Is This All There Is? How to Create a New Life Vision

For many of us, a change in season breathes life into our ever-growing list of hopes and dreams — things we want to experience, achieve and accomplish.

But what happens if that’s NOT true for you?

What happens when you’ve actually achieved your goal, and you’re left wondering…

Is this all there is?!?

What the heck are you supposed to do after your big dreams come true? 

We humans need more than goals to be happy. We need to constantly challenge ourselves, learn, grow, and contribute to others.

We need a compelling vision for our future to keep us moving forward.

How to Create a Clear Life Vision

Want to avoid an “Is this all there is” moment? The MarieTV below will help. A young viewer from India wrote in and asked…

Since I was a young girl I wanted to start my own business, travel the world, and make a name for myself. Today at 31 I’ve achieved most of that. So my question is, what do you do after your dreams come true? How do I get the same drive and passion I had when I was 24 before I achieved all my goals and realized my dreams?”

Tune in below to hear my answer, or keep reading. 

View Transcript

As Harvard professor Rosabeth Moss Kanter said, “A vision isn’t just a picture of what could be; it’s an appeal to our better selves, a call to become something more.”

I believe each of us has a deep hunger for more. To discover your own inner hunger and create a vision for life, ask yourself these questions:

  1. What’s your long-term vision? What would you like to see, do, and experience over the next 5, 10, or 20 years?
  2. What do you want to accomplish? Do you want to make an impact in the world? Is there a problem you want to solve? What’s important in your personal life, your professional career, business, family, and community?
  3. How do you want to have lived your life? Imagine yourself on your deathbed (hopefully far, far, far into the future). Describe the kind of life you want to look back on. How will you have spent the precious time you were given?
  4. What does the universe have in store for you? If you believe in a higher power, I suggest asking for guidance and being open to receiving it. Here’s a simple mantra: “You gave me gifts, I’m here to use them. Please show me the way.”

The Difference Between Visualization & Dreaming

If you’re thinking, “This sounds great, but does visualization actually work?” Look, nothing works unless you do. But here’s the truth. Visualization doesn’t have to be airy fairy. 

Don’t get hung up on the word. Call it creativity or simply making a plan. Whether you’re getting the keys to your new home, a big bonus check at work, or starting a business, you’re visualizing your future. 

Done right, you can create the life of your dreams. In fact, I bet you’re already visualizing — you just don’t know it yet. 

The key difference between dreaming and visualizing comes down to a simple script flip. 

Instead of thinking, “Wouldn’t that be nice?” tell yourself, “That’s a done deal.”

Now doesn’t that feel better? Can’t you just feel the confidence and power that comes with knowing you’ll get it done, rather than agonizing over whether it’s possible?

And here’s the thing: Once it’s done, you have a framework to tackle your next big dream. Then the next one and the next one. 

You Don’t Need a Long-Term Life Plan

While I’m a big believer in creating a clear vision for yourself, sometimes life just doesn’t work out the way we want. And that’s okay!

A failure might be a cosmic redirect, guiding you to a better, bigger purpose.

You don’t necessarily need a long-term vision to achieve success. Sometimes you just have to take the first step and gain clarity from there. Bring your A-game to everything you do. Trust me, a clear vision will eventually emerge. 

Do you think I had a clear vision of what my business would look like when I first started? Of course not!

I loved so many things, it felt paralyzing. I couldn’t envision my life more than six months into the future. Not having it all figured out didn’t keep me from starting, though.

Instead of one grand life vision, I started with mini, immediate goals, like:

  • Fill my hip hop classes and experiment with new choreography.
  • Get my first coaching client.
  • Write a consistent weekly newsletter.

I didn’t have a long-term vision. I just took the next right step every day and did the best I could. I worked hard at each of my passions until I eventually found convergence for myself and my passions. (Hello, multipassionate entrepreneur!) 

How to Envision the Future & Still Live in the Present

At first glance, training yourself to be present contradicts the whole notion of planning your future. But it’s not! You can absolutely balance being present with planning ahead.

You just need to know the difference between planning and worrying.

Planning keeps you in the present moment. Worrying takes you out of it. 

For example, think about rain on your wedding day. 

Worrying about rain is a future-based anxiety about something you can’t control. Planning, on the other hand, is about being prepared just in case it rains. It helps keep you in the present, because your preparation lets you set aside your worries about what will go wrong in the future.

Any time you find yourself worrying over your vision for the future, stop. Bring yourself back to the present, and redirect that energy into planning.

Where Will Your Life Vision Take You?

Look, achieving your goals is awesome, but real happiness comes from growth. Embracing the challenge of working towards your goals is far more fulfilling than achieving and checking them off your list.

A compelling life vision gives you a reason to meet those challenges head on. 

Again, you don’t have to have every step figured out. Conjuring up a vision for your future stimulates your imagination. It’ll help rediscover old dreams and ignite your passion so you can head in the right direction.

Now, let’s turn this insight into action.

Grab a journal, and take 5 to 10 minutes writing your life vision statement — in reverse. Imagine yourself on your deathbed, and describe the kind of life you want to look back on. 

What will you have achieved? What will you have spent your time doing?

Feeling depressed – like something’s missing? Try this.

I had no idea I was going to write about this today, but when I thought about whether or not I should mention it . . .

I don’t feel like I have a choice as I’m still pretty shaky.

Sunday afternoon we were hit pretty bad in a car accident.

Josh, myself and Kuma were driving down a quiet side street here in Venice when a driver sped through a back alleyway — without stopping — and slammed into the side of our car.

The impact was horrific. Glass shattered everywhere, and in an instant our car was forced underneath another parked car on the side of the road.

Thank God, we’re all fine (save nasty bruises, soreness, totaled cars, Kuma peed on my pants – LOL etc.).

The most upsetting thing though is how my mind keeps flashing these “alternate reality” scenarios in my head. These horrible, mini movies where if it were just a few seconds off . . .

Either Josh, Kuma or myself may not have survived. That’s really is the worst part for me — everytime I shut my eyes or try to rest, they come up.

So before we get into today’s episode, I invite you to take a moment to connect with and express your genuine love for the dearest people in your life.

Courage is being scared to death and saddling up anyway. - John Wayne Click To Tweet

Continue reading “Feeling depressed – like something’s missing? Try this.”

I Made A Mistake: What To Do When You’ve Said Something Stupid

I’m still buzzing from the music high of seeing Lady Gaga in concert this weekend at the Staples Center.

Yup. I wore a blonde wig, a cape and some funkytown glasses!

Whether you’re into Gaga or not, she’s an amazing performer. Her dancers are beyond (smokin’ hot, diverse in shape and color, talented, committed, expressive, unique) and she leaves it all on the floor, without apologies.

That type of grit and bold self-expression is incredible to witness.

One of the most inspiring moments of the night was when she paused on stage and said, “Five years ago I was still waiting tables in New York City. Don’t ever give up on your dreams.”

Beautiful, right?

And with that, let’s roll into this week’s new episode of MarieTV.

Have you ever said something stupid; something you wish you could take back?

An apology is the superglue of life. It can repair just about anything. - Lynn Johnston Click To Tweet

Stress can turn us all into “little monsters” (ha ha) who say some nasty things we later regret.

But is it possible to prevent those “foot in mouth” moments from happening in the first place? And if the damage has been done, what’s the best way to clean it up?

Continue reading “I Made A Mistake: What To Do When You’ve Said Something Stupid”

Burnt Out vs. Time for a Change

Imagine this . . .

You love what you do and you’re successful at it: making money, great clients, great team, etc. For years, you’ve worked your buns off to make this dream come to life.

But here’s the problem.

Something’s changed. You don’t feel excited about what you do anymore.

Most days, you feel kind of down and lost. And the truth is that you’ve been feeling this way for longer than you care to admit!

One can never consent to creep when one feels the impulse to soar. -Helen Keller Click To Tweet

So what do you do?

And how can you tell the difference between normal burnout vs. a sign that it’s time for a big change in your career?

Continue reading “Burnt Out vs. Time for a Change”

How To Deal With Jealousy & Being Intimidated By Another’s Success

First up, THANK YOU for your incredible support last week during Hurricane Sandy.

In the West Village we were without power, cell service and heat all week, but things got back on track over the weekend.

I’m deeply grateful to be safe and for your notes of love and concern via email, Twitter and Facebook.

Friends took great care of us and we were extremely lucky. In fact, I had some of the most rich and enjoyable experiences that I’ve had in years (limited access to technology tends to do that!).

However, the devastation from this storm, like all natural disasters in recent years, has left tens of thousands of people homeless. It’s demolished places I love dearly so please continue to send your prayers and support to the folks who truly need it.

Now onto today’s episode, which is something I think we can all relate to: feeling jealous.

There’s always room at the top. - Daniel Webster Click To Tweet

Continue reading “How To Deal With Jealousy & Being Intimidated By Another’s Success”