Marie Forleo introduction

Hi!

I'm Marie

You have gifts to share with the world and my job is to help you get them out there.

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Finding the courage to express yourself isn’t always an easy thing to do.

While technology gives us countless tools to share our creations with the world, it also opens us up to the opinions of others: the good, the bad, and the cruel.

If mean words keep popping up in your mind, don’t let them drop down and poison your soul. Click To Tweet

To keep yourself open and continuously creating amidst the rocky terrain of online public opinion is a vital skill, especially when you’re committed to being a force for good.

That’s why I was intrigued when a reader asked how I **personally** deal with criticism online.

Rather than just empathize, I thought I’d share some fun “feedback” from my own critics. If nothing else, I hope it makes you laugh.

Look, not everyone’s going to like you (or me). That’s reality. Different strokes for different folks.

But if you want to create anything meaningful in this world, it’s important to develop your own winning strategy for handling criticism. Both tactically and emotionally.

Because it will happen. Some criticism will contain valuable insights for positive growth, and much of it will not.

As promised, here’s the link to the full Jimmy Kimmel Live video of “Mean Celebrity Tweets” we referenced.

Now, I’d love to hear from you.

How do you deal with criticism in your life?

Or are there any really priceless comments, tweets or shares that you’ve gotten that now make you laugh?

Let me know in the comments below.

Remember, share with as much love and compassion as you can. Thousands of incredible souls come here each week for insight and inspiration and your story may be just what someone else needs to hear.

As always, thank you so much for reading, watching and sharing here. Without you, there’d be no one to make our show for.

Our deepest gratitude for your continued support and participation.

With all my love,

XO

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459 comments

  1. “criticism comes with creativity” – As a singer, this is such a valuable reminder. I’ve been working on my 300 songs project for almost 2 years, and you can imagine the mix of reactions I get on my videos! It’s helpful to remember that I “own” my power and I don’t have to give it away.

    • Agreed. Any creative act is one that bares the soul and there’s no armor in that space. I think the bravest souls are the ones who are willing to be vulnerable and the most cowardly can only attempt to steal power from those who lower their shields. It’s really all an energy game and once that’s understood, we can protect our reserves despite our armor-less existence.

      • My spirit animal strikes again!! This entire comment is resonating so hard with me!!! Ugh… Just nailed it…

        • hehe Love you, Biba. 🙂

          • Hi Maria, I have been to shy to comment but I am popping my cherry!!! I admire your work love your energy…YAY sista. I have a Q&A for you which is around a similar topic. I have a friend who is in the same business as I am, he shows up at my events, workshops etc. On the outside he looks to be supporting, but it feels as if he is checking out the competition and I really don’t feel great when he is around. Is this me being paranoid? We both hang out in the same cycles and I often sit back in the shadows so I don’t offend him or feel as if I am surpassing him.

      • micki

        I love what you just said. That hits deep!

      • Sandy

        Oh wow that is deep and wise. And so true. Well said Emelia.

      • Simone

        Emelia nailed it. Beautifully, so. Thank you.
        Great advice from both you and Marie.
        🙂

      • So very well put, Emelia. My favorite quote regarding criticism; ” I am returning this otherwise good typing paper to you because someone has printed gibberish all over it and put your name at the top.” ~English professor at Ohio University, name unknown.
        P.S.~ I love your Brunette Locks, Marie. 😉

      • Arleen

        Emelia,you wrote it so elegantly and truthfully thank you.

      • Ans

        Great insight,thanx for making things so clear now I understand why I am so scared of creativity. I shall use your sentence somewhere whenever anyone is bullying any other person for their creativity.

      • I like this. People trying to steal my energy… I read once that when a conger eel eats a squid its measurable life energy goes up by the same amount that the squid has. So letting peoples’ criticism bother you is actually giving them energy…hmmm. love the site. I recently posted something on Facebook that I knew would be hugely unpopular as an opinion but it is MY opinion. I have had several hateful comments and I have decided to leave them up there as training for managing my personal power. It feels uncomfortable but I know I will prevail.

        • Well done Joshua! I have a pact with a friend that when I get my first ‘hater’ we are going to have a class of Moet together to celebrate! It made me feel less afraid to put myself out there knowing it is all part of playing a bigger game and by having a plan to acknowledge it in a positive way I can freely express myself. Having said that, it was back at the beginning of this year and I haven’t hit my ‘goal’ yet, so thank you for the reminder that I need to get back in the arena!!!

    • I also love that quote. I had a photography business for a while and my favorite things to do was creative conceptual fine art… a lot of “weird” pieces. Things people didn’t understand. And that’s okay because I didn’t always fully understand them either. It was just my creativity and imagination at play. Doesn’t always have to make rational sense.

      Anyway, I had people criticizing it every time I would do a showing. There would be that one or two people that would look confused and talk crap. But with it comes the people who really appreciate what you do and respect the creativity and the confusion is GOOD – becuase it makes them think.

      Always two sides. That’s why I also love the quote!

      • Such a great response!! I can definitely relate to this Kamila!

    • Thanks for reiterating that Lisa!

      “Criticism comes with creativity.” Perhaps my new mantra for a while. 🙂

    • So helpful! Thanks for the great advice and modeling exactly how to respond to criticism. It can definitely sting when people are cruel, but that’s also when you know you’ve made it. When people engage and respond to what you are doing they are a captive audience. You are an inspiration MF and I really appreciate all you do!

    • dzina

      I love Mari… Who ever criticises u is a jelious stupid person 🙂

      Greetings from Sarajevo Bosnia http://www.marieforleo.com/2014/10/criticism/#respond

    • One thing I have done recently is dropping “friends” who are energy vampires and nay sayer from my life. The ones that tell me I cant do something or only act jealous. Ive started to block their feeds and block their numbers from calling/texting me. I imagaine a big burly nightclub bouncer with a velvet rope guarding entry into my life. Only lovers and lovers with constructive feedback are allowed in my club.

      I dont really put myself out there enough. As a trainer I have been urged to post workouts so I do. As an adventure retreat coordinator I post nature pictures and quotes but never my own words. I started just writing what comes to my head super recently, just this week. My own words and not quotes. My thoughts and not workouts because I just felt like I was “supposed” to post workouts but I don’t actually get excited to do so.
      I haven’t gotten anything but positive feedback so far but it was scary to put out and I know eventually when you grow enough haters find a way to hate. This video and comments are good tools for me to remember that. Thanks again MF and community.

      • Good for you Sarah! I, too, have begun to blog about things that I never would have in the past because of the fear of criticism. I also went through the process, and still am, of dropping those “haters” in my life – thus the reason I now can find the strength to be my true self more and more everyday. After launching my business, I have found it even more important to stay strong and persistent, otherwise I know that I will fail – and failure in NOT an option!

        Confronting the naysayers is the hardest part (easy to block from technical avenues, not so easy in person). I have learned that a rebuttal with sharing my successes is usually the best way to make them walk away.

        Marie – you just rock, and I share your name and mission with every woman I meet because I think you are that great!

    • At this point I feel like my biggest criticism comes from myself!!! So the tweetable was actually applicable, but even still- how do you stop self criticism!!

    • Howard

      That may be true….but you may not be able to say the same thing about your song project……in that case……..if it isn’t very good; you may just end up having to give it away……..is that an example of some of the criticism you encounter??

  2. Love, love, love this.

    All the tips are great, but not giving up your power is the one that most strongly resonates. I’ve received some of the most harsh criticism this year than I’ve ever received in my life. Interestingly enough, the nastiest responses were to an article I wrote on dealing with “toxic” people. The irony of it…

    Anyway, one person took great offense to something I didn’t even say. She wrote me a long email designed to “put me back in my place.” The reason that one hurt so much was because she was merely echoing a thought that I already had about “my place.” See, the only criticism that really affects us is an affirmation of what we think to be true of ourselves.

    Now when I receive it, I’ve learned to take a deep breath (usually after I’ve mentally called them a *beepin’* beep…I digress.) However, when I regain my zen ;), I take a closer look at why it hurt me in the first place. It’s usually some inner work I have to address. This is how I regain my sense of power.

    • Oh, the irony indeed!!

      I’m so glad that you took back your power by turning inward to find out what is really going on and why the email stung you the way that it did. That is definitely the key!

    • Paula

      This is SO awesome! Thank you. You could not have answered this question better.

    • Ha! Toxic people lashing out it sounds like Emelia!

    • Love, love, love this Emelia 🙂 It’s so true and it takes a brave person to look within and do the work versus lash out back at them. Kudos to you lovely lady, keep being amazing xo

  3. Hey Marie! Loving the hair and the skirt is on point! I need chartreuse in my life, pronto!

    Great advice as always! What people think of me used to be so paralyzing for me. I don’t know if I’m getting older or the EFT is working in this area too, but I find myself having zero f**ks to give. I like the saying that other people’s opinion of me is none of my business. I like to add that their opinion is also not my problem. I am open to constructive criticism, but I don’t tolerate negativity just for the sake of being negative.

    Now, I just need to work more on my inner thoughts, because they can be pretty vicious at times! I’m learning ways to separate myself from these thoughts through being mindful, which has been pretty helpful. 🙂

    • Miranda

      yeah, I think we all have destructive thoughts sometimes, but it really pays to take care not to lose power to your own negativity too.
      I put it this way for myself the other day: It’s the golden rule to treat others as you would want them to treat you, and platinum is to treat yourself as you want others to treat to you (because when you know you’ve got your own back, it frees everything up and allows you to be kinder, more open, more engaged).

      • This is so very true, Miranda. Thank you for the reminder that it is important for me to treat MYSELF how I want others to treat me. 🙂

    • Ha! You are what I call “f***less.” So necessary. We have enough to deal with internally!

      • LOL! I swear that I need to turn that it a headband and rock it with a matching pair of leg warmers. No? Too much?? lol!

    • Elizabeth H.

      I’m in that same place Ms. Pillowz — I think getting rid of caring about external approval is a huge start, at least there is a lot less incoming “new crap” to add to the mix.

      I’m about to turn 61 and decided to pierce my nose for my birthday, I love tiny diamond nose studs. I am sure some people will have a judgment and find I could care less, it pleases me. A few years ago I would have done more polling and wondering.

      The inner thoughts take a long long time to tame for sure. I have found lovingkindness meditation to be so healing to myself and others, since it stars with self-care and self-love and radiates out. We are a gift to the world when we are feeling peace, joy, and self-acceptance and can shine that light on others

      • I love it, Elizabeth! Nose piercing are fab at any age. 🙂 Thanks and I will look into the lovingkindess meditation. Maybe I can find it on Youtube.

  4. Karo

    No one is 100% authentic online. We put the best idea of ourselves forward and it will appeal to some people. It’s so easy being a keyboard critic. I may not agree with the content put forth in Marie’s videos each week but I think she is a great example on how to create a business that offers value to many. Nothing wrong with that.

  5. The best way I have found to deal with negative voices in my head, whether they come from outside or from within, is to do The Work by Byron Katie.
    When I use it, whatever negative thoughts I have actually become an opportunity for opening and transformation.

  6. Once a Native American told me that my website was ‘”Too much ego for this Indian.” I would have laughed but I could see his point. I toned it down so it wouldn’t alienate anyone. I didn’t take it into my heart, because he didn’t know me or that we are on the same page much of the time. No worries. Great feedback!

  7. The QUEEN!

  8. THIS was one of my favorite episodes (and I love them all). I think we all need to hear about how to handle criticism and your advice was perfect. There are a lot of sad, jealous people out there, so the hair brush thing you had going on??! Classic!!

  9. Dear Marie,

    I love you. The right words at the right time.

    Your friend,
    Lisa

  10. Jo

    Sooooooo true With creativity comes criticism. Haters gonna hate, just shake it off, shake it off (Taylor Swift style). Got to keep going being positive and keeping your power. Had negative reviews left on my Facebook business page by someone who had never even been a customer. You can’t imagine why someone would do that just out of spite. But like you said they obviously have too much time on their hands. Shake it off, shake it off…..

  11. Taylor Swift knows best! Sometimes you just gotta “Shake it Off”
    <3

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nfWlot6h_JM

  12. Danica

    Thanks so much for this video. I’m extremely sensitive, which doesn’t help at work or at home but I love your attitude and advice in this video.

  13. Great video, Marie! I just got some pretty harsh criticism (but infinitely more applause) for a blog post I wrote that got picked up and reprinted by a regional publication (yay me! 🙂 The critics clearly missed the entire point of my blog, which is that I give WAY more of my resources to Boston U School of Social Work than I do to my undergrad alma mater, Colgate, bcs of the differences in the way each institution treats me as a donor. It was an allegorical lesson that was clearly lost on these 2 critics, who felt I was being egotistical and vain over what they consider to be an insignificant gift amount (um, I’ve left each University a gift in my will, I’m not sure how that gets construed as insignificant, but whatevs…). While my initial instinct was to reply and explain, in the hopes that they’d “get” it, I realized they didn’t WANT to get it, shrugged my shoulders, and moved on w/my life. I have no doubt I will encounter more “clownholes” as I move out onto a larger and larger stage, but as you so eloquently put, there’s no way I’m gonna let ’em take a dump on my living room rug! 😉

  14. Marie,

    Well, this just proves that people have way too much time on their hands and clearly don’t “get it” if all they can be focused on is whether or not you have hair extensions! I mean really.

    There are a couple of quotes that come to mind that I’d like to share.

    1) It’s mind over matter, if you don’t mind, it doesn’t matter!

    2) This one was something my mom said to me while I was going through a very contentious divorce and letting off steam once.
    “Now Sally, I’ve never known you not to feel sorry for someone so much less fortunate than you!”

    I think that about says it all.

    And for the record, I love and adore you, with or without pants, with or without hair extensions, any old way you want to be!

    As they say here in Maryland, “You Go Girl!”

    Hugs,
    Sally

  15. Thank you for sharing your wisdom, especially on this tender topic. Public shaming has been my Achilles’ heel, but the divine call has moved from gentle whisper to fierce direction. It is time to trust my little tribe will be protected as I share my soul gifts in service of the world. Grateful to have companions on this journey. xo

    • Macey

      I learned about Public Shaming as I and others endured it from a very immature and temperamental Pastor. I learned that people who publicly shame, including some pastors, are cowardly, spoiled and insecure. They often have no wisdom and even less love for the followers they claim to,love. Public shaming is just their very immature way of dealing with people whose growing success they are jealous of or whose blessings they are angry about and this is their tool of choice to make them pay. It really says a lot about the true character of a person and ought to be a red flag to alert you not to follow such a shallow leader or allow them to influence you. After all, if they they truly cared about you and your welfare they would correct in love and in wisdom and not in vindictive shaming. You absolutely can not rely on them to have what’s best for you in mind. And if they don’t have what’s best for you in mind, NEXT! Keep going until you do find someone does.

  16. Hi Marie – love-love-love this one. As an onlinemarketing expert and a marketing mentor I once did a FB-ad that said: “Make 30.000 Euro in 30 days” (something that is perfectly doable for someone who is a few yrs in business and has as least a turnover of 50.000 Euros/year). One lady wrote on my page: “This is totally dubios”. I then offered her a free session on the phone to find that money in her business. She declined and said she would take a look at my website and would only come back if she doesn’t think it to be dubios. Do I have to say she never came back? It hurts me til today.

  17. OMG, this was one of the BEST and funniest episodes I have seen in a while. It made me LOL when you were criticized for not wearing pants. Hilarious! Anyway, thanks so much for this video, made my day!

  18. Thanks for the link to the Jimmy Kimmel video. Hate from haters slips right off with a laugh or two (and a “get the f*Qck out” – man, I’ve missed listening to that old “Delirious” album).

  19. Not only do I love your videos, but this one hit home! I’ve shared your videos with my team and this one is no exception. Dealing with criticism is hard to do. Your humor gives it life!

  20. This entire video was obviously a screen to allow you to show off your voluminous REAL locks. Haha just kidding. I love your humor 🙂

  21. Marie, I just love you.

    The way you wrap valuable lessons and key points with material that literally made me laugh out loud four times this episode, that’s a true talent.

    Thank you for making my Tuesday morning a wee bit brighter!

  22. Great message Marie… thank you!!…and, I love your hair! 🙂

  23. This video is hilarious. It’s crazy because for the past 9 years my bf keeps telling me that in life and business. Don’t engage with people and give away my power. I always fly off the handle quickly because I’m so sensitive especially when I know I didn’t nothing wrong however he keeps reminding me that I should never give my power away. I can’t wait to show him this video. He’s going to say I told you so.

    Thanks Marie.

    Xoxo
    Ashley

    • Ashley – I have the same problem, and my husband is always telling me the same thing your bf tells you! I tend on the sensitive side too and definitely struggle with that part of my personality sometimes. Over the last year I’ve learned to place less value on others’ opinions, but I still have more to learn. Loved this video because I recently had someone close to me insult my jewelry business profusely. It tore me up for a few days, unfortunately. But I love the idea of not giving your power away + can’t wait to move towards that goal in the future!

      Andrea

  24. You had me in tears with this one!!
    Such great advice!!! AND GREAT HAIR!
    One of my mantras used to be ” I will not let anyone walk through my mind with their dirty feet ” ~ Gandhi
    After saying it when needed, I no longer needed to say it because I just would not let anyone wearing dirty shoes near my spirit. This was a great Q&A, especially in the “anonymous” digital world we live in.
    And I find most criticism really is projection. It has nothing to do with us.

    • Bridget – that Gandhi quote is one of my favorites. Thanks for sharing it here!

      • EDdie Herrera Jr.

        <3 🙂
        L O V E this!

    • Oooh! I haven’t heard that quote Bridget, and I really really love it. Thank-you!

    • Bridget, that Gandhi quote is GOLD! Thanks for sharing it here.
      I try to reframe criticism as ‘feedback’ when I feel reactive to it, which can help me take a second look at it for anything helpful.
      The thing that I tell myself is “Others opinions of me are none of my business.” The exception being when I solicited that opinion, in which case I’m all ears for their feedback and how it can help me improve.

  25. Stephanie

    Perfectly timed message. I work with people who seem to love to criticize. I try to listen for the message without the drama & put downs. Sometimes the negativity gets me down. Keeping my power! Thanks Marie 😀

  26. Paul

    My rule for criticism. If they aren’t going to be at or cry at my funeral then they don’t matter.

  27. Thank you, Marie, for yet another great episode! I am at the point of my life where I ignore unproductive criticism. I am still working on being grateful for receiving helpful advice as sometimes it can sound harsh but, boy, does it help listening to others, esp. when running your own business. In my case running ARTISURN (www.artisurn.com) exposed me to so many diverse audiences that I just try to keep an open mind and learn from others.

  28. Sony

    Marie, as always. Love you (and your hair)!
    Good one recently – someone called me Selfie Queen on FB – which is kind of ironic, because all week I’d been posting different redhaired actresses, trying get votes on a vintage hairdo for some event. (But I am admittedly a selfie queen, and I OWN it! I have a following that’s living vicariously through my misadventures, so feel an obligation to share – LOL)

  29. This video is an answer to my prayer: “Dear Universe, help me deal with my fear of criticism that has been blocking me from accomplishing my life mission”. So thank you Marie, this helps a lot. And, as a new Desire Map facilitator, I needed to hear that so that I can run fantastic workshops & soon open my Yoga & Pilates studio. Love, Mona

    • That is awesome you are a Desire Map facilitator! I got so excited when I heard Danielle was offering that and can’t wait to eventually go to a class or workshop to get into the mappin’ groove.

  30. Nailed it! Thanks

    • Carolyn Eastman

      Thanks for the insightful message Marie. Three pieces of advice
      my dad, mom and good friend Meghan gave me about this
      1-Never, ever put anything negative in writing (dad was an attorney) 2-Cream always rises to the top. (Meghan)
      3-Last from mom- A weak ego seeks to bolster itself by tearing down others.

      I try to keep these in mind when receiving criticism that is not well intentioned.
      Carolyn Eastman

  31. “Don’t give away your power” and “laugh it off” – two great pieces of advice. When I first started putting myself out there – by which I mean, into the online world with my own stuff, it felt very exposing and I sometimes worried about what people’s reactions would be to some of the things I said or did. But with time you become more confident in your own offerings and the value you provide and care less and less about what people might think.

    This doesn’t mean that it doesn’t hurt or make you mad – but that’s normally because someone’s misrepresenting you. Like the time someone wrote that my new program was the same old stuff about getting a happier life by getting more sleep – it was obvious that they’d never read any of it because I didn’t mention anything about sleep – ever! It made me mad as others wouldn’t know that but then I had to let it go by thinking it said a lot more about their feelings towards self-improvement and self-worth than it did about my work (which they didn’t know anything about). So developing a thick skin and philosophical approach also helps!

  32. Criticism is a right of passage. If you’re not getting any then you need to get out there more! It always says more about the person than it does you, so don’t sweat the small stuff and hold your boundaries.

    By the way I love your skirt Maire, even if it is shifty.

    Big love,

    Phoebe xx

    • Kinda wish I had proofread my own post (BEFORE hitting the comment button)! Cue criticism for not typing your name right. Ha.

    • Rod Miller

      Tend to agree. However, my experience as the head of a very small government agency is that if it gets too difficulty trying to make positive change within a storm of negativity then the world is tell one something. Find a more productive path.

  33. What a lovely blog! After visisiting my coach today where I talked about my HUGE dreams… She let me talk about it. And it felt weird, cool, exciting to explore my dreams even further, deeper! But also it scared me like hell.
    And then this video blog of you, Marie, was there in my inbox. I love it! Thank you, I know I’m on the rigt path…

    xo
    Hanneke

  34. This might sound weird, but I actually got a little excited when I received my first criticism. I haven’t had an online presence for very long (about seven months now). Receiving my first piece of criticism from a stranger on the internet almost felt like a right of passage in my business! Haha!

  35. Best video EVVAAAAA! Shake that mane baby! 🙂 xx

  36. LOVE “Clown-holes”. That may be my favorite thing about today.

    Also, Greg brushing your hair – that’s hilarious! Love it, Marie!

    I was once called “The Devil” by a reader over at The Bangor Daily News. She literal said “She’s the devil and this is the work of Satan” And so I responded with “Hey look at me, I’m the DEVIL” with my cute little blondie avatar pic next to it.

    Ah, to be a psychic.

    Thanks, Marie – this was such a good video!
    xoxo
    Licia

  37. Donna

    I have to giggle – you call them clown holes, I call them douche nozzles!
    Never let them steal your sparkle baby – YOU ROCK!!!

  38. Tal

    I had to watch this video twice: first for the message, then a second time to check out that beautiful clothing and accessories! Marie, I love your style! I’d love to know where you pick up such gorgeous finds!

    When I think about the question of criticism, I realize I lately haven’t had any because I’ve been hiding away, so this has been a big AHA moment for me this morning. There was a time a few years back when I was actively working in my field and pressing for changes, and that is when I got the most criticism. At the time, I felt hurt that people weren’t supportive of what I wanted to share and say, and because of my low self esteem it drove me further into my own shell. Watching this video just made me realize that rather than drive me away, I should use criticism as a gauge to see if what I’m doing is out there and if what I’m doing matters. If it isn’t rustling any feathers, then I don’t think we’re doing it right!

    I also love your idea of the ministry of kindness. I have done this throughout my life – I am always actively assessing the people in my life, and if the kindness just isn’t there and all they do is make me feel worse than happy, they are cut out of my life. This doesn’t mean I cut out pessimistic and keep only positive, bubbly people around me. It boils down to whether we are supporting each other or bringing each other down. I think with criticism, if you know deep down it’s helping you, then you appreciate it. If it’s just mean, it’s about them and not you.

  39. Marie, this is brilliant! I recently launched a very successful free 3 video campaign and the comments we got on the FB ads were ludicrous and so funny. Luckily I’ve been doing this for 5 years and like you, can laugh at them now. My “favorite” comment on one of the Facebook Ads was “So you’re a scam artist… or a high class Whore?” LOL
    Years ago that would have destroyed me but I laughed so hard when I saw that this time. And as you said, my heart kind of breaks for the people who leave comments like that, b/c they must be in so much pain to write stuff like that. So I send them love and block as need be. So glad you talked about this <3 xo

  40. Thanks for this! perfect timing 🙂
    I sometimes spend too much time worrying about criticism 🙁

  41. I just had this happen. Your video resonates with me, particularly the point about not giving anyone your personal power.

  42. I used to care SO MUCH about what people thought of me. I’d find it terrifying to put myself out there, to talk about what I wanted to talk about and do what I wanted to do without worrying what the haters or trolls would appear to say. I’ve had my fair share over the years and it made me so scared to do anything else in case it got worse.

    But then about 6 months ago – and it was actually after I joined B-School and got to know so many of the wonderful community there – that I realised…you know what? WHY do I care what these people think? And once I realised that I had that power to ignore them and rise above their crude attempts to bring me or others down, my life turned around. Anybody who has anything worth saying to you will say it constructively – if somebody’s goal is to hurt you or upset you then they’re never worth listening to.

    I love all of the tips you mentioned, Marie, but most of all I’m so glad you talked about keeping hold of your power. Nobody has control over that – only yourself – and we should be putting that power to good use, rather than wasting time worrying about what others think of us. Thank you for the reminder 🙂

  43. Thank you for another awesome episode. Just needed it today because a subscriber wrote something about if I don´t stop sending him emails he wants 100 $ from me. Well, in the end he subscribed. I wrote him back that he should scroll down to the bottom and hit the unsubscribe button and I wish him a wonderful future.

    Anyways. If people decide they don´t want to hear and read this “meaningless” stuff then they shouldn´t subscribe. 🙂

    Maybe it is meaningless to this person but I am sure there are people out there who are just looking exactly for this “meaningless” stuff. I you can only help one person it makes me happy.

    Thanks for sharing your tips, Marie. Exactly what we needed to hear today.

    Christina

  44. Loved this video! I had one email from a new subscriber who sent me a vitriolic email and she told me she “gagged” when she read a (very short) poem I had written that was in one of my autoresponders. It was such a hostile email! The image of her gagging created in my mind’s eye is amusing, though. 🙂

    ~Bonita

  45. Melissa

    Hey Marie & Team! I really appreciate this video especially the advice about not giving your power away. Over the last couple of years, my life has completely fallen apart and the criticism and judgments from those around me have been swift and harsh. I took back my power by cutting EVERY SINGLE one of them out of my life. It’s their problem and their opinion. Doing my best to shake it off and come back even stronger.

  46. Rick Ward

    Hi Marie, thank you for doing this video. You made a number of good points in this, that I feel will be very helpful to a number of us, including myself. I am not “in the public” like you, but I have had my share of put down comments, and it can be tough dealing with them. By the way, Marie, I Love You so much, I think You are awesome, and I really like your long hair, it always looks so nice. You have a fantastic day Marie with all my Love Joy and many Blessings for You, with a big Hug.

  47. Hi Marie!

    I learned awhile ago that people’s criticisms and opinions of me and my what I’m doing in life/biz means nothing. There will always be people who have nothing else to do but mock and talk trash about others because it makes them feel good in an attempt to bring them down to their level. The secret is to not allow this to affect you in anyway.

    The more successful you become, the more prominent this becomes in your life. It’s part of the game 🙂

    Now, I will say that constructive criticism is a different animal especially from your business partners, spouse, significant other, etc are important. I’m open to that of course. Same goes for their opinions. If we are so closed minded that we shutdown all criticisms and opinions, our chances of “success” is very minimal.

    Love your work!
    William

  48. Ramdesh

    Once someone emailed me…several times…to tell me I was going to be reincarnated as a cockroach for daring to teach Kundalini yoga online. Giggle.

  49. I so loved this episode! For the longest time I allowed criticism and just plain old negativity to get me down and stop me from being successful. But I stopped and realized that anyone that has any measure of success has dealt with the same thing and pushed through it. So now I tell myself when someone has any criticism or negative things to say, “I must be doing something right!” And since I’ve realized that my success has been growing in leaps and bounds. Another thing I realized is that criticism can, in some instances, be a form of jealousy. So when someone says something critical to me I take that as they might see something in me that they don’t have and would like for themselves, that just gives me the power to push onward. Again, I must be doing something right.

  50. Marie, thank you for the laughs this morning! People can be so obnoxious…. but rather than let them get to me, I do what you do too, feel bad for them. They are likely miserable, unhappy people that are just trying to take it out on whoever they can.

    Now, I did always wonder if you wore extensions or not because your hair is absolutely amazing! 🙂 that is awesome it’s all natural, you are awesome. Thank you for all that you do.

  51. Oh, Marie you are so right. And I think this video is actually my favorite, which is saying a lot because I love all of your videos. I’ve been putting my books up for sale on Amazon for about a year and a half now and I’ve dealt with all different types of criticism. Some people are like, ‘this is one of the best books ever.’ And others are like, ‘WTF is this Sh*t?!’ It truly runs the gamut and sometimes I’ve found things in very negative reviews that I’ve been able to use. Sometimes not. I think this video is a must see for anyone who does anything creative, especially those of us in a field where people are invited to leave official comments where our art is sold.

    PS, I’ve always been jealous of your hair. Never cared if it was real or not and if I could get my hair to look like yours I would, by any means necessary! Keep on keepin’ on with your awesome videos and awesome hair. I love you! 🙂

  52. Jan

    Great video Marie! This definitely speaks to me 🙂 love the tips ESP about not giving power. I typically stick out like a sore thumb in any group because despite being involved, I always somehow deviate to make what I do “mine”. For example, I believe that it is very possible to be athletic and smart at the same time. Got mean comments in my pics for having muscles. And about not being “smart” for liking being active and energetic. Well there is an option to delete and I delete away. It’s my page and why not right? Anyways, thanks for the reminder to tell people if you don’t like me, just get the f**** out of my house. I have so much stuff to do, unless it’s constructive, leave.

  53. Thank you, Marie, for another awesome episode. For me dealing with criticism is easy now, I’ve ignored (most of) it for so many years now that it’s not really real for me any more.

    I will always accept real, useful feedback, but there are so few people out there who know how to deliver it… Most of them only do personal attacks. And I do exactly what you said. I don’t let myself be affected by someone else having a “good time” trying to ruin my work.

    This strategy has worked for me since I was in general high, so that’s about ten years. I encourage anyone reading these words to do it. Once you see the difference between a personal attack and actual feedback, you’ll enjoy your work and your real friends so much more!

  54. Paige

    Oh my gosh! I busted into laughter with the hair bit. I love it & love your hair-gorgeous!

  55. Elisa

    Marie, there is no way how anybody would not like you. I simply love every episode, you’re such an inspiration!

  56. Hahaha ! Marie, this one was so funny ! Is it your real boobs two ?!!!
    You nailed it : self-mockery and humour are the best weapons for EVERYTHING !

  57. The best way to deal with criticism is to notice any reactivity or emotional charge you experience. Then look within to see where you are judging or criticizing yourself. It does not sting if there is zero self judgment. Try it!

  58. Rose

    Hilarious! I’ve received my share of criticism in the past but, quite frankly, I can’t remember a single one that stayed in my head. That’s the beauty of knowing who you are and not allowing others to take that away. A gold nugget I give to my team….don’t take the advice of someone you wouldn’t trade places with.

  59. Years ago, after the Four Agreements came out which states “it’s not about you”, my minister, Toni LaMotta shared a spin on that and said…”it’s always only about you” AND “it’s never about you”…at the same time.

    I took that to mean, that if I get upset by something someone said, that part belongs to me, and I’m the only one who can deal with whatever is still attached to some “meaning” (identity). This is an opportunity to examine and heal what’s still hurting in me (kindness required).

    And none of it’s about me, meaning whatever was said is something that is going on in that other person. Once I’ve heal what’s in me, then I can have compassion for whatever is “up” for the other person and send a blessing of light and energy that they may use to heal for themselves is they so desire.

  60. Marie, you are freaking amazing!! Love this video, bloody brilliant and so real. Looking fab and on point as always lady. 🙂 This is MY HOUSE! 😀

  61. This video and almost all the comments are so rich, so many from people who are well ahead of where I am business-wise but who I can tell have “been there”. Like some others have mentioned, I have been holding myself back from expanding my creative practices for the fear that I MIGHT receive criticism. It seems laughable but it must be pretty common since you address it in your first point, right? Trying to grow that thicker skin, acknowledging that I WILL get criticism if I am creating stuff for public consumption. Alrighty, buckling up, here we go!

  62. Marie, I just wanted to tell you that you’ve made such an impact in my life & always inspire me to grow both in my business & personally. So, thank you.
    P.S. I’ve never seen the Jimmy Kimmel mean tweets segment, thanks for making me (almost) pee my pants. H.I.L.A.R.I.O.U.S!

  63. BRAVO!!! Deep thanks for this insightful, powerful and truthful episode Magnificent Marie. I love your authenticity, honesty and glorious sense of humor (specially when you’re rocking your divine real hair). I believe nobody can make us feel less than we deserve without our permission. I no longer play the people pleasing game. I lost count of how many times I gave my power away because I was looking for approval outside of myself. When I began to take responsibility for my well-being, put myself first and say no to all the things that drain my energy: My whole life shifted. As Maya Angelou said: once you know better, you do better. Criticism can only affect those who takes things personally (The Four Agreements). Nothing can touch you when you’re aware that your self-worth doesn’t come from external validation but from a deep loving relationship with yourself. Keep speaking your truth and being your awesome self. Big hug! Love ya woman 🙂

  64. Gina

    Marie, you’re right about humour being the remedy.

    For example, my own blog doesn’t get enough traffic to attract trolls, I guess, but my comments on other peoples’ blogs always seem to, and some are really violent.

    My response is to pretend that it’s a joke, so I just reply:

    LOL!

    That usually shuts them up.

  65. I LOVE the hair reveal! As a custodian of big hair, I’m high-fiving you right now Marie x x

  66. FRIGGIN EPIC EPISODE!!!!!
    I am still laughing…on the floor…because I fell out of it…
    The best!
    Thanks Marie <3

  67. Elyse

    Maria, you are the best! I love watching your inspiring videos full of positivity and wisdom. And your hair is gorgeous! Criticism is just another form of separation. I can usually quickly realize ‘it’s not me; it’s them’ and let it go easily. Constructive criticism is done in a helpful way so it shouldn’t hurt (maybe the ego hurts a little!). Thank you for your fun spirit!

  68. That Aristotle quote is so true Marie, just as accurate today as when he said it/wrote it. I used to take everything personally ( being a Highly Sensitive person and creative) but one day I finally realized that most criticism has more to say about the person giving it than receiving it. I remember hearing Seth Godin talking about why he turned off his comments on the blog and he said basically what Eddie Murphy said.

    Those comments that you read were SO off topic and flat out rude by whoever said them. You are brave for reading them and have gorgeous hair! Glad you don’t take any of the randomly troll like negativity on the web seriously.

  69. Great advice Marie! It’s important to know that the higher you climb, the more of a target you become. It’s also a good reminder, that as necessary, to wield your three powers: delete, block and unsubscribe.

  70. This episode on your TV just came, like I’d ordered it!

    As a professional translator for the wine business I started a sommelier school this year to immerse into knowledge and business even more, so I posted a video on my FB site to share, how to open a bottle of wine.

    The comments that came…gosh! (I don’t think, I was bad, but doing a selfie-video with your phone makes noises so loud, people almost can hear your heart beating.)

    Thank you for your message, believe it or not, it is already important to me to know, I am not the only one struggling with followers, who just can’t stand leaving negative comments! <3

  71. Susan

    No matter what the topic, there are always those that are negative. Once you learn that you can learn to just ignore them. They have their own issues and will complain about everything.

    I have found that most negative comments aimed in my direction have just spurred me on further.

    Love your stuff Marie!!

  72. Thank you for making me laugh out loud this morning!!!!! And for your great advice!

  73. Love all of the episodes! Today, this one was exactly what I needed to hear. Great message and I find myself trying to please everyone and keep the peace for the sake of my business image. Sadly, that is completely impossible. One of my favorite quotes
    …“You can be the ripest, juiciest peach in the world, and there’s still going to be somebody who hates peaches.”.

    Thanks for inspiring all of us to be ourselves.

  74. Love your “M. ” addition on the bottom right corner of screen…

    Great episode. So important to accept that one’s worth is not defined by someone else or someone else’s inability to relate , enjoy, etc..

    And indeed it is poisonous to keep that in one’s veins or brain..

  75. Marie! This episode was amazing and made me laugh out loud. Love the the quote from Aristotle “to avoid criticism, say nothing, do nothing, be nothing” . A great reminder that you cannot, and should never try to please everyone!

    • But at the same time, Natalie, when we do nothing, say nothing we are also criticized for it! 🙂 no happy medium except minding our own business

  76. I’m guessing i don’t write enough about controversial things because so far i got no criticism … in the occasional comments. I need to get better 😉

  77. I LOVE this video! And great hair by the way. 🙂 I especially loved when you said, “Don’t give up your power.” That’s so important. I don’t think any of likes criticism, but I am a believer that you can almost always squeeze something positive out of what people say . . . unless it’s just a straight put down. Keep up the great work Marie!

  78. Time heals all wounds. If someone says something mean or embarrassing about or to me they are just trying to make themselves feel better for the moment and then are thinking about the next person they want to bring down or their own problems. I find it is always best to react graciously and then move on.

    • Dawn, nicely put. React graciously and then move on.

  79. Johan

    Oh Marie you have such beautifull genuine shiny hair and dont let anybody tell you otherwise………..great program as usual, take care and stay gold , Johan.

  80. Ooh! Ooh! I’m holding up my hand so hard that I have to put my other hand on my elbow to keep it so high!
    When I got my first ‘constructive criticism’ from a viewer of my videos, I decided to style it out by using it as my Facebook cover photo for a while (no name was shown). I guess that was my version of a celebrity reading their own trolls’ tweets, right?! It read:

    “Hello. I just today found your Life After Bread website. My suggestion is that you get a new photo of yourself, after you get a good haircut. It will definitely help your image. Straggly hair? Not impressive.
    Your ideas for using juicer pulp are excellent. Keep up the good work.”

    I particularly enjoyed the compliment there at the end…

    • Andrea, I had the exact same thing happen to me and it weirdly stung a lot? — “Thanks for the video. You really need a makeover” was the gist of the comment. LOL. I definitely think we as women seem like open season for those kinds of comments. In the end I decided that customers and clients who gel with me — my lifers — wouldn’t care if I occasionally had split ends and peeling nail polish 🙂 xo Fel

  81. Such an important message! You hit on my favorite word: Kindness.

    My mother always used to say “If you can’t say something nice, don’t say anything.” That doesn’t mean you have to be a Pollyanna, but what it means to me – and I practice this – is that anything you have to say that has true value, can be said NICELY.. with kindness. If your message is truly meant to help, there is no reason to be rude.

    For those who can’t be kind, I am in total agreement: DELETE!!

    Marie – you come across as totally yourself and I love watching you. Thanks for sharing yourself with us… keep going!!

  82. I think constructive criticism can be a great and welcomed thing. When people have legitimate complaints, that’s a whole other issue and something you can work with and use to grow as a person. But when people cyber bully someone just because they have a different opinion or are jealous of someone else’s success, well, that’s not useful to anyone.

  83. Love this! Yes – it’s so much easier to brush it off when you remind yourself that most often – the harsh comments stem from the commenters’ own insecurities. Maybe they’re just having a bad day – but whatever the case – it’s something inside of them that they aren’t happy with that manifests as hurtful comments to others.

    Thing is – ya ain’t gonna find joy by trying to steal it from somebody else!
    (There’s a tweetable for ya, right?) 😉

    I cover quite a bit about the judgement of others in a shared-post (includes a story from a guest-writer) that relates it back to taking a stand for ourselves and creating healthy boundaries – all intertwined.
    Feel free to check that out (link below) if you like. (Thrilled to share!)

    *PS: It includes a link to a FAB SONG for shaking it off!!*
    If you go download the song, it also supports a good cause! (I have no affiliation… Just happy to spread the word.)

    Please do – CHECK IT OUT! And “Let ’em Say” what they gonna say…
    http://thevitalitylounge.com/2014/10/obligations-expectations-and-other-boa-constrictors/

  84. I feel that some negative comments from people and even family closest to me seem to be driven by jealousy. I am following my dream, and they are not following theirs. I feel really sorry they have the same block about success that I had for so many years, so I really can not take it too personally. It also seems that many put downs are really people feeling their own inadequacies, they are hurting and they want company.

  85. jacob ouma

    I like the topic and have learned a lot, criticism is part of our life that’s people will always blame you in anything you trying to do.It has happened to me several times and i was thinking of not doing anything now but because i have watched this program-me am no gonna sit back and watch but to continue with whatever have started and move on thanks to Mario TV show for the great work you are doing.

  86. Yes! That’s what’s up! Such an important topic for all creatives.
    I found myself covering this topic recently with art students that are in their early twenties just starting out.

    One of the most important things I learned in art school was if you can’t stand behind your work nobody is going to do it for you.

    Xoxo. JML

  87. Marie (and community!) –

    This is my first time commenting! Marie, I’ve been watching your videos for about a year now and I want to thank you for being such a baller G. Those who comment, I can’t thank you guys enough for the inspiration that I’ve, until now, been silently absorbing 🙂

    This criticism video resonated on a super deep level for me. Recently my YouTube channel (where I post singing tips videos) had a bit of a tipping point and an influx of views and subscribers. With that came ridiculous amounts of rather insane comments. So I had a bit of a crisis in learning how to deal with it. I want to stay connected, but I don’t want to read through lines and lines of people calling me names. Your video summarized a multi-pronged approach perfectly: right now I’m trying to maintain a healthy mix of “skimming the top” for constructive comments, responding to YouTube subscribers who are actually interested in learning to sing and develop their voices, and then straight-up blocking people who cross the line. I also instituted an auto-flag feature where you can automatically take down comments if they contain red-flag words (that you can customize — just FYI for any of you on YouTube).

    It’s particularly interesting to learn how so much of harsh and bitter criticism is basically independent of the thing being criticized (in this case, Marie’s hair extensions, or my singing videos), but rather a reflection of a person’s insecurities and pain.

    Anyway, thank you to Marie and her awesome community for a year of support, and I plan to chime in more from now on. 🙂

    xo Fel

    • So glad to have read this comment, Felicia! I am now one of your new subscribers! Love your content.

      And I love all the videos posted on Marie TV! Thanks for giving such wonderful and entertaining information. I can count on feeling a boost every Tuesday!

      Marilyn

      • Marilyn! Hey, thanks so much!! Glad the videos click with you 🙂
        xo Fel

  88. You rock that hair, Forleo! (For goodness sake, people really *don’t* have anything better to do.)

  89. Unfortunately that’s the price you pay when you’re too fabulous in every way and it’s there for the whole world to see. Marie you’re gorgeous, whip smart, thin, very successful and have great full bodyluxious hair. Some people simply can’t stand it, it pushes their yucky green envy buttons which makes those nasty untrue comments spring, fake hair? LOL, they must have hair envy!

    To me they’re yelling: “Hey, stop shinning so bright is hurting my eyes and all of me.”

    Kind of sad that people, fortunately a small amount take this sad nasty route instead of being inspired.

    When criticism is nasty is always coming from a yucky sick place, that has to do with the person issuing the projectile vomiting and nothing to do with the target so I clean myself up and try to go on my marry way I do admit it’s not always easy, I keep trying to figure out why some people suffer so much through other’s gifts it really disturbs me a bit.

    When criticism is “well intended” by people who don’t know me at all and try to look “smart” by analyzing all of the full dimensional moi by a tiny thing I post online. I tend to answer back, since I believe these are clueless people, so I educate them a bit 😉 perhaps a waste of time, perhaps not.

    Great video and hair like always! Keep shinning your bright light you inspire and guide a lot of people! XOXO

  90. Carolyn Castro-Donlan

    Totally agree and loved this segment. Can’t believe people doubted your hair — beautiful head of hair! Those statements definitely came from the green side. I appreciate your energy and if I didn’t then would unsubscribe. Stay positive and keep marching to your own beat!

  91. It’s kind of sad really. People who make these types of comments and judgements about others are really expressing their own lack of self-acceptance they have for themselves. In truth, their not happy people – but that doesn’t give them permission to be nasty to others.

    Set good boundaries, don’t take things personally, and do what you need to do in order to maintain your ‘bubble of positivity.’ <3

  92. Sandy

    That was a great message…loved it

  93. Amanda

    Until a few months ago, ANY criticism, even the constructive ones, I’d deal with them ALWAYS on a personal level. I’d cry over any mistake I’d do at my work, thinking it meant I was a bad person. Little by little, and with a little help from my therapist, I begin to realize that some criticism can be constructive, and do NOT mean to judge me as a whole.
    There’s a concept that my therapist (which is actually a holistic coach) taught me about: that each one of us was born with a “sacred space”, that has to be nurtured, so only those who deserve it can enter it. I think the Eddie Murphy video is a fine (and hilarious!) way of explaining it! LOL
    xoxo from Brazil, love you Marie <3

  94. Thank you for this.
    I’ve been struggling with putting myself out there as a professional since I’m in the very early stages of my career and don’t have much experience to show for. I’ve been trying to find ways to learn and gain experience without having to put myself out there. This post (including the very appropriate Aristotle quote) made me realize that if I want anything to show for, I need to have the guts to put myself out there and learn from it.
    Thank you for helping me find my courage.
    Feel free to check out my Facebook page (also in its early stages) where I share articles that I find relevant to today’s digital marketing/advertising landscape. I also have a twitter. Find me @ahuvatiyael

  95. Jen

    Oh my goodness you are seriously the best! That was one of my favourites episodes lol the hair section. Aristotle was so right ” if you want to avoid criticism, say nothing, do nothing, be nothing” thanks for the reminder

  96. Priscilla

    Great video! I love how much fun you had with an idea that can feel very ‘not fun’ when you’re experiencing it.

    Plus, it reminds me of the importance of sharing positive criticism, aka praise. 🙂

    Love!

  97. Marie, you are a goddess! These are all the points that I have been trying to tell my young friends that I am mentoring. You said it all so beautifully in less than ten minutes. Manifesting your dream is rewarding but it is also hard to walk that walk. It takes fortitude and gentleness to climb that mountain.
    Thank you,
    Susan

  98. Marie, your hair is AMAZING!!!
    Loved all the insight.

    When I get down by that kind of criticism, the bad feeling is usually followed right away by the obvious conclusion that someone spending their time and energy with that kind of stuff has too much time in their hands, which is another way to say they are LOST. They should enroll B-School and try to find a direction for their lives. I end up feeling worse for them then to myself and the whole thing just “poof”- dissipates in the air.

  99. As I launch something big and out of my comfort zone, this episode couldn’t have come at a better time… AND, so many LOL moments! 🙂 Thanks Marie!

  100. Oh this so resonates for all of us creatives!
    1. Most of the time, we have the sensitivity to criticism beaten out of us in design school. We sit through countless “critiques” of our work from day one. Marie, you are SO right! I am now trained to immediately hone in to any constructive piece I can glean. Discard the rest.
    2. Just because someone says you have purple hair (or extensions!) does not make it true! It is only true if you also believe it is true. My yogi refers to this as “allowing someone to steal your joy.”
    3. One of my favorite poets, Walt Whitman, says it like this: “Dismiss whatever insults your own soul/And your very flesh shall be a great poem.”
    Great episode!

  101. This one has to be one of my faves so far. So true. I admit I let things get to me and stop me from time to time. Plus the hair bit was HILARIOUS! Althought it Made me a little sad that now I can’t buy my own “Marie-flocks”. Bummer. 😉

  102. OMG!! I just adore you!! The response to the mean comments about your hair was FAN-freakin-tastic!! Keep shakin off those haters and sharing your amazing nuggets of knowledge with us. 🙂

  103. Hi Marie… I look forward to all your Marie TV episodes… you have been such a wise and positive influence in my life. My Italian grandmother (creative, freedom loving spitfire that she was) gave me this advice when I was 15 years old… “Rene… people are going to talk about you whether you are pretty or ugly, rich or poor, keep a clean house or not… so do exactly what you want to do and please yourself!”

  104. Victoria

    Hi Marie,

    Those negative comments about your appearance were just “brilliant”. Why does it even matter what kind of hair you have? Do they watch your video so they could look at y o u or to get some valuable advice and hear great content? Clearly, these are some fat, thin-haired humans who had to take time out of their busy life and send you something like that – pathetic. As for me – being sensitive to beauty and attractive people (am one of those ;)) I feel like I get even more value out of the content if the speaker is well groomed and has amazing hair and most importantly style. Carry on, my friend, I love this little TV, it is crystal clear that you genuinely want to see people succeed and rise 😉 🙂 All the best.

  105. Omg Marie, this is my favorite video from you in weeeeeks, and “clown hole” might be my favorite phrase of all time.

  106. marie dubois

    I’ve been watching your videos for a couple months now and I have to say I just love you! Your tips are always so positive and you are a beautiful person inside and out. I can’t help but smile and feel brighter every time I see your emails and videos. THANK YOU for being exactly who you are!

  107. You’re so gorgeous Marie (inside & out) and this message will soothe may sensitive Souls.

    To spreading the Love and letting go of (other people’s) crap!

    Namaste,
    XO

  108. I think a bit of criticism often oversteps the mark into bullying and harassment. I wrote a book about using Cognitive Behaviour Therapy to overcome bullying and nasty stuff online, but much of the advice in it applies to dealing with the nasty types of critics. It’s called Coping With Online Bullying: How to Handle Trolls, Bullies and Cyber-Stalkers, Retain Your Dignity & Stay Mentally Healthy Using Cognitive Therapy Techniques
    We ladies seem to lean towards low self esteem and we hide away rather than blow our own trumpets. We should mix with positive, upbuilding people and don’t give the haters the time of day. Thanks Marie for a great show!

  109. Marie, this is just a great video & post. I always thought you were a class act since I saw you on Oprah, and this confirms it. And you have beautiful hair!!!!

  110. I love to get feedback from customers: good and bad. The bad stuff, I read, consider, then shred. The good stuff, I read, consider and keep in my “Love book”. If I’m having a bad day, I pull out my “Love book” and remember all the positive energy that people choose to send my way. This always helps me to remember to forward my positive thoughts to others and be thankful for them.

  111. Hi Marie,

    I just love this! LOVE!

    I’m a brand new entrepreneur……my website will be up so soon, yay. And I have to say, it’s super intimidating putting yourself out there like that, and I find myself on this pendulum swing which goes from being super excited to being super intimidated.

    Anyways, this was an awesome post for the intimidating moments.
    Thanks 🙂

  112. It always amazes me what people come up with. It would NEVER occur to me to think that Marie’s hair is fake…These mean tweeters/commenters are truly thoughtless and lacking any class or taste. Such a waste of mental energy to think negatively of anyone. Marie, you are a superstar!

  113. Raz

    Dear Marie,
    After watching your ‘Do you let criticism stop you?’ video, I felt it important to point out how fabulous you and your videos are. I love watching your videos, not only because they are jammed pack with wise and ethically right minded material (which is so valuable) but also because you are creative, original and fun!. You are stunning, have fabulous style and are an empowered and empowering women. I can only hope that more women step into their power and are courageous enough to become who they are meant to be – luckily you are an example for us.
    During your video, I also recognise how important it is for people to take some time to voice their positive thoughts and grateful feelings to one another. Often we voice complaints and negative feelings more, whist the positive and grateful ones lie unspoken in others. I hope that we all can be more mindful and take the time to communicate feelings of gratitude in order to support the empowerment of all that’s good and true. I know I will once again start doing so, unfortunately the busy world and my life distracted me, however these small gestures are time-worthy.
    Many thanks for the good vibes you put out there and I wish they return thousand times over … and you keep shining *
    Love and gratitude,
    Raz

  114. This message is uplifting as my unsupportive family would criticize me if they ever find out I published a memoir of my life. They were never there for me since I was a child but that was another story in itself. I really don’t think if I will ever gain their approval if I did make it big or receive a pat on the back, “good job”. I don’t tell them my goal or dream or they will crash it down. I don’t think they will ever see the real me.

  115. Marie, when is the next enrollment for B-school?!

  116. Hi Marie!

    Thank you so much for posting this video! I co-run a community dance group with a couple of other dance instructors and we’ve had a student that is experiencing some medical issues, and confided in us about it. We were compassionate and listened/prayed for her. Well while interacting, with some other students, she came in late to dance one day and because there are so many students and so few of us instructors, we never got around to saying hi to her and later that night when I arrived home, I received THE MOST hateful text message from her criticizing us for not paying her attention. This happened a week ago and it was still tearing me up! and she showed up to the class and dance yesterday not even to dance, but to just spread negativity!

    I have really been letting this occupy to much of my energy, when all we’ve tried to do is be kind to this woman. Thank you for this video because it reminded me that you can’t please everyone! All we can do is be kind, and stay true to what it is that we are trying to create for ourselves and our community.

    Thanks for the great advice and all your wonderful videos! I love your videos, your energy, your style and your brilliance! Thanks for being such an inspiration and for being you! 🙂

  117. Vanessa

    Thank you so much, Marie. I actually rarely leave any comments, good or bad, but this episode is worth commending. The tweetable message you gave is a hard lesson I learned. Bouncing back from the cruel and unfair comments of others is not easy. A better approach is to guard your heart from the outset. You live and you learn, right?! Thanks for getting that point across so clearly and with lots of humor as usual. 🙂

  118. Dear Marie, I love how you deal with negative people in your world. Thank you for bringing a sense of humor to this touchy subject…especially for people who tend to be a bit sensitive to nasty comments. Cheers! 😉

  119. Love this episode. SO helpful, beautiful, and as always – entertaining.
    I found that as soon as I launched my business I got both praise and criticism. For me it’s always helpful to remind myself of the Four Agreements by Don Miguel Ruiz, esp. the one that says “Don’t take anything personally.” It implies that people ultimately always talk about themselves, especially in criticism.
    So, when they seem to be talking about your beautiful hair, Marie, what they’re really saying is: “I’d love to have such beautiful hair” (who wouldn’t?) and “If I wanted my hair to look like this I’d need 80% extensions.” They just didn’t find the right words.

  120. Alexis

    Marie, you always make me laugh and I just love you for that! This is the one that keeps me on an even keel:

    WHAT OTHER PEOPLE THINK OF ME IS NONE OF MY BUSINESS.

    What is my business is what I think of me and what I’m doing with what IS my business. The gratitude I feel every time someone tries to put me down is tremendous. I’m grateful to have seen their true colors and to know they have no place in my life. I’m grateful to get the warning shot early on so I don’t end up in a bloody battle later on down the road. I’m grateful I won’t be wasting my time on them. I’m trying to practice compassion so I have a little prayer I say for them. It goes like this (and I actually say these prayers): “I love you _______________. I judge you not but you don’t belong here.” I loved your Eddie clip! I think I’ll add him into the prayer!

    Thanks again, Marie, for a great start to my day!

  121. Cheyenne

    I had a best friend who would really tear me down all the time. It started out as harmless criticism and advice and I listened and took what I felt I wanted to take from it. The situation grew into her constantly shitting on my self judgement. I was scared to make choices because I was certain my choices were going to be bad ones. When I started to actually find myself making these terrible decisions left and right, I would just repeat everything she said in my head and think to myself “She is right. I am a terrible, incompetent, immature, incoherent, person.” If I had just brushed off her extreme judgement instead of letting it fester and letting her really have her way, I believe my depression and anxiety wouldn’t have escalated to the point I am at now. Her tearing me down was one issue, but me letting her tear me down was the real issue.

  122. Hi Marie,
    great episode and great laughs for me!!

    How I react will depend on how uneducated the people are, but most of the time I will either reply with something very kind and polite to make them realize their lack of education, or something like “I was born with this beautiful hair”, or I will just ignore them, because in the end, what they are doing is just hurting their own karma, so they’ll be paid back in their coin anyway some day.

    Love,
    Anne

  123. Love this! Awesome feedback delivered with great humor. I too have struggled with the fear of criticism and rejection. It is a huge reason for not following through with so many things in my life. A very recent experience has taught me a lot about the necessary tools in order to live life to it’s fullest and not allow the negative noise to hold us back, or as you say, “take away our power”. I find it comforting to know that I am not alone when I hear someone else’s story of a similar situation that I am going through. I’m not sure if this is allowed on here, but I would love to share my story of learning how to deal with the fear of rejection and criticism if it is. You can find it at daringtoinspire.com/posts Scroll down to “From Comfort to Courage”. I have only been on the personal growth journey for a short time. I know there is so much more to learn and I thank you and all of the people who share as a service to help others become their best selves. BTW, I love your hair, fake or not. You are beautiful! Thank you.

  124. WOW!! Well said!!! Like everyone else I have my own haters. That is ok by me because it fires me up to do more and be better..
    P.S. Love the hair!!! LOL!!!

  125. Donald Hightower

    Marie your most important asset is your heart and your eyes don’t lie, anyone who is truly a positive person can see that you speak from a place of truth.
    It shows in everything thing that you do, from your charity work, to your loving friendship on the set with your great supporting cast of friends that help produce your show, i can even see how much you appreciate their efforts supporting you. Most of the time haters are just cowards and are afraid to go out into the world and become a person of value to others, in which you do every time you correspond with your community of friends and followers. Thank you again for so many from the heart words of wisdom that you have shared with your community, you have impacted many lives for that i am sure.

  126. Jaclyn Hill

    Good Afternoon Marie,
    I am sooo happy you did this video. Kindness, Consideration, Understanding, Respect for others etc are traits that seem to be going down the tubes these days. It is quite disappointing that humanity has evolved into this. Thank you for sharing your wisdom and knowledge about this subject.

  127. Thanks for addressing this, Marie.

    Being able to handle criticism really is such a crucial part of doing anything creative in the world.

    And in the spirit of sharing our ‘love notes’, I had a reader leave a 1* review for my book on Amazon, claiming it was ‘the WORST book she had ever read and she was taking it straight to the charity shop.’

    (Amazing how much time come people will spend dwelling on things they don’t like…)

    But after the initial sting, I actually found her comments quite liberating – because I no longer had to worry about getting a nasty 1* review. It had already happened – and I survived!

    Thanks for another great video. 🙂 And I loved your Do Not Engage advice.

    As Deepak Chopra says; Say No to negativity.

  128. I love the advice to stay positive while still being about to kick the fools out. Too many coaches just say to ignore those people and they will disappear without deleting them. How do I deal with going to networking events or spiritual events that have several of these same people? I end up skipping the events oftentimes. I have friends that are people pleasers and want everyone to like them- even the a*ole negative Nancys, so they invite these people. Do I find other events or try be more blunt with those critical people?

  129. A very sensitive topic over here as well!
    Thank you for sharing Celebrities Read Mean Tweets, it’s hilarious and brilliant!
    And, love your style!!!

    Hug

  130. I’ve gotten some great tips on my newsletter from criticism. Things that I didn’t see were holding me back others have pointed out.

    I would love more criticism and ideas on how I can improve my newsletter. If anyone is interested I can do the same for you.

    Here is my squeeze page.
    http://utahtexans.com/

  131. Someone said my blog about building & sewing was too sexed up and it was almost akin to tiny house porn.

    Haha

  132. As part of my business of my business is psychic reading; the baddest criticism is when someone consult me and remix my words and then said you told me something completely wrong ( thank to my intuition that happened not only a few times in my career and funniest I always which one will give me that kind of feedback)

    My answer is to let people know that they can register the reading I give, I stay open to they grieves and if I was completely wrong it have happened I offer a free reading.

    Our hair look gorgeous sorry for the haters, but for me it’s so strange that people focus on this, they get next your message as in french we said à côté de la plaque.

    Love and Respect

  133. Great video and advice. A few years ago when I was launching my own fitness brand (after close to 20 years in the fitness industry) I had a guy who I met on an online dating site tell me I was too fat and my company was stupid. A few years later I couldn’t even tell you his name but my company is very successful and I was just married to a wonderful man who could make me happier. Happiness is the best revenge!

  134. Hi Marie!

    Grand episode (per usual!)

    Years ago, I was jammed-up by a client who called me a witch, deceptive, a thief, and BAD!!! Wow, Mama!!!

    She put it all out there on Scammers. I check every once in awhile to see the comments and, lo and behold, so many, oh so many of my clients, new and long-term, write in their own FABULOUS comment on my behalf. So great to have someone else step in and tell their own truth.

    Keep on rockin’ our world, Marie!

    Paula

  135. Marieeee!!
    Loved your video, totally agree, but since I turned 40 I don’t know what happened bcs I don’t give a shh.. about what other people think, yea is difficult but worth it !

  136. I freaking adore you! Tuesdays are still my favorite, even after all these years. “Clown-holes” may be my favorite word … ever. xo

  137. Oh my Marie- this is a corker- SUCH brilliant advice, and I can certainly relate to it!

    But I wouldn’t know where to begin, telling you about the complex and lengthy psychological projections people have made about me and my work- if only it were something as simple as bitching about my hair!!
    I allowed waaay too many folks to shoot at me from the wings (and took it all to heart!), when I was out there busting my gut in the limelight- but no more, no way.

    I adore your links to celebrities laughing about their online abuse- this is absolutely the key- making fun of it, rather than carrying the weight of it around with us- boo!

    And I truly love what you say about people who criticise having too much time/ little emotional intelligence/ not creating anything good- this is a very good means of gaining perspective.

    Hehe- thanks for the laughs- love your ‘missing pants’ joke- where I come from, pants means underwear, by the way = even funnier!

    xx

  138. Marie, I love to see your new video posts in my inbox. you never fail to give be a good gafaff, inspite of your hair extensions lol. Love you hair too! Any way, yes humour is absolutely essential first and foremost for me when dealing with people’s steamy heaping piles of horse crap! As well remembering to remember to exercise humility, and to remember, I’m human and so is the person I’m interacting with. Thanks always for your pearls of wisdom!

  139. Georgie

    That’s all they got? dissing the hair? … please. That hair is ah-maz-ing! #hairjealousyissad

    Thank you for sharing this. It’s not easy when you put yourself out there, and people try to shoot holes in your game. Very beneficial.

  140. I love that Aristotle quote. I’m tired of “being nothing” because I’m too afraid of criticism to say what I want to say. Going to go say something now!

  141. Andy

    Loved this vid! I appreciate the enormous amount of effort and design in your work, as well as its soundness. I’ll add – a friend of mine once said (about a critic), “Anybody can bust into your space, but no one can live in your head rent-free unless you let them.” Keep up the great work.

  142. Rachel

    Marie, you look so fabulous always!!! Great video and I love your attitude and outlook on life! ROCK ON SISTER!!

  143. Thank you so much! It’s been a few days straight of challenges along thos lines, and you upbeat take on it is a welcome shift for my stuck brain. and I love the hair =]

  144. This is so refreshing, love it – works for the inner critic, as well:-)
    Thank you!
    Greetings from Berlin, Germany,
    Tatjana

  145. Aww, great video! Can’t believe trolls are in this house!

    One that helps me, “the only taste of success some people have is when they take a bite outta yo ass” 🙂

    I also learned this from Chopra while he and Oprah interviewed TMZ guy. If someone is saying mean things to you it shows how they feel about themselves. Also from Don Miguel Ruiz: on not being impeccable with your word, the words you say to others shows how they truly feel about themselves.

    Keep soaring, Marie, and all you lovely peeps!

    XX

  146. I did a workshop on goal-setting a few weeks ago. During the workshop a person who identified himself as a coach kept being contrite with me and was very vocal about how much he already knew. The organizer sent me the evaluations, which were OVERWHELMINGLY positive, but one person said it was a waste of time, and they didn’t like the activities.

    Of course I knew who it was, and to be honest, at first it hurt my feelings a bit, but then I realized he really didn’t help himself much either. All I could do was laugh because everything was so positive, and just one lone guy who just hated it. I imagined him as a little man alone on an island begging anyone to pay attention to him. For some reason that cracked me up even more.

    Then I wrote an email thanking him for the feedback, and how much I appreciated his candor.

    My mom always said, “Kill them with kindness”.

  147. Aimee

    Thank you Marie! Your advice couldn’t come at a better time! I realize that sometimes the people who are doing the criticizing (not the constructive kind) usually are projecting their own fears and insecurities onto you. I have to ask myself first, is their opinion mine or theirs and usually its theirs! Thank you again! You are a gift! 🙂 xoxxo!

  148. Oh Sweet Marie!
    I have not laughed that hard in MONTHS! Thank you for the insight and for always, always making my Tuesdays brighter.
    Hugs-
    C

  149. Thanks, Marie! This advice is especially helpful to us sensitive introverts who dare to put ourselves out there and then get attacked by a clownhole. It’s easier to retreat then get back out there and risk it again but I know others enjoy and love what I have to give. (BTW, as someone who uses clip-in hair extensions to fill out my fine mane, I was hoping your hair was NOT all yours–and that you’d spill your secret! Sigh… )

  150. Marie

    Thanks! I enjoyed the laughs and lesson as always! There is a saying, no one is meant to serve everyone! Thanks!

  151. EDdie Herrera Jr.

    <3 ! love this episode! 🙂
    Marie Forleo , … you are wonderful through my minds eyes!
    a consciously aware (single :)p father of 3,
    EDdie.

  152. Thank you so much Marie for this video!

  153. Evelyn

    Thank you for addressing this issue and thanks to the person who asked the question. Listening to you, I cringed when you got to the part of how you unsubscribe people, kick them out of your home. You helped me realize I have huge guilt thing going about this. so thank you for this. I realize I have spent way too much time, energy, (given away myself), in the dead end path to responding to criticism. attempting to change their mind. You’ve given me some good food to chew on. Thank you.

  154. Lisa Cross

    Hey Marie, thanks for this awesome video! I laughed so hard when you were getting your hair brushed out – I’ve never understood why people look for such ridiculous things to create rumours and speculation about. It’s a great reminder to all of us ‘heart-centered’ souls to keep on keeping on and not to take non-constructive missives to heart. Cheers!

  155. Oh so timely. 🙂

    Here’s how I got kicked off Facebook temporarily for publicly responding to a private critic:
    http://mindiekniss.com/so-youre-saying-im-a-prostitute/

    Love you Marie!

  156. Johny

    Great video Marie. Constructive criticism is very helpful though, so i’d like to give you one thing you could improve on. You really need to show more than one perspective in your interviews, at least once in a while. Sometimes it looks like a monologue from your guest, because you’re only responding with phrases like “totally agree, couldn’t say it better, that’s exactly what i was thinking”. This isn’t discussion and talk, you’re absent from the conversation because you’re not really saying anything that way. You definitely could share more than one point of view, it would be so refreshing to see people you don’t necessarily fully agree with, coming from different standpoint and looking for common ground.

  157. Jennifer Govan

    Here is my comment, I LOVE YOU MARIE!!! Even when i am feeling envious of you– the empire you created, your gorgeous mane, your adorbs personality that reminds me so much of the best parts of MY OWN, (but with more polish!!!) You inspire me and i give you your propa’s EVEN WHEN I AM JEALOUS OF YOU!!!!! 😛 nobody perfect yo!!!!
    no here is my real comment (referring to criticism) The cure for being critical is to attempt to do your heart’s desire and present it to the world!!! I was raised in a critical household, and criticised the wussers off everyone and everything i encountered!!! It just did not occur to me that everything in the world was being offered up for any other reason than for me to pass my holy judgement about!!! >>> once i found myself standing next in line to take my place at my first open mike performance, i suddenly began to listen to the woman singing before me— not with ears of judgement, but just opening my heart and HEARING her voice!!!
    It became a whole new world of love, thoughts ideas and actions that day Blessings!!!

  158. Evelyn

    A tactic I find helpful is one I’ve learned from using the books Carol Anthony and Hanna moog have written. They teach a thing called the “inner no”. It is something we are naturally able to do, but often in childhood get this “beaten out of us, forced to be loyal to someone else’s beliefs, etc. When someone is attacking us with hurtful thoughts, deeds, etc. we have help in handling this from the Cosmos. So we just have to first of all remember we have help here, we are not alone. and then ask it to help. and we do this simply by recognizing something harmful is going on, saying inner no to it within ourselves, and stopping ourselves from reacting to it. and ask for Help from our personal Spiritual Helpers. the second step is to also say the inner no to the thing motivating the other person’s actions, and ask for them to be helped by their Spiritual Helpers. biggest thing is to remember we are not alone, we have Help available to us. None of us have been taught about this, so we have not known we have this simple thing to do to handle conflicts. Try it out.

  159. Marie, you are SO brave. I mean, you took off your pants (skirt) on camera! Seriously awesome.

    Elsa, I love that skirt you chose! {Between you and me I was a little sad to see it go for part of this video. ;)}

  160. “Don’t Give Away Your Power” — YES in threes please! 🙂 We always have a right to choose what we give room and weight to in our lives. Protecting self vs. self-preservation…. there is a difference! Loving your words of wisdom today, Marie, on how to stay on top in a world of “clownholes” that prefer “put downs” over pulling from an oh-so-beautiful “snap cup” (courtesy of Elle Woods). 😉 There’s nothing better than the generosity of encouragement. Thanks for all the beauty you and your tribe put into the world. So honored to be a part of it. BIG hugs. 🙂

  161. Allyn Smith

    I love you Marie. I love your emails and watching them inspires me and makes my day, also motivates me in my business. Darling lady, great business knowledge, so wise!

    Just one thing. Today I had a “no way, she didn’t just say that” moment with your comment “hot, steamy dump in your living room” Oh gosh, that was a “cringe” for me. Have to be honest. Not your class,but still love you.

  162. I started doing videos last year. It was REALLY hard for me to even get started. However, I was inspired by you, Marie, to just take action. It was going OK (granted, the videos were nothing like yours, but every week I think they get better!). Then one day I got an e-mail. I had my FIRST YouTube comment!!!! I was pumped! The SEO must have been working!!!

    I was soooo excited and then I saw what my good friend Zach wrote under this video: http://youtu.be/CDqzqS3auYo

    Comment: Geez, make your videos better. They’re just not good

    I proudly took it in stride, thinking that this guy might have some tips to help me. I wrote back to ask about it. Then I started feeling really bad. Maybe I really had no business making these videos and this was a sign?

    THEN I looked at Zach’s videos…this Zach is a kid! a high school kid!!! And maybe I’m biased, but even this early video I made was better than his!

    It was a good lesson for me to learn. Haters gonna hate, but I just gotta keep lovin’ my biz and learning by doing.

    P.S. If any of you are worried about starting to do videos, I encourage you to check out some of my old ones. Make sure I’m not in the room, BUT if I could do it, you can do it too 🙂 It gets easier each week!

  163. Kara

    My little bit of criticism, though: Aristotle is not the one that said “Do nothing, say nothing, be nothing to avoid criticism.” It was actually Elbert Hubbard, in his book John North Wilys.

    While it may seem silly to mention this, correct citation and quotation is pretty important.

    Otherwise, great video.

    • Richard

      I noticed that as well. But, she can’t be blamed too much for that, since the internetz all over the place are saying it is actually a quote from him.

      Internetsz….. you so dumb internetsz…

      • Kara

        I know, the internet always gets quotes wrong. But, a quick google search is all that is needed to figure out its not a true quote. 🙂

        I’m not really blaming her, just saying “Hey this one thing was incorrect”.

  164. Mitra

    Marie, you are such an inspiration and perfect in every way! Thanks for all that you do 🙂
    P.S. Love your style and your beautiful hair 🙂

  165. Marie, I loved this video! You gave us some really great tips for remaining impervious to the unkind words of others. I especially loved the Eddie Murphy clip from “Delirious”. Hysterical!!! That summed it up for me. 🙂

  166. Hello Marie,

    I love you! Lol, your humour is awesome.
    I once asked a woman to leave my studio because she insulted me right before our session. She was so shocked that I had the audacity to ask her to leave. I felt good standing up for myself and the universe supported me by bringing me two new clients in her place. xxx

  167. THANK YOU MARIE for posting this, I really needed it today. You continue to be an inspiration. Love the Eddie clip, too 😉

  168. Joe

    Hi Marie — This video really hit home with me. Why the F would anyone subscribe then decide to take out their own inner garbage on you or anyone? They can simply unsubscribe. Oh man. Anyway, you inspire me as I host “CleftCast,” the world’s No. 1 podcast dedicated to the emotional well-being of the cleft and craniofacial community. Plus I’m an author, writer and damned-good singer, too. 🙂 Thanks for your videos and your encouragement. I greatly appreciate it. Peace and blessings … Joe

    PS — Maybe I should say something critical about you … Nah. I pass.

  169. Hi Marie,

    Love your hair… real or fake. Obviously, real as demonstrated by your hair stylist during your show.

    Rock On!

  170. Michaela

    I have been “trying” to be an artist for a long time. My fear of criticism, I believe has held me back from discovering my true talent. NO MORE! These past couple of years I’ve learned how to let go of that fear. I’m not ready to live off my artwork but I’m finding that people like what I do and are willing to pay for it! I AM an artist! Thank you Marie! Oh, I am jealous of your hair. 🙂

  171. Kristina

    Thanks Marie and all you people commenting here! I think a lot about how to handle my experience with harsh criticism, and hearing your thoughts on the issue makes me fired up in a good way! Power On y´all! (Quoting a Maria McKee song title) /Kristina

  172. O YEAH! YAY! I too have been overwhelmed by criticism so much so that it used to flatten me. Not anymore~ IF something stings, then I realize that it must be something I actually believe.. something that I haven’t quite come to terms with- otherwise it wouldn’t hurt. I pretty much laugh at anyone’s owies but if I don’t? I know, ooh I got work to do on loving myself much better! 🙂 <3

  173. I like your perspective. Your talking points go well in the dating arena too. Just can’t let people ruin your day with bad vibes. I remind myself, we see the world as we are not as it is.

    Thanks,

    R.

  174. Priceless criticism:
    Although I sometimes have off days, I am a naturally optimistic and smiley. Back in the day I worked in the fine dining industry. One evening I approached one of my tables to offer a glass of wine and warm welcome. It was a couple enjoying a date night. When I returned with their drinks the lady motioned me to lean in closer. With a stoic look she said, “It’s okay, you can cut the nice act.” I honestly replied with a smile and giggle, “Oh, well this is kind of my personality.”
    It actually worked out great! The husband had a good laugh which forced the lady into laughter as well. 🙂

  175. Sandra Berhard calls this nasty behavior out on Tom Greene and pulls no punches… Soooo good!
    http://youtu.be/DdTz5VPjWfU

  176. Maria, thank you for being you. Online criticism can be a great things.
    I was once criticized for the Proud Haitian app that I created an individual from Canada destroyed me with her words. My dad said there is a Haitian proverb that says:

    “It is easier to criticize than to create” so that helped me a great deal. I tried to reach out to the young person that criticized me, however they said “oh, the creator of the app wants to communicate with me now, I’m in trouble”, she never directly contacted me. I want to thank her because she was right. The graphics I used to make the Proud Haitian app could have been better and so on an so forth. Because I created a brand new Proud to be Haitian app that was cleaner, functioned better and the graphics was much much better. Maria, thank you again for sharing a part of who you are with us. You are a huge daily inspiration to me. I have to quotes for you:

    “Success comes with support we only fail in life when we fail to uplift one another”
    http://www.yanatha.com

    “We face challenges each and every day, how do we allow them to affect our lives?” http://youtu.be/kbyC-gubokc

  177. Thank you Marie!! This was so right on time for me. Just yesterday someone calls me a “female dog” on one of my YouTube videos and I’m thinking “Who does that?”. Your video helped me tons in learning to laugh off and ignore these types of comments and to understand that when you are doing great things and putting yourself out there to the world, people with low self-esteem and are non-contributors to society will be there to try and bring you down to their level.
    Those women making ridiculous comments about your hair are petty and so glad you showed them your hair is naturally FABULOUS! You are amazing and thank you again.

  178. LOVE this! You always make me laugh. Great hair!
    I got a comment from a reader once and it sounded very negative and initially really made me angry and hurt! I sat on it a day and I went back to it and it was one of the best pieces of advice I ever received. 🙂 Sometimes our egos trip us up and sometimes other people’s ego’s trip them up in how their message is relayed. But after cooling off I was much better to receive the good advice, that was permanently implemented into my blog/website – to this day!

  179. Marjorie

    should be clear your fans & supporters far out way any naysayers…

  180. tnx – good advice – the hair thing was MAGIC! Esther

  181. Sarah Cohen

    So grateful for this! I needed the reminder to not (or stop) giving away my power in the highly critical environment in which I work. Now I can just think about you, Eddie Murphy, or an early Jennifer Garner in Labyrinth!
    Thanks, Marie!

  182. Am I the only one that come here just to witness Marie’s comedic genius? I love how she is able to naturally intertwine humor with such insightful and inspiring messages. Bravo!

  183. Mohamed Abousena

    Simply gorgeous, wonderful, fabulous & awesome 🙂

  184. Uh-oh Greg is done with the hair BS. Critics got served.

    I think these criticisms are fuel to my soul. They drive me to prove them wrong. I really probably have put on a hard shell from those wonderful critical years of my life.

    Thank you Marie for this refresher. I do hope Michelle will be able to bust the ego of her critics.

  185. OMG – the hair comment is hilarious!!
    I think Marie always looks so nicely put together, & when today’s video started I thought to myself, ‘Wow, the hair is almost out of control today’! Now I see why!
    That commenter must not have many Italian Jersey girl friends – poor thing!

  186. Diosa

    lol I LOVED this video! Especially the part about you hair, because I happen to have “the talent” to guess when something is fake and YOU GIRL are one of the most natural beauty on internet so far! So I am VERY happy you burst these idiots’ bubbles. You are the bomb.com Marie! <3 good vibes your way 😉

  187. Your hair is fabulous!! You tell em’, girl!

  188. Marina

    Dear Marie,

    I loved this episode!

    I’m so afraid of criticism that I rarely write anything online. By the way, I’ve been following you for almost a year now, and this is the first time I have the courage to leave a comment here. =)

    Thank you for your help,

    Marina.

    • Hi Marina! I’m cheering you for your courage 🙂 Thanks for watching *and* commenting.

  189. RebeccafromOgden

    Thank you for this video and column. It was EXACTLY what I needed to hear today. I’m a transplant to a place where I don’t fit in and I’m trying to find my path. You’re my mentor. (Yes, even if you don’t know it). Thanks for sharing your positivity and talents!
    ~ROH

  190. Ha! This was the best. Marie, I always knew your hair was real! And thanks for bringing the obscenity back. 🙂

  191. Alessandra

    I loved this. I love all of the episodes because, let’s face it, Marie really has it all and knows how to use it. (Brains, humour, charm, smarts, wisdom, relatability, feist). But this one, and the hair-brushing-in-your-face…awesome. Great message. Thanks for always inspiring by being real, and really great!

  192. Great video! And Marie you look like a hottie tottoie boombalottie in this vid! Thanks for all you do!

    Xoxo,
    Darienne

  193. Oliver

    Hi,

    I am sensitive to criticism although it is a necessary evil and yes, there are times when it is constructive.
    How I accept criticism is by evaluating the source of the criticism, what is there perspective, and why are they doing it.

  194. Hi,

    When I was in my twenties, I would start to cry every time someone would give me critism. Part of that was me giving my power away. I thought that it meant that I had to take it on even when it didn’t fit.

    Thanks for this!

  195. The fact that you used EDDIE MURPHY makes you my soul mate LOL! As an ARTIST and Furniture painter I get these JACK HOLE comments all the time…. Sometimes they cause me to physically laugh out loud…others piss me off, but then I picture the comic book guy from the Simpsons sitting behind a computer typing on everyone’s pictures “WORST MAKEOVER EVER” and I realize some people just have “ISSUES”
    Thanks for the fun post!
    Hugs,
    Karin

  196. Just brilliant Marie! I’ll be sending this one to my 3 daughters too. Thank you.

  197. “Haters hate the ones they can’t be”
    Or as the late Notorious B.I.G said in the ‘more money more problems’ video (wow, takes me back! ) “Jealousy and envy is something that comes with the territory, man”
    Big poppa wisdom from beyond the grave…

    😉

  198. This video cracked me up.

    One of my favorite quotes by Theodore Roosevelt: “It is not the critic who counts; not the man who points out how the strong man stumbles, or where the doer of deeds could have done them better. The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena…”

    Regarding criticism…always look from where it comes.

  199. Hi Marie,

    I have been watching your inspiring videos for a few years now (and I religiously listen to Make Every Man Want You + have played it to most of my friends) and have never sent a post. You are such an incredible, inspiring woman. We need to lift one another up not pull each other down. As you say, life is so short.
    It’s hard not to let critical comments affect you. Most often when someone says something nasty, I think it says more about them than about you. And as your quote says in Make Every Man Want You “If you judge people, you have no time to love them”.
    Thanks for your videos Marie, please keep them coming.

    Kirsten
    Sydney, Australia

  200. Loved the insight in this video. And clearly your outfit & hair are fabulous. Duh!
    I’ve certainly had to deal with the critism of people thinking I’m a “housewife with a hobby” but in truth I know I’m a fierce chick in her 20s with something to say. The way I deal with it is to remember what I’m doing has nothing to do with me. I’m just the vessel. Then I’m able to keep moving forward because I know I have a purpose. Xo

    http://www.thefancyhippie.com

  201. THE BEST VIDEO TO DATE!!! <3 THIS!!! Story of my life! Well collated, well articulated and boo-ti-ful!! xxx

  202. Edna

    Hi Marie,

    Love your videos! Taking criticism personally is something I struggle a lot, so much that I let it seriously affect my confidence. Throughout college and now I’ve been trying to respond differently by just simply saying “criticism is just an opportunity to grow” because I found that criticism motivates me find ways to get better. But occasionally I get those comments that are just mean, that’s when I like to remember what my mom likes to say, “They’re just jealous” 🙂 I’m not sure that applies in every case but it does make me feel better.

    Thanks for everything 😀 Edna

  203. Helena

    Loved your new video Marie! It was original . It was something different than your last videos. I really enjoyed it. Seeing a person being so original, smart and also with social sensitivity, it’s always a pleasure.

    You are authentic Marie and that makes people jealous of you.

    Keep going, continue to make the world a better place.

  204. Marielle

    I’m pretty in love with your hair as well. It’s so awesome and I really want to know what products you use. I think your hair might be almost as awesome as your content…almost.

  205. Love it! I watch all your episodes. You rule and so does your hair 🙂

    xoxo

    LL

  206. Sooo glad you said to block and disengage rude boys and girls. Whenever anyone says anything nasty to me, I give them the verbal smackdown, which usually is amo for them to fire back. I’ve been blocking people for years. It’s the best way to protect your soul.

  207. “What other people think of me, is none of my business”.

  208. One of the toughest criticisms I ever received was for a short story I wrote. I was part of an online writers’ critique group and this one person ripped apart the story and said the main character was shallow. Well, the main character was pretty much autobiographical so for a week or so I went around questioning myself and wondering if, perhaps, I was shallow. Finally, I talked to a friend about it and and she said to me, “Carma, you’re one of the most deep people I know. You probably didn’t communicate your depth well in the story. That’s all.” Phew!

  209. Hi Marie! This video was like perfect timing!! And it kind of always is. I thought it was so refreshing for you to not only give your personal approach on how you deal with all the haters out there but share a few of the nasty comments you got. It just makes you even more relatable.

    You continue to inspire me to keep taking risks and keep being my true authentic self. I am so glad to have found you and your work. THANK YOU for all you do and for being EXACTLY who you are.

    X’s and O’s YO!
    Judi

  210. Carli Neveling

    Hi Marie,

    Such a great episode! I have really been thinking about exactly this topic for the past little while now – so it was great to get your perspective and advice on it.

    For me it has mostly been to deal with criticism of those closest to me, and so far I have just learned that it is important to try and understand the heart of the person behind the critique before deciding what to do with it!

    Thanks again for the fun episode! Love the hair and the outfit 🙂

    XO

    Carli

  211. Love this episode, especially the bit about not giving away your power!

    I’ve had a fair but of negative criticism, especially around my decisions to move to new countries a few times. It took me quite a while to learn how to extract the constructive and relevant feedback from the not so important, but it was a good realization for me to learn how to accept feedback that matters.

    The most important thing for me has been to remind myself that mean words say nothing about me and everything about the person delivering them. Very often mean words come from a place of extreme insecurity and lack of self love in the other person, not about me at all! Other people sometimes take the opportunity to use us as catalysts for their anger/insecurity. Best way is like you say Marie to reclaim that power by laughing it off!

    Thanks for a fantastic episode!

  212. Haters gonna hate. Love this video and love jamming to Taylor Swift’s Shake It Off song, which is a perfect response to HER haters. I never paid much attention to her before but I love it. 😀

  213. Hey Marie,

    True confession! I suck at receiving negative criticism. In the past, it has blown my mind. However, this episode was the cure to my frequent headache of unsolicited advice and/or comments. Thanks-(I love the hair part!)

  214. Woohoo- Marie you are amazing – love your positive vibes and strength

  215. Great video Marie

    I recently had someone have a go at me on a nutrition article I wrote for another website. They came at me with some quite outdated and frankly incorrect information.

    Normally I let some stuff go but this actually presented the opportunity to present more information on the subject that I was not able to cover in the article. So for me it ended up being an ideal situation.

    -Jamie

  216. terry kaufman

    Marie, I love your hair……….. You are super a wounderful person. How any
    body else can not see how authentic you are!!! Thank you for you for everhthing you do…………..

  217. Lynn

    Lol my long email just got deleted …. So here is a short heartfelt one as Richard Branson said in your interview with him….
    .”YOU ARE GORGEOUS” and I mean that in every way…..inside and out!!..
    I am not a fan of TOXIC people……the very best place for there opinions are in a sealed tight trash can…..Lord bless all the beautiful work you do!!!

  218. We once had a person very disappointed that greedy people are now charging for fishing tuition instead of sharing the info for the love of fishing. I checked his profile. Dude! You’re a dive instructor. Do you give away free dive instruction for the love of diving??? Haha. I directed him to the free stuff on our blog. How weird is that? No self reflection there at all haha xk

  219. Haters gonna hate!

  220. Kristin

    I have nearly 500 clients, and while most are great people, every now and then someone comes along who is impossible to please.

    My industry is extremely niche and intimate, so even if less than 1 out of 100 people is dissatisfied, they air their grievances in the one and only public online forum for the industry, that all of my current and potential future clients actively read. The few times this has happened (maybe 2 or 3 times?), it’s either been someone who wasn’t a client and was just trolling for controversy or someone who didn’t have legitimate complaints and was exaggerating or inventing issues. Either way, it reflects poorly on a company’s image, even if the accusations and complaints are fake.

    At the beginning, I took everything personally and got very defensive and would try to stick up for myself and my team, especially when the accusations were unfounded. I quickly realized that doesn’t work.

    The best advice I can give readers and MarieTV fans is to stay emotionally detached and objective. Responding in a thoughtful, professional and neutral way instead of engaging in the negativity is the best way to rise above it.

    Also – keep it short, sweet and simple. Don’t get wrapped up in the drama. Address any legitimate complaints, add closure to the situation then move on.

    The topic of this episode was also my question to Marie during RHH Live’s Q&A and it’s a very relevant and important hot button issue in today’s online business environment.

  221. Also, Marie’s hair is gorgeous. I want it.

  222. AWESOME MESSAGE MARIE!!! I couldn’t agree with you more. I realized many years ago that people treat others like they treat people and that it has absolutely nothing to do with me. To safeguard our happiness and positive energy, it’s necessary to immediately disengage with anyone who disrespects us. Unfortunately, a lot of people don’t realize this and suffer the consequences- sometimes for years.

  223. I’m a novelist & I’m amazed at the shitty reviews people will post on amazon. one in particular was something like, “the book totally blew, but I shouldered through it.” I couldn’t help but think that the only reason they did (IF they actually did) was so that they could feel justified/qualified to post their shitty review. I remind myself that some people really delight in doing things like that & that it’s their problem – not mine.

  224. Mali

    I have no words to describe how brilliant this Q and A was.

    Marie you are my hair inspiration.

  225. Marie,
    I LOVE this video, topic, and it couldn’t come at a more perfect time. I would love for you and your team to elaborate on a similar topic as this- criticism or working with other teams who only provide negative insight, criticism, push-back, disrespect, and are straight up mean. My oh my how you think you know someone before engaging in business with them on a project. As much as I check my ego at the door and act with compassion, I also can’t give my power away (as you say) and let them walk all over me! How have you dealt with working alongside other teams like this?

    Thank you!

  226. I always KNEW your hair was your own, and quite fabulous. As are you.

  227. Mishan

    Marie, you just made me laugh to tears!
    And, thank you for always standing up for what’s right.

  228. Maria Rodriguez

    Amen Sistah! Right on and spot on! Thank you! BTW Marie, you’re perfect just the way you are …obnoxious, fake hair and all! 😉 LoOoOve you! <3 <3 <3

  229. “What you think of me is none of my business.”

    My mom told me this years ago and it took me a long time to internalize it. I am grateful that it sunk in and for your advice, Marie, as my visibility is growing which is opening me up to more feedback, positive and negative.

    Once I got plugged into my true self and divine intuition I became less affected by what was going on outside of me including criticism. When I receive constructive criticism I use that same internal compass to determine whether the feedback resonates with me or not. A lot of the time it does and when it doesn’t I chalk it up to different preferences. You like chocolate, I like vanilla, neither one is right.

    If you’re curious to know how I got plugged into my true self and this divine intuition that is available to all of us please feel free to contact me at bianca@youarecomplete.com. My Vlog that explores just this launches October 30th!

    You are complete. You are whole.You are miraculous.
    Keep shining friends!
    Bianca

  230. Tamara Gavin

    Fear of criticism has been holding me back from alot. I was teased as a kid so I became comfortable with doing nothing so that people wouldn’t say anything negative. I love your take on this topic. Thanks. Love everything you do.

  231. Wanda

    Loved the episode and what I heard about a subject such as this that has always stuck with me is: “hurt people, hurt people!” So I try to keep this in mind when people feel the need to spread their venom! Keep doing what you do Marie! 🙂

  232. Brilliant, Marie! Thank you. It actually never occurred to me that your hair wasn’t real! But it makes me think, what a great option extensions could be for someone that wanted fabulous hair! It’s always in the perspective huh?

  233. Hi Marie

    My grandma used to say
    ” If you can’t say anything nice about someone, don’t say anything at all!”
    Pity not everyone keeps to that way of behaving eh?
    We don’t need negative people in our lives – if it’s just nasty stuff then Get rid! ( I still have a little peek to see if there’s even a sliver of truth and take that on board!)
    I’ve just finished reading – in one sitting as I couldn’t put it down – Steven Pressfield’s book “Turning Pro” recommended by yourself. I rekon he would say:
    Amateurs will let the nasty criticism spoil their day Professionals won’t take it personally and will get on with their day!

    Thank you SO much Marie – I love you videos – they brighten my day as well as giving me GREAT advice.
    All the best
    Clare
    XX

  234. I admit that I often find myself hesitating before posting a blog or even writing a comment on Facebook for fear of people’s reactions. I will actually consider all the nasty comments that could possibly come my way (worst case scenario) if I say specific things. I have even had reporters interview me and later worry about whether or not I worded something correctly, if I messed up my grammar (hello? I’m a writer. Apparently I’m never allowed to make a spelling or grammar mistake….ever!) or said something offensive. I recently decided that it was time to center myself before putting anything out there and not allowing internet trolls to intimidate me. If I feel good about what I’m saying and others don’t like it, they have the option to not read it and if they attack me, I have the option to delete, block or ignore them. Thanks for another great vlog. They always make me smile:-)

  235. I really enjoyed this video. I really love love that you talked about constructive criticism. Sometimes we let our feelings get in the way and we are unable to hear the message.

  236. This was fabulous, Marie. Thank you so much. It is a joy and honor to get to be part of your following. xo

  237. really excellent and motivational,

  238. I like constructive criticism if it comes with an explanation but when I get negative criticism from people, particularly if they are just haters, I like to just smile at them, nothing seems to make haters angrier than when you continue to appear really happy.
    Also, as my auntie says “don’t let negative people rent a free room in your head”
    Most nasty people, don’t exactly have a happy life either. I often find the ones that try to bring me down the most, are the most unhappy people out there and often they are unhappy with themselves.
    Whoever it was that comment on you hair probably has a hang up on their own and thus seeing your really pretty hair, have become angry and decided to vent this anger by trolling you and bringing your positive emotion down to there negative level of emotion.

  239. Delilah

    Thanks Marie! “Criticism comes with creativity” is certainly something I’ve grown to understand and accept. It echoes what I’ve learned from Tara Mohr – that all substantive work brings both praise and criticism. 3 other things I learned: 1. feedback tells you about the person giving the feedback; it doesn’t tell you anything about yourself. 2. If you find the negative feedback particularly wounding, devastating or charged, ask yourself, “how does this criticism mirror what I believe about myself?” 3. Look to family and friends for support, not feedback!

  240. Aracely

    Love the video! I enjoy all your videos Marie – keep dishing up your saucy, vivacious and at times a needed “punch you in the gut” point of view and ideas for women. Ps.. I knew your wasn’t fake. Besos y abrazos..

  241. Loved this episode for soooooooo many reasons. think you should of labled it “Marie takes her pants off”. It may of gone viral, lol.

    • Kristy! So funny! I agree. Maybe I should take my pants off in my next vlog? Hmmmm……..

      Thank you Marie for sharing your awesome sense of humor with us! ;D

      Bianca

  242. Hey Marie… Great episode and gave me a good chuckle… And loving those crazy hair extension of yours they rock!!

    But on another note, when it comes to critiscm I think the worst type to deal with is when it comes from someone you know and respect.. Agree when it’s constructive.. We can be brave and grow from it, but sometimes especially when you are starting out in a business it just hurts or we have to somehow navigate around it to keep going.

    Julie x

  243. This has been happened to me lately after I graduated, I got these brilliant ideas to start doing what I’m gonna do but people keep giving negative critics to me until I was at the point where I do nothing. And then I realised how it’s just not making any sense. Every job has its risks and we should just go for it and if we get some barriers later, we can always find the solution! Thanks for making great videos, I love your video always Marie. Love ya. xx

  244. Marie, This is one of my favourite video of yours! AWESOME and ver timely!

  245. Maxine Gianelloni

    When I first started my business in February on this year, I knew I had one competitor in the same type of business locally. I even reached out and in effort of mutual respect and support but was told and I quote; “I’m not so sure that was the best move for you to recently open up a business in a place where the needs for those accessories were being met, and being met well.”
    It hurt, in fact brought me to tears. I doubted my choices…at first. Then my husband said he wondered if Coca-Cola said that to Pepi when they opened up shop. Then I decided to shake it off and those words have stuck with me and I have thrived on them. She has since sent me numerous messages and criticisms on my work and items, yet we have never spoke face to face. I never reply just turn my cheek and revel in my ever growing upward slope of growth since opening. I wish her no ill will cause after all her criticism keeps my fueled to do better.

  246. Isabel Guerra

    First “turd muncher” then “clown hole,” …..I’m dying! Thanks for the laugh today, it was a great antidote to a long day. By the way, I wish I had that head of hair, lucky gal!

  247. Teresa

    OMG….I listen to all your vid’s but this one is so stinking FUNNY!!! Thank you sooo much! I really needed to hear this today, you have no idea…and yeah, awesome hair! I always knew it was real. Gorge <3.

  248. Dale Jackman

    The thing about online trolls, and it probably applies to anyone who makes nasty criticism, is that they have never achieved any success in their own lives. The closest they come is their ‘success’ in dragging others down. Tell them this and ask them to prove it wrong by giving examples of success in their own lives. They probably wont be able to and will respond with their stock in trade – nastiness. Keep to the point and ask them to please provide examples of success in their own lives. If they continue to be nasty they are proving the point, or they will hopefully grow quiet and maybe even have a think about themselves.

  249. Ian Cullingham

    Hello Marie
    It is just wonderful, hearing your words of wisdom and watching your videos ha ha Greg brushing your lovely hair to prove it is real, because others say nasty things.
    Marie your hair is beautiful.
    You help inspire me and many other people, many comments are full of goodness and that is nice.
    Yes you are right.
    I always try to keep my dream alive no matter what. right now I have picked up a couple of jobs, one I start tomorrow in the Solar power industry the other is bond cleaning, I run a small cleaning business, my plan is to turn it into something really good build up a good customer base, then sell it.
    In my vast experience there are always those who try to pull one down with their negative comment, what they do not realize, is they are giving their energy away to lower forces. Being positive raises one above onto a spiritual level, my attitude is that nothing is impossible it is mans limited perception that clouds the awareness, due to years of conditioning.
    I admire anyone who breaks the barriers which bind them, and sets themselves free.
    I believe a lot of people’s actions are a result of their acquiescence to the
    tyranny of this world.
    Here are a few quotes from very famous people
    The best way of removing negativity is to laugh and be joyous.
    Only when we know who we are, can we know freedom
    Infinite love is the only truth, everything else is illusion
    David Icke
    Never be ashamed! There’s some who’ll hold it against you, but they’re not worth bothering with.
    J. K. Rowling

    So long as the people do not care to exercise their freedom, those who wish to tyrannize will do so; for tyrants are active and ardent, and will and will devote themselves in the name of any number of gods, religious and otherwise, to put shackles upon sleeping men; – Voltaire
    What I am saying is that a lot of people’s actions are a direct result of their conditioning century after century.
    Man know thyself.

    Regards Ian

  250. MLH

    Thank a lot Marie!!

    I just binge watched Mean Celebrity Tweets and my cheeks hurt from laughing so hard (…that would be face cheeks…)

  251. Diana

    Thank you for all your wonderful videos Marie. This one really came at the right time. i am on the receiving end of a great deal of verbal abuse from my 15 year old daughter at the moment. For a while I let it get to me and did all the silly Mum stuff, blaming myself, it was all my fault and then one day about 3 weeks ago I suddenly really heard what she was saying and realised it was all about her own fears, and anger. Duh…took me far too long! Now just as you suggest keeping my sense of humour is so empowering (last night she was screeching at me that she was going to call the local old peoples home and have me committed) I nearly fell over laughing! Your statement about not giving away your power is so true. Now all she gets is my love and compassion I’ve found my inner Xena Warrior Princess. Something others might like to try…when she is being particularly nasty I imagine throwing a frisbee at her head. No blood or anything of course, she is my daughter, but I imagine the thwack noise it makes like in a cartoon. Sooo therapeutic. I’m sure she going to be a wonderful person in the end because she has fabulous hair JUST LIKE YOURS! XX

  252. “Clown-Holes”

    I Love It. And I love all of your points. This is one of my Favorite
    Marie TV episodes!

    Thank you Marie!

    Love,

    Tatia

  253. Hi Marie Forleo

    I love all your videos. This one particularly hit home because I’m a published author and just read a very critical review of my latest Simon and Schuster novel on Amazon. Funny thing is, I laughed at it. Now the old me, the newly published author 10 years ago would have cried and questioned my own God-given creativity, but today I can honestly say that criticisms make me stronger because they let me know that I’m accomplishing my goal of really making a difference in the world through my writings. So thanks for this video that came right on time. Keep dancing, keep laughing and keep being yourself because the more free you are to be you, frees me up to be myself as well. Much Love!

  254. This is my favorite episode yet. It hit home for me because I am always worried about not being liked, and when I stick up for myself I usually feel guilty and wonder how I could have reacted differently. It is ok to tell people like it is, especially when it’s right and when it’s done respectfully. It’s also ok to tell people to “f” off sometimes. Thanks for the Eddie Murphy bit!

  255. Oh my golly me! Thank you SO MUCH for this video! You are so freaking hilarious and I absolutely love how you share so much amazing goodness…..and also! How you don’t take yourself so seriously! What a great lesson to learn! Thank you! x

    p.s. Where can I buy your hair? *giggle snort* Ahhhh Clown-holes….. 😀

  256. Wow Marie. Awesome episode. Learning to grow past the storm of comments is an area that I used to fear. Until I started to hear how professionals like you over come such obstacles. It is great to hear another message from another great only celebrity. Thank your for sharing.

  257. sara

    Ahhh I LOVE celebrity mean tweets! I would LOVE a regular feature of Marie reading crappy comments. James Altucher and Ramit Sethi did a really funny one too https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=D743aYOHy-M

  258. Marie, this was a good video.
    You reminded me of a book by Shiv Khera – “You Can Win”.
    He clearly called these people as “blood sucking parasites” or Crabs.
    Who have sufficient time to pull you down because they themselves don’t want to move outside the container but when they see anyone doing something, they pull there leg down.
    Since then I have been avoiding “blood sucking parasites” as they are good for nothing, just ignore them, say yes to them and laugh with them, tell them they are right. So, you can calmly think over when you are alone but don’t give them your personal space or time, they are negative people who drain your energy in negative criticism and just move on.. 😉
    Remember in bold and italics, please do not give an explanation to them on there criticism, you will be in trouble. Just say yes, make them go or you move on.. 😉

  259. Bo Stranska

    Marie, this was A-mazing!! Thanks 😉

  260. Nancy-Lynn Vorel

    You are so f*cking adorable! Go Girl, Go!

  261. Nischay

    Hi Marie,
    The video is nice , the way i deal with criticism is the way i am dealing with it right now , i am new in business and my fatehr says that i am no good at it and now i should go and do some job , where he is the reason i came into my business. The only way to deal with criticism is to be shameless and do what u like , u have the power to change ur destiny and that is what i am doing , i am being shameless bcoz i know that for few years i have to face this and when results fall in my way then this criticism would change into blessings.

  262. Philip Prater

    Terrific! Especially helpful to those of us who are just getting started in developing a website (and blog) Love ya!

  263. Great episode Marie. I love watch your films 🙂 Dealing with criticism is sometimes difficult. Especially if you criticize the person closest to you. I think this is the most depressing. Lack of understanding from others can be painful. But if you criticize me completely foreign to me this person for a moment I think about it and then just stop and that’s it. You are an amazing person and I very like watch, listen to you. I’m at the beginning of my business and life way, I start make changes and I hope that persevere. Your videos and your blog really help me in this.

  264. Sarah

    Marie, you are fantastic! Thanks for being a positive voice in this world. This article/vlog came just in time for me. My sister and I were recently verbally harassed by a stranger for no apparent reason other than she was angry at something else and took it out on us because we were lucky to be present at the anger eruption. Her brief yet vile remarks have stayed with me for the past week. My sister has seemed to bounce back like nothing but I was having difficulty and you have put things into perspective and I am ready to move on. Thank you and your amazing hair.

  265. John

    Hi Marie, love your show. ps Love your hair lol x

  266. Love this advice Marie. Haters can really hurt and put you off your game, especially early on in our online career, so it’s really important to talk about this openly and share our experiences.

  267. El

    Thanks for this awesome video Marie. I sometimes get upset by harrassment and bs even from strangers, but now i know how to handle them better. Your hair is really fabulous and to die for. Love x

  268. One of the best episodes you ever made, Marie. Thank you so much for beeing you!

    Christina

  269. ahahahaha this video is hilarious 😀 !! Thank so much for being such a force of nature!!! Made my day start with a smile!

  270. May

    Hi Marie + Team Forleo!
    I know this is a LONG and troubling read, but it is important, so I hope you take the time. I’ve been a big fan since 2011, and was excited about today’s topic because it seemed so timely.

    However, I was waiting and wishing for you to address the darkest shades of online criticism: harassment, abuse, and threats. Have you had to deal with this, or have you known anyone who has? If so, what have you done?

    I write this specifically because I came to realize that I am terrified (TERRIFIED) of this more malicious and, yes, violent kind of attention because it has been rife in my online communities as of late, specifically with regard to personal heroes of mine and friends.

    As recently as last week, a friend not only received hate mail, but death threats for being in a video that went viral (think Daily Show-type sketch about a serious topic). The threats weren’t in the video’s comments but sent to her. Directly. Her name wasn’t on the content itself, which implies that there was some effort involved in obtaining her contact info. Another friend of mine confessed to me that she quit acting despite her star being on the rise after a relative of someone in the industry kept sexually harassing her through fake online profiles–threats which culminated with that person sending her the equivalent of a dead rat to her doorstep.

    There is much happening right now with women who I not only respect but had hoped to emulate like Felicia Day or Anita Sarkeesian– women leveraging their love of geeky things to entertain and inform online. Last week, Ms. Day was doxxed: that is, her home address and personal email were exposed online.

    Ms. Sarkeesian canceled a speaking engagement at a college because there were threats of gun violence. She even had previously left her home because of threats made against her *and her family* which are now being investigated by the FBI…

    Of course this is the extremest of the extreme. But as I see discourse dissolving, I’m seeing extremities of some kind becoming par for the course: doxxing, hacking, slut-shaming, death threats, X-rated Photoshopping, etc. This isn’t just on comment boards but on social media which are really our neighborhoods and places of business online. I think what has been particularly troubling is that this behaviour is ultimately in reaction to topics related to entertainment– they aren’t geopolitics or health crises.

    SO: I ask, after insult-proofing your ego (Taylor Swift’s song is a great anthem!) and before you need to call the FBI (extreme!), how do you or would you handle *abuse*? What if what’s stopping you isn’t your fear of criticism, but your fear for your own safety and that of your family?

    DEEP GRATITUDE for all that you do, and for reading this,
    M

    Article about Ms. Day: http://www.theguardian.com/technology/2014/oct/23/felicia-days-public-details-online-gamergate

    Also, here’s this article from The Atlantic:
    The Unsafety Net: How Social Media Turned Against Women
    http://www.theatlantic.com/technology/archive/2014/10/the-unsafety-net-how-social-media-turned-against-women/381261/2/

  271. Why was this video so awesome?

  272. Luli

    Hi Marie,

    I love You so much! I can believe those people say bad things about your hair. I always know you have such a good hair and honestly never knew it was all yours but to actually take time and right bad things about someone is such horrible things to do, anyway, thank you for motivate me, you do not know how much i appreciated your motivativation and encouragement every tuesday.

    Keep the good and work and God bless You.

    Luli from UK

  273. Marieo!
    I LOVE this video!
    Thank you!
    -Payam From Iran

  274. It all comes down to not taking criticism personally.
    It’s just the criticizer point of view.

  275. Love that you had the courage to take your pants off on camera, you go girl!

    … I realise that your pants-lessness was not the point of this video, but I can still admire your bravery none-the-less.

  276. i freakin love you. thanks for brightening my inbox up! and keepin it real (even your hair.lol)

  277. Totally digging this ep! It can be really scary to take a step to the side and do something you know in your heart is right, but other people ‘just don’t get’. Strange how we look at this differently in our business than other areas of our lives – would you take renovation advice from someone who’s never lifted a hammer? No. Would you take medical advice from someone with no medical expertise? Hell no!

    I actually see a lot of the time this coming from women trying to bring other women down (eg. your hair Marie! What’s that got to do with how kick-ass you are anyway?) rather than from men. Well let’s put an end to this and be supportive of one another!

    Great work Marie!

  278. Jana

    Love this video. Arjuna Ardagh also wrote a fantastic piece on how he dealt with the putridness that came his way after a video he made ‘Dear Woman” on the conscious men channel went viral . The blog post he wrote is worth the read and has stayed with me for years.

    http://www.arjunaardagh.com/cyberventing/

  279. THANK YOU! This has driven me nuts for some time now. If people come into my facebook page and criticize ME publicly Im fine with it. But when they go onto my facebook page and criticize my clients’ bodies, fat loss, and success I wont stand for it. I normally ban people, tell them their opinions are not warranted, ask them if they would appreciate someone saying things like that about them, etc. But one day I decided to put some really nasty women on blast in this blog post: http://thegetinshapegirl.com/drama/

    Since then it’s toned down quite a bit. People appreciated me putting it out there that I will always stand up for my clients. it may have been a risky move doing what I did, but my true believers appreciated what I did.

    • Jennifer

      Good for you for standing up for your clients!!

  280. I had some criticism before when I quoted my teacher saying that if you have enough money for your basic needs and then some left over to peruse your spiritual path you were the most blessed in the universe and a yoga teacher commented below saying I shouldn’t be charging for spiritual classes and spiritual pursuits should be free of charge !!! The hypocrisy !!! Ha. Forgave and deleted 🙂

  281. SPOT ON!!!

  282. Mayssam

    Love you so much Marie .. You’re amazingly awesome

  283. Diana

    Great video! You are wonderful!

  284. Christine

    Thanks Marie! I’m not the Christine that asked the Q, but still I benefitted from the A! I’ve struggled with criticism forever and only now as I enter my 50th year on planet earth am I starting to manage it better. Thanks for the insight. Keep on doing your thing! Namaste. 🙂

  285. Jennifer Woods

    If a piece of criticism really stings, I know that it has brought up something inside of me that I’m already feeling or some thought/idea/feeling that I’m afraid others will think about me. In that case, I know I’m projecting that feeling and it’s coming back to me. When that happens, I sit with the feeling and develop a strategy to overcome the negativity surrounding that thought, feeling, or idea.

    There’s an old saying, “The higher up the flagpole you climb, the more your butt shows.” When someone is just being mean, I remember this saying and think to myself, “If it’s so easy and you have the solution, why don’t you come up here and try it?” For some reason, that makes me feel better to keep on keeping’ on.

  286. Ana

    This is my most favorite video of yours. You just help me solve a parenting issue. I am going to show my 6 year daughter because she gets so upset when her big brother picks on her

  287. loannis

    Hi Marie..

    I loved this video, Thank you sooo much for the advise…I was shocked to see how people can be so unkind and talk about someone ‘s hair, which by the way, you have a gorgeous hair, however, it wouldn’t matter if you wear extensions or not, because no everyone is so lucky to have a beautiful hair…
    I think you are very classy and beautiful

    I appreciated the advice…..
    I ‘v been working on ignoring criticism unless I hear that someone is trying to help me and not to put me down ( even though It could be something I don’t want to hear) , but as you said it s so important to know that we will always encounter people who see the best in us, and people who could only pick on our hair, our nails, etc, etc….

    Thank you for always been yourself and teaching me that just because I m spiritual it doesn’t mean I cant have a human reaction

    Have a wonderful day!

  288. Thank you so much for this timely A to Q Marie. As a homeopath, I face a lot of criticism by people who like to try to discredit me and my profession. But the more outspoken I get about it, the more my business flourishes, so I am now very grateful to them and have written extensively about why I’d like to thank them for helping to boost my Google ratings and for pushing my Klout score from 10 – 42 (a Klout score is a number between 1-100 that represents your online influence – see klout.com) – all of which is helping clients find me (I’m already seeing lapsed patients returning after being informed of this issue, as well as an increase in new patients). So gratitude is my best weapon. Thanks Marie! http://www.hautmanhomeopathy.com/advertising-standards

  289. Michelle

    Marie, thank you so much for this episode of Marie TV. It resonated with me. I am a very sensitive person so I take criticism very seriously to the point that it’s paralyzing me to put anything out there for fear of being judged and criticized.

    I love how you said that we shouldn’t give away our power. It stuck with me because I now realized that keeping these criticisms to heart will not help me grow and help people. It will put me down and pull me back. I should NEVER give anyone that power over me.

    Again, thank you for your insights every week.

  290. Hi Marie,

    Thank you so so much for posting this video and all your videos but this one in particular. I am now starting my own business and although I have been a follower of yours for a long time, I have only now decided to really make a go of it.

    Your videos always give me that little perk that I need to keep moving in the right direction and this one in particular has been very helpful. Especially when plagued with your own self doubt, it is sometimes hard not to let the criticism of others seep in.

    Love how you handle things and I am a big fan of Jimmy Kimmel’s mean tweets. My fave is Sofia Vergara’s – hahaha.

    Also – keep up the videos and you have to tell me who your stylist is. I want to raid your closet.

    Vivienne

  291. Yup, I got some of those too 🙂

    They sting when they are super elaborated, which shows that people really thought them through and may have the impression that they give constructive criticism.

    If they are obviously sent on the spur of the moment and out of the context, it’s easy to ignore.

    thanks for this,
    Llyane

  292. dora

    If everyone liked everything you did that means everyone would be exactly the same , and that would be a very boring world . I listening to everyone’s opinion whether good or bad , I take what I can use from it and throw out the rest, for me is a tool which I gauge improvement . If someone is speaking on my business negatively ,well the person they tell and the person they tell and the person they tell, etc. Someone will actually take a look for themselves and like it . Besides, I enjoy having free rent in peoples head .

  293. This episode was so great, Marie!

    I admit that I have let horrible criticism take away my power — over a year ago I released a very vulnerable video about body image and orgasms and immediately my views skyrocketed, but so did my negative comments. I have people saying they couldn’t believe that someone would actually have sex with me, another that I should KILL MYSELF after creating that video.

    Needless to say, I let those hate comments get to me and didn’t release another video for AN ENTIRE YEAR.

    HOWEVER, that ONE video scored me my first VIP client at $3,500 — so I enjoyed my victory while processing my own insecurities being reflected in my comments.

    TODAY I am very happily making videos again and have let go of the desire to please everyone.

    This is such a great reminder — I put “YOU CANNOT BRING ME DOWN, I WILL NOT GIVE YOU THAT POWER” on a sticky note front and center in my office!

    THANKS AGAIN MARIE! You rock!

    Hugs,
    Blake 🙂 xo

  294. Great video Marie! Your hair does rock. Seriously, I just remembered some major fierce online criticism that I think has been lurk, just barely forgotten yet still psyching me out.

    When I first started my personal chaffing business, about 5 years ago, I auditioned to be on Grilling with Bobby Flay. I made a video, posted it online and it honestly was a big deal to my family. They were really proud.

    Well the second comment below my video: which featured a ghost pepper-mezcal cocktail said something like: “You should be on Semi-Homemade with Sandra Lee, you LUSH.” In retrospect, kinda weirdly satisfying but at the time was very upsetting. I did not expect anyone to be mean to me for making this cool video, it seemed so bully-ish.

    Anyways, I loved the Aristotle quote and am adopting it as my mantra:
    “To avoid criticism say nothing, do nothing, be nothing”. Thanks for helping me to excise those fear of criticism demons. It’s gonna be a lifelong battle, but worth it.

  295. Morag Barrett

    Love the videos (and the hair) keep it up. This one made me laugh. I am always curious about the people who choose to sign up, and then complain. You can always UNSUBSCRIBE if it doesn’t turn out to be a great fit.

    You are right, we can’t be all things to all people, hear the feedback, if you are hearing the same thing over and over, maybe there’s a theme that warrants further thought and maybe a change in approach. However, it’s your life, your journey, live it how you wish and realize not everyone will see it the same way or agree. Here’s the thing – they don’t have to!!

  296. E. S. Wong

    Marie–

    What can I say? Haters gotta be jelly of your style AND your hair – both are AH-MAZING! 🙂 I totally covet both and you make it work every time.

    Personally, for me, I love receiving constructive and regular criticism too – I think this speaks to my old-school Asian upbringing which helped to toughen my skin. There are a few cracks now that I’ve been working with a life coach to be more vulnerable and to really explore who I am. Otherwise, I think criticism is a way for people to bring you back down to their level, since you were flying high above them in the first place.

    PS. You, your style, and your hair ROCK!

  297. For the record, I LOVE your hair- even if it were extensions.

    Also, for the same record, I might watch more MarieTV if you threw in a few pantsless episodes…. just saying, from a marketing perspective…..;-)

  298. Beejay

    I really enjoy your episodes, Marie! This one touched a raw nerve in me. I used to get very upset when people criticized something I did or said but I got better when I realized that some of them were simply jealous and envious about me. Nowadays, when someone criticizes me I pick what I can use to improve myself and leave the rest. Sometimes I just shrug it off and or I just simply tell them they are entitled to their opinion and leave it at that. I just learned a few more ways to handle criticism. Thanks again. And I also love your hair and your style in general!!!

  299. Now that my online presence is growing more and more, I do get a good bit of criticism. When it’s frivolous or just clearly combative or cruel, I don’t even give them the time of day. However, if it’s even marginally constructive, I will engage in conversation with them.

    My channel (youtube) and website are all about vegan education and I do get very combative and at times heated comments. People will always ask why I didn’t address a certain iota of the topic I was covering, or criticize how i covered it. After 25+ hours of work for one 5 minute video, this can be frustrating at times! I also have people attack me personally.

    In all of that what I try to do is remember my purpose- to educate for the sake of the animals. And they don’t really care what mean people are saying, they just want protection. And any insult that can be hurled at me is nothing compared to what the animals go through.

    Of course, if there is even a grain of validity in the criticism, I take it to heart and evaluate whether I should adjust my approach.

    Thanks for this topic, Marie! It’s still an everyday task for me to work on this aspect of my online presence.

  300. Great tips. (and just for the record) I think you’re awesome! Thanks for being you!

  301. Thanks so much for this video! I just watched and it was very timely.
    One of those weird, recurring, criticisms I get from time to time:
    “You must have a lot of free time on your hands.”
    Ugh. Sucker punch.
    I want to say:
    “Uh…I worked Reallllly hard to carve out time to do X project because I felt passionate about it.”
    Or:
    “I watch almost zero tv…so it leaves me with time to work on things I’m interested in.”
    I usually take a semi-high-road/fairly-self-deprecating approach and say something like:
    “It keeps me off the streets.”
    But the REAL truth is:
    We all have 24 hours in our days…and we all have the awesome responsibility and gift of getting to choose For Ourselves how we spend it.
    So…go drink something from under your sink.
    …Oh
    oops….
    I seem to be venting.
    I’m gonna go do some breathing exercises then watch your WONDERFUL video again.
    Thank you for all your inspiration!
    You rock, Ms. Marie!

  302. Jessica

    Q. Who is smart, snappy and snazzy? A. It’s you!

    Keep up the great work, because we love watching.

  303. Maria

    Hi Marie! This came in a timely fashion. I just opened your email and I just got over dealing with my co-worker who happens to be my brother who criticized me to gain more power. I just walked away and told him that it was his deal and not mine. I just got back from a powerful Core Strength Experience (via Michael Bernoff) and used that reminder along with your video to just “get over it” and not be emotional about it. Thanks a bunch! Oh, and I love your hair!!!!

  304. Mary Therea

    Marie,

    Just watched the episode of criticism and simply wanted to say that I truly enjoy your segments, thus the reason I signed up for them. They are refreshing, enjoyable and you definitely come through as being simply..Marie and wonderfully authentic. Just keep being true to yourself and I will definitely keep tuning in.
    Have a blessed day!
    Mary Theresa

  305. Karin

    I love the way you explain things Marie, that is why I have you in my list of mentors. Thank you, thank you, for sharing your wisdom with us! “Criticism comes with creativity” is my new mantra too. Karin

  306. Belinda

    Thanks Marie – totally loved the episode & down-to-earth advice. I’ve been dealing with criticism for years but it always helps to hear a fresh take on it and to know it happens to people I admire (means I can’t be too bad either) 😀

    I love the way Marie took down the mean Marie comments but I was flabbergasted that people could come up with this stuff! (anyone can see that hair is natural! Sheesh! :D)

    I had a thought though … “obnoxious”. I wonder if that’s the word people use when they see someone confident and can’t quite accept that level of confidence in another person. Makes me feel better to think about it that way 🙂

  307. OM PRAKASH

    Enjoyed your video a lot. Educative.
    Good to find that I can criticize you severely now and you will be able to take it lightly (joking)
    While watching discussions (arguments) on TV I found many leaders remain un-purturbed by criticism and direct personal attacks. They are able to maintain their calm. These are educative moments indeed.
    Generally it is a good idea not to initiate or utter any such word which can spark off discussion in the bitter direction. If some other participant does it, answer only the core issue and neglect the emotion or hate part of it.
    It is easy to say, but we falter when in action 🙂
    Om

  308. Dear Marie,
    this video is so good, funny and helps a lot. Critizism can hurt a lot and your word are really empowering.
    Thanks al ot
    Petra

  309. You are awesome Marie, and yes I have had an army of hate, meaning I must be really cool right, in the beginning as I did not know what hate was, it really screwed me up, like ha, hey , why hate me , I am cool, real, caring and here to make you happy and then I had to realize there are groups of people that live on hate and destruction and so now they have a place in my life, out of my life, I do listen to good talk meaning if I need improvement, but never the kind of, we want you to die today hate, lol So yes I was floored big time and now with lot’s of help from You!! and others I am awesome now on the hate thing in my career, they are at the end of the day and I hate to say this, Losers.!! and I know as of it I am serious on track and on the good note all the good talk hate, really has helped me be even stronger and on track in my life and career.

  310. Meredith

    Love you Marie!!!

  311. For those who don’t mind bad language (I’m looking at you Marie 🙂 there’s a hilarious set of youtube videos a voice actor makes in which he reads the awful youtube comments/criticisms people make to him in various celebrity voices. (He typically makes dubbed comedic vids like this one, “Mafia Babies”: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=P95klDPBjXY )

    He calls his series of vids “Celebrity Hate Mail” – This is a great example for everyone who needs a good laugh at all the stupid, hateful things people say/write: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dVHnaQ8DSKE

  312. I just had this conversation last night with someone and Marie you couldn’t be more right!

  313. Hi Marie

    Many many thanks for this video. We can’t change the world; we can only do the best what we can. I have three polices in life No judgement – No Complainant – No blaming. I think this make life, family, business easier and like you said I laugh at the criticism, which is best.

    With love, Anju x

  314. Loved this episode!
    One of my subscribers once told me that I need to wash my mouth out with soap and then I would gain respect. They also said that profanity is cheap “ESPECIALLY for woman!”.
    I had a good laugh with that one.

  315. Navid Parandeh

    Thank you for the content as always. As someone who’s afraid of criticisim your input was much appreciated and thank you the lady who asked the Q. Marie you and your team are awesome and amazingly loving and I think it would be soooo much fun working with you as it seems you are the same behind and on camera. Seriously someone did ACTUALLY critcise your hair, get a life!!

  316. My favourite take on how to handle criticism: “your opinion of me is none of my business.” Try that on for size. Looks good, dunnit…? 😉

  317. Michelle

    Marie! ….. I just want to add in that I’ve never once doubted the authenticity of your hair. 🙂

    ~ another gurl with big hair

  318. Taylor

    Great episode. Marie is funny.

  319. I love this. Thank you for the wisdom as always. I actually get the same comments about my hair – yay for the larger than life locks! I love watching your videos and I have never turned away without laughing or being inspired, usually it’s both. Thank you for what you do, the world needs it!

  320. Another great way to deal with critics is to provide a witty response to their comments. The on that I liked was delivered by Sir Winston Churchill. When Nancy Astor told him “Winston, if you were my husband, I’d put poison in your coffee.” Without missing a beat, Churchill replied: “Nancy, if you were my wife, I’d drink it.”

  321. Christine Baird

    Thank you Marie! Loved this one!

  322. one professor in my masters program said “Your paintings have no soul.”
    Well if his artwork is an example of soul- then I don’t want it!

    PS I never doubted your hair. My hair is thick too 😀

  323. Love this Marie. Starting my business definitely more exposed to criticism and I had to toughen up. I keep reminding myself that for every negative comment, I have at least 10 positive comments and happy clients and I remind myself of those who I was able to help and make a difference in their life.
    My husband’s college professor he told him he’s not made for grad school. Hubby has a PhD degree…

  324. Thanks Marie. I found this really helpful. I am a filmmaker and dealing with criticism and rejection is part of my practice. Best wishes!

  325. Test

    Hello Test

  326. Great video, love it and such a valuable point. A lot of people let this get to them. When you are promoting yourself and your idea/vision people are going to criticize you no mater what. I just always think myself when they do it to me, that I kind of feel sorry for them that they do not have dreams or goals to go after the things they want. Most of the times people are just plain jealous 😉

    Just my two cents.:-)

    Piet Hein

  327. I just LOVED this video. This is the first video I ever watched of you. My friend Laurel who is enrolled in your b-school told me about you. And this video came to me at the best time. I was feeling awful because of rudeness being directed towards me in the last few weeks. Your video made me feel much lighter. Thank you!

  328. Looking forward to the day my biz gets big enough that peeps get jealous & try to criticize! Hehe! Hoping I remember then where I have been & how I got there & let all that icky jealousy roll right off.

  329. Always love your advice, humor, vocabulary, clothes & even your hair. I recommend your Q&A to every business owner. Especially fond of the ‘clownhole’ and ‘steamy dump in your living room’ references this week. Keep it coming. You rock.

  330. This is my fave so far! Love all your videos, but this is fantastic! Excellent advice. (By the way, you are rawkin’ that gorgeous hair and outfit!)

  331. Hi Marie,

    I finally watched and absolutely loved this episode! Your infused sense of humour is priceless (as always) and I enjoyed the valuable nuggets of wisdom, great tips and sharing of criticism you’ve personally received. I love quotes and the one you shared by Aristotle is definitely a keeper. (Makes me want to actually celebrate criticism!) 🙂

    Thanks also for sharing that awesome Jimmy Kimmel video – I’m still laughing! Loved it! There’s something divinely healing about laughter and seeing those actors wholeheartedly laugh off some pretty cruel comments the way they did, really was an added bonus to your own video. I’ll keep you all in mind (including Aristotle) when I find myself dealing with my own experiences of criticism. 🙂

    Love & Appreciation.

  332. Nathalie Shalofsky

    Dear Marie,
    I have been following you for over a year and half now and been waiting for your Tuesday Q& A every Tuesday evening (ffor me here in Switzerland, EUrope) and Ilove it BUT I have to say this one made me laugh out loud – I love your hair ! )
    Please continue to bring us inspiring and educating moments with Marie TV.
    Love from Nathalie

  333. Carmen

    LOVE you are so funny!

  334. What a great attitude, Marie! I love your hair, by the way!!

  335. Marie> I freaking love you & all that you stand for. Thank you, Amber

  336. Ahhh, gorgeous one! I love your style, your vibe, your playfulness and I gotta admit, I love putting on accents too!
    Yar…I even had an ex business partner write me a 12 page ‘you hypnotised me’ style dissertation that mimicked his new girlfriend’s child court stuff in set out and aaaargh!
    I’m sooo thanking me for being a big girl and knowing the difference between… ‘ouch, yeah I did’ and ‘ouch, your a d…kwad’ !
    Thank you for being you…you so often come up with ‘just what I needed to hear’ and all that.
    PS I have thick hair too – and greyed early on! People used to ask me where I got it done! Go figure… swish away, darlington!

    x Cath

  337. Stacy Timm

    I look forward to your weekly videos. They are very inspiring . I can’t wait till b-school starts. Thank you for being you and putting a smile on my face every week!!!

    ~Stacy

  338. Roselynn

    The way I think about it. Criticism and any other comments are a reflection of the person talking. It has more to do with how they experience the world than it does about you.

    Thanks marie for

  339. Roselynn

    The way I think about it. Criticism and any other comments are a reflection of the person talking. It has more to do with how they experience the world than it does about you.

    Thanks marie for

  340. Cristina

    Good Video!!

    Sometimes we are the most critical with ourselves

    I love your hair, I love your advice and I love love love your TV.

    AH!! Thanks for the subtitles

    BW
    Cris

  341. Carlos

    You have a Lovely hair Marie and a Lovely soul too! 🙂
    Thanks for being part of my life! 😀

    Warmly,
    Carlos.

  342. Marie, You are my hero! I laugh, I cry, I like you better than Cats.

  343. You are fabulous – seriously. My friend told me about you and said you are a must watch. My friend is a genius! And so are you. Thanks for the great info!
    Francesca

  344. Hey Marie,

    Thanks for your suggestions and advice for dealing with criticism. All of them are great points.

    It’s super smart to glean any useful messages and ideas from any criticism or feedback. We can learn so much from others’ perspectives, even ones we might not want to hear or that aren’t positive.

    I love your secret imaginary societies. ha! I think I’ll try your formal approach with some nasties I get from time to time. That’s hilarious.

    I’m a travel blogger who’s been traveling solo around the world since 1998, so I write about my own travel experiences: tips & advice, destinations, stories and so on. I’m known as a very upbeat, positive person who usually writes about all the wonderful places & activities I get involved with.

    But occasionally I dislike a place or have a bad experience. So I write about that, too. I just happened to dislike Cebu City, Philippines. Well, many locals were highly offended by my comments when they somehow discovered my article, and wrote some super rude, personal attacks on me as a person, my writing style and journalistic integrity.

    Some of them were so ridiculous and off-topic they made me laugh. “You’re just an ugly old hag” or “You have no fashion style” type comments. Too funny! What does my age or appearance have to do with my opinions about their city?

    At first I deleted the rudest comments. But there were so many that I decided to leave them on, which served to showcase to everyone else who visited just how ugly they were acting.

    I told them that everyone’s entitled to their opinions and there’s no reason to personally attack me for my views. I also pointed out that their anger, mean comments and rudeness were there for everyone to see, not just me. And that their behavior reflected on themselves, not on me.

    Luckily for me, the more outrageous and ill-placed those sorts of comments are the funnier I find them.

    I think I’ll start inviting certain people to not stay, as per your example. Good one!

    Thanks again for taking time to share your useful tactics for dealing with criticism.

    cheers, Lash

  345. It is amazing that I came across this video at the very moment someone decided to share their “input” with me. I’m also glad to see that I handled it in the right way. I feel there is a true difference when it comes to criticism and being rude. If someone truly cares (keyword: cares) about something you are doing and wants to offer input, they would do it in a private message. Doing it publicly has more to do with them, not you or me.

    Thank you, Marie, for your advice!

  346. Jason Torres

    Marie!!

    OMG! This video was BEYOND on point. Although every episode I watch of Marie TV tends to be, “my favorite”, this particular one will be one I will reference for a while. You had me rolling on this one and thank you for taking us back to old school Eddie Murphy- ha ha ha.

    For me, criticism has been hard to overcome for quite some time. I will say, however, that I have learned to engrain this phrase in my head when I receive negative criticism from anyone, and that is—

    CONSIDER THE SOURCE, JASON.

    So, whenever I get knocked down by negative criticism, I tell myself to consider the source of where it’s coming from. Most of the time it’s someone who doesn’t add any value to my life and so I’m able to remove them quickly. I have learned to really take charge of the space around me and in my mind.

    I think it’s important that we all take inventory of the individuals that we surround ourselves with; especially those who like to jab us with negative criticism.

    Why?

    Our space- that is the space in our mind and the space around us- is the most valuable piece of real estate in the world. Therefore, we should NOT allow people to be living in our space rent-free. If we have people in our circle of influence that do not contribute some kind of value in our life i.e. motivate us, inspire us, push us towards our goals, make us happy, etc., then they are living in our space RENT-FREE and we may need to make a decision about that.

    Let’s protect our, “real estate”. Under Armour believes that, “we must protect this house.” Well, I believe that we must protect our, “house” as well.

    Sorry for the long rant- ha ha ha. I don’t post very often, but I do enjoy this great community and because this is an area that fires me up, this episode really resonated with me.

    Take care you all!

    -Jason
    Charleston, SC, USA

  347. My own situation is strange. Strange in the sense that I don’t think I’ve faced criticism enough in my life. Most of the criticism I get is from myself and that is just in a bid to get better at everything I am doing. people don’t actually give me the criticism I desire. I actually believe I need to get out of my ‘friendly’ comfort zone and ease myself into the den of lions. I think I’m ready to learn from some bites and bruises.

  348. Rebecca Fonss

    Thanks Marie,
    I’ve been rolling around the idea of doing a blog/website and this is one issues that has been a concern for me. You made it seem much more manageable and as you talked it through it took the fear out of it.
    Thanks again!

  349. Thank you soooo much Marie for all your wonderful videos! You are always so uplifting, honest, funny, and genuinely beautiful in all that I see you do. Truly an inspiration.

    †Peace♥~Daisy

  350. Ivan Hernandez

    Thank you Marie and your fake hair (lol) suppose to be a joke for your don’t let criticism take you down video. I am constantly getting rumors spread about me, also me giving power to others. I just saw quite a few of your videos and you are a beautiful person both inside and outside. Thank you for the happiness you are bringing into this world.
    I am going into the Life Coach business. So I will be seeing many more of your videos for inspiration on how not to let others affect your energy and how I can bring happiness to others.

  351. Marie, this is awesome. The absolute HIGHLIGHT by far is at the end where you’re discussing your hair… major lol going on right here, and so much support to you for it! LOVE your spirit.

  352. JACOB ABBOTT

    I think your correct with what you have said in this video. Never give away your power, people set there attention on you when they dislike that they chose not to do anything with themselves. Let them say what they want to and keep pressing towards your mark for the prize… P.U.S.H…Pray Util Something Happens. That’s when you tell that person, Come dine in my jungle of brutal pleasures. “I’m King of the Gorilla’s and I approved this message”.

  353. Taryn

    I absolutely love those celebs reading out the nasty tweets about them; HiLaRiOuS. Thank you for sharing the link and thank you for being yourself and for always rocking it Marie! X

  354. Helle Buttrup

    That was GREAT hah ahahaha

  355. Hehe… loved the Eddy video throw in! Agreed on all solutions! Awesome video girly! xoxo

  356. I know I’m way late at watching this. The email sit in my inbox until I get some time to watch. Just have to say that this is a good one! Well…all except for the no pants part. LOL Love the response to the hair comment!

  357. Marie I can’t decide what I love more. This video or your hair. 😉 x

  358. ValerieLynns

    I love this article and enjoyed the comments. Here’s my take on it. You can shut out negative comments and criticism, and definitely need to if you’re going to stay sane, but sometimes it’s good to listen. When the criticism is given in a constructive manner – as in meant to help you improve, it still stings, but it’s good to take what you can from it. Sometimes you really do need to change something in your life, or your blog or your work skills etc. and other people can clue you in. Be especially attentive if you notice that more than one person has mentioned the same thing. You can still be you, just listen and learn how to be the best you.

    • Chelsea - Team Forleo

      Definitely true, Valerie!

  359. I LOVE, LOVE, LOVE when your stylist drops the hairbrush. I was like, “YES, honey!” I love what you do, Marie. You’re incredible and motivational. I love it.

    I hypersensitive to criticism. I’m still trying to practice my way into being less sensitive about criticism. I mean, I love good, constructive criticism. But the other stuff really gets to me.

    I will save your video on a YouTube playlist and watch again as needed.

    My Rx, Marie Forleo style.

  360. Maria

    Marie, you are just amazing!!

    I never though I ‘d met a person like you, so dynamic and yet so human oriented!!

    all the best!!

    • Caroline - Team Forleo

      Oh, thank you so much Maria – you’re so sweet! We’re honored to have you tuning in 🙂

  361. Cathy

    Best video EVER! Thanks for the brilliant advice and the laughs 🙂

  362. Anfal

    That was one crazy episode! No pants and how aggressive your hair stylist was over your hair to prove its all natural was just hilarious! made me laugh out laud in a public cafe!

    I have something interesting to share! actually the more criticism you get means that you are becoming more famous/successful/more people are jealous of you! Look at it this way, no one would notice the fantastic things you are doing to criticize unless what you are doing is super awesome! Its a sign! 😀

    keep up the positive spirit you spread all around the world! just don’t forget your pants next time! <3

  363. Best advice on this I was ever given (aside form this video of course) was from my teacher….”if it actually hurts than there is some part of you that believes the insult to actually be true and that’s why it hurts, so look deep at that first, transform it, then have a really good laugh, a genuine laugh at it and at yourself.”

  364. lmaoooooooo i just watched the jimmy kemmel link haaaaaaaaa – now that is a real LOL

  365. Angela Pearson

    OMG! I love you Marie! This was informative and entertaining. I’ve been getting your Q&A Tuesdays for a few years and have really enjoyed your transformation and have learned much in the time. Thank you so much for being you and telling the world like it is and how it can be!!! hugs

    • Caroline - Team Forleo

      Thank you so much, Angela! We’re thrilled that you’ve been tuning in for a few years now, and happy that you enjoyed this episode. 🙂

  366. Leigh

    Thanks Marie. I try always to remember that when people spew criticism that is not at all meant to be helpful but is just mean it has nothing to do with me and has everything to do with them and where they are at. If I have trouble letting it go I reach out to people in my life who really do know me and get a double check and a little support from them and move on.

    I spent a lot of time trying to be invisible because the family I grew up in was so critical and abusive that to be noticed was to be a target. No more. My life, my creativity and my work to do.

  367. I love you even more after this video Marie. You keep it real and people will always be negative to others shining there light. Thank you for all that you do in the world xx

  368. Olha

    Thank you so much Marie!! Really appreciate what you do. Keep on, we need you!!

  369. Vicky

    Love this thoughtful, powerful video Marie. You and your hair are fabulous! Keep lighting up the world x

  370. Hi Marie,

    I’ve been watching your videos for years literally and thanks to you and other mentors, I am now starting my own business to help companies transfer successfully through change processes. I wanted to take this opportunity to thank you, really, thank you, for all the value you are delivering.

    Warm Regards,
    Tonje Elisabeth Aaroe

  371. I have not built my list big enough to be hated…yet. Wish me luck guys!!!

  372. Israa

    LOVE ITTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTT SUPER HUGE LIKE, RIGHT ON THE RIGHT TIME

  373. Clare

    Compassion and humour. If someone hurts you, send them a silent blessing and move along to the next thing. I find that 99% of hurtful comments don’t make me mad, because I know deep inside (like in my gut somewhere) that they are having problems. Love your decisions…send silent blessings to others who are less fortunate

  374. After two months at my new job, at which I thought I was doing a great job, my new boss told me he thought I was only performing at 50% of what I promised I could do. And that he thinks I only spend time doing things I like to do, not what he wants me to do.

    This was a job with not one written operating procedure, and everything is in everyone’s heads. 10 months later, I am still ripping stuff out of peoples heads, and WRITING IT DOWN so the next person doesn’t have to put up with that kind of crap!

  375. I’ve always found that the criticism I fear the most, once I’ve received it, isn’t as bad as I feared. That’s empowering. And it allows me compassion for those who are in so much pain they try to tear down others.

  376. Oh my gosh, this video in my inbox is so timely. We recently implemented a new policy at my company to deal with a recent exponential increase in no-show appointments and last-minute cancellations, and when I posted it to our Facebook page all hell broke loose with two of our (now former) clients! It started with one woman taking offence (ahem…one of the worst offenders, natch), and she recruited a friend to help pile on me all. day. long. Every time my phone pinged it was another very public nasty comment from one of these two. It was really upsetting! I think my blood pressure was seriously elevated all day. Thankfully we had a lot of supportive comments from other clients, and also some very polite yet constructive criticism that helped us reevaluate and hone the policy to make it more easily acceptable, yet still work for us the way we need it to. It also helped me sharpen my customer service ninja skills, and I think I handled the two of them like a BOSS if I don’t say so myself. They are both persona non grata at the shop now and are free to darken someone else’s doorstep. Thanks, Marie, and also – from a pro – your hair is amazing, and obviously NOT fake. Kudos to your stylist as you always look fantastic. 🙂

  377. Esmeralda

    Hi Marie,

    I just wanna say thank you for all the things that you post on FB as well as on your webpage; they are motivating and useful. In my case, especially this video about how to deal with criticism (I think this has been the first time in my life I’ve read some advice about this topic). You are doing a great task by showing that success is based on being honest, generous and sympathetic, among other positive things. I think this is the future for society and business. Thanks! 🙂

    • Caroline - Team Forleo

      Esmeralda, thank you so much for your lovely note. We’re honored to have you tuning in, and happy to hear you’re finding our episodes motivating and useful! <3

  378. J S Williams

    Here is my bit of criticism, Marie. I find that I cannot focus on what you are saying because you are so gorgeous.

  379. Thank you so much for this video. I have tears in my eyes from laughing. Now every time I experience criticism I will be thinking of a huge steaming turd on my lounge room floor! For the record, your hair looks awesome, would love my locks to be that long

  380. Kae

    I watched this video a while ago but rewatching it right now was perfect timing. Recently one of my supervisors criticized me at a company meeting for not doing my job and told me that I don’t belong in the department. After letting my feelings get hurt about it for a few days what was said has become a running joke among me and my coworkers(most of whom I trained and still help them regularly when they are unsure about something). Now whenever any of the management asks me to help out with something or assist somebody, at least one of my coworkers will say something like why are you helping with this because remember you don’t know what you’re doing or belong here. then we get a nice little giggle in about it before I help them with the tasks at hand. Probably not the best way to laugh it off but it’s what’s working as far as not letting what was said sink into my soul.

  381. Tony Kates

    Very well said. We are never free from receiving criticisms, we just have to learn how to deal with them. It’s entirely up to us if we’ll let them make us or break us.

  382. Hermione

    I LOVE this video!! In fact, I have dwelled into criticism for two years! Can you imagine that! two years, I couldn’t focus on my business and all I thought about was one of my closed friends’ criticism. This was the worst feeling I have ever got, I even went into depress. ” Say nothing, doing nothing, and be nothing.” awesome sentence for me to take away today! Thank you so much Marie to make this happen.

  383. isabel

    Marie, your are awesome! and your hair…. omg!!! incredible. Please let us know how you take care of that beautiful treasure.

  384. Sophie Zhang

    This is soooooo helpful. You are AWESOME gurrrlllll!! Love you and your show soo much!

  385. As a photographer on board cruise ships, a lady once said to me, ” Every photograph you have taken of me is awful, you don’t know what you are doing”. My reply was, ” Madam, I am a Photographer, not a plastic surgeon”.

  386. Maria

    Marie,

    I love you I love you I love you!!!! Your authenticity rocks!

    Maria 🙂

    • Kristin - Team Forleo

      You’re so kind, Maria! Thank you! 🙂

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