      Thank you so much, Jessica — that means a lot to us.


    Awesome info!!!

    Thank you Marie. I’ve been home recovering from a surgery over a month and my mind is overwhelmed with so much ideas and dreams that I want to accomplish, but I am questioning where should I start. I am passionate about the beauty industry and there is so much into it that I am finding difficult to find someone to help me to take the first step. I am currently working in the industry, but I am very ambitious and I want much more for my life.
    All of your ideas helped me without doubt. Now I need to stop overthinking and trust my guts.

    Thank you for sharing your knowledge Marie,

    God bless you!

  62. And here I thought I was crazy for NOT jumping on the “gotta have a mentor” train! It seems to me that the reason people want a mentor is to 1) avoid failure/pain, or 2) learn faster. But aren’t you cheating yourself out of valuable experience by doing so? My grandmother said experience is the BEST teacher, and she was right! It’s been my experience that when I live a situation, and am forced to find solutions within myself, I own my life on a level that avoiding the failure/pain/lesson never could’ve given me.

    Confidence cannot be manufactured, or contrived because it stems from trusting myself to handle all the wonky stuff life throws my way. If someone constantly steers me around pitfalls, I never have to handle it. I never have to stretch myself. I never have to fall into the pit. If I never do any of that, I’ll never know the pride and self-esteem that come from handling it on my own, and never develop the trust in myself necessary to exude real confidence naturally. That’s my two cents!

    Thanks, Marie Forleo, for being the lone voice in the darkness letting us all know that it’s perfectly okay to march to the beat of our own drums! Muah!

    • Chelsea - Team Forleo

      Thank you for your kind note, Cindy!

  63. I’ve found such an amazing group of sisters who support me in so many ways. Some mentor me from afar, as Marie Forleo and Gabby Bernstein do, and some from up close and personal as we create and explore together! Couldn’t ask for more balance and guidance.

  64. As social beings, I believe what you are saying is so true about mentorship. I love that I don’t have to hire a millionaire mentor at some insane monthly fee to have breakthroughs. I will be focusing on those beside me whom I can follow and audios like podcasts, to mentor me in my online business. Thank you for being a mentor to me, as I always look forward to Tuesday’s email on Marie TV!! Lastly, I loved what you said about how to follow those you are influenced by and how to get their attention. I know I should do this, but sometimes I think what I have to say isn’t so powerful and yet I realize we are just human beings and everyone needs encouragement, and to be empowered by a following no matter their level of success.

    • Heather Lederman

      Forgot to mention that one of the worst experiences I had from a higher up mentor in my company was being challenged out loud verbally in front of 50 other leaders in the company. I trusted her heart, but I couldn’t stop crying because though some of what she said was true, it was so humiliating AND she heard the information from my direct mentor, we had never discussed it personally. A double wammy of humiliation. I am grateful for the experience as it has taught me what NOT to do when I am in a mentoring situation. I have since moved on to find the mentors that empower me and build me up with truth in my business, not tear me down in front of others.

      • Chelsea - Team Forleo

        Good for you, Heather, and I’m so sorry that happened to you. Clearly, you’re taking a beautiful lesson away from it though.

  65. Love this video so much. All my best mentor/mentee relationships have come totally organically. Becuase whenever I’ve tried to force something, well, it’s felt forced.

    But for the people who seem “too far out of my reach”, the best way I’ve found to connect with them is to PAY THEM. If they have a service I need or want to do, I pay for their time. If they have a course, I sign up. I recently did an awesome writing workshop with my favorite copywriter of all time and even though I more or less already had the skills, I wanted to better get to know the woman who ran the course. Since then I’ve been able to get her feedback on my work and ask the occasional question via email, without me feeling guilty or her feeling resentful.

    Basically, if you love someone enough to want them to mentor you, hiring or paying them is a great way to showcase just how much you respect their work.

  66. Marie!
    I really enjoyed this video and it was EXACTLY what I needed to hear. I think that if I’m truly eager to learn from someone, I can do so by showing up fully to a learning experience, discussion, class, etc. Building a one-on-one relationship with one person is not always feasible, and the term mentorship encompasses more than that. I also learned the hard way when I as young, that you need to be careful about who you ask to be a mentor. Even if someone is older and more successful than you doesn’t always mean they will be a good fit for a mentor. Thanks so much!

  67. Patty Sierra

    Hi Marie,

    I discovered your website about a month ago, and I love it! I love your weekly Q&A’s too. I would love to one day do what you do, your style and how you deliver such great information is amazing! Thank you for inspiring me to be more!

    • Chelsea - Team Forleo

      Patty, we’re so happy you discovered us and are now tuning in 🙂

  68. Jen Martinsen

    Loved your tips, Marie! Such a relief!! As I am starting a new business I obviously want to set myself up for success and knew I needed a mentor. But after today’s episode I realize I already have several and just hadn’t characterized them that way in my mind! I am fortunate to have many trusted colleagues and individuals I will consult with to understand their approach, learnings from their field of expertise, etc. I was viewing them as trusted friends, but they are also trusted mentors! Thank you for helping me change my perspective!

  69. Tarcela

    I’ve had great success with mentors in the past. I really love your idea about having more than one because I have so many interests and topics that I love. How I can learn from my peers and colleagues is another great idea! Just like giving my kids advice on many different topics as they grow, is my own mentoring! I love teaching and sharing with others on what I’ve learned and what worked for me. I get a lot of people telling me that all the time, “you should be a teacher, or mentor or psychologist!” It’s all about listening and finding others to actually hear you without judgment and/or criticism unless they ask. I’ve found that people often solve their own issues just by talking about it out loud (Especially women!).
    Anyway, thanks for the advice it was very thought provoking! I will definitely use it!

  70. tamara Loeffler

    This video is so on point with my point of view about mentorship. I work for a large corporation who has a “mentorship program” and to be honest with you, it feels so forced that I’ve never gotten anything out if it. The best relationships are organic so if that means it’s face to face, books, blogs, pod-casts, as long as it feels natural then you’re probably on the right path. I’m pretty much doing what you’v suggested in this episode Marie, so thanks for validating my belief! I appreciate your work Lady!!

    • yes – yes – yes! “Organic Mentorship” lol 🙂

  71. April

    Love this video!

    For me, my best mentors have been people that work in the same industry as I do and whom I consider friends. These are people that I trust with my mistakes, who do really great work. Sometimes I agree, sometimes I disagree with them, but our interactions are always positive, helpful, and never condescending. One of my most trusted mentors doesn’t even consider herself as my mentor, but I am always asking her for advice, and always learning from the out-of-the-box ways she thinks and solves problems. Unfortunately, in my chosen industry, there are a lot of people who would rather tear you down than build you up. Thankfully, though, I am part of and help admin a Facebook group filled with people who want to help others, build them up, and who do not want to tear others down.

    So, in essence, DO attempt friendship over a mentorship relationship(not that a mentorship relationship is bad, obviously), DO develop a relationship based on mutual trust and understand, DO show that you are dedicated, and DON’T tear others down. In my experience, most of my most trusted mentors have been the ones who are okay with someone doing something differently. You can disagree with someone without tearing them down.

  72. Cynthia Mccarty

    #3 Was very important to me . I have consider getting a mentor and was wondering how. And you answer that question. Trying to find my gift or purpose in life.

  73. Yes, this is so awesome – thanks for all these gems, Marie! I especially love how you’re encouraging us to work on our own body of work while asking specific questions along the way. Great great examples. xoxo

  74. For me it is a matter of semantics. I define much of what was spoken of in this Marie TV as ‘coaching’. Whereas, for me, mentoring is done by someone who loves you. They don’t have to be an expert. They don’t have to be hugely successful. And their job is to ask questions – not give answers. Their job is to be the eyes on your life that know how to ask the questions that draw you out. This is the traditional role of adults in indigenous cultures. It is the reason so many of those cultures are infused with people who know who they are and where they fit in the world. People who are happy in the face of hardship (rather than whiny in the comfort of their air-conditioned home on their fluffy couch). People in these cultures flourish not because someone told them something, but because someone knew the right questions to ask.

    I understand that mentoring has another reference in our culture – that of a business mentor and that is really at the heart of this conversation on Marie TV. In the case of seeking a business mentor the ideal person is more successful than you and in the field you want to succeed in. However, again for me, this person – to be a mentor – will not be giving direction or answers. They will draw you out through questions.

    I have had both in my professional career. And, like Marie, I like having multiple “coaches”. People who inspire me from afar (not paid by me) and those who give me direct feedback (paid for by me). Both types are valuable! And I have a mentor. In this case this person is in my career field but our relationship is more about life. A gentle course-corrector who helps me fill my sails from within.

    Now I’m off to the B-School/Copy Cure FB page for more glorious coaching from one of my faves, Marie Forleo!!

    • Chelsea - Team Forleo

      Love your insights here, Kate, and what you said about a good mentor drawing it out of you.

      And we’re THRILLED to have you on board in the Pop Up Community!!!

  75. I’m forever grateful to you as one of my many mentors who I have never meet. And for all those striving to make a positive difference in the world. I value being part of a tribe of influential change makers immersed in transforming the world; focused on a whole systems approach, healing ourselves and nurturing the earth. Many of my greatest mentors have passed on in body yet their spirits sore inside me.

    As a business and wellness coach, I mentor and encourage my clients to have an open and curious mind, one that increases their appetite for change. Life can be delicious, bitter, sweet, pungent and sour—all essential to satisfy our palates. It is a fermented process cultivated by influences that motivate our actions. Looking at all the people and ingredients in our life that inspire and motivate us, we make the most successful personal recipe. Reflect upon our life stories and we also find mentors from the past that we might have ignored.

    What we choose to do with our life becomes our personal manifesto. Who we allow into our life makes a difference. Choose your mentors wisely.

    Progress is a giving mindset, rather than a taking one.
    Mentor and be mentored is my motto.
    Big Love Donna

    • Chelsea - Team Forleo

      Thank you so much for your kind words, Donna. xoxo

  76. Desirée

    So nice to hear! This was one of those times for me when I had the thought, “Oh, so I’m not doing this all wrong.” This is how I’ve been “doing” mentorship, because it feels naturally easier for me. But, I’ve had the thought in the back of my mind that maybe I’m not doing something right because I don’t have a formal, official “mentor” relationship. Thanks so much!

    • Chelsea - Team Forleo

      Desirée, you’re SO not doing this all wrong 😉

  77. Jennie

    Marie, OMG you’ve done it again! Positively BRILLIANT guidance. Your video has just totally reframed my world.

    Here, I’ve been all like “Ooooh, I need someone to DISCOVER me, I must have someone ENDORSE me before I can know that anything I do makes any sense,” when really, A) I’ve already discovered so much about the wisdom of the people I admire from the massive amounts of reading-of-their-stuff I’ve done, and B) my success – or that of anyone else’s – and what I want to accomplish in life does NOT need to hinge on the rubber stamp approval of any one person who is “higher up” than me.

    Thank you for reframing the meaning of mentorship, where and how to source it, and in turn for unleashing my awareness of the strength in everything I’ve already done. Because when it comes down to it, it’s the value you deliver that counts. My Dad has a saying: “If you’re going to make rabbit stew, first you need a rabbit.” Not, “First you need someone important to tell you what a great rabbit you have…”, it’s “first you need a rabbit.” Well, a rabbit I’ve got. And your video has released me from the mythos that we somehow need someone else higher up to validate our existence and efforts before we can succeed. Instead, we can dig into our work, pay attention to the results we get, adjust course as necessary, and keep grooving on whatever our mission may be. Not only does this new understanding help me refocus on the strength inherent in my own work; it takes the pressure off anyone I might approach for guidance, which will make for a much more productive and mutually respectful relationship.

    Thank you for being such a brilliant, bright light of the positive power of the internet, and for changing my life for the better.


    • Chelsea - Team Forleo

      Jennie — wow, thank you for your kind note! We’re delighted to hear how much this helped and shifted your perspective.

  78. Chanie

    Loved this episode Marie.
    I loved 3 and 5 the best.
    I am a huge believer in the social status and being really young I have to work hard not to let that stop me from showing up everyday.
    That being said I love the concept of turning to the side to my colleagues and friends who have so much value to share.
    And loved what you said about not being attached to the outcome.
    Too often we want to become noticed by a mentor for a reason or something.
    But just the fact of giving back to them is the “prize” in itself.
    Thank you so much!!

  79. I have had one mentor which i completed one of his courses. He was great and i still keep in contact with him. I listen to other pros in the fitness field which helps me acheive a positive attitude. I love the health and fitness field which is why i listen to them.
    Marie, you talk gave me positive smile for the start of the day. I have started to realise i have mentors which help me acheive goals…

  80. Hi lovely Marie Forleo Team,

    You guys are doing better and better everyday! Many thanks for all this amazing content!

    I found one of my mentors through it’s a cool website that has professional willing to help small business for free! And as Marie said I read tons of books and follow life-coaching, business-coaching, all kinds of coaching on their works and social media. Sometimes the lesson is one right word.

    Xoxo and Love
    Maria Bailey

  81. Hola!
    I’m Yenisey from Mexico.
    Last February I entered to the B-School Scholarship contest and I didn’t win but I really believe in what I wanted to do and I continue with the line of projects. I mean the fact that I believe somebody could help me with my project made me be that person and obviously you were a great mentor. I was watching your videos, feeling connected with your posts and here I am more confident and starting to have profits from my project.
    Thank you!!! ?

    • Chelsea - Team Forleo

      Yenisey, it’s great to hear from you, and we’re so happy you’re continuing to tune in and take action on your business. Thank you for being here with us!

  82. Marie – you are so funny but ALWAYS so plugged in! Even though today’s awesome video was about mentoring the example you brought about being specific, not vague was EXACTLY what I am dealing with at the moment. Hence……
    …what IS the best WordPress plugin for membership site if your budget is under a $1,000?
    I would be SO honored to get a reply to this one!
    Thanks to you and your amazing team!

    • Chelsea - Team Forleo

      Marni, shoot us an email and we’ll be happy to further help! 🙂

  83. Marie, thank you for this subject. I agree 100%! What I do is not exactly what someone else does so it only makes sense to get the best pieces from a variety of people. You, my dear lady, have been a huge source for me. I have sent so much of your content to many of my students and clients. They will start binging on you just as I did when I first found Marie TV. The down side to having one mentor is they will naturally try to mold you into another version of them. You want to keep your uniqueness, your individualism, the piece that makes people want to listen to you. Thanks again Marie. Have fun!

  84. Thank you and thank you again! That’s amazing video. Actually, today I read some articles on this topic and I really think about writing to person I admire. 🙂

    Have a beautiful day

  85. Tina Cardinale

    This comment is not specifically about this video, it’s a shout out to you, Marie, in general. I never post comments because…I don’t know, it’s just one way I try to limit going down the wormhole of time usage. It’s easy to get caught up reading other comments and responses and wanting to post more or checking back to see if people have responded and then an hour has gone by. So, I just watch.

    But, I do want to say you you Marie, I am a long time fan and, also, a B-schooler!! And the thing that hits me the most about you is your fantastic balance of your masculine and feminine energy. It is a huge focus for me in my work and life. I, like you, am a huge Tony Robbins person and, also, a dancer. I have been dancing since I was 2 (L.A. scene, we probably know a lot of the same people) and I know we can get feeling pretty tough because of how strong we feel in our bodies. I’ve seen your hip hop stuff. But, dance, also allows that flow between masculine and feminine energy and you have a completely balanced persona! And you are a shining example of moving with direction and purpose but from a distinctly feminine energy. I LOVE it!! It inspires me to stay balanced in my masculine/feminine energies. Salsa dancing is my fave for staying in my feminine! So, that is my one comment. Thank you so much for all of your inspiration!!!

    • Chelsea - Team Forleo

      Tina, thank you for your beautiful comment — we deeply appreciate your kind words.

  86. Hey Marie,
    I’ve gotten a lot of good advise from my local SCORE office through SBA. Many classes that have minimal cost or are free. She should try that and will end up meeting many people like her with different ideas who are just starting out.

  87. Hi Marie,
    You are truly phenomenal and have added so much value to my life. Thank you!!

    Your point about virtual mentorship really resonated with me since there is so much available to us these days via the internet these days. I followed one mentor online for several years. I then made it a goal to meet her and finally did. It was awesome attending one of Ann Sieg’s workshops and putting the physical with the spiritual.

    I hope you don’t mind, but I’ve adopted you as one of my primary mentors. God willing, it would be a dream come true to meet you in person one day! Please keep your community updated on speaking engagements, hosted events, or in-person workshops that you’re a part of.

    Thanks so much again helping me to create a business and life that I love!!

    Stay blessed,

    • Chelsea - Team Forleo

      Thanks, Henry, we absolutely promise to share new happenings with our community of Insiders first!

  88. natalee

    I have young woman coming to my place of business and asking if I can be their mentor. sadly, I just don’t have the time. What I do offer are workshops and a question and answer session where people are welcome to ask me whatever they want. I am also constantly posting advise and tips on my faceBook page.It does help,

  89. Thank you for this session, sometimes, I have dreaded that question from many who have asked me to mentor them. In the past I have said yes, but they expect me to tell them what to do, how to do it, and worst yet thy expect me to look for them. Yikes, I have been beating myself up because I thought it was me, that I did not know how to be a good mentor. Well, thank you for this segment! I AM FREE!!!! I am so enlightened now!! Namaste, Marti Angel

  90. Terri Boykins

    Than you so much for this info. I am a new start-up and everyone I have encountered on my journey is much busier than I am. I have learned that I don’t have to work at their pace. I am busy discovering who I am as an entreprenuer and what is the best business strategy for me as a business woman. I research a lot of info and I have a few business people I learn from. For me it was refreshing to hear you name the many ways of mentorship. It validates for me that I am on a good path. Thank You

  91. I do have a mentor that help me to begin setting my Brand, Marisa Murgatroid with a mentorship program, she us to do live call coaching that help me a lot, until she realize that programs that sell just information was not enough, now she is promoting a Experience Product Program, that I´m not following at th moment. I try Ryan Levesque Next level Mastermind group in Facebook buy they where too ahead for me but I learn more about Quiz and between them two I was able to clarify my real passion and select my niche, but I still have a long way to go making my dreams come true! I will have to change from Inner Light Jewelry to Inner Work Gym.

  92. Love these reminders, especially that your mentor may be along side you and not necessarily “above” you. I work with a lot of awesome senior-level people who kinda secretly long for more connection and community–but are afraid to become mentors. It led me to write about the myths of becoming a mentor (could be of use to anyone in this community who’s holding back being the mentor they could be, because as Marie says, we need you!)

  93. Tatiana Kochetova

    I like all advices from the video, but the most helpful for me: earn respect and trust through action. Sometimes I feel frustrated with a lot of advices around me. I read successful ppl’s blogs, and I think how it can work for me. Sometimes I hate an idea of mentoring, but I believe that when you’ve became a wisdom you can’t save it for yourself, you will share it with who ready to get it from you. Thank you Mary, good job!

  94. L Wood

    I really enjoyed this video. You brought home to me what I need to get started off with in my business.

    Thanks Marie.

  95. TonyBigmile

    Thank you.

    • Chelsea - Team Forleo


  96. Hi Marie
    Such a great show. thank you. I had been thinking about this so recently and yes totally love the comment, about their best thoughts coming out in interviews etc, which we can watch again and again. I am a b-schooler but even before I totally considered you one of my mentors, and love the access we get to your guests, some of whom have been great teachers for me as i explored their work further. You have totally inspired my work, as I love doing interviews too, and gleaming information for my audience from people who inspire me is so much fun. I listen to podcasts all the time, as as a writer, yet to be published, (I’m on it) I would totally recommend to any other creatives, The beautiful Writers podcast, it’s brilliant. I watch Supersoul Sunday, this is golden, I’m a bit behind so great reminder to watch some later and books, well I just eat them up. Part of my business model as well as interviews, involves bringing inspirational speakers to my venue and Im always thinking, what can I learn what can they learn from this experience? I also really value chewing things over with my peers via a business mastermind group, so yes thats a total win win for us all. . It feels so good to be reminded that I’m tapping into mentors all the time. much love and appreciation Bernie x

    • Chelsea - Team Forleo

      Absolutely, Bernie. SuperSoulSunday is one of the best (and most regular) mentors for diverse and thought-changing wisdom — we love it too.

  97. Terri Gregory

    You are SO good for the world and for me and my business projects. Thank you!

  98. Arlando

    I would say look to the side and not up was the most interesting thing one and the one I’ve never heard of. I will use this more during my projects. The tip of having multiple mentors is something I use because not only one person has the right answers. The two other ones that I really liked was being a devoted fan (which I will start using when it comes to social media) and creating good work are very important.

    At this point, I have had mentors(mainly ones that never met) and wanting mentors.
    from what I’ve learned, don’t come off needy and wanting something from them, it feels really unnatural to me when I do that.

  99. Listening to interviews, books, speechess. This is a huge one for me. i struggle finding people I admire but it is a huge blessing when I do!! I feel kind of embarassed because I am so needy!!! either im too needy or Im too independent (both f me over). If there is any advice on that I would love to hear it!!
    Im basically alive today thanks to people I dont know! And the people I do know have been my biggest lesson.

  100. Dale Gibbons

    Whenever I see articles on women and mentoring, they make my teeth hurt. First, I have found it rare that women mentor other women. My experience has been that the desire to be hard asses like the men have made women hyper-competitive and the last thing they are going to do is to help someone else who wants to work in the same space. I remember in college I called up and asked a professor to have coffee with me and talk to me about working as a broadcast writer. She shot back that she was too busy, had too many things on her plate – personal and professional – and the last thing she had time to do was to sit down with a student and have coffee. Ha. Okay. Thing is, that is pretty much the response I’ve gotten from every single women, except one, who I asked for advice. I find that most women business owners are so scared out of their minds that someone is going to take a dollar out of the pocket that mentoring if they aren’t getting paid for it is the absolute last thing on their to-do list. The entire discussion about “leaning in” is really about “leaning over” and the danger of being pushed out of the way….by another woman. Mentoring as a concept is a great article topic, but as a reality is just a myth.

  101. Shelbie

    What I have realized is that when finding a mentor I don’t really need to try hard to find one. Instead I tend have mentors come to me. I’ve also learned that their needs to be some sort of boundary between you and your mentor. Just because you don’t want to overwhelm them. I just think having a mentor or many mentors really does make a difference. It makes me want to stay healthy. After all mentors believe in you.

  102. Avelyn

    Hi Marie and Team!
    I swear these video videos always come out at the perfect times. I am currently in banking and have been struggling with career pathing at my company. I’ve been in retail banking for 8 years, most of the time as an executive assistant, however I am now a law student with plans on becoming an attorney. I’ve spent the whole summer picking the brains of any attorney I can find who works at the bank and finally landed a meeting with the Cheif Legal Officer of my company. The meeting is tomorrow morning!

    This video literally was the cherry on top of my preparation. The most valuable take away is getting precise with my questions beyond an ask for mentorship. I’ve revised my questions to be a bit more granular as my end goal is to be a CLO of a company or run my own firm!

    Thank you so much for this amazingly convenient gem of knowledge!

    Always an avid fan,

  103. Terri

    You are my mentor Marie !
    You are the one I get the inspirations and encouragments on a weekly basis.
    Also, I can be my own mentor by going into the nature, where I am nurtured either by a strong mountain, or by a open sea, where I can reconnect with one that is always inside me.
    So, # 2 resonates with me the most.

    • Chelsea - Team Forleo

      Beautiful, Terri!

  104. Elena

    Thanks Marie for those wise remainders!

    Indeed books, schooling, online contents and peers are all great sources of mentorship!
    Before watching this video I had the feeling I had to look for this one precious mentor but now I know that i’m surrounded by great mentors to guide me. Just be consistent by following them and apply advices.

    Thanks again for your energic presentation and clear structure that make your point easy to follow! 😉

    • Mandy - Team Forleo

      And one of the great things about having multiple mentors is that you can get advice from a variety of sources so you can find the wisdom that resonates most with you. 🙂

  105. OMG, so good, Marie! I feel like generally there is so much pressure on getting A mentor which is like… does it even happen? Your point of view makes so much sense and makes me feel a lot better about not having A single mentor 🙂

    • Mandy - Team Forleo

      Variety is the spice of life, right? 🙂

  106. Hey Marie, I’ve been doing points #1 & 2 already. I have favourites that I follow religiously (you included). I’m on their email list, watch their videos & share, purchase their books & on-line courses, etc. I didn’t realize that was a form of mentor-ship, but as you said “It’s their best thoughts, ideas & lessons” and I can go back to them again and again.
    Thank you for pointing this out and for your great work, you keep me going. Love your videos!

  107. Shay

    Great video, insightful and actionable. Here are some thoughts on my experiences of having a mentor. On the topic of a mutually beneficial relationship, there will seldom be a mentoring relationship that is not of that nature. There are very people in the world of mentoring that would just want to ‘mentor’ – something has to be in it for them. And this is not a skeptic/complaining tone, in fact it’s an appreciation of a healthy give and take relationship. Something which I realised, because just wanting someone to take you under their wing shows you can’t stand up on your two feet. Secondly, I think capability is really important. While being super passionate about something will catch someone’s attention because you want them to be their mentor, showcasing your talent and abilities is really important – i.e. Having a level in your body of work/experience/qualifications that matches the passion. You gotta show potentisl, this isn’t about who shouts the loudest on the dinner table. A difficult pill to swallow, but we must always check ourselves first before latching onto the idea of mentorship. Plus, mentors are human beings, prone to bias and sometimes they just see something in someone they can relate to. Some wild success stories come from that. So it is important to be capable alone, and from there, a mentor can guide you to heights unimaginable. And while being a dedicated fan of that person shows you are willing to learn, I’ve always had a boundary to never idolise someone to the point of losing myself! My viewpoint is just as valid, and the person is there so I can learn from them to better myself, not to be them. Thanks again. Xo

  108. Evi

    Dear and lovely Marie! I love and enjoy your videos so much and every Tuesday the themes you pick up to discuss is like you are reading my mind!! I had several mentors so far even though i felt i was stepping into a foreign field-why do i need one to programme my life and why do i feel so weak to just design my own goals and future?” I am a painter and my field is hard to support yourself financially and emotionally too. I do often go out of my routine where i should be painting and i do often underestimate my artwork wondering if i should consider myself an artist(?). Anyways, the mentors helped me at a point but the key is not to expect much from them and feel like your life and career depend on their opinion and personal beliefs. I try now to read books(i am reading and following Tonny Robbins), watch inspirational videos and write down my goals, limitations and desires. I believed that having a mentor is a sign of weakness but i guess now is in fashion? Successful people have mentors, especially politicians.

  109. What’s worked for me somewhat is finding others who also “want mentoring” and forming a small group where we each define our primary skills and help each other with ideas and brainstorming; the last group I formed of about 6 people worked together for about 12 weeks until it fizzled out; some paired-off and are still working together; But to ‘hire’ a Professional Mentor is an investment you have to have funds for and be committed; plus you have to find the right one; the last group i looked into had an interveiew process to be sure I was the right “fit” for the type of small biz; there were several mentors who were highly advanced and successful people; there was also a tiered structure where you could pay up to $600 or more to attend 4 meetings per month; the PROBLEM is as a statup with little capital, being able to afford this level of business Mentoring; – jP

    • Mandy - Team Forleo

      That’s a really smart idea, JP! It’s wonderful to hear how your group mentored each other and provided support, which is so necessary in the startup world.

  110. I spent a long time trying to connect with people of my field and it was hard, they are usually very closed. However, some of them answered specific questions as you mentioned so it is a good point. I think clarity is essential. Another important thing is believing in yourself, self-doubt takes you nowhere. I think I’m improving in this area and that led me to become part of a mastermind group naturally. It is perfect! We all are growing our business and sharing self improvement things we learn. Thanks for your great videos.

  111. Great episode! I, like Marie, prefer to have many mentors and learn from many experts and thought leaders.
    I love how you said to look to THE SIDE. I recently started a weekly mastermind with two other piers/entrepreneur women so that we can all help each other grow and hold each other accountable. ….And we are all from completely different walks of life and businesses. And this makes us all have more to offer one another.
    I’ve only met two (John Maxwell and Bob Burg) of my top 6 mentors (them along with Tony Robbins, Deepak Chopra, Oprah, and Marie). I met them because after reading their books and attending their workshops, I ultimately completed certifications through both John and Bob.
    Thanks again?

  112. BeeBell

    I started out by following Seth Godin. His daily advise hits my inbox and I love his insights into marketing not just for marketing but life as well. He turned me on to you and Danielle LaPorte as well as others like GapingVoid Art (love his little cartoons and sayings). Then there is YouTube (I use it for lots of Techie know how) and believe it or not Pinterest. I don’t know how many times I went down the rabbit hole and suddenly discovered someone or something. I have always been more of a ‘self-help’ person as I tend to have little patience when I need to know something. However, that being said, I have always been viewed as the ‘go-to’ person when people needed help (probably because I have already researched everything already, lol). Unfortunately that also puts me in a bad position as I am viewed as the person needing the least amount of help.

  113. Matthew McGuire

    Hey Marie its me Matthew McGuire i have always wanted a few mentors to be a better worker and student in my life but i don’t know how to start finding them the video helped me see a new way but how do i find a few please help me God bless you

    • Matthew,

      When Marie mentioned be specific, this is a great way to learn from that point. Being a better worker and student is still pretty vague. There are two topics there already, which makes it harder to answer without asking you a series of questions.

      What do you think a more effective question could be?

      Post it here so you can get some answers. Heck, even post a few like a brainstorm and see if you get some feedback on getting more clear.

      Hope that helps.

      P.S. These videos are a type of mentorship and so is this reply.

  114. I love this episode, Marie! To use Marie’s expression, there is so many “freaking awesome” mentors out there that to be with only one is, not only limiting yourself but with the possibility of turning off your own light. It happened to me. It was a mistake that almost cost me my emotional health. Trust your guts and although you can change the light of the lighthouse, be the one that holds it in good condition! Thanks Marie!

  115. rob

    Thank you for your insight, and as always, your smile

  116. Wow. So timely. I have a neighbor who is a highly esteemed media executive and former member of the White House staff. (She was even the subject of a hint on Jeopardy last week!) I’ve admired her for years, and was amazed to find out that she moved in the next street over about 2 years ago. I run into her from time to time, and have been biting my tongue over asking her about meeting up for advice. My gut has told me – not to approach her from a place of gimme gimme…because she has so many people who want her time that way. I’m hoping to do some work and find a way to ask her a question about leadership and branding. Maybe next time I run into her when we’re walking out dogs? Thank you for this! It’s a great reminder on how to handle potential mentorship or just getting great advice from someone awesome in the right way.

    • Mandy - Team Forleo

      So glad this was helpful, Debi! I can tell you’re really considerate and thinking about what she might want instead of just what you can get from her, so I think your genuine intentions will really shine through. 🙂

  117. As a mentor I love working with women who actually do the work and not hire mentors just to have one. When my clients do the work and see results it lights me up and reminds me of the difference I am making.

  118. Hi, Marie, and thank you for this lesson!

    I consider you as my mentor, I have followed you pretty much from day one, because I related to your approach very much. I now have a business coach and I consider her a mentor too. Learning from the big thought leaders, yes, but for me a mentor needs to be a little closer to my specific situation. I read and watch and consume a lot, but some things may not really apply to me, so business coaches, life coaches, relationship coaches… coaches in general can be good mentors and offer an insight on how to apply what we consume from the literature into our own life.

    Merci beaucoup ! <3

    • Mandy - Team Forleo

      That’s really smart, Llyane! It sounds like you’re on the right track. It’s so wonderful you’ve been following Marie for awhile—our whole team loves seeing your comments on episodes! We’re so glad you’re a vibrant part of the MarieTV community. 🙂

  119. Hi Marie,
    Your video on finding a mentor actually affirmed for me that I’m on the right track. I think that we often have mentors without realizing it. I am a food producer and interact with other producers at markets and sales events all the time. I ask them specifics about suppliers, costing, best events, etc and they turn to me likewise for advice on how I started, how to approach a store to sell their products. Probably the most intimidating mentor is the one who is so far ahead of where I am at right now, and your advice to mentor the “from afar” so to speak was excellent in sight. I have many mentors, and as you say, some are authors who help me keep my focus, deal with personal issues that risk side railing my success. I have a friend who made an enormous success of her restaurant right from the first week they were open and they have been busy now for 3.5 years. She’s a marketing genius and I don’t need to ask her directly what to do, I just watch her strategy and take from it what I can that applies to my business. I even learn from people who are just starting out and looking to me for mentor-ship. Their approach is different, their research is different and we all have something unique to bring to the table.
    Probably my biggest fault in this area is not being an active follower of people who I respect and admire.
    Thanks for sharing

    • Mandy - Team Forleo

      That’s a really good point, Liz! Sometimes we can learn a lot from people just from observing the things they do that help bring them success.

  120. This episode came just at the right time, thank you Marie. Have been struggling with how to find a consistent Mentor to help me with advise on my ‘light’ journey. I got the way forward, this email came with lots of insight.

  121. Howdy Marie,
    The first idea where you said you don’t need to meet someone to be mentored by them completely resonated with me. Honestly, I’ve been contemplating on whether or not to invest in a mentor and it feels like you’re a Godsend.
    I have just figured out what my life’s purpose is and I am currently taking steps to fulfill this purpose. With that being said, I am dead broke and cannot afford to pay for a mentor/coach. I was thinking about perhaps scrounging up whatever money I could to try and give this whole mentoring thing a shot, but now that I’ve heard your expert advice, I think I’ll just continue to learn from the available resources around me.
    Tony Robbins did say “it’s not resources but resourcefulness that ultimately make the difference,” right? 😉
    The only experience I have with mentorship are the lessons I learn from everything and everyone I encounter, like yourself.
    My purpose is to raise peoples’ awareness and authenticity.
    My hope is that one day, I will be a highly sought after mentor/inspiration to those that want to get real!
    BTW, you’re absolutely awesome Marie. You, Lewis Howes, and Tony Robbins are my mentors that I haven’t met.
    Maybe it’ll happen in the future!
    Until then, STAY AWESOME!!!! 🙂

    • Mandy - Team Forleo

      That’s awesome, Richard! We’re super proud of you for figuring out your life’s purpose and taking steps toward your dreams.

  122. Danielle Thorpe

    Hi Marie! Thanks so much for this timely message. I especially loved your tips about finding more than one mentor and that you can be mentored by someone you haven’t even met! Why didn’t I think of that? LOL But it’s true, we are fortunate to have a wealth of carefully thought out information right at our fingertips through books, podcasts, and the like. This video helped to broaden my perspective on mentorship and definitely takes the pressure off to find that one amazing mentor that will tell me everything I think I need to know. Now I’m off to find at least two or three persons that I am inspired by and work on becoming a committed fan/student, while working on building a great body of work of my own.

  123. You need some Dragons as well to be Calisi– (Spelling funky) Anyway.

    Hi Marie,
    What a fun and insighful video. I have found over the years that looking or working with that one or several mentors has been a bit of a struggle… Either what I want is to unique (A fabulous entertaining fashion design person) or the people in the business are just plain bitches and can’t connect with them.
    SO … I like the idea of looking sideways, this has been something I have considered , but the voice in my head or ideal vision is this grand creator there to mentor me .. just me… Now, I can be confident with looking sideways as well as up.
    Thanks for the video.


  124. Oliver

    Earn Respect and Trust Thru Action:
    It takes a great deal of time to outlay energy and resources in one specific field when you have taken action in the past to spread yourself around in many different areas. That being said, this is the most important thing I can do to encourage response and support from people with the capacity to nudge me forward and further my career and personal development.
    I will look up so videos on how to hook up a truck to a wrecker, verify if I can determine how to do it, research materials, and then if I end up without an answer contact my vehicle recovery instructor and mention I ran into a challenge.
    I will continue to organize the financial documents for the building and I will look at preparing the paper work so I may do the tax returns.
    I will organize all this material on dropbox and consider how I present it to other people living in the building.

    My Experience Needing a Mentor: I always needed a mentor, and while I did not convince my parents I was worthy of mentorship., at thirty I resolved to take matters into my own hands and seek guidance.
    We all need mentors, and I did not know how to get one or ask for one or convince one in person. At 34 I joined the military and when that was not enough I searched on the Internet and found Marie.
    In terms of dos or don’t s when it comes to mentors just like with everyone else it’s best not to over estimate what you can deliver to your mentor. They may want to help you but if you cannot respond or reply to their efforts they will hang you out to dry. Also, right or wrong, some mentors, that you do not care for, may want to share the stage of advancement with you, so if they are supporting you this is a concession you may have to make.

  125. Very cool episode, loved it! Idea #6 was my favorite, the key that opens doors to a good life really!

  126. Thank you Marie. As valuable as always 🙂 You are a true mentor!
    When I saw this new clip come in I was preparing a succinct summary of where I am at with my startup for my new mentor. It’s funny how often your clips reflect what is currently happening in my corner of the planet. Are you looking over my shoulder? 😉
    You have made me realise that I am doing a few things right and reminded me of a couple of very important issues too.
    Firstly … When I first considered my website I naturally turned to two friends, one much younger and the other older. Neither of them knew my world. However, they supported me through all the dangerous days with humour, hugs and brilliant advice. They are still there. They were my first mentors.
    Secondly … in NZ, the government supports the concept of mentors and there is a national agency where you pay an annual subscription and you get a mentor in your district for a year. You need to specify your need and then you are ‘matched’. If something is beyond your mentor’s background a secondary mentor may be brought in to help. I am at the initial meeting stage. I’m nervous but really need this ‘specific’ advice.
    Lastly … Just to just finish off … I would like to add one more point to yours.
    You too can be someone’s mentor!
    And the funny thing? I have a paper in mentoring 😀
    Your mentee always. Thank you!

    • Mandy - Team Forleo

      That’s so cool, Ruth! What an amazing resource that you can sign up to be matched with a mentor for a year. WOW! So glad you’re taking advantage of such a fantastic opportunity.

  127. Ryan

    One word…Polymentory

  128. I love this one so much. Marie YOU are my mentor and have been for a while. 🙂 And we’ve never even met. LOL.
    So is Seth Godin and Steven Pressfield and Oprah and Brene Brown and Elizabeth Gilbert and Tim Ferris.
    All my teachers. All my mentors.
    Such killer advice. I will be passing this on.
    Thank you!

  129. One of the best Marie TVs, but they are all good!! You explain everything so well and I learn’t so much Marie. As always many thanks for all your info and for your uniqueness.

  130. Cindy Melissa Boisvert

    I was burning for hearing the answer to this question. Marie, she’s such an inspiration to me + her whole business and I was struggling in finding and asking for mentorship. That’s true that if you follow and truly care about the content of your inspirational leader in your world, you’ll learn a lot because they already work a lot to put what they know noticed.

    The only downside of not having a mentor is that you cannot learn exactly about your situation. I feel like if you find someone that truly connects with what you want to do, you want to learn the most on how they managed their life up to now (including the struggles they had to get where they are today and you compare it with yours). Having specific information directed to you VS general concepts is different. Since in most cases we get general topics, you’re still not getting the content you’d like (unless it’s a true guidance A-Z, often shown as a coaching program, and it’s RARE to get excellent teaching). The main point in having information out there, it isn’t always enough to get through what you want. Mentorship at least gives you correction on what was wrong and you can have a direct link with your questions, and help you wonder about things you didn’t thought before, helping you grow instantly (and mostly, it helps you get a direct human interaction).

    Just wanted to share this thought, having a mentor is crucial to grow faster. As an example, I would love to ask Marie for mentorship because I have specific but really personal questions about the building-up process side of the business. I would love to get her honest insight, an interview with her or something, that’s not what you can get anywhere else, and that’s the principal reason having a mentor is essential. 🙂

  131. There was good information in the video for me to think about in regards to a new project I am working on.

  132. So this is SPOT on because I literally reached out to someone today about becoming my mentor. After watching this I know that I am moving WAY too fast and that I can continue on my journey of learning from people by observation and if I meet them in person GREAT but perhaps I need to know exactly WHY I want them to mentor me.

    • Mandy - Team Forleo

      Oh wow, so glad this episode came at just the right time! It’s so important to find a mentor who’s the right fit for you, so we’ve got our fingers crossed you’ll find the perfect match.

  133. 100% agree, Marie! I take the approach of learning from various people I trust (you included) to give me good solid advice. When I first started REALLY taking my business seriously… when I stopped letting others telling me what should happen in my business and started listening to my gut… one person did make a big difference in my business by giving me an opportunity to participate in a Mastermind. It was then I fully realized everyone has a different perspective, regardless of their industry or level of experience. I do the first Facebook LIVE Daily Show, and one day I interviewed someone who by all counts is on a “lower” level than me – less experience, less time in the business… but hell! She excelled at something I hadn’t even touched on! I LOVE learning from people regardless of their industry, or experience level. I’ve been doing video shows for 11 years. Sometimes us old farts get too set in our ways. 🙂

    Anyway… long comment so I’ll shut up now. But the only thing I’d add is that while I love absorbing from multiple places, I always go at it with a filter – is this advice right for me and MY business? Will it help or distract?

    Great show, Marie! Thanks for all you, and the entire crew, do!

    • Mandy - Team Forleo

      That’s a really good point, Luria! Our mentions don’t necessarily have to be on a “higher level” than us. Everyone can teach us something. 🙂

  134. Really love the part about not being needy or attached to an outcome. It’s so common for people to expect a lot and then get resentful if people can’t deliver. I think you’re much better off not relying on others, but being a student of all the wonderful wisdom that is already out there. Thanks to the internet there’s virtually nothing left that doesn’t have a body of work around it that’s often freely available 😀 xoxo

  135. Thanks Marie, your advice is right on the money and couldn’t have come at a better time.
    Sending lots of love

  136. Julie

    My approach to mentorship is more like yours in that it has been less formal and has come from a variety of sources. One thing I would like to suggest is to create your own small networks where you can periodically mentor and be mentored, brainstorm ideas together, commiserate, have a good laugh, or whatever the members of the group need. I have a small breakfast group of 3 and we meet once every month or so and have breakfast and conversation. We don’t all work in the same place but the 3 of us have worked together on many projects so our breakfasts are a chance to test drive an idea, or talk about something we are having trouble with and see if someone has had a similar experience and can offer advice. And we celebrate success together!! Everyone in the group takes on different roles at different times in the conversation, sometimes we follow up afterwards but this support group we have created has a variety of purposes for each of us that includes mentoring. The good thing about this approach is that it is in an a casual setting, there is no pressure to be a full time mentor and a variety of perspectives get shared. Sadly one of the group is retiring at the end of the year so we may have to tweak the group or I may need to start a different one but it is a valuable, low pressured way to be coached and supported.

  137. Hi Marie.
    This was great information. I consider every person who has inspired me, a mentor.
    I have been blessed to have so many talented and wise people in real life, one on one, show me how to be the better version of myself. I will always be grateful for that. It
    taught me how to also be a good mentor. Recently during a mentoring session with inner-city girls with parents in the criminal justice system, I asked these teens ‘What do you want to be?’ None of them could imagine what they could become. When I rephrased the question ‘When you were little girls, what did you want to be?’ , the responses were overwhelming. Veterinarian, model, teacher, horseback rider, princess, business owner, boss, policewoman, superhero. I realized the role of a true mentor is to show someone what they can be, not just who they are.
    Thanks again for sharing.
    ps: That chair makes you look tiny. I am tiny and prefer chairs that position me as not so.

    • Mandy - Team Forleo

      That’s such a beautiful way of looking at mentorship, Fred! Thanks for sharing your wisdom.

  138. “polymentory” – ha, love it! Soaking in the wisdom of lots of different people has definitely been my approach to mentoring. Every now and then I come across someone who’s message really, really resonates and then I’ll obsessively read/watch/listen to all their material!

    I’ll always try to reach out in some small way – whether it’s to thank them or share my results – and build a friendship rather than formally asking for mentorship. I remember hearing Gary Vaynerchuck say the comments/messages he receives are his fuel, so I’m making a conscious effort to be less of a “lurker” and contribute to the conversation as a way of showing my gratitude 🙂

  139. Judy

    Thank you so much Marie for the wonderful advice in this video and opening me up to a whole new way of looking at mentorship. I have only acted as a mentor in the past and tended to stretch myself too far. I have today learned I could have directed the mentees in many other directions no doubt equally, or perhaps more, helpful.

  140. Annie Scott

    Marshal Rosenberg who founded Nonviolent Communication said that one of the greatest needs we have as human beings is to contribute – so mentoring someone can be a win win where we might not even be able to tell who is the giver and who is the receiver, I love that it can be a win win flow. The foundations of valuing someone else and yourself need to be in place in my opinion; truly believing in yourself and the other person while fully embracing the ‘ flaws ‘ as well as the exquisiteness of being human so that we don’t put people on a pedestal only to see them fall off or be disappointed because we were looking for a ‘perfect’ mentor.

  141. Jen

    Once again, your content speaks to me at the exact moment I need it. I was just talking to a friend today who was asking for a guru. Before I even watched the video, I warned her away from looking to one person to give you all the answers. I absolutely seek out many mentors in books, blogs, videos, etc. Everyone has something that strikes me, but there isn’t anybody I agree with 100%. I figure I’m gonna wind up pretty amazing, taking all the best pieces from everyone! 😉

    The one thing I have been thinking about lately, and I plan to take action on right away, is being an active fan. It’s one think to watch and read and devour all the wisdom quietly. But you’re right – people need the feedback, and it helps them keep going. We need you all to keep churning out your gems, so we need to truly and proudly proclaim our appreciation for what we’ve learned. Thank you for all your insights, Marie and team. I’ve been lurking for years, but plan to more actively participate in your venture. Thanks for the kick in the rear! xo

  142. Mandy Kaur

    Hey Maria,
    As always, thank you for providing honest, realistic and relevant advice. It’s what keeps me coming back to your videos. In April, I became clear about my vision and purpose in life (best feeling ever) and I automatically knew I wanted to approach you to be my Mentor. I remember sitting with my website developers, showing them aspects of your new website that I LOVED (imitation is the greatest form of flattery), they were impressed with your work and I literally said yup, I’m going to ask her to be my Mentor, her and Oprah =)
    While I have done literally nothing until this very moment to act on that thought, this video was a sign that I must ask to receive. So Marie…I feel like I’m about to ask you out on a date, I am that nervous lol. I will not ask you to be my Mentor…yet. Instead I will implement these strategies you just mentioned AND put out into the universe that we will work on a project together one day, be on a show together and do great work. My website launches in 2 weeks, I will post a reply to this comment with the link, hopefully the internet gods bring it to your attention. Keep up the great work, let me know if you need anything from me =)

  143. libs

    Marie, you say no one has all the answers…but if feels like you do! 🙂
    I wanna be part of your team. you are awesome!thanks for making such a big difference to my life.

  144. Stephen DeBenedet

    As an experienced professional he one aspect I’ve found most valuable is “reverse mentoring” with young early career colleagues to get their perspectives. This helps me to stay fresh and make mentoring a two way street.
    Thanks for sharing your insights Marie!

  145. jäz

    Yes. Thank you! My experience is when you have one mentor it can be harder to grow. Namely to grow outside of that particular role of being a student of some kind and unknnowingly your mentor keeps you smaller than you have already grown to be! I often experience the feeling of growing out of things fast. I am greatful for all that I was taught by a person but I feel I get the core of what I need to grow quick and want to move on to the next level instead of staying the “star student”. So it feels reassuring that it is great to have many mentors, also get free online advice and yes, not forgetting our peers! it can be such a surprising and great bonding experience discovering your “partner in crime” is right next to you all this time! Thank you for all the inspiration

  146. Andrea

    I guess we can all agree now that you’ve been a mentor for all of us here for as long as each of us has been following your work, Marie. I only realized it now, while listening to you. Thank you for all the effort and thought you put into each episode.

    I’m not sure if I ever needed a mentor outside of school, but one would have been good during my early years, when I had no idea what to do with my skills and love for nature. After 17 years (!!) of formal training I did find a mentor who cares about my academic development, is supportive and has taught me a lot.

    So now I’m doing my PhD on something I never imagined that I would ever even be in contact with. Who knows what will happen after that is finished.

    The good part is that I will still have the wisdom of all those before me and a great community to share everything with.
    Thank you, Marie, and keep up the awesome work, everyone!

  147. Deborah

    Thanks Marie!
    My biggest challenge is getting clear, focused and taking constructive action. I have too many ideas and am working on not getting overwhelmed with the fact that I have no income coming in only a short time to start making money! I have been toying with the IDEA of being an entrepreneur for almost 4 years now (about the time I first found you via Kris Carr) and now I just HAD to quit my last job, so I have no choice. The thought of working for someone else in a traditional job now turns my stomach; I’ve been unable to find employment that begins to align with my core values in a way that makes work bearable. After 14 years of pure failure at “real” jobs and little to show for them, I’ve made the decision to feed my soul authentically. But, I don’t have a plan, and that’s scaring me silly. Trying to stay calm…

  148. Nat

    Brilliant Marie. Really needed to hear this today.

    Small snafu in pronunciation of Katlego: Its a common mispronunciation of this beautiful South African name.
    So Katlego’s name is not pronounced with a LEGO at the end. The G is pronounced the same way as when you pronounce Ahmed properly (not Aaaaamed! Agggggmed 😉
    And the O at the end is not pronounced O as in Open but O as in Orator.

  149. I love this post Marie! You just confirmed some of my own feelings about mentorship by sharing your own. I have always felt uneasy about seeking out one mentor as it’s too much to expect one person to guide another when they have their own mission on the go. I also agree that you will inevitably not have the same experience and or strengths as your mentor so you need be open to the influences and learnings from numerous sources. Books, podcasts and posts like yours have helped me so much and continue to do so. Thanks for being one of my great mentors.

    • Christiane Rigos Salgueiro

      Hi Renee I feel the same way you do 🙂

  150. Madi Spence

    It’s actually something of a relief to hear you talk on this subject – every company I’ve worked for has pushed the idea of a single mentor quite hard. In one organisation, I even had a mentor assigned to me at random (a total disaster – while they were great, I had never looked up to them particularly, and found the conversations we had to have really awkward!). I really believe that you learn from a whole range of people, why would you limit yourself to calling just one of these people a mentor?

  151. This is all fantastic and sometimes you need one-on-one advice concerning a specific challenge. It’s great to have someone on the outside looking in. In my business, I sometimes feel so involved in what I’m doing, I can’t see the big picture or alternate solutions. Nothing can beat face-to-face one-on-one mentorship. Our mentor is retired, so he has the timeexperience and he’s been through a lot in his various businesses. We are so thankful to have him and he enjoys sharing his wisdom.
    Thanks Marie, you’re awesome!

  152. Thank you so much for this video. I have many mentors I ‘ve been following you for years, and you Marie are one of my favorite people , you are a great teacher and I can see you love what you do. I totally agree with you that we can learn from many different people and also from the ones who really know us deeply. I also think that going to workshops and courses like the ones I have the privilege of attending in Brazil can be really helpful and change our lives radically. All the answers we need are inside us the mentors just help us to find them. Thanks again and next year I will be enrolled on B School 🙂

  153. Thanks for being an awesome mentor Marie! Helpful as always, I realize I’m surrounded by mentors. From my circle of entrepreneurs and the mentors I haven’t met but read and listen to daily, I have great support already in place. Thanks for confirming that I’m on the right track and I don’t really need one person to call a mentor to help my business thrive!

  154. Nevena

    It is truth.I ‘ve learned from tv, books you tube and frends.
    Few of my friends says that I mentored them a lot’s of times.
    Mary this was great !

  155. Emy

    This is sooo true! My tribe of mentors are currently all virtual! And I have to tell you that the universe has a way of working. When I’m stuck in my business I always get information from one of them precisely at the time I need it that helps me navigate through the problem. Marie FYI you’re part of my tribe of mentors by the way. Thank you for all the work that you do!

  156. I once had a mentor worth $40 million … he was able to teach me a lot about business, real estate, investing, selling, etc… We went golfing one day and he shanked a ball over the fence and it hit a truck’s windshield. He ran to the golf cart and started to speed away to hide! I was shocked and asked if he was going to see if the driver was OK … he looked confused and said “no” … I learned a valuable lesson and will now only choose mentors with values similar to mine. It’s not about the money. I’ve found that the more I come from the heart and help others, the more money comes my way …

  157. This was great! I don’t necessarily have mentors, although I do have a personal coach and a marketing coach, both of whom are invaluable (and of course, I pay for their services). Because I’m a consultant with a unique place in the market and a unique perspective, it’s easy for me to feel isolated. I am also a hugely creative and love to be on the cutting edge, so it’s hard for me to find peers, let alone mentors! This episode of Marie TV was helpful bcs it made me realize I already HAVE mentors — including you! I follow a handful of people — including you — whom I deeply respect and admire (and want to meet!) and appreciate the advice to shift gears and become a rabid fan. You can expect me to become a creepy stalker in the near future! (Just kidding! 😉 Thanks, as always, for a great episode! 🙂

  158. Emily

    I spend an inordinate amount of time just gazing longingly at that painting in the background every. single. video.
    Can you tell me who or where it came from??

  159. Hi Marie,

    I want to offer commentary specifically part 2 of your question.

    My experience with mentors is similar to yours as over the years I’ve learned from countless virtual mentors. Some of which include the delightful Marie Forleo amongst a handful of her NYC peers such as, “Smarty Pants” Derek Halpern & Ramit Sethi, and the incredibly insightful Seth Godin.

    Each of these virtual mentors have allowed me to learn at my own pace while picking up what I can from their content with topics relevant to me and whatever scenario I might’ve found myself in at the time.

    I’m happy to say there’s a plethora of keen lil nuggets in each and every article, email or video I’ve had the pleasure to watch or read. Especially here on MarieTV (I’m in <3 with the new website btw, it's absolutely stunning)!!

    Working with a direct mentor over the years and providing some mentorship of my own, I've learned that you have to be respectful of your mentor's time and to act on their advice when they're advising from a place of experience they might be seeing you in now.

    If you choose NOT to act when prompted, that could be a great way to spoil the relationship. That's the last thing you want to do.

    Imagine going through all the hoops to gain a mentor and have them write you off because you're "unteachable" and have wasted their time.

    Not a good feeling for either party.

    Another way to be respectful is to NOT bombard or overwhelm your mentor or potential mentor with constant requests or complaints about your current situation.

    A mentor is not your therapist.

    You should consider yourself lucky if you've gained the opportunity for someone of stature to take you under their wing and show you the ropes, advising you on certain pitfalls they'd prefer you avoid because they know first hand the pain of experiencing it themselves.

    Lastly, not all direct mentors have the same amount of time to commit to you as another might.

    If you're fortunate enough to learn from one direct mentor or even more than one, then understanding their time is precious and important is paramount.

    It's best to recognize time a finite resource and to stay on good terms with your mentor, you need to show her that you know how to make the most of limited interactions and that by quickly applying her lessons and taking action you show that you're worthy of ongoing mentorship.

    One more fine point to note.

    When acquiring a new mentor, you do not want to come off as annoying or pushy.

    Some mentors will prefer to keep you at bay until you've proven you're a worthy protege. So when reaching out, you need a clear strategy on how often you attempt to connect.

    Depending on where your potential mentor is in her career, she may only have time to connect with you for 10-15 mins a month in the early stages of your relationship. And over time as you prove yourself, you might be allotted more time for deeper connection.

    Some mentors would love to hear from you every week, or every other week. While others would prefer to connect with you once a month or once a quarter.

    It's up to you to determine how often you reach out, but be STRONGLY advised that there's a fine line between being perceived as persistent and being annoying/pushy.

    How's that MarieTV, detailed and specific enough for you?

    Love your show,


  160. Claudia Da Silva

    You’ve made an impact in my life. Thank-you!

  161. Ok . I have to say it, you’re my mentor! 😉
    Thank you for everything.


  162. I have had a mentor and also been a mentor… while I don’t have the same opinion as Marie, this is still a SUPER helpful episode of MarieTV for everyone!

    Inspiration can be found everywhere, and so can mentors! Especially good reminder to look around you and look to your peers for help and support. 🙂

  163. Nida

    Fantastic and very helpful episode Marie . I admit I’ve come across needy even to you . I’ve learne from this

  164. I lean by watching and listening. I only follow those with faith , hope and .most of all

    I learn by warching & listening. I only follow those who act with faith, hope & mostly love. Without whichwe can not have courage. My point of reference as a starting point is Jehovab God. Because that keeps the innocence.

  165. Pam

    #2 is most relevant to me right now – look for MANY sources of mentorship. I think it’s important to get different perspectives from people both above you and along side you (yes I realize I snuck #3 in there also ?) I loved all 6 tips – Marie always delivers what you need to hear. Thank you.

  166. Dannette

    Hi Marie,

    Spot on again with this subject! Loved the first point and the last point! Which is why I am posting here NOW! YOU are my mentor, I watch, listen and inhale everything that you do and now I am committed to sharing with you your impact on my personal and professional life.

    Just recently I was asked to be a mentor by a collegue. My first instinct was to say “who me?”; but because I know that this is a sabateur talking, that in fact, if someone is asking me, then they already beleive that I CAN, that I will wear the perspective that indeed I CAN, and I accepted request. Because what would Marie say??

    To your last point, showing up in this world as an authentic human being and giving back is a cornerstone of my life philosophe. I have an expression that I want to share with you, my mantra; “to live an ordinary life, extraordinarliy”. Helping people, supporting collegues, doing the right thing on whatever level we can.

    Marie, you are extraordinary and are living your life extraordinarily impacting so many people. Keep on mentoring girl!

    And you make a much better Kalisie!

  167. Hi Marie,

    Very interesting.

    I work with contemporary visual artists and for 20 years I have been telling them that in order to gain access to a gallery to represent their work – they must at least show some sort of interest in the gallery! Ie visited it, know the other artists that show there, does their work fit, do they like the space – meet the staff – do they relate to them, feel that they can work with them – as after all it’s these staff that have to have a relationship with them that is strong enough to represent and sell their work. So many artists just do the rounds of galleries hoping to get one, without any real interest in the space, and so many gallerists take on an artist without a real relationship with them or a deeper understanding of their work. This has always been, in my opinion, pivotal, in the long term success of both artist and gallery – and it is again reiterated today by Marie in the context of becoming a ‘fan’. It is a tried and true formula that works.

  168. Many thanks for this video. Its great to hear that you don’t actually have to be physically with your mentor for them to be your mentor. There are many inspiring people I follow online including yourself who I can now proudly call my mentors. Thank you for the work that you do. Your videos are inspiring and motivate me to follow my dreams. Much love Jaina x

  169. Thanks for the new perspective, Marie.
    One great book showed me the path to my business. After reading it I wanted to take a seminar with the author. The seminar didn’t take place but the author generously gave me severals hours of counseling for free! Without this, I would have given up.
    So many great people out there give there knowledge for free in their blogs or in affordable online-courses, they all have helped me lot, including you. I am very grateful to all of them.

  170. Pamela Church

    At mid-life, my experience with mentorship has been quite a journey finding the RIGHT fit at the right time over the last few years spending $1,000’s. Looking at the second half of my life, I knew I needed to short-cut the process of some of possible mistakes I could make becoming an entrepreneur on my own.

    I have learned from many wonderful mentors and always put my 100% trust in who I’m working with at the time. This way, I know I will do everything they tell me with no doubts about how I’m spending my time. If you can’t trust your mentor fully, then its tough to move ahead as fast in the learning process.

    Now, I have the competence from mentorship giving me the confidence and mindset I needed to help others take action on their dreams and desires. I always knew to keep learning from mentors and not to do it alone and encourage others to seek mentorship.

    Do’s & don’ts
    Do Find a mentor who resonates with you and not just one who has a huge income. If you don’t enjoy working with someone, you will waste your time that could have been spent having fun while learning with someone you can relate with.
    DO find a mentor who pushes you to become better and has you out of your comfort zone.
    Do seek a mentor whose students are succeeding and living the lifestyle you desire.
    Do consider a mentor who has come from a place that is similar or worse than where you are now.
    Do train under a mentor who ‘runs a tight ship’ and doesn’t allow one person on the team to be a nuisance in any way and bring down the group’s level mentorship.
    Do research mentors through their books and audios to see if their information is valuable to you.

    Don’t stay with a mentor who isn’t doing or has done what they’re telling you to do themselves.
    Don’t pay a mentor who has no social proof of the success or level of success you want to reach.
    Don’t leave a mentor because things get tough before taking a look at yourself because you may be getting close to a breakthrough. If you can’t get to a breakthrough, then find additional mentors or another one, but it’s wise to always have mentor(s).

  171. Molly

    As someone who’s in the process of building my “tribe”, these 6 tips weren’t anything out of the ordinary but so good in that they are simple and keep me on the move and not stuck. Ironically, you were the result of a mentor request! I reached out (via email) and got a very polite and supportive “thanks but no thanks but here’s someone who I speak very highly of…” Glad she did! Your site/Social media has been very helpful and inspirational!

    • Kristin - Team Forleo

      We’re so happy to hear you’ve found our site and Marie’s work so helpful, Molly!

  172. Marianne

    Love this—so practical and absolutely true. I never thought of the people I follow/read/listen to as mentors per se but OF COURSE THEY ARE!

  173. What a great episode. I’ve often felt guilty for calling people like you, Brene Brown, Elizabeth Gilbert and Simon Sinek my mentors. I truly agree with you, I’ve learned SO much from all their work simply by participating in their programs, reading their books and seeing them speak. It’s a blessing really, it takes the pressure off both parties and I can be as “involved” with my mentors as my schedule allows. I’m thankful for this era where we have endless people doing incredible work that inspires and motivates the rest of us to keep pursuing our dreams. Thanks to the viewer for asking this great question, and thanks Marie for another outstanding episode!

    • Kristin - Team Forleo

      You’re so welcome, Ali! So glad you’re here with us and feel so inspired by Marie’s work 🙂

  174. Having been a mentor, teacher, and avid student, here is the one thing I have found, Go beyond what is required to show that you can about your mentor or your students so that they know that they know that you are the one who they must pay attention to engage and watch.

    Take a look at what special perspective, talent, engagement, or opportunity you bring to the table so your presence and participation both as a mentor or student leaves an indelible imprint on whoever you engage with as being a open, stable, generous, and reliable space they want to know more about.

    I have been a avid fan at the New York Public Library’s SIBL (Science, Industry, and Business Library) for over 18 years out of its 20 year history. Instead of being just an ordinary patron, I made myself visible by sharing with the librarians here what I am doing in my business and the success and challenges I faced creating my ideal client strategy of preeminence for my business.

    The staff literally saw my live, eat breathe, and demonstrate proficiency in utilizing their resources to the point where they saw me an invaluable asset to this institution’s well being. I have brought over 700 people personally here to this facility and educated them about SIBL’s invaluable resources.

    Due to my indispensable asset to SIBL, I know have my own personal office here and the librarians introduced me at their business plan competition as being the expert in knowing how to find, interpret, and implement granular market research in order to attract a business’ circles of influence and bring its cause effectively to the marketplace.

    I am looking forward to meeting Maria here when she speaks here next month.

    Remember-show up and give more than what is expected will give you big returns.

    Henry Pierre

  175. I LOVE this! I’ll just go be a sponge now and take all the mentor goodness I can from everywhere and anywhere!

    I especially loved number three. It’s exactly why I created Yoga Teacher Circles and have a Sister Circle program on its way. We can learn so much from our peers, most especially when we learn how to give and receive with them. Asking for what we need, and offering our own wisdom back at them when they ask for it. There is power in our connections!

  176. Once again, thank you for your solid advice, Marie!

    I’m with you in that I listen to youtube interviews and podcasts all-the-time. They’re invaluable!

    Where I need to step up my game is … Getting IN the Game! of leaving feedback, sharing achievements & joining the conversation.

    As one of your B-School & Copy Cure students, I’ve had many Aha’s and Qs – but nerves have always stopped me from sharing them.

    This Q&A is where that becomes an old habit. I’m brushing those fears off my shoulder (and getting in the arena 🙂

    Thank you again for another morsel of clarity, Rie!

  177. Dan

    Great stuff Marie! Particularly like the “lateral” mentor. Soooo true many mentors are talking stuff way ahead of those just starting out and fail to realize the overwhelm. Keep up the great work and attitude Marie!

  178. Karen

    Most awesome, relevant and timely video. Love it! Show up, be consistent and be a genuine fan and supporter. I love the lateral mentor and even mentors who are below you. We can all learn something from everyone, regardless of where they stand in life. I learn from everyone. Everyone that I come into contact with adds value to my life, as long as I’m open to learning the lesson.
    Great work!

  179. Donna

    I have been enjoying your videos for quite a while but have never commented to let you know how much I appreciate you. Thanks for this video and #5 🙂

  180. Hi Marie,
    This is the first video I’ve watched since signing up, and it jumped out when I opened my email because mentoring has been on my mind recently, including right before switching on my computer! Like Lisa and others, I found I am already doing some of the things on your list, which was so encouraging. You also dissolved lots of angst about it when I realised this, especially with your advice to be specific. I do this already but just had never thought of it as asking for mentorship!
    I agree with you that no one person has all the answers – for me that’s because I am unique and what I am offering is unique also.
    Thank you so much for your work, I’m looking forward to seeing what goodies are in the signup pack, and will make an appointment to read and watch every week!

  181. Nick

    Funny, in Australia asking someone to be your mentor is not a dreaded question. But it looks like almost everyone seems not to really understand mentoring. Mentoring is a stepping stone. With rare exception one would never stay with one mentor, but might have one they always turn back to.
    What I have found, and been told, if you have the right attitude the mentor will come to you. Get out there and talk to mentors you know, but ask if they know someone they can recommend to mentor you. If you explained yourself well enough you’ll be surprized and the answer you get.
    For me, things are different. I don’t need a mentor. I need money.

  182. Edith Sutmuller

    Thank you Marie for this video. And yes, there are a lot of mentors in the world. I always follow / watch /read the lessons of Oprah, Deepak Chopra, Eckhart Tolle and now since a couple of months I got the tip to watch your Q&A and I am so happy for it, as you have become a new mentor.

  183. I completely agree, thank you so much for this. There is almost a pressure on us to find ‘the ONE’ not only when it comes to love but also in business. I believe almost everyone I meet is a mentor of sorts, there are no accidental encounters and having a no expectations attitude in all aspects of life yields unexplainable results – hustling in the real world or getting lost in YouTube (where I found Marie several years ago)!

  184. Thanks for this video. It had a lot of great information and was very inspiring.

    I would like a mentor. I actually just attended a Women in Leadership Conference on Tuesday and reached out to someone on Wednesday to be my mentor. But after watching this video I now know that I need to ask more persons to be a mentor and not only have one.

    #4 be Specific not vague, was the most important of the 6 tips for me.

  185. Merari

    All 6 of these helped verify them because I am currently in action of these. I don’t have many to the side of me right now, so I am going to be on a hunt for that. I also learned some of these through a mentor that I had. Another one that I really like is to constantly crave feedback. That can help with looking to the side, people may be trying to mentor you when you don’t even realize it!

    I had a mentor 6 years. Having one mentor is not what it is chalked up to be, from having a just one mentor, even though he had global views is still person and 1 exact perception. Everyone has 1 perception. I realized that I had narrowed my outlook on things. Now I make it a point to get multiple perspectives and really juice out the mentorship by writing my own thoughts on what I learn, just as Marie gives us an opportunity here. It’s so important to reflect in order to absorb the mentorship you receive.

  186. Teresa

    Hello Marie &team you all are Awesome !!!!

    In my experience mentors are someone who have a deep sense of inspiring and helping someone. I’ve sought few people who normally would not mentor because they don’t wanna share their deep success secrets etc.
    Choose a mentor who actually made it to the top by struggles and is willing to help others.
    I recently had mentor to help me start my coaching business , but he recommended I join him and help him pitch. he would always make fun of his previous employers and wanted to prove them wrong. So for me it was an alarm :1. Good people will let you live ur dreams not Thiers. 2. True successful people will never do anything to prove someone wrong they solely wanna do it for their own satisfaction and peace. Proving others wrong who did not believe in them is just a side effect of successful entrepreneurs..

    Thanks a lot Marie for anwersing this question so well n I’m definitely continue looking for diff people as my mentors of which you are my favourite 🙂 xoxo

  187. Hi, Marie! It’s my first comment on your site, but I have been a silent fan for some time now. I think of you as my “virtual” mentor. Your advice is spot-on always and I think you are the perfect role model for women who want to achieve great things and go places.

    Just know that you have taught tons of people so much just by sharing what you know 🙂

    • Kristin - Team Forleo

      Shamaila, thank you so much for adding your voice to the conversation! It’s wonderful to hear from you. Thrilled to hear that Marie is such a great virtual mentor for you 🙂

  188. Dallas Polite

    Loved this topic?
    I have definitely learned that depending on one mentor can be stressful or add to unnecessary stress on both parts especially when it comes down to personality types. This comment stems from my personal experiences, I function better when I can draw from many outlets/sources and they combine to direct me in my own path for my individual goals/success. Having a mentor is a great thing, and having more than one source to pull from and learn from as added mentors is even better because a lot of the time your personal mentor will direct you to other sources to read, listen, or to or study. All of the technology that surrounds us can play a huge part in finding the right sources to mentorYun, so many outlets, and many ways to access them.

    Thanks Marie!
    Absolutely ❤ your episodes informative, sweet, and to the point!

  189. When I started to watch MarieTv today, I did so from a ‘wanting a mentor’ place but the more I listened, the more I saw that I kind of am the mentor for some people and everything Marie said rang true.

    I’m an author and although I haven’t made it to the best-seller list (yet!!! 🙂 I do have a lot of new authors (or people who want to start writing) approach me with questions. As you said in today’s episode, I love specific questions and the general interest in some guidance or advice. On the other hand, I find it frustrating when someone approaches me, super excited about their book idea….but they want ME to write it FOR them. I always let them know that since it is their idea and they feel so excited and inspired by it, chances are only they can communicate it in the way it deserves to be presented. Often times, they seem surprised that I’m not as excited about the proposition to write their book and they are for me to do so – true story!

    Which comes to another point made in this episode: I want the other person to make the effort. Often these ideas fall flat as soon as the person approaching me learns that they have to do all the work.

    On the other hand, I’ve had other people approach me with clear questions or asking for something specific. I have one author who wants help with her writing and occasionally sends me a chapter to review and asks for my feedback. I’m happy to do so but I always point out what stands out (good and the bad), what I would add or change and why. I tell her to take my advice with a grain of salt since I don’t claim to be the expert writer, but I do have some experience and have learned a few things along the way. The fact that she understands that my schedule is crazy busy and isn’t pushy actually encourages me to help her out faster and as much as I can. I’m definitely happy to be of service to her.

    I think when you’re ambitious, you also recognize that trait in other people. For example, most of my close friends are super, insanely busy because they also have big dreams and goals. Of course, I also recognize the people who aren’t as ambitious and am generally less inclined to help those who aren’t willing to put the work into their goals.

    I also think that being asked specifically to be someone’s mentor automatically puts a strange power shift in the relationship. Not everyone is comfortable feeling like they are on a pedestal and it also puts a lot of pressure on the mentor to feel that they have to have all the answers or that if anything goes wrong, it’s their fault for giving advice that may not work for the person asking.

    Another great MarieTV. As usual:-)

  190. Loved this , was just writing about finding my tribe for Natalie Sisson’s 10 Day Blog Challenge, and Marie Forleo happens to be on the top of my list.

  191. MK Clay

    Thank you, Marie, for generously providing Marie TV! I have been watching for over a year thanks to the recommendation of one of your B-Schoolers and it has been incredibly helpful for me to find ‘my thing’ that I can give the world. I have gotten practical steps to change my life in the way that I can give the world what I have to make it a better place. The best part of Marie TV for me is the vibrancy and authenticity of your voice and the content. I’ve also found so many other people doing great things whom I can learn from in your interviews. The mentorship I’ve gotten from your blog has been invaluable and it’s beautifully done. Thank you, Marie, and thank you, Team Forleo!

  192. Larell Scardelli

    Lovely, and so relevant at any point in a career. I especially liked the tip about finding many mentors vs. one, because gaining insight from a variety of intelligent, caring, and thoughtful peers, gives you the opportunity to piece together a solution for yourself. It makes you a great problem solver, and not dependent on any one person! Thanks, Marie.

  193. Sara Kimball

    Thank you so much for this video! I have been struggling for almost a year with feeling the need for mentorship but feeling that everyone I would want to mentor me is too far away (geographically). I am going to relax now knowing that I can allow myself to be mentored and guided more informally and from various sources. And I was also inspired to shift my thinking on mentoring to include some of my peers, who are already fulfilling that role, I just never named them as such. Just what I needed to hear today! Thank you!

  194. Nica Comenta

    Oh, thank you so much for this veryyyy insightful video! I have been thinking of finding a mentor to help me be a better writer and the one person I know within reach is veryy busy. Since I also don’t have money to join in to my dream class, your very own Copy Cure, I have been contented with engaging myself with free materials online. I didn’t know that by so doing I have actually begun mentorship. I know I still have to do more of what you’ve said to learn more. Thank you so much, Marie, for mentoring me. You always know what to say though I have never told you what I need. You seem to know how to read what’s in my heart and mind. You and your team must be inspired by heaven! More power to you, guys! xoxo, Nica

    • Caroline - Team Forleo

      This is so awesome, Nica! Thank you so much for your kind comment, and it’s great to hear that you’ve been digging into some amazing free material online. We’d love to have you in Copy Cure in the future when the timing is right, and in the meantime, we’re excited to share more great MarieTV content with you each week! xo

  195. Hey Marie.
    Your videos always help me to refocus and regroup when it comes to all of my creative projects. I loved this video because it reminded me of a time in my life when I wasn’t looking for a mentor at all, but because I was working hard, with passion and positivity, several showed up, in real-life, book, and online form.
    Everything is the same at its core, and I needed the reminder. Like when you reread The Alchemist for the first time in two years and see everything around you for its magic. Thanks for being here to pull me back into the flow every time I need it!

  196. I actually just stumbled onto your one of your you tube videos recently, while looking for a Tony Robbin videos. I thought how did I not know about you! I really enjoy that you are real, realistic and fun in your videos. You have a ton a great information in your videos and in your interviews also. This one was great timing for me because I also struggle with the whole mentor ship thing. Thank you for your advice on this matter, very helpful! Your pretty awesome keep that stuff up!

  197. Ayo

    I had a mentor when I was 17 years old (ten years ago). She is the one who really got me into reading self-help books. At the time, she recommended that I read Tony Robbins’ AWAKEN THE GIANT WITHIN; Victor Frankl’s MAN’S SEARCH FOR MEANING; and the Gospels. It’s been 10 years, I’ve read hundreds of books but, I have only started AWAKEN THE GIANT WITHIN. After working with that mentor for about a year she moved to Arizona (I never heard from her again) and I haven’t had a mentor since. But, I had the idea that I could have any mentor I wanted, dead or alive, when I read about Napoleon Hill’s council in Think and Grow Rich.
    Thanks for this. I’m going to go read those books, now. Cheers.

  198. So many fabulous points in this video. I love the idea of having multiple mentors that you don’t even know. It made me realize just how many mentors I’ve had that have really changed my life and they have no clue who I am. That includes you Marie! 🙂 I also love this point because when I have focused my time and energy on one specific person, who does know me, it has not always been a good thing. This has happened multiple times. Some people take advantage when you look up to them with the “guru” mentality. You have to trust yourself and become a filter for information shared with you. Some of it works perfectly for you and some just isn’t something you should take into your life. Not every mentor has all the answers. I’ve been a mentor to some of my dance students and I have to say that I always approach it with “this was my experience, yours might be different”. This way they can take what I’ve learned and use it if it works or not. On a side note is it crazy that so many of your videos answer questions that I have to the point where I’m talking to myself saying “yes, that’s it” or “OMG why didn’t I think of that”! Love your work a ton and really appreciate that you share your thoughts. Thanks, have a great day!

  199. Thank you for this post, I am going to try it out and let you know how I make out!

  200. I’m with you Marie. I don’t think you need just one. I learn from so many, including you! I once had a woman who wanted to be my mentor/biz coach. She wouldn’t let me pay her, which I really didn’t like because I believe you need to invest to grow. Instead, she wanted to have me barter with her. She’d coach me and I’d do a little marketing for her.
    The relationship did NOT work out. She got real possessive and passive aggressive with me. And she wanted to have my kids caller her “Auntie”. It was weird.
    So…mentor under those who you respect and would like to know better, even if you never meet. You can learn from everyone. God brings you new opportunities daily. Grab them and make the most of each moment.

  201. Thank you so much for all that you do Marie! I loved this video. And, was looking out for a mentor. Thank you for cutting through the crap and keeping it real. Love your way.

    • Caroline - Team Forleo

      Thank you so much for your lovely note, Jude! xo

  202. Trina

    Appreciate the Tips^^ Thank you.
    I have tried to find a mentor and failed over and over. This helps break it down and I feel better about it. I now realize I already have mentors. The importance of different views and peers makes sense:) As always, I dig your ability to see clearly and convey it. In Gratitudee~

    • Caroline - Team Forleo

      Thank you so much, Trina! We’re so glad you found this episode helpful. xo

  203. awesome episode,my peers are my best mentors,they are one who i need at times.To be a mentor or to have a mentor works when people have good view with each other and the trust that matters most.Trying to be mentor is far difficult when you cant give complete solution.

  204. Douglas Bartlett

    Thanks for a great show again, Marie. I already engage in ‘polymentoring’ and I drop into your site from time to time to get – yes – a different point of view! I was really engaged by the idea to support mentors and I’ll take more action to recognise and cheer on great work. There is someone I recently met who has the kind of work and career I would love to have, and I can see him being a great mentor, so this is a really exciting time for me!
    On another perspective: I am finding more and more that I’m guiding others and providing support and advice. So I need to be more aware and consistent with them too.
    To your success!

  205. Nira Sheppard

    I really love this episode. I want to start a new career but I realized instead of just looking for a new job I should get a mentor. Even getting started on this task has been mentally daunting for me but your first point gave me so much relief and motivation. There are hundreds of mentors I already have access to through media. All of your other points were great too! Thank you Marie and Marie’s team!

  206. so wonderful!

    my best mentors have definitely appeared when i was doing what i love, following my path and passions, and doing so with dedication and openness. like you say, this is how real relationships develop. i think it is also okay to seek out mentors too, and the biggest takeaway there is to do so without expectations and attachment. i also love looking to your peers, which can be really overlooked when trying to climb.

    such an important and helpful topic — thank you, Marie!

    • Caroline - Team Forleo

      Thank you so much, Sophia. We’re so glad you enjoyed this episode!

  207. Steve

    What a timely episode as I was just asked to BE a mentor. Thanks Marie !

  208. Thank you Marie for your amazing job. Sometimes I write for women, only in Spanish (with no comercial interest)

  209. Daniel

    Hi Marie, thank you so much for all of your videos, specially this one that gave me the answer for what I needed to clarify, regarding start Life Coaching full time.
    I have been practicing for a good number of years by helping people at various type of life, when asked for, or it will come in a conversation that it needed a helping word to clear one’s mind; I did only practice occasionally and free of any charges.
    Now, because I have to retire from my main profession affected by my age, I have decided to start doing Life Coaching full time for a fee.
    I was a bit indecisive what to do and how to start. And in this video you just gave me exactly what I needed to know to go ahead. Thank you.

    • Caroline - Team Forleo

      That’s so wonderful to hear, Daniel. Thank you so much for your comment, and we’re sending our best wishes for your new life coaching biz!

  210. Hey Marie its only been recently that I have started following you & I look up to you as one of my mentors to get knowledge & inspiration. I liked the idea of having more mentors as I have many who I follow. My only problem was I wasn’t consistent due to time constrains but what you said makes so much sense. Especially If your life is getting affected because of some one’s videos or books we need to acknowledge it & give them their due respect & accolades they deserve. So hence forth I will make it a point to pen down my comments. Thank you once again.

  211. Thanks for this video, Marie!
    Really enjoyed the reminder to be specific and not just come with vague pleas of “help me” or “notice me”. It makes me feel like it’s about respecting myself and other people, not just dumping needs out there.
    Okay gotta get out there and bust my butt now.

  212. CorneliA.

    Hey Marie,
    this was your first video I came across a few weeks ago and actually it was kind of accidently, when I was actually listening to some of the videos of Terry Savelle Foy (don’t know if you know her, she is also a great motivation for me).
    And as you love comments I thought of sharing actually my experiences which I made during my practical semester which I did in India (I’m actually born and brought up in Germany but from the heart latino-indian 😉
    So I was in India for 8 month and during that time, due to my boss, working environment and cultural differences, I had also quiet a few heavy moments when I just felt that I don’t want to carry on, I just want to quit everything, and I really mean EVERYTHING…
    So at that time there was a girl working with me in the same office, she was our secretary, it was her first job after her studies, so she was still very young (22) and she became a really good friend of mine. All started that she was giving me language classes in her mother language, which is called Kannada and spoken in the state of Karnataka.
    (And she had one really great every day morning office habit: she would search quotes on google for a few minutes and then write one of them which she feels most appropriate for that day on the white board next to her desk as “Thought of the day”, so that everyone can read it.)
    So long story short…
    Whenever I felt low, I took her, went for a small walk outside the office and started talking to her… but… not necessarily about my problems but moreover I was listening to her, to what she was facing in life, to her goals and dreams and suddenly I found myself encouranging her, telling about my past experiences (I already had 30 years of it) and finally I ended up being her mentor… and at the same time, which I just rediscovered and remembered today, I was my own mentor aswell…
    Now I’m again back to Germany, she is still in India and still we are in touch (thanks to WhatsApp) and from time to time I have some motivational spirit, especially when she tells again about all the obstacles she is facing on her way to come to Germany for her studies. So one day I send her a voice message and today only I thought, I should actually listen to it aswell… I felt like, oh wow, my voice sounds actually really nice on that record… and that message is so powerfull, I should listen to that more frequently…
    So ya, sometimes it’s like helping others, that we actually and finally at the same time we are helping ourselves aswell… and like this mentoring even ourselves…
    Thanks all for being patient and reading my comment-story
    CorneliA 🙂

  213. Jaiza

    I now consider Marie my mentor. I’ve been watching her videos/website and I try to apply what I’ve learned.

    Thanks Marie for being an inspiration! You are a blessing.

  214. Daniel

    Hi Marie

    Thank you so much for all of your email talk clips. As far I can hear, you are brilliant in all of your expressions and presentations. Your videos are teaching ways that can help anyone. And that attitude of expression is admirable.
    Many moments your clips have so much to think about from your descriptions. That is the reason by looking at the feedback there are many that they love it with appreciation.

    Now relating to this video; most people like to have a mentor as a guide, but one should never take a word of advice from one only, because we are all individual humans with different upbringing, education and principals. And our individual point of view automatically will be different from one to another that cannot be applied always for the next individual for a similar point to be resolved. At any moment all hawsers must come from the subject with help of the mentor, to make sure that there are no negative expressions or actions.

    What I have been finding, maybe a different type of approach as a mentor can be applied as many current way of dealing with helping people.

    Many people confuse with the difference between (Guide and Advise) and this can become a problem to anyone receiving a way to make up their minds to come up with a solution to any situation.

    Let the mentor take the back seat and help the subject decide own way what action to achieve the desired result, by make sure that will point out any negative points that might let the subject fall into a pit of no return. But the final result must always be from the subject to resolve their uncomfortable situation that needed some type of help by a mentor help the subject think in a sensible reason in first place.

    I know and I have heard that many mentors like to give advice on various points regarding the next person events and situations without realizing that, the mentor seldom if ever know the situation at all for what it is. That is why I feel that is so undesirable for anyone tried and gives an advice or suggestion how to go about in any situation. Rather let the subject decides in own mind and terms the correct way to come to a compromise or final decision, what to do or achieve for their situation in a satisfactory final point.

    Well Marie I am looking forward for the next video. Till next time, let me close for now, because these interesting subjects can be discussed for hours.

  215. Amy

    Hi Marie!

    This was an interesting watch for me and the first time that I don’t entirely ageee with you. I have a mentor and didn’t find it awkward or weird to ask as I had already worked to establish a base relationship with my mentor before I asked. I own an interior design business and while I consistently look to and learn from many sources (Jack Canfield, Tony Robbins, you, etc), I also wanted to learn from someone who’s built a successful business doing what I do. My mentor is in my city and all I asked for was one phone call a month, no longer than 15 minutes and I send ahead the question(s) I want to ask her. It is my responsibility to set up the call and to make sure we don’t go too long, out of respect for her, and it’s been amazing! I am able to ask a seasoned and successful fellow business owner who’s about 7 years ahead of me questions on problems I am directly facing.

    I would suggest that if you own a business (and even if you don’t), if you want a mentor – GO OUT AND FIND ONE!! The universe rewards those who take action and are willing to learn.

    Thank you so much for all YOUR wisdom and mentorship, Marie! I love receiving a morning download from you before I step into my day ❤️

    • Caroline - Team Forleo

      Amy, thank you so much for sharing your thoughts and experience. Your mentor sounds wonderful, and it’s terrific that you were able to connect with her in such a meaningful way.

      Finding a mentor like this can be a great resource for so many people, though as Marie shared, there are also ways to learn from people even if you never meet them! It’s all about finding what works the best for you.

      Thanks so much for tuning in, and we so appreciate you sharing your thoughts!

  216. I started doing that, finding all kinds of free content online. I admit sometimes I felt overwhelmed, but I learned a lot and could grow my business. Then, I got to a point I feel cannot grow anymore, so I decided to register for a coaching program and I think this will be great at this point. I also think that I’m getting clearer and clearer each new day about what I really want with my business, so the coaching will be good to help me find the direction and go for it, that’s my expectation. Thanks for sharing your knowledge, Marie… I love your videos.

    • Mandy - Team Forleo

      That’s really smart, Dani! Free online resources are great when you’re first starting out, but there comes a time when you need one-on-one advice tailored to your situation. Congrats on taking such a big, important step! 🙂

  217. Thanks for your video! I’ve been feeling in need of a mentor and no idea how to find one. You let me know that I actually already have many — in the form of all the gurus I follow on Facebook in the world of health and nutrition. So thank you! I do think I still need someone to help mentor me in starting the business but I have faith it will come!

  218. Kiran Shahzadi

    Hi this is Kiran !
    Am a pre-medical student, I’m actually done with my FSc but am gonna repeat it , I didn’t do better in my Entry Test also known as MCAT, because I wasn’t devoted towards becoming a doctor, But my family has a strong desire to see me becoming a doc, I have no interest in this particular field, I have interest in sort of things like , mechanical engineering , telecommunication engineering, software engineering etc and at the same moment I also wanna have authority to do something for the betterment of the infrastructure of my city and have a strong desire to have a lot of money to help the needy to my maximum potentials so for that I should do LLB,
    From all this you may have gotten the idea that I’m not even sure that which field best suits me so its the problem no #1

    Prob #2 is that if I choose anything except MBBS, there will be nobody to stand by my side in this idea

    Prob #3 My mother says “You have boys-like thoughts , she says whatever you think is what our religion Islam doesn’t allow, (according to which a woman should stay at her home to look-after her husband n children), but if she wants to do a job, the only jobs suitable for her is teacher or a doctor, so these kinda beliefs bound me n its not possible for me to go against everything n every person around me. So the religious beliefs bound me.

    Prob #4 In my country parents don’t let their daughters travel alone, they need some “MEHREM” to travel with them in order to keep them protected, My father is in his 70s and is a diabetic, he can’t travel with me a lot, so I can’t consult a
    Councillor to guide me or to attend any seminars, or visit some universities so that I can be sure of what program could be good for me.

    Prob#5 The universities in Pakistan are not good, They donot put things in practice and unfortunately in top 500 ranked universities of the world theres no uni of Pak, I have no resources to apply for study abroad + my parents won’t send me ?

    Prob#6 My parents say that if you even graduate in your desired fields , you would have to job amongst boys, so that’s too not acceptable to them.

    Prob#7 According to Anthony Robbins, find the ideals and do what they did, but to do so I only have internet n I don’t find any ideal in Pak through it

    I’m just totally screwed up, if I want to go with my desired subjects, I would have to do additional maths of both 1st year and 2nd year, so I’ve gotta decide in no time,,

    I would really appreciate if you state your thoughts about it. PLEASE

  219. Nice article. Maybe this time i ‘ll find my mentor.

  220. Lana Marie Hyatt

    In June I quit a job that was just not a fit for me any more and Iwas struggling with finding what my lifes direction should be. ( multi passionate right here lol!) When I felt lost, upset or stressed your shows pulled me up from the mental hole I was digging. I wanted to thank you for you being you! You are such a inspiration. I’m getting there … I now have a day job to help with the bills and currently working on making my first cook book with dreams of a cooking channel or show to boot!

  221. Bill Bryant

    Right, exactly! This and your post on gratitude are for me exactly the right message at the right time!
    Perspective is key so if you’re getting mentoring from many then you’re getting several perspectives and you no longer need a “in person” mentor.
    I am grateful for you! Thank you!

  222. So much YES to this – thank you Marie & Team Forleo!

    Until recently, the idea of “needing” a mentor never resonated with me. I wanted to be a leader, and (while I don’t think I’ve ever verbalized this), thought that having a mentor meant I couldn’t do it all myself. It felt like a sign of weakness.

    In recent years, I’ve softened in to realizing that openly learning from those you admire is a sign of strength, intelligence and wisdom, and have become a loyal consumer of the messages that are being so enthusiastically shared by amazing humans, just like Marie.

    With that came a desire to find MY mentor, and as I started putting that out in to the universe, it continued to feel off, but for different reasons. Like Marie, I find so much inspiration and wisdom in SO many people and places – Ms. Forleo herself and other big names like her, but also in fellow entrepreneurs I’ve never met, in my best friends, in my husband, in nature. The key is to open your eyes and heart to all that is around you – chances are you’ve surrounded yourself with exactly what you need.

  223. I just wanted to thank you, I have been watching MarieTV for a while now and all the information presented is so very valuable. I especially liked this one because I have been struggling with this very topic and your steps and suggestions really resonated with me. Thank you.

  224. Fouad A. Al Zomr

    Not hypocrisy At All Marie Forleo.
    You are Best of the Best.
    I guessing your MOM was BEE to produce All This Honey … <3.

  225. Rita

    Hi, am Rita.. from across the atlantic!. Just found marieforleo 2 days ago and right now, you are my role model and more importantly my mentor. I like writing and i talk alot, i have been having headache thinking of how to write a blog because, well i prefer to talk it out, then write a summary. Thank you for showing me that i can write and talk even more.

  226. Chad

    Great video.

    There were a couple of things I was thinking about while watching the video. As you mentioned, mentors are often busy people. One thing I have found effective is not asking for something (time, knowledge, etc.) without being able to give something in return. This means that I have to discover what they need that I can provide, and then provide it…without expecting them to reciprocate.

    The second was that if you want mentorship, hang out where the people who might be your mentors are. The more you are around other people who have been where you want to go, the easier it is to get inspired by them and be exposed to information that can make a real difference for you. You might call this “mentorship lite”.

  227. A few weeks ago, I was invited by my new lawyer I had just meet during a business meeting, to speak at an event with 3 other female panelists. She was organizing a cool evening around female entrepreneurs and was inspired by my story. She asked mepoint blank if I would be interested. At first, I said: It’s so outside my comfort zone, but I’ll do it. Without really thinking about it, it became one of the best decision I’ve made. Turns out, I became a mentor for some of the people who attended. They could relate to my story, and I even got a couple emails thanking me for all the advice. For me, it was a way to get out of my comfort zone, and I ended up helping a few women along the way. Mission accomplished.

  228. Sasha

    I really appreciate your perspective Marie. I personally would like a network of resources to guide, inspire, enlighten. I see mentorships as a super outdated mucho macho practice. I do think that I read somewhere ?!? 😉 that mentorships have shown to largely only contribute to the careers of men . Woman are different business creatures. But who knows, the worlds a blank canvas x

    • Caroline - Team Forleo

      Thank you so much for sharing your thoughts, Sasha! I think the model of one-to-one mentorship is a bit narrow and definitely not the best fit for everyone, so I totally hear you. I love the idea of networks of resources to inspire and enlighten – it’s a big part of why we love having amazing guests on MarieTV to share their perspectives too! Thanks for tuning in with us! 🙂

  229. Alexandra

    Hi Marie,
    Thank you for all that you do, I have been lucky enough to find online mentors like yourself that provide snippets of mentorship at no cost. At this particular time where I am raising 3 kids with a husband that travels every week for work, working on building my own business, and managing construction of a new home(all in a new country), things have not been very easy. Online mentors have been a godsend for me as well as a dear friend of mine that is always available to talk and listen to all my frustrations and anxieties, and magically calms me down. I love what you do , and am so grateful that you are FOR REAL!

    Thank you.

  230. Pat

    Your advice was excellent regarding finding mentor(s). I’m just starting out and I know you can’t do it alone. I’m excited to follow your six steps.

    Much respect!

  231. Tha

    Show up, be consistent, work hard! Thank you for sharing Marie & team Forleo?

  232. Maggie Brennan

    Great idea! I don’t even need to know my mentor personally! I can access their brilliance through their work, their speeches, their books or their online presence. I also loved the idea of consistent and valuable contributions online. I will do that.

    The only thing I still want a personal mentor for, is to be able to talk, chat, muse and brainstorm about my career path. That requires a relationship, knowledge of my industry and time. Until I find that, I will take your advice and become more active online with people I admire. Twitter has been a fantastic professional resource for me as well. Thanks Marie.

  233. Maria

    Hi Marie, really spot on. mentors don´t want to feel that you are druling them on a pedestal, they are human. they want to feel that you can give back and inspire them as well. So spot on to get into action manifest to be worthy of advice. also the best advice is active learner vs passive learner. start everyday looking for essays, radio interviews, articles, done by them and study their creative process using your insight , guts feeling, so you already rise up to their level of intelligence if you ever have the serendipity chance to meet them. don´t ask the obvious questions. do the homework that others have already done researching on them so you are dancing the steps to music beat. being humble with high self confidence.

  234. thank you for sharing with us this great article we love it and am going to share with my friend and family

  235. Deeva

    Thanks for the info!! I’ve had a difficult time trying to find a mentor myself! I don’t even know where to start! I’m still looking and I wrote notes down! If anyone knows Where I can find one can you comment?

    • Renee – Team Forleo

      Hi Deeva! We’re so delighted this video inspired you! Make sure to put all Marie’s tips into practice, and you’ll absolutely see beautiful results. Remember, a mentor doesn’t have to be in-person. Reading books, taking online courses, and following influential people you resonate with is a great way to gain wisdom.

      That said, make sure you’re getting out there in your community and networking! Here are a few ways to start searching for a mentor:

      • Go to conferences & events in your industry
      • Join relevant Facebook groups in your industry
      • Follow people you respect and interact with their community online (Instagram, Twitter, etc.)
      • Ask friends, classmates, colleagues, etc. for any leads on finding mentor

      You’ve got this! We’re cheering you on big time.

      PS – I removed your email address from your comment to keep it safe from spammers 🙂

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